It wasn't till he awoke that Kaidan realized where he had stumbled too. As he slowly came too, he noticed that he was not in his small framed bed down in the crew's quarters, but instead had slept in Shepard's bed instead. He pushed the sheets away from him and took a deep breath, drawing in the sweet, soft lavender scent that used to linger around her. Her room had remained the same as the last night he'd been here. Her notes were sprawled across her desk. Books and unfinished reports sat on the corner of her couch, where they had been pushed as well on the night they got lost in each other. If he would've known it would be their last night together, he would've never let her go.
His mind had only allowed him to sleep for those few hours, for the nerve-wrecking possibility that he may see Shepard again prevented him for falling into a deep sleep. He straightened himself out and gazed around her room, taking it in. As expected, it was quiet, aside from the Normandy's familiar hum. But he desperately missed waking up tpthe droplets of water hitting the floor as Shepard took a shower. Or waking up to the never ending, fast paced, thumping as Shepard chipped away at her endless reports.. Or to the soft melody that she'd hum to while getting ready for whatever next the galaxy would throw at them. He sighed as he shook the memories wouldn't do him any good to fill himself with so much hope incase it wasn't her waiting for at the hospital. In the corner of his eye, he noticed the empty bottle of wine and their empty cups from the night before the Cerebus operation. He slowly got up and walked over to them. He picked one of cups up and brought it close to his chest. "Oh Shepard.. I hope that…" He swallowed his tears. "That you're still with us. I feel it in my heart that you are." He quietly whispered his plea, afraid that he was hoping for too much.
Almost immediately after, Joker's voice came into the speaker, interrupting his thoughts,
"Major, we are about to dock into the Citadel."
Kaidan's heart began to pick up its pace as he quickly placed the cup down on her desk, put on his shoes, and rushed over to meet Joker and the rest of their squad in the airlock.
The Normandy began its effortless and graceful descent, leaving the infinite amount of stars and immense, unknown vastness that made up the galaxy, and once again flawlessly docked inside the Citadel's D24 docking bay. Numerous parts of the Citadel were under repair. Communities were covered in soot, debris and many laid in ruins. Several streets were blocked off due to the extent of their severity. The docks was also closed off and under repair due to the extensive damage it sustained from the explosion. Burnt out C-Sec vehicles laid untouched or in ruins, small airships leaned against walls while others had collided with each other. It all was just another reminder of what taken place, and what could've happened.
Arrivals and departures to and from the Citadel had been severed until further notice, but since the Normandy had came in for an emergency, it was cleared by Hackett to proceed.
Joker quickly notified the crew of the situation and got them ready by the time Kaidan caught up with them. As they took their first steps, they couldn't believe how difference the docking bay they have came to know, looked. It had become part of the warzone. And thanks to their efforts, to Shepard's efforts, they had managed to save it, along with the galaxy. They were met by Alliance soldiers who were to escort them to Huerta Memorial Hospital. However, on their way to the elevator, the people of the Citadel, whether they were workers or citizens, of any race, species and class, broke the silence that had engulfed them and cheered and welcomed them. It filled Kaidan's heart with joy to know that he was a part of this. That they all were. That Shepard was able to make this possible.
As they stepped off the elevator, Kaidan broke the silence that had taken its own presence between them. "I will go ask what room she is located in it, you guys wait here." He could feel his heart start to race and the slight perspiration begin to build as the anxiety to find out the truth grew with each step he took to the front desk. In fact, they all were anxious. Their eyes would flicker around as they examined each patient that passed through them, hoping to recognize their dear Commander in one of them.
A young human woman, who appeared to be the receptionist, caught Kaidan in the corner of her eye walk in and immediately recognized him.
"Major Alenko! It is a pleasure to have you here!" She said in a bubbly tone. Smiling brightly in an attempt to get his attention.
"Thank you ma'am." He replied softly as he returned the smile.
As she sensed her superior's eyes on her, she quickly straightened herself and changed her tone. "How may we help you?" This time, sounding completely neutral.
Kaidan leaned against the counter. "I was told to come by and possibly identify a female human that was brought here from Earth. Could you possibly point me to what room she is located in?"
The receptionist turned to face her computer and searched the screen. "Oh yes!" She continued to scroll down the page. "We have a notification that you were coming by." She pointed to right. "She should be in room 2. " She said quietly.
He gave her a quick a nod. " Thank you again." He nervously said as he walked away, motioning the crew to follow him.
Each step he took, felt more antagonizing than the last. His fear of what may be, ate away at him as the suspense kept building around him as each burning second passed. He began to wonder what he would say if it was her. What he would do. Then his mind rushed to how he would feel if it wasn't. Lost deep in his thoughts, it wasn't till he arrived at her door that he realized it wasn't a long distance to where his answer laid. He stood there. His body stiff and frozen with the extreme fear of the unknown. He could feel the slight shaking of his legs as they dared to give in. Or the trembling in his hands at his sides. The crew stood closely behind him, just as afraid as he was.
Until Joker spoke up. "Go on, we will wait here." He shot Kaidan a genuine smile. "No matter what happens, we got your back buddy." The rest of the crew nods in agreement. With the small boost of confidence,
Kaidan gratefully nodded at them. "Thanks guys." He took a deep breath before stepping towards the sliding doors.
He had never held his breath as much as he did in that moment. Whoever she was, there she laid. The woman that could, or could not be Shepard. His Shepard. The love of his life. He couldn't make out her face yet, for she was facing away towards the window.
As he walked forward, he noticed the salarian doctor standing at the corner of the room, reading a small clipboard.
"Major Alenko! Glad you could make it." He extended his hand out to greet him.
Kaidan while keeping his gaze fixed on her, shook his hand. "Yeah, no problem." He manages to mumble out.
Sensing his distantness, the doctor straightened himself out and cleared his throat. "I'll give you a few minutes alone to see if you recognize her." He put his glasses on and walked out of the room to speak with a nurse.
Kaidan closed the short distance between him and the bed and slowly reached for her hand. It felt warm, and fit his like Shepard's did. He knew at this point it was still a long shot, but it foolishly started to build his hope. His gaze quickly scanned over the small framed woman which caused him to notice that most of the blood had been cleaned off, but that her body still laid covered in bruises. He slowly and gently placed his hands on her cheek, careful to awaken or hurt her, and tilted her face towards his. A small tear of joy slided down his face as his heart skipped a beat at the sudden revelation. "Shepard.. It is you.." Tears suddenly threatened to cover his face. Albeit out of joy, happiness and love. He couldn't explain the extreme he felt in that moment. He barely was able to contain his overwhelming emotions.
While her face still remained partly bruised, he still recognized her. Kaidan was able to recognize her scars. The ones she has acquired along the years. In Feros, in Ilos, in Horizon, and many the others after and in between. He recognized her slightly pointed nose that he had dearly come to love. His eyes then gazed over her lips. The curvature of her lips was something he could never forget. He then gently brought his hands to her cheeks, cupped her face and softly pressed his lips against hers. After he felt her stir underneath him, he reluctantly pulled back in fear of having hurt her. At the same he heard the sliding doors open and saw Joker's head poke inside.
"Major..?" He asked curiously, seemingly anxious to know.
Kaidan let out a chuckle and motioned him to come in with the crew in tow. "It is her." He heard himself say. It felt as if he still couldn't believe it himself.
They all slowly started to surround her, putting their own doubts to rest. It truly was her. She had come back to them, badly injured, but in one piece and alive.
The salarian doctor eventually came back, with his clipboard in his hand. "So, Major Alenko, were you able to recognize her?"
Kaidan cleared his voice and pushed away his emotions for the moment. "Yes, Doctor, this is Commander Shepard. Not only I, but all of us here, vouch that this is her. "
The doctor made note of his announcement before pulling a small object from his pocket. "We found this clutched in her hand, it has the letters 'EDI' engraved in it. Perhaps you know what is?" He handed Kaidan over a small computer chip.
At the mere sound of EDI's name, Joker bolted up, "I'll take that." He quickly spurted out, taking the chip swiftly from the doctor's hands.
"Very well.. " Said the doctor as he gave Joker a sideways glance before turning back to face Kaidan. "She should be awakening soon by the way, her injuries have been treated and tended to, all that is left if for her bruises to go down on their own, and for her to rest. Now if you have any other questions.." He lingered.
"No, thank you for everything you have done for her, Doctor." Kaidan went and shook the doctor's hand before the doctor went to his next patient.
Suddenly, Liara shouted out, "Look! She's waking up! Shepard?" She rushed to her side.
Shepard grunted and moaned out in pain. "L..iara?" She mumbled as she slowly opened her eyes, blinding herself with the room's unexpected light along with the sunlight that shined through the window.
"Yes! It's me!" She squealed.
"Commander, you're alive!" Came from James.
"You always find a way back to us Commander." Said Joker with a content smirk on his face.
"It's great to have you back, Shepard! Wouldn't have been the same without you." Added Garrus.
"Shepard! Kee'la! You're alive!" shouted Tali as she leaned into Garrus, happy to see her dear friend and commander..
"Thank God you're alright Shepard! You had us worried sick.." Came from her close friend, Cortez.
She scanned the room, until she caught Kaidan standing next to her, with a big smile on his face.
He reached for her hand and gave it a small squeeze. "Shepard…" His voice breathless "You're..you're alive.. "
"You almost sound like you don't want me to be, Kaidan," She joked as she straightened herself, wincing at the unexpected pain that shot through her back. "It's nice to see all you guys made it.. I..I was afraid." Her voice trailed off as her glance hit Joker which suddenly caused her to remember the chip. "The chip!" She yelled out as she pulled her hand away from Kaidan's grip, desperately searching her around her. "Where is it?" She tried to get out of bed to search more.
"Oh no you don't. " Said Kaidan as he placed her back. "You are staying here until you are fully rested you hear?" His was voice stern, yet hinted at a playfulness, unable to contain any sort of assertiveness due to the overjoy of seeing her again.
"But-" She tried to refute.
"No. No buts. In fact, you are not allowed on any other mission for a long while. Oh and Joker has the chip you are looking for. The doctors found you clutching it in your hand. "
Shepard let out a sigh of relief. She couldn't help but smile. She was back. She had her crew back, her family. She turned back to Kaidan. She had the love of her life back. "I don't think you can keep me from action, Kaidan."
He chuckled as he raised his eyebrow "Is that a challenge, Commander? Plus I think we deserve a break."
She swatted her hand at him, gently hitting his chest. "Maybe." She closed her eyes briefly as she let out a sigh. "Maybe you're right. But right now, I am glad you are all here. I love you guys so much. You guys are my family. My reason I did what I did, and my reason to continue doing what I do, and I am just glad to spend this moment with you all…" Suddenly a memory rushed in her head. "Oh and Joker, before EDI.." She swallowed, not wanting to say it." EDI died..She gave me the chip.. She told me every part of her was there and to give it to you and tell you that she can be rebuilt on the Normandy."
Joker smiled as he tried to fight back his tears.. "Thanks, Commander." He said softly.
Liara then spoke up. Her voice warm, but serious. "We love you too. Not only are you our commanding officer, but I think I speak for everyone here, when I say, we care a great deal about you and care what happens to you. So next time, please consult us before you try to blow yourself up."
Shepard couldn't help but let out a small laugh. "I will try"
Kaidan took her hand in his once more and held it tight. He stared longingly at her while she spoke with her friends. He also felt content. He wanted nothing more than to savor this moment. To be with his crew, who has become his family, and with Shepard.
Shepard, with the insisted help from Kaidan, attempted to prop up against the small bed frame. A small sigh escaped her. She hated feeling weak and dependent on others. It wasn't what she felt was supposed to be.
"So, how is Earth..?" She dared to ask. She felt reluctant to, but deep inside of her was the burning desire to know.
Kaidan took a deep breath before responding. "We are.. recovering." He let out a sigh. "Plans have been put in motion to begin rebuilding cities. That's how they found you. Don't get me wrong..It is going to be a long time before Earth looks like it used to, but at least people can start going back to a sense of normalcy. " He said with smile. "All thanks to you." She returned his smile.
"However," chimed in Joker. "We can't return, or even leave the Citadel, least not until the Normandy finishes some well-needed maintenance and repairs. We did what we could after crashing into that forest, we barely were able to make it here. So for the moment we are all stuck here.. Hurray for shore leave!"
Shepard tried to stifle a laugh." Yeah.." She cringed at the memory of dealing with her own clone."Let's hope nothing like last time happens again.." She then took a look at the rest of her crew. "And how are you guys doing? How are your planets?"
Garrus stepped up first. "Like Earth, the Reapers were taken out and we were able to fight off the remaining forces. We are also attempting to rebuild and recover from the war." His voice sounded tired, but full of relief. It has been so long since they have been able to just relax and know that everything will be okay for once.
Liara's soft voice came swiftly after Garrus. "My home is taking care of the refugees, and making sure our people are taken care of before we begin to see the damage that has been done."
The rest of her crew mimicked similar responses to what Garrus and Liara had said. With Tali adding that thanks to Legion and the geth, they are rebuilding her homeland. After hearing that everyone has been saved, Shepard let out a huge sigh of relief.
"I know we faced some great losses.. " Her mind raced to Legion, Mordin, Ashley, and Anderson. The person that had become like a father figure to her. "I know we desperately wished they could be here, accompanying us. But they will forever live in our hearts. They will always be a part of us. Their sacrifice so that we could be here, in this moment will forever be remembered. And I am so thankful and glad that all of you guys have made it through. You guys are not only the best crew I have ever had the pleasure to command. But you guys are the best family I could have ever asked for."
She felt herself begin to tear up and wiped her eyes before anyone would notice. "And I am eternally grateful to have met you all." She ended, before more tears spilled on her face.
"Awh, Shepard you're gonna make us cry." said Joker as he walked over to give her a hug. The rest of the crew follows him.
Once they dispersed, Shepard cleared her throat. "I don't know how long you guys plan on staying here at the Citadel, and I hope I didn't drag you guys out from something important.." Her face cringed once again. "But you guys are more than welcome to stay at my apartment. Since Garrus added some new 'security measures' last time he was there..." She raised an eyebrow at Garrus, who was beaming with joy. "He can let you in and you can help yourselves to what you want." She added with a small smile to everyone in an attempt to try to hide her tiredness and pain.
"Why thanks Shepard!" Garrus said with excitement. "I've been wanting to see how my "additions' have been holding up. "Let's go everyone! We should let Shepard rest. " he adds, quite gleefully.
After each person had said their goodbyes, and given her small hugs, Garrus was the last at the door. He looked back at Shepard, who now only had Kaidan standing beside her. "And Shepard.. We are throwing one hell of a party when you get out." He said with a smirk. Shepard weakly smiled. "Hell yeah we are."
Garrus returned the smiled and took his leave. "Hey wait up!" he yelled out to his fellow crew and hurriedly rushed to catch up with them.
Kaidan reached out for the doctor's chair and placed it next to her bed before sitting down. He could tell Shepard was tired, and that she needed sleep. But he didn't want to leave her side. Not now, not ever.
"Kaidan.." She caressed his cheek softly. "You don't have to stay, I will be fine. Go, have fun with the others."
Feeling the warmth of her fingers on his skin again, the touch of her softness against his rugged face, left him with the butterflies he always felt when he was around her. It reminded him of the first moment he saw her, and how he sheepishly stared after her. As he brought his mind back to his present, he smiled briefly as he wrapped her hand over hers and took a deep breath. Seeing her alive and responsive brought him more relief than he could've imagined. He almost couldn't believe she was there. All the stress he's dealt with in the previous days, the fear that had begun to eat him alive before, in that moment, it all left him.
"Shepard..I will never leave your side. " He tenderly kissed her hand, his lips lingering briefly. "Not now, not ever."
He then leaned in and kissed her, careful to move her I.V fluids, or to cause her any pain. At the touch of his lips on hers, her body suddenly became weightless. She wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer towards her, and passionately returned the kiss. Needing it now more than ever. The world around them just seemed to disappear as the kiss deepened. They were no longer living on borrowed time, yet she wanted to savor this moment just as she savored their last moments together.
After what felt like hours, but only was only a minute, Shepard reluctantly pulled away in an attempt to catch her breath. "What.." she panted. "Are we getting married or something? " She joked.
"You can bet that day is coming." Kaidan said with a smirk. He knew that what he just said had taken her by surprise.
Her eyes widened. "Kaidan.. don't play with me.." She said half jokingly, trying to hide her astonishment.
He huffed as he raised up from his seat and walked around her. "Do I ever dare to play a joke on you? You're Commander Shepard for shit's sakes. Everyone knows not to joke with you. Well except for Joker, but he kinda has to" He joked before suddenly getting down on one knee next to her bed.
"Commander Catherine Shepard, I don't have any special ring to present to you today, but what I do have is my love, my heart, and my soul. All of these belonged to you from the very beginning. Watching you leave.. Afraid that it would've been the last time I'd see you.. It decimated me.. I felt so stupid for being weak and not be able to be at your side. But I knew you would come back." He smiled briefly at her as he placed his hand over hers. "While all of this may not mean much, I ask you to please to accept them, in exchange for your hand in marriage.. Shepard I love you.." He chuckled. "Hell I love you more than I will ever know.. But will you.. Will you marry me..?" His voice shook in the end. He knew that he was asking for a lot. But they've been through a lot. And he's been thinking about this day since after Horizon. After he found out she was alive from the first Normandy attack. But with the war, he felt it would've not been an appropriate time to ask. Hell, they didn't even know for certain if they were going to make out alive. But here they were now. Against all odds they had survived. And he didn't want to waste another moment. So there he was, on one knee, asking the woman he loved, to marry him.
Shepard's eyes widened again. Her face was in complete shock and astonishment. Tears started to roll down her face. She couldn't believe Kaidan had just asked her to marry him. She didn't admit to anyone, but throughout the last months they had spent together, she constantly thought about how much she wanted to spend the rest of her life with him. She never thought he would ask her though, especially with all the distractions they had, their work, along with the war.. She didn't think it was possible. She didn't anything was possible. But after almost dying twice on him, not to mention all those close death encounters, she didn't want to lose this opportunity. Hell, they were both Spectres. She was sure she could working something out with the Council that will allow them to continue to work together. She did just save the galaxy from utter destruction.
She took a deep breath before finally saying, "Yes.. Yes! " She mustered all of her strength to get up from her bed.
He tried to stop her and was about to place her back on the bed. But he should've have known better. She pushed his hands away, pulled his body close, and kissed him hard. After a few seconds however, she began to wobble. She hasn't stood in days, and therefore her legs were unused to the sudden weight shift and well gravity. And the energy she had used to suddenly stand, had begun to leave her. He pulled her back and supported her by wrapping his arms around her waist. "I am pretty sure I was the one who was to supposed to pull you in and kiss you." He said with a raised eyebrow.
She chuckled. "Yeah, but I beat you too it." She said with a soft, familiar cockiness that he's missed. With his support, she wrapped her hands around his neck once more, and pulled him in for another kiss. She then slightly pulled her lips from his and smiled "I love you Kaidan." She said before giving him a slightly stern look. "Specter Alenko, I would be honored to become your wife."
He smiled. His brown eyes shined as they filled up with joyful tears that had threatened to escape since he realized it was truly her. Now, he truly felt like he was the luckiest man in the world. His future stood there, in his arms and for that, he was eternally grateful. However, as much as he wanted to bask in this moment, he felt her body tiring. Her eyes seemed more collapsed than before, and the bags under her eyes suddenly became evident."Sweetheart." He said softly.
The word sent a shock throughout Shepard's body. They have been used to being so formal with each other due to their work, that they have skimmed through what normal couple would do and call each other. It brought a small smile upon her.
"Sweetheart..." He repeated, interrupting her thoughts.
"Huh..?" She said in a hushed whisper.
"You need to rest." He said reluctantly.
"Well, I admit...I've had better looking days..." She started. Her hands go to her face, tracing small bumps and scars that were forming and healing.
"No, no." He shook his head."You look beautiful." He reassured her. "I mean, you need to rest, so that you can feel better, recover and come home."
With his help, she wobbled back to her bed. "Home.." She turned to look at him. Her green eyes shined brightly, but tirelessly and said."Home is wherever you are."
He gave her a small smile. "Sleep now, love. I will be here, holding your hand." She smiled and nodded, taking his hand in hers.
"I love you.." She said in a sleepy tone before her eyes slowly closed. Her breathing had slowed down, and Kaidan, as promised, took his spot next to her. He leaned his head against the side of her arm, and like Shepard, drifted away into much needed sleep.