Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick.
Steve lay in bed, listening to the alien sound of his standard-issue alarm clock, given to him by SHIELD when he was first instated as an official agent. The damned thing kept waking him up at obscene hours of the morning with its "realistic" digitized clock sounds, and he was growing tired of the lack of sleep. No pun intended. Although he wasn't getting any sleep anyhow, alarm or not.
Everything was different now. Everything had changed. Everywhere he looked, he was surrounded by all sorts of newfangled contraptions, and he couldn't seem to find his place anymore. Society had moved on without him. Life had moved on. Peggy had moved on. And he was left behind. Well, behind, yet ahead. It was mind-boggling. He was lost, an old man in a sea of new.
Tick. Tick.
Irritated by the infernal ticking, Steve looked accusingly towards the source of the noise, a small, flat rectangular box with bright red digits illuminated in the dark. It read three thirty-seven. Much too early to be awake. Even the birds had not yet risen for their daily chorus in welcome of the dawn. With a sigh, he rolled over so he lay flat on his back, head resting on his solitary pillow, and stared at the ceiling. There was nothing to look at up there, nothing to distract him, so it helped lull him to sleep. Usually. Sometimes the monotony couldn't keep his roaming thoughts at bay—it just exacerbated them.
Tick. Tick. Tick.
Steve sat at a crowded, noisy bar with Bucky, drinking a pint. They were chatting with the guys, having a good time, when suddenly a hush fell over the joint. They looked over for the source of the disturbance and saw Peggy entering the bar. She wore black heels and a head-turning red dress with a fitted waist and a very low neckline. Her hair was down in soft finger waves that framed her face. When she spotted Steve and Bucky sitting at the bar, she turned and headed in their direction.
"Captain," she greeted Steve formally. "Agent Carter," Steve said with a respectful nod. Bucky gave a simple "ma'am," then looked her up and down, obviously admiring the way the cut of her dress accentuated her slim waist and full hips.
"Howard needs you at headquarters tomorrow. He has some equipment for you to try," she said softly to Steve. When she turned to look accusingly at Bucky for checking her out, Steve couldn't help but take the opportunity to do his own once-over. His eyes quickly flashed down and back up her form.
When she turned back to look at him, he acknowledged her orders."Of course," he said respectfully.
She gave a quick sweeping glance around the bar, noting the men drinking and singing along raucously to the lively piano. "I see your top squad is prepping for duty," she said with a half-smirk and almost a tone of condescension.
"You don't like music?" Bucky asked her presumptuously.
"No, I do like music, actually," she corrected him, looking at Steve with a soft and almost suggestive smile that Steve didn't pick up on. "I might, when this is all over, even go dancing," she hinted in a playful tone, still looking at Steve
"Then what are we waiting for?"Bucky said coyly, trying in vain to capture Peggy's interest.
"The right partner," Peggy replied with a smile. She had been staring into Steve's eyes the entire time.
"Oh-eight-hundred, Captain," she reminded Steve of his appointment the next morning, then she turned and exited as elegantly as she had come.
"Yes, ma'am, I'll be there," Steve replied, a little late.
"Damn," Bucky shook his head in disbelief. "I'm invisible."
Steve looked at him quizzically.
"I'm turning into you," Bucky explained. "It's like a horrible dream."
"Don't take it so hard; maybe she's got a friend," Steve jested, clapping Bucky on the shoulder.
Steve arrived at the appointed time the next morning at headquarters. He approached a secretary reading the latest newspaper and announced his presence. "Excuse me, I'm looking for Mr. Stark."
The secretary responded without looking up from her paper, "He's in with Colonel Philips." A few seconds later, she tore her glance away from the news and did a double take when she saw Steve standing before her. "Of course, you're welcome to wait here," she said very suggestively. Steve awkwardly nodded his thanks and leaned against the desk opposite hers.
The girl folded the paper back to the front page and spun her chair around, facing Steve. "I uh, heard about what you did," she told him, holding up the front page news, displaying a story about the Captain's act of war heroism.
"Oh. The, uh... yeah. That." Steve nodded and smiled graciously, feeling awkward and out of place with all her attention focussed on him. "Well that's just, you know, just doing what needed to be done," he explained humbly.
"Sounds like more than that; you saved nearly four-hundred men." She smiled at him coyly. He paused, then returned the gesture, feeling slightly confused.
"Really, it's not a big deal," he tried to convince her modestly.
She stood up and sauntered towards him. "Tell that to their wives."
Steve was starting to get a bit twitchy. "Uh, I don't think they were all married..." He shrugged his shoulders nervously, crossing and uncrossing his arms over his chest.
The secretary kept walking forward until there was a mere foot of space between them. "You're a hero," she breathed delicately into his face.
"Well, that-that depends on the definition of-"
She cut him off. "The women of America," she whispered, reaching between his shirt buttons and pulling out his tucked-in tie, "owe you their thanks."
Steve gawked at the girl, completely taken aback. He'd never had a dame put the moves on him before, let alone a real looker like this one. Obviously unsure of how to respond to the girl's ostentatious flirting, he simply backed away slowly, muttering unintelligible excuses under his breath. But she wasn't about to be discouraged quite so easily; she continued her advances on the naive soldier like a she-lion on the prowl, a coy smile playing at the corners of her lips. "And seeing as they're not here..."
Unfortunately for Steve, he had backed himself directly into a corner and she wasn't going to miss her chance at a real famous guy for a change. With nowhere to go, Steve simply stood there, hands raised almost defensively, still blabbering excuses like a fool. But, too late! She grabbed him by the lapels and planted a wet one full on his lips. Not just a chaste little peck, either. It was full-on snogging. There may have even been some tongue involved, though Steve wasn't quite sure. He'd never felt like this before–his mind was in the clouds. He found his arms reaching around the girl's shoulders, seemingly of their own accord, and gently enveloping her in a passionate embrace.
It had all happened so fast, that impromptu kiss. And then, out of the corner of his eye, who should appear, but none other than the Woman herself.
"Captain!" Peggy interrupted loudly. Abruptly Steve sprang away from the secretary, his face bright crimson with embarrassment as he looked into Peggy's stony yet quizzical and, oddly, hurt eyes.
"We're ready for you, if you're not otherwise occupied." Then Peggy about-faced and returned from the direction she came. Ashamed, Steve ran after her. The secretary, on the other hand, had scampered off in the opposite direction with a shy giggle, embarrassed for being caught snogging Captain America by her superior.
"Agent Carter, wait," he begged. Peggy stopped abruptly and turned to face him once more with a fierce glare. He stopped a yard away, giving her a pleading look.
"Um…" he had tried to explain the situation, but the words just wouldn't come. So Peggy interjected. "Looks like finding the right partner wasn't that hard after all," she spat.
"Peggy, that's not what you think it was."
"I don't think anything, Captain," she said with disdain. "You wanted to be a soldier, and now you are. And you're getting the perks that come along with it."
"Well, hold on, how do I know that you and Stark haven't been… fonduing?" he accused desperately.
Peggy paused, shaking her head in disbelief. "You still don't know a bloody thing about women." Then she turned on her heel and stormed off.
Steve stood there for a few minutes, utterly confused as to what had just happened. All he knew was that his feelings for Peggy were not subsiding; if anything, they were growing exponentially each time he saw her. But now, after that stunt he just pulled, he might have just blown his chances.
Steve lay in bed, not really sleeping, yet not really awake, until precisely five thirty-five in the morning, when his alarm went off. He immediately arose and headed down to the gym, where he began his daily exercise ritual. Exercising was one of the few times when Steve felt truly normal. Well, as normal as a super-soldier could ever possibly feel. He revelled in the way his muscles felt when he pushed himself to his physical limit. He still never failed to surprise himself with the amount of sheer power contained in his own body.
But it also served as a constant reminder of the life he once had; life before the experiment; life before the military; life before Peggy. And that was something he'd never really get over. There would always be those little reminders wherever he went, bringing back thoughts of what once was, what could have been, and what never will be.
Tick. Tick. Tick. Tick...