Kingdom for a Heart
Disclaimer: Bleach owns the Kubo Tite. I mean the other way around. And Sonata Arctica owns the song.
Author's note: Now you will see the Renji invasion. Like it or not. My deepest apologizes.
Warnings: some curse words, unbetadness… Nothing that you aren't used to by far.
Part IV
Abarai Renji sneaked around the Kurosaki house.
It wasn't actually sneaking, pineapple's head argued with his conscience, only some perfectly understandable and completely reasonable inspection. Kurosaki Isshin's flying-knee-kick was the ultimate killer attack, and Renji was not eager to face it in any kind of situation.
Never more. He had once gotten his jaw broken by that monstrous man. Only a thought of the man's fearsome grin gave him chills.
It seemed that at the moment Isshin was at his clinic. Renji rubbed his hands together in the fit of excitement; Kurosaki Yuzu was the best cook ever. From time to time red head lingered his way to the girl's kitchen and, if he was lucky, got some delicious food. Ichigo didn't like it too much, and Shiro even less, but free food was always worth of all discomfort.
Slowly and carefully the freeloader opened the front door. The fact that it was open was more than a bit suspicious.
The shinigami scanned the room with his eyes, searching something that was out of normal. There was some flowers on the floor, right next to the table. A barely audible 'klick' was probably a door closed in somewhere upstairs. At the foot of the stairs stood a man, clenching his fist a way that looked pretty painful.
A clock ticked seconds. Renji felt like he had just stepped on a stopped scene of some really dramatic play.
He picked the flowers up and placed them on the table. The man still didn't seem to notice him. The stranger was facing the stairs, so Renji couldn't see his face.
The redhead couldn't help but feel somewhat awkward. Should he leave? It seemed to be a very intimate event. The shinigami scratched the back of his head and was about to turn around and go somewhere else to beg food when he thought that the man seemed familiar.
From the back you could only see a completely white wardrobe and blue hair. Only person with a blue hair that he remembered was...
"Holy shit!"
Now the man finally turned around. He looked at redheads direction, but wasn't interested at all what the fukutaicho of the sixth division was doing in Ichigo's house. He looked angry, frustrated, tired and completely not-enemious.
The arrancar turned on his heels, put his hands on his pockets and stormed out of the Kurosaki household. Wait, was that sadness in his eyes?
Couple seconds Renji's head just swirled around like he was watching a tennis match. What the hell had just happened? The enemy of the past war had just suddenly popped up and decided to give flowers to Ichigo! World, he thought with growing worry, had gone crazy.
Oh wait. Small wheels turned inside his fruit shaped head when thinking mechanisms were finally beginning to work. This man, Grimmjow, had had some kind of relationship with berry boy lately. Renji wasn't sure about the details; he had heard about the whole deal first time from Yumichika, whit some dramatic effects and tears of affection.
Something bad had happened. You didn't need to be a genius to realise that.
Renji groaned. Why had some higher power sent him to straighten out some stupid love dilemma? Out of all the people in this or in the other world only Kenpachi would be worse choice.
Better go after him. The redhead left the scene and closed the door behind him.
--
Grimmjow had already almost managed to disappear from his sight. The tealhaired man walked fast, but had no destination. With a good run, Renji caught him and took a solid hold of his shoulder. "Hey, what do you think you are doing?"
The expada gave him a dull glare. "Booze."
"Hey Booze. My name is Renji. Now, what the hell are you doing?"
A slight gleam of anger in his eyes and eyebrow ticking from irritation broke the apathetic aura surrounding him. "Your idiotism is so great that isn't even funny. Where can I have fucking alcohol from this town?"
Renji grabbed both of his shoulders and spun him around. "Now you are talking to the right person. Lets take a couple drinks, and the you will tell what is this shit with the berryboy, okay?"
Then other growled, which could have been either approval, disapproval or 'let-go-of-my-shoulder-or-I-will-bite-your-head-off' sound. But because he wasn't too fond of explaining his thoughts and let Renji decide, it was approval.
--
Later on that evening they both discovered the first time that Grimmjow was really heavy drinker. He preferred to empty his cups with one large gulp and immediately ask for a second one.
The espada told Renji, the reasons lost even from himself, the whole story. With his best ability and alcohol dimmed mind the redhead listened and drew his own conclusions about what had happened. His face showed somewhat deep worry, which didn't remain unnoticed by the hollow.
"What, are you gonna scowl me about treating your boyfriend badly? Wanna kill me? It's okay, you ain't first. But as you, I would think twice because you have only one life to waste. Wouldn't wanna use it on me, would ya?" He didn't quite slur, but it wasn't clear speak either.
Have a hole where I should have a heart
I'm made of wood
I'm falling apart
The redhead scratched the side of his nose, looking thoughtful. "That, too. Or he isn't my boyfriend, but otherwise that. But more worried I am about you."
Grimmjow's eyes widened and he leaned a bit backwards, giving impression of taken aback cat of himself. "And how is that?"
"Well, how old are you, for instance?"
The expada had never thought of that. Why would he? He was dead anyway, in a sense. "I don't know. Do you know how old you are? That isn't the most important question when you are fighting for your living in Hueco Mundo which is literally the house of devils."
The fukutaicho nodded, his ponytail thingy making the gesture look ridiculous. "That's exactly what I meant. You are, like, made to be a killer, and now when you are facing the normal relationship things you have no idea what to do. That can't be helped, because there is no lessons how to live a life."
Grimmjow narrowed his eyes. "That's pretty harsh from someone like you. Aren't you a shinigami? Do you have guts to say YOU aren't a trained killer?"
Renji made a face. "Yeah, but those are only hollows. Oops." One glare was better than thousand words. It boosted up the meaning of 'I know you didn't just say that, because that would have been stupid, right?' into it's malicious climax.
"Anyway, the point is, that while we were trained, you were made. No matter what we were studying, we lived a full time life. Meeting friends, laughing and taking everything the world offers to youngsters. We learned how the face hard times, together and privately. You don't know. And when it happens to you first time in a situation as serious as this, you feel like everything is coming to the end. Is that right?"
Grimmjow hesitantly nodded. The bastard knew way too much than was best for him.
"Good. Now, listen carefully, because it doesn't happen everyday that I'm drunk enough to talk about things like this."
Raised eyebrow.
"Well, doesn't happen everyday that there is actually someone who listens to me. I want you to tell me what are you fighting for."
Grimmjow grimaced. "Do I really have to say that aloud? You know, for better tomorrow and stuff like that. The world that should be right is wrong."
"I thought it would be something stupid like that. Listen; don't do anything for a better tomorrow. Ever."
Grimmjow tilted his head. "What do you mean?"
"I mean, that is what is making you go nuts. Morals, justice, right and wrong are very fragile things in the end. One word could shatter or change them completely."
"And for what I should fight for?"
"A personal vendetta is good. For your, for your loved ones. Because you want more money or more power. It doesn't really matter, as long as it's something that remains unchanged and real in good times and bad. When you first start you are liked married with your goals. Never let them go. Because if you manage to build something it will fall down with you."
Grimmjow was thankful. He even smiled, if only a little bit. "Thank you. I promise I will remember those words. I'm gonna make someone proud."
I'm gonna make someone love me. I'm gonna live on with fact that I have made a mistake. I'm gonna apologize and keep fighting. For my own sake, and for your sake.
The words he couldn't say aloud. The most important of words.
A single beam of sunlight wriggled past to the heavy curtains in to the room filled with smoke and laughter.
"Sounds great. You got any money, by the way? Because I don't."