Darkness everywhere
Levi was trying to wake up from unconsciousness but light never reached his eyes. He tried to move, but he felt numb and squeezed. He was tied to a chair and blindfolded. Suddenly he felt a cold metal caressing his cheek, snipping the cloth, revealing the sight of a somewhat familiar face.
"H-Hey, I saw you with Yeager-", then he stopped talking as he heard his own echoes.
"I don't like that guy one bit", she said while chewing on a potato.
"Where am I? What happened?"
"Well, I figured you're a bigot, so I'll save you from yourself. I will educate you. This is why I've brought you to The Chamber of Echoes, where you'll hear the same opinions over and over again. It gets really comfortable after a while"
"N-No! Let me go! Hange needs me!"
"Nice try, but in a world where your identity matters more than your character, there's no way Hange would mess around with someone like you. Now be a tolerant boy and let us proceed. You need to understand that we are in a daily war with hatred and xenophobia and it is our duty as Social Justice Warriors to put an end. I'm going to turn you into the best SJW to fight against Yeager. In order to bring peace to the world we need to start a bloody fight, or more. That's why this titanic religion is the religion of peace and we love it so much"
"I don't know...sounds scary"
Levi was familiar with these kind of goals. He got to see a lot of stuff going on as he was Hange's deplorable man servant..or at least this is how she'd call him. He could never bring himself to agree with most opinions he's heard there, but he was afraid to speak up. Many people who have disagreed with Hange have died 'mysteriously'.
"You know what's scarier? Different opinions! Now, how do we deal with different opinions?"
"We debate them?"
"What the hell? Who told you that? Who the hell told you that debating is the best and the most civilized thing to do? We. Don't. Debate. We. Don't. Engage. In. Dialogue. Ever. Got it?", Sasha was breathing heavily from trigger and was waiting to calm down a bit. "You just need to find a safe space, stick your fingers in your ears and sing 'lalalala' like a little child. Or just block people, ban them, censor them, destroy every lingering possibility of free speech. There's no way the other person could win if we don't give them a chance to begin with. Free speech is good only when we monitor it. Now, what do we do when we need to prove a point? If we have any.."
"We use statistics, logic and facts in order to prove the other person is wrong?"
"No way! The time you use to research boring numbers could be used to protest some police station. Feelings are better than facts! What you need to do actually is to resort to name-calling. If they're white? They're racist. If they're black? They're coons/ white people's pet. If they're straight? They're homophobic. If they're gay? They're self-loathing uncle Toms. If they're male? They're sexists. If they're women? They have internalized misogyny. If they're a titan? You don't f*cking disagree with a titan. There are insults for everybody who disagrees with you. And play the victim card...oh wait...you don't have any in your privileged ass. If an oppressed class disagrees with SJWs then they have their victim cards confiscated. Bringing evidence of bigotry is optional, just cry louder to be convincing"
"You barely make sense...", concluded Levi after being bored to death.
"Oi, don't criticize our ways! This has been working for decades!"
"What's the point of all this? I don't discriminate against anybody"
"If you're saying you are accepting of those who have a different gender, race, religion or sexual orientation, then you refuse to admit that you have some unconscious biases that you need to unlearn, which is exactly why you're a bigot"
"You know what? It was all fun and dandy, but enough is enough. You can't simply throw insults at me and expect me to support your cause. Facts don't care about your feelings. In fact, you can take your opinions and shove them up your ass 'cause they're shit. But unlike you, I was still willing to listen to them and not try to silence you. Are you afraid that I can make sense or why wouldn't you let my voice be heard? YOU MONGOOSE!"
"You Mongoose what? YOU MONGOOSE WHAT? IS THIS SEXUAL HARASSMENT? HEY PEOPLE, THIS PERSON HAS JUST SEXUALLY HARASSED ME!"
A faint 'what the foook' could be heard in the distance.
"DISGUSTING! DISGUSTING! AND NOW YOU'RE POINTING TO YOUR BODY PARTS"
Levi was shocked by her outrage and didn't understand what she was saying. He was freaking tied to a chair.
Then, a group of 3 people that looked like terrorists (but even though they were wearing bomb belts it's not nice to assume that all people who do that plan to destroy something) ran into the room after they heard the yelling.
"Hey, what's going on here?", asked a blonde girl with glacial stare.
"F*CK OFF!", yelled Sasha not being able to overcome the trigger.
A loud gasp could be heard from everybody else's mouth, including Levi.
"Did you just tell a TITAN to f*ck off?"
"WHAAT? I didn't know that girl was a titan! I'm SO sorry! This would have never happened if these people were forced to wear some sort of identification…"
"Why am I hearing loud noises while we're working on the next terrorist attack? And why did you bring this little…like...literally little…piece of garbage? He's a soldier and if he escapes he is going to tell the world about our secret hideout"
"Not if I make him consider the consequences of his privilege and the subtle ways in which his blindness has supported patriarchal oppression"
"You are the definition of indoctrination and you don't even understand what you're saying! Your definition of bigotry is that only a majority can be bigoted because the minorities can't be. Society has failed you and had you thinking only in terms of identity. For you, a person isn't a person, but a label or a number. There was a world before this that has been built by people who weren't obsessing over stuff like this. You will never build anything while thinking like a victim. Humanity will be destroyed by people like you, who think that they're doing good while they divide", said Levi as he was reaching his limit.
The tallest terrorist removed his scarf that was hiding half of his face to spit on Levi.
"Boy, this recruitment is gonna take loong", said Bertolt.
x-x-x-x
Meanwhile up in the sky Eren was trying to figure out how to return to Earth. He absolutely hated the fact that he let Crooked Hange speak without a fight….until he saw her near him.
"How did you end up here?", Eren asked with excitement that neither she could win at the moment.
"You know… the usual. A little bit of coughing, a little bit of seizure…these get to ya."
Eren could see an opportunity in this so he looked around for possible witnesses, then drew a pistol from his back pocket and pointed it at Hange.
"Heh! You think I can't see you with my anti-gun senses? I will delete you like my e-mails!"
Hange bit her finger and turned into a titanic dinosaur…just like her human form, but bigger.
*CHOMP!*
Eren has been bit in half, therefore only his upper body was inside of Hange. He looked like an epic veteran, with blood all over him and smoke from his regenerating skills. He could see her icy heart beating slowly and pointed again his gun at it.
"Hange, you're fired!"
We're interrupting this program to display some disclaimers and advertising from our sponsor
It's hard being triggered all the time. I'm not kidding, for me it's all the time at this point!
I get dressed in the morning - I'm triggered. I take a shower – I'm triggered. I get in the car – I'm triggered. I leave my house - I'm triggered. I sit in my room all day – I'm triggered. I look at my thin beautiful sisters – I'm triggered.
I can't get away from it. People tell me it's because I look like a big fat whale and I should lose weight, but they don't understand that my genetics require me to eat 50 cheeseburgers a day, or was it my thyroid?
To get away from these feelings my friend has recommended me 'Feminism'. Feminism told me I'm beautiful and loved regardless of how I look and I should expect the same treatment as those gym bunnies who work out every day and eat healthy and whoever thinks otherwise, they're fatists.
I'm still a fat ass Miss Piggy, but at least I won't have to pay for 2 tickets for the 2 chairs I sit on (the other person can sit on the floor for all I care), I won't have to worry about health issues because now I've been told that I can be healthy at any size, and if men are too narrow-minded for my wide body I can always go gay for another obese girl that understands my struggles!
x-x-x
A year ago, things started to change…. in my body. I felt different. I felt scared. I went to the doctor, but he said there was nothing wrong, nothing be worried about. He said that I was normal and whatever I had it will go away by itself.
I've never felt so alone, like no one could understand what I was going through. But despite what that doctor said, I took more tests. On the internet. And I spoke to my friends on Tumblr that actually listen and get me! I've also found people who share my story.
I've found out I'm transtitan.
That's when things went wrong. That's when the bullying started, and by that I mean people started asking me questions I knew nothing about. I was a freak.
But I heard about this operation that could remove my genitalia and fulfill my transition. But the National Health Service refuses to fund my essential treatment. They said it was 'dangerous' and 'illegal'. And it's so expensive!
Please help me become who I am and visit my go fund me page /ttntransboi002 !
x-x-x
ERROR 9112001. Transmission hacked by CRISIS
Hey, little stars! Thank you for reading my troll fic! As usual, almost everything is based on real dialogue or real events which footage can be found on Youtube. It may look like exaggeration but I'm just writing what I hear in those videos. Hope you like and recognize the memes and references and that you enjoy reading :D. Let me know how much you loved it by following/fav/reviewing and please bear with me! :D
*Troll song in the background*