Tana
It's doubly dangerous when they're both watching– my brother and Ephraim. When Ephraim watches I want to fly boldly, perfectly, so he can see what I can do in the skies, so he knows that I, too, have learned to wield a lance and hold my own. When Innes watches I want to drive Achaeus on to make dangerous manoeuvres– quick turns, dizzying spirals– all to show him that I can, that I am as capable as he and needn't be coddled any longer. Is it wrong to want their approval as much as their affection?
I don't think Ephraim took much note of me until I flew by his side in the war. And even then I had to prove myself useful, show him I was capable. His mind was always on the battle, but even then all I really wanted was to be close to him, to talk with him. Things are different now and I have to grip Achaeus's reins and breathe in the crisp air to not get dizzy when I think of the taste of his lips, of how strong his arms were when he wrapped me in his embrace.
He talks to me now, notices me; he's attentive and kind. But when he watches me fly I can see in his eyes a kind of spark and I want to see it when I'm on the ground as well.
I bank and have Achaeus circle around low over the castle so I can peer down into the courtyard. Eirika and Sir Seth are sparring. From high above it looks almost as if they're dancing. I know they love each other. I'm certain of it, though Eirika's never spoken a word about it. But it's clear to me from the way she looks at him, the way she smiles at him and flushes when he speaks to her. She never does that when she speaks to the others, to Sir Forde or Sir Kyle or– heaven forbid– to Innes. Sir Seth is more difficult to read. I don't know him well enough to see past his mask of formality. He's always so cordial, but also... cold somehow– like his namesake, beautiful, but chill to the touch. But I think... I think Eirika is able to reach past that somehow to whatever warmth there is beneath that silvery sheen.
Ephraim is watching me again from down on the battlements and I send Achaeus into a sharp spiral, gripping his reins until my knuckles are white, squeezing his sides until my legs ache. The wind whistles around me, whips past my cheeks and through my hair and I feel truly and completely alive.
Watch me, Ephraim. I'm no longer the timid little girl trailing after you. I can fly as high now, shine as bright. Let me be the star in your sky. Please, Ephraim. See me.