Chapter Four aka The one where Mei's work is (spoiler)

Chapter Text

A Team Pigeons Production:

Milk and its Derivatives

Co-written and edited by Why and Joe.

Communion

Families were loud, something that Mei would have never guessed before meeting Ume and Yuzu. Until she met them, family had been nothing but long speeches and longer silences.

The sight of her dining room table was something else. It was a fine mess, covered in containers, plates, glasses, water bottles and several beer cans. As always, Yuzu went overboard and had ordered way too much food. "Better safe than sorry" she had stated proudly and ignored Mei's advice, as she always did when food was involved.

Mei had to admit that her family formed a beautiful picture. From her position by the kitchen counter, she had full view of them.

Ume and Yuzu were emphatically discussing something and it was enthralling to look at them They shared the same expressions, the same laughs and both were gesticulating wildly.

Atsuko was all but standing on Shou's lap, treating her father as if he was her personal playground. She was balancing herself on his thighs by holding on his head. Shou had nothing of the man she remembered from her own childhood. He was loud now whenever he talked or laughed. His face was no longer strict and expressionless and he kept smiling at making amused faces while talking to his youngest daughter. It was a sight she had struggled to get used to and a sight she could hardly look away from.

Atsuko's hair was something else. Yuzu had worked nothing short of a masterpiece. She had gathered the top of their little sister's hair into three braids and further weaved them to form a single one. She had worked the sides of Atsuko's dark locks as well, two braids for each side, those too were pulled back to converge into the single big braid that gathered at the base of her neck. She knew Yuzu had not woven the locks too tightly, so that upon bedtime the hair would easily come undone.

Mei filled her cup with green tea and decided she no longer wanted to be an observer. She walked back to her seat beside Yuzu.

"I helped Nee-san with work!" Atsuko stated proudly and turned around to smile at her mother when Ume complimented her on it. By her side, Yuzu broke into a laugh.

"You two weren't working when I got there!" Yuzu's cheerful tone filled the air and Mei's lips softened at the memory of the spontaneous nap she had shared with her little sister.

"I have photographic evidence!" Her lover continued, sounding quite proud of herself.

"She helped me more than you ever did, Yuzu" Mei deadpanned while taking a sip of tea.

Yuzu turned around and smugly whispered to her. "If anything, you got even less work done when I was around."

Mei almost choked on her tea. She kicked Yuzu under the table only for her lover to put a warm hand on her knee. She felt Yuzu's thumb trace slow yet firm patterns over her bare skin and decided that it was safer to focus on what Atsuko was saying for the time being.

"...And we went to the Dome and I rode the roller coaster-" Atsuko made wide circular motions with her arms, as Yuzu always did before naming the ride, almost hitting Shou in the face. "-the Thunder Dolphin!"

She plonked back down in Shou's lap with a hard thud. Mei saw her father wince, but after a second his smile was back.

"Did you really, Atsu-chan?" Shou asked while playfully poking his child's cheek.

"Yes, Papa! Yuzu-nee took me!" Yuzu flashed a victory sign Atsuko's way and smiled proudly.

"AH! I would never get on something like that." Shou shook his head. "It is not natural to subject yourself to such speed"

Mei nodded at her father's words and paused for a second at the very notion. As ridiculous as it sounded, she knew that she was not far from blushing over the shared opinion.

She felt Yuzu squeeze her knee gently under the table and turned to her lover with a grateful look in her eyes. She reached down to place her hand on top of Yuzu's and was more than happy when Yuzu's fingers entwined with her own. She felt Yuzu's finger firmly caress the ring she was wearing, twin to Yuzu's own, their irreplaceable treasures. Her beloved had gifted her with it about seven years ago.

Yuzu had wished to get new rings for them, being self conscious of how cheap the original ones were. They could afford something unique after all but Mei had outrightly opposed the idea. No ring could ever replace the one she had. It had become a part of her, just as much as her limbs were.

"- and then I got sick." Atsuko continued while blushing slightly. "But it was all right because I didn't complain!"

"She didn't!" Yuzu leaned forward to bump fists with her little sister. "Not a peep"

"She was quite brave." Mei added, feeling as if she had been too quiet until then.

"… and very sleepy." Ume intercepted when Atsuko yawned and rubbed her eyes with the backs of her hands. Ume stood and the most loving smile that Mei had ever seen appeared on her face.

She invited her young daughter into her arms. Atsuko went more than willingly and immediately wrapped herself tightly around her mother, burrowing her face in her shoulder.

Ume raised one hand to the back of Atsuko's head and held her gently against her neck. She rocked slightly, hips swaying smoothly, the most natural motion in the world. She breathed in her daughter's scent and her face softened into a blissful expression.

"I can't believe I am not going to see you until tomorrow afternoon." She murmured ruefully.

Atsuko said something Mei could not quite catch, it made Ume smile though and that was always a beautiful sight for her.

"I will run her a quick bath and get her ready for bed." Ume informed the table before leaving the room.

It was then that Yuzu's phone started ringing, or rather erupted into a song Mei had little taste for.

In a quick turn of events, Ume had disappeared with Atsuko and Yuzu had moved to take a call from Matsuri. Matsuri would ring at every hour, but if Yuzu had opted to take the call in another room, it surely had to be work-related and might take a while.

Mei went perfectly still upon realizing that she and her father were alone in the room. She felt a familiar tension take hold of her and was left unable to look anywhere but at the table.

Her father's hand entered her field of vision when the man reached over to help himself to Ume's glass of Sapporo Yebisu. That seemed rather peculiar to Mei since her father had drunk nothing but water until then. Mei had little taste for alcohol herself and would only sip on the odd glasses of champagne during social gatherings.

"Mei." She turned toward Shou, surprised rather than attentive. It seemed that her father was just as nervous as she was. Shou rubbed the back of his neck and his eyes darted about the room. "I am truly thankful for all that you and Yuzu have done for Atsuko."

Mei felt relieved. Atsuko was one of the few topics, if not the only one, that she could discuss with her father freely without fearing the possibility of the discussion shifting to past grievances... Or so she thought.

"It is our duty as her older sisters to-" Mei fell into the conversation with practiced formality and was rather startled when her father interrupted her.

"Ah! Yes, that might be it." Shou leaned back in his chair while crossing her arms over his chest. "But I would say that it goes far beyond that."

"The way she talks about you…" Shou's voice was warm and full of wonder. He was clearly entranced by the bond his daughters shared. "Atsu-chan thinks you hang the Sun." He said with a smile.

"The Moon." Mei felt that was not the first time she had this particular conversation about the solar system.

"The Moon, The Sun-" Shou shrugged. "-she probably thinks you hang both and the stars as well."

"That would be rather time consuming, father." Mei took another sip of tea, using the cup to conceal her smile.

At that moment, a confused expression flashed over Shou's face, it lasted but a second though as he quickly grew pensive. He tilted his head back to stare at the ceiling. "I'm not of much help, I'm aware of that."

Since Atsuko's birth, he had been spending more time at home, way more, and he always tried to be there for important events. Even so, his schedule was hectic as he was always running about, trying to secure funds for his charity projects or taking calls at odd hours from all over the world.

Ume's schedule was slightly gentler but still difficult to work around a small child. Yuzu had many off-days but often would have to spent whole nights out. As it was, Mei was the one with the most stable working schedule.

"Yet I've never seen-" Shou stopped mid sentenced seemingly to gather his thoughts, he was still rocking back on his chair. "It's what any parent would wish for their child, to be as happy as she is." He said and finally lowered his head to look directly at Mei.

"It is rather easy to care for her." Mei spoke candidly.

"She surely was disappointed when it was me and not you that went to retrieve her from her kendo class…" Shou's voice was rather amused. It was clear that he was truly happy over the closeness his two daughters shared. Mei deserved a family more than anyone else and he would never be able to thank Ume and Yuzu properly for taking them into their own.

"We always stop at the library on the way home." A blush appeared over the tips of Mei's ears as she tried to rationalize Atsuko's reaction. "She loves that."

"Mmm…" Shou did not sound convinced. Not at all. "I think I might have upset her." He confessed while releasing a long sigh.

"How so?" Mei questioned, finally able to set her eyes on his father's face.

"She confessed to not be that good at kendo-"

"She lacks the proper coordination." Mei cut in uncharacteristically. "She is rather tall for her age, so it is not surprising." She felt compelled to intercede on Atsuko's behalf even though it was rather unnecessary.

"You were just as tall at six." Shou tilted his head while smiling ruefully, savoring a memory from long ago. "But you were always so graceful"

Mei lost her poise at Shou's words. Her face slackened at the thought of her father remembering such a detail from her own childhood. Someone had been paying attention to her then, if only for a short while. As soon as the bittersweet thought touched her, she recalled her wits about her.

"Six and a half." She said.

"Huh?"

"She is six and a half." She repeated as an easy smile appeared on Shou's lips.

"Of course." His smile grew even wider as he nodded. "The half is very important to her."

"She is quite fast though." Mei was convinced that as long as she kept the conversation firmly on Atsuko, no more awkwardness would envelope their discourse.

"Is she?" He was genuinely surprised.

"Yes." Mei allowed herself a small smile. "Sugimori-sensei went to great lengths to have her in her track team. Atsuko has no interest in it though"

"She should do what she loves." Mei was in perfect agreement with her father's statement.

"She loves kendo."

"Ah!" Shou's mind went back to the beginning of the conversation. "When I told her it didn't matter that she was no good at it as long as she had fun, she got rather upset." He breathed out a sigh and started rocking his chair once again. "-even though she is a cute as her mother when she pouts…" His voice trailed off as he kept musing.

"She wants to be good at it." It was so very obvious to Mei. "It is important to her. It is something she loves. She wants to improve." Mei had a lot of sympathy for her sister's plight. Although she was not familiar with the frustration of failing at something she wished to achieve, she knew all too well how it felt to have little power over something.

"Yeah." Shou stretched the word dramatically. "I figured that after she quoted you…"

Mei tilted her head in an inquisitive fashion while Shou took a breath before solemnly stating, in what a was fairly accurate impression of Atsuko's voice -"Nee-san says I will improve as long as I persevere!"

"… that is what I always tell her. Yes." Mei felt another smile forming on her lips, not as small this time. She welcomed it.

"Ah! What can I say?" Shou run his hand over his head in embarrassment.

"You are a better father then I am Mei . . . and I am not surprised."

A raft of emotions struck Mei upon hearing her father's comment and she struggled to formulate a proper response. At first, she did not know for certain whether Shou was praising her own childcare skills or lamenting his lack of them. A bittersweet sense of clarity began to form and her eyes widened when the revelation finally struck her.

"Just what does Atsuko mean to me?"

For the first time, the answer was clear to her. She and Yuzu had carved out a comfortable life with their little sister. An idyllic life that was full of more happiness than she had previously believed to be possible. They were a family.

The word had always had contradictory implications for Mei. Family had always meant duty and responsibility to her but after meeting Yuzu, it began to also mean love, protection, comfort and now, the word had taken a new meaning: Parenthood. Mei was fully aware of the physiological limitations of her and Yuzu, but she had become adept at pretending that Atsuko was her own child without even noticing.

The sight of Yuzu walking back into the kitchen gave Mei the reprieve she so desperately needed. She was still in the grip of shock, still stunned over something she should have realized a long while ago but if she could focus on Yuzu, she knew her lover would provide her with the strength to center herself and she would be able to stop her mind from running thoughts she was still not ready to face head on.

"Is something the matter, Yuzu?" She asked while taking note of Yuzu's haggard mood. Yuzu's dismayed appearance gathered her attention quickly and completely.

Yuzu sat down by her side and let out a long sigh. She put her elbow on the table and rested her face against her hand. She looked quite deflated.

"Matsuri says the pigeon problem has resurfaced... I knew we should have booked a different venue."

"It is not too late to, perhaps." Mei suggested, honestly wishing to be of help. Although she knew that the nature of Yuzu's work edged on timing and it was vital for the first choice to be the correct one.

"I don't kn-" Yuzu's stopped talking and her tense face relaxed as she was overcome by tenderness.

It was Ume's delicate but firm voice. She was singing a lullaby to her youngest daughter and there seemed to be a spell in her voice, once it reached the three of them, it cast the room into silence, as to become the only sound.

Shou smiled to himself and closed his eyes while Yuzu's smile grew bigger and bigger, until it reached her eyes and made them shine in a way that even Mei had never witnessed before. She appeared elated and nostalgic at the same time. Perfectly safe yet vulnerable. It was something Mei had little understanding of. It was probably related to her childhood. It was surely related to Ume.

Mei listened to the calm singing emanating from the other room and marvelled at Ume's ability to be so tuneful after several cans of beer. She contemplated whether her biological mother had ever sung to her and after struggling to recall any specific memories, she further focused her attention on the muffled song as though to make up for lost time.

Moonlight Sonata

Yuzu finished tidying up after the meal and smiled to herself. She had been extra quick with the cleaning so that she could surprise Mei by joining her in the bathtub. It had been a taxing day for the two of them and they had only managed to share fleeting moments together; A light kiss here, a brief touch there and the odd romantic glance was all that the pair had managed since they first woke up. It was not enough. Yuzu sought to right that wrong before the day was through.

She gleefully skipped down the hallway but stopped when she saw the solitary figure in the doorway to Atsuko's room. Yuzu was fully aware that her lover had been through a challenging day; they had discussed it after Yuzu had done Atsuko's hair.

They had stolen the private moment together while Ume and Atsuko had busied themselves with building some new Lego set that Yuzu had bought for her sister. Yuzu was aware of how much she spoiled Atsuko. She bought her a new outfit every few weeks, sometimes she even got her Lego, even though that was also Ume's usual choice of gift.

After all, her beloved spoiled Atsuko just as much. The two floor-to-ceiling bookcases in her room were proof of that.

However Mei's pensive expression confirmed to her that her run-in with her grandfather was not the only thing bothering her. Over the years, Yuzu had grown to become very attentive to Mei's feelings and could always tell when something was off. It had been that way since they had finished the meal and she would not be able to sleep soundly until she had learned what was on Mei's mind.

Yuzu took a deep breath and nodded to herself. Whatever it was did not matter, she was absolutely certain that there was nothing they could not face together. It was not just a romantic notion. They were quite remarkable individuals by themselves, but together they became formidable. Unstoppable.

"Mei…" She whispered, approaching her lover.

Mei had had every intention of taking a bath. She was able to always find a measure of calm whenever she relaxed into the warm water and her mind had never needed it more. Upon finding the door of Atsuko's room half-opened, she had been unable to resist the temptation of looking at the child. The perfect wonder that was Atsuko, a real proof of Ume and Shou's love. She could spot her outline thanks to the little night lamp that cast its small glow about the room.

Darkness had been one of the few thing Atsuko had feared when she was younger and even though she claimed to have overcome her fear, she had been reluctant to part with the nightlight. The nightlight was shaped like half a Moon, as the little girl had always loved everything that was related to the sky.

She could spend hours staring at the dark canopy during hot Summer evening. She had started when she was about three and Mei would sit by her, listening to all of the stories Atsuko would make up regarding the stars, until one day she had gathered her little sister in her arms and had started sharing her knowledge of astronomy with her, pointing out the names of constellations and the stories behind them.

She had shared everything she knew, from the science of it, to Japanese mythology pertaining to the skies and when that had been covered, Mei had started telling her sister about ancient Greeks mythology as well. Atsuko would listen to her, head tilted all the way back to look up at the sky and it was during one of these evenings that Mei noticed, for the first time, the look of absolute trust and adoration her sister was honoring her with. On that look, she pledged to never fail Atsuko.

When Mei had spotted the fluorescent stars in a shop, she had bought an inordinate amount of them so that Atsuko would be able to stargaze in her own bedroom, as Tokyo's lights made it impossible to see the stars in their full glory.

Mei had been looking for a lamp that would project constellations about the room but she had yet to find one that was of a satisfactory quality. These thoughts reminded her about her promise to take Atsuko out in the countryside in the Summer, where the constellations shone in all of their splendor. Something to look forward to, if she had been in a different state of mind.

She was more than troubled. She was worn out. Thoughts kept forming in her head, some she managed to dissolve while others had to be shattered. She was unwilling to face what she had acknowledged before. She thought of Atsuko as her own child and it was not fair, not to her, not to Ume and she owed it to the love she and Yuzu shared to be honest to herself and admit that there were things she would never be able to give Yuzu. The feeling of inadequacy she had battled through all of her life had resurfaced and weighed cruelly on her chest.

"Mei…"

She had known Yuzu was there before her lover spoke. She turned to face soft, concerned green eyes and the love within them stunned her. She was not deserving of such love but she could not stop herself from basking in it. Such love was the salvation that had been offered to her and she had always been weak to it. She stopped hugging herself and raised her arm, beckoning Yuzu to come closer.

Yuzu all but stepped into her, leaning against her side, draping her hands upon her shoulder, her lips a whisper away from her cheek.

"Yuzu…" Mei's voiced shaped the name as it always did when they were alone. Playing it out in love and devotion. The most wondrous sound to ever been heard. Yuzu nuzzled her cheek with her nose before warming it with a chuckle.

"I was hoping to join you in the bath." She purred.

"Mmm."

"She is a wonderful sight." Yuzu wrapped her arms around Mei while turning her gaze to the sleeping child. Atsuko slept as Yuzu did, deeply and in the most awkward of positions. One of her hands was firmly gripping the paw of her giant white teddy bear. Yuzu truly wished the child would lose that grabbing habit of hers, her clothes would be much safer if she did.

"… she looks like she could be ours, Yuzu." The words fell from her lips without her permission but what they elicited in Yuzu was completely different from what they had initiated in Mei.

"She does." Mei could hear the smile in Yuzu's voice. "I love how much like you she looks." She truly did. She always had. Thanks to Atsuko, she no longer had to wonder how cute Mei looked as a child. Yet it was not like she discounted Atsuko as being her own person, she knew for all the similarities they shared, her girls were still different in many ways.

Mei clenched her jaw tightly. What right did she have to break Yuzu's happiness with her dark feelings?

"Huh…mmm…socks…" Atsuko's moaning in her sleep captured Mei's attention. Her sister would often talk in her sleep and sometimes she would sound upset as she did now. Had Atsuko been in her arms, Mei would have simply held her tighter and caressed her head, which never failed to settle her down. As it was now, she found herself unable to move.

Fortunately, Yuzu was quick to react and walked into the room to knelt by Atsuko's bed. Yuzu put a gentle hand over the child's head and started to smooth her scowling brow with her thumb.

When Yuzu started to hum the same tune Ume had sung, Mei all but stopped breathing and the beat was stolen from her heart. It was too much. She had to walk away.

She ended up on the balcony, hands holding tightly the railing, keen on letting the breeze calm her down. Mei had never wished more for stars to be visible in the middle of Tokyo. At least the moon was there for her. It was always able to permeate all things. The city lights were no match for its pale glow. She willed herself to remember her small sister's stories over the cosmos. If that could not sooth her mood, nothing would. Nothing except for one person…

"Mei." As expected, Yuzu had walked after her. Now, she was hugging her tightly, resting her face between her shoulder blades. The warmth of her lover's body played as a wonderful contrast to the breeze and Mei felt herself in the middle of the opposing sensations. It was like her whole body was being kissed.

By then, Mei felt safe enough to share what had been agitating her.

"She…" She whispered trusting the night's silence to bring her words to Yuzu. "Atsuko. She just happened to them." Her voice trembled as she felt Yuzu's tighten her embrace.

"They were not trying to— that something so wonderful and precious could just happen to them..."

Mei had always been troubled by the circumstances surrounding Atsuko's birth. Ume and Shou freely admitted that they had not been planning on having another child but were delighted upon receiving the news. Their relaxed attitude to the entire situation filled Mei with an odd sense of dread.

Mei was not prone to anxiety, but the notion that such major life events could be entirely down to chance made her uneasy. What if Atsuko had not been conceived? What if she had never met Yuzu? What if she had gone through with her grandfather's plans for her?

And now her troubles had gained yet another shape, one sharp enough to pierce her heart.

"Yuzu." She spoke the name with remorse. "I will never be able to give you something as beautiful." She felt her eyes growing heavier as tears formed in them. "Something as precious and perfect as her. And I am sor-"

Her heartfelt speech stopped and her face lost the tension of distress to gain the softness of confusion. She felt Yuzu's body tremble against her back, and a muffled laugh tickling her skin.

Surely, Yuzu had finally lost it. The hard truth Mei had just delivered had proven to be too much. Mei turned around, allowing Yuzu to pull back and was greeted by her girlfriend laughing in her face.

"Yu-" Feverish hands raised to her face and she found herself drawn into a breathless kiss. She tasted her lover on her lips and found many other flavors along with love and desire. There was devotion, adoration, tenderness but most shockingly, she could taste Yuzu's happiness.

When they broke apart, Yuzu smiled and quickly kissed her tears away. She loudly pecked her on her swollen lips once again and then moved back to stare at Mei.

"I only hope to remain as happy as I am now for the rest of our life." The honesty in her voice was absolute. "Because I know that I would never be able to be any happier."

"Yuzu... "

"Under no circumstance, Mei." Mei had never been happier about Yuzu interrupting her. "You've never owed me anything. I ask nothing of you but for you to keep being you. I love you, Mei."

Had Yuzu been unable to speak, the ardor in her emerald eyes would have spelled her words more than clearly.

Mei felt the tension being drained from her body and felt light as if floating, her senses overwhelmed by Yuzu's passion. Her love for the woman standing in front of her pulsed through her and drove her into the kind of madness that kept people sane.

"I love you." Mei pulled Yuzu into a fervent kiss, she wanted Yuzu to feel that she had her. All of her. "Yuzu" She whispered stilling her lips for a second. "I love you." She said breathlessly, stopping her kiss, lowering her head to gently close her teeth around Yuzu's collarbone.

Yuzu let out a delighted yelp before moving in to capture Mei's lips again. They kept on kissing each other down the floor and shared everything they had until exhaustion took over. They remained in each other's arms, ignoring the hard floor, continuing to share soft touches and knowing smiles.

"Besides." Yuzu chuckled, her face beaming with satiated desire. "Our little samurai would not take too kindly on sharing us, Mei." Yuzu rested her head on Mei's shoulder. "I don't know if you've noticed, but she is quite the possessive little thing."

Mei chuckled while weaving her fingers with Yuzu. She had noticed. Atsuko did not take well to all of the greedy stares Mei received when they walked hand in hand through the academy.

"She truly thinks I hang the Sun." She wondered in a somewhat amused, awed voice.

"It's the Moon." Yuzu corrected her promptly and it brought a genuine smile on Mei's face.

Yuzu had been paying attention at least.

"Yes." Mei raised her eyes to look at the silver satellite. "The Moon."

End of Chapter 4, AKA:

The one where Mei is a better father.