The following day, Doug was excited to go meet Hanson again. When Clavo went on the school bus early morning, Doug went out too to locate Hanson by ordering a taxi. Although it was early morning he didn't care and didn't think Tom cared either. He should feel desperate to see his face again since yesterday as he was.
He excitedly knocked on door, number 22. … The door opened and he saw Mrs Simon, "oh it's you" she said unenthusiastically.
"Can I see Tom?" Doug asked.
"A little early don't you think?" she sneered.
Doug turned his head and saw his taxi drove off "I can't turn back now…" he stated.
Simon saw this too and from her face, she looked like she gave up. "Ok… Thomas is in the living room" she said. She let Doug step in the house and led him into the living room. He found Tom sitting in his wheelchair at a table having breakfast. Tom dropped his slice of toast in surprise when he saw his friend standing there.
"Hey Doug!" he greeted. He used his hands to wheel back apart from table.
"Hey, good to see you again" Doug greeted back walking towards his friend. Mrs Simon stepped out of the room.
"I was afraid you wouldn't see me again, really" Tom said surprised.
"You noob, I promised!" Doug laughed.
Tom smiled ever so faintly. Doug looked at three uneaten pieces of toast "mmm" he said ravenously, feeling his stomach beg for hunger. He was too excited to meet Tom to eat this morning.
"You can have it if you like" Tom offered.
"You sure? Thanks" Doug replied and picked up a piece of toast to eat.
It was ok between them to steal each other's food. They always used to do it…well, mainly Doug because he had always had bigger appetite than Tom. Doug savoured the buttered toast "mmm…" he expressed.
Tom laughed "you make me realise how much I missed you!" he said.
"What? I'm hungry!" Doug joked. He looked at what Tom was wearing, a black shirt that had 'Top Gun' titled across it which is from a movie. Then he saw he was wearing pyjama like trousers. It was loose fitting but he could still see Tom's legs were sitting limply on the wheelchair rest. He shuddered. He quickly looked away before Tom saw where he was looking. "Mrs Simon isn't very nice" he said quietly to break the silence.
"I'm used to it though but yeah I do hate her most of the time. I wanted my mom to look after me but she refused, saying I'll be too much of a handful" Tom replied darkly.
"Oh…sorry" Doug apologised.
"I had too many sorry's these past months so stop saying it" Tom said icily.
"Ok…" Doug replied softly.
Tom shot him a glare then turned away with a big sigh.
Doug hated when Tom changed his moods, it was annoying but also scary of how unexpected it changed. "I'm gonna use the toilet. I'll be back" Doug excused. He did need the toilet but also thought it would be good to step out of the room so Tom could collect himself together.
Tom leaned back heavily in his seat feeling miserable and guilty for snapping at his friend. He couldn't help it, he couldn't stop himself either. He just felt sick and helpless.
He shifted uncomfortably in his chair. His back was beginning to ache. He usually asked Mrs Simon to help him out to rest on the couch but he couldn't do that when Doug is around… it would be embarrassing. …Not being able to do a simple task for oneself. He could do it himself. He could… how hard can it be? He wheeled himself a bit closer to the couch to make it easier. His heart was pounding against his chest and his hands were shaking but he tried to ignore it. Pushing down both hands on the hand rests of his wheelchair he lifted all his weight forward to get on the couch… He gasped and cried out when his hand slipped off the hand rest and he slumped down onto the floor next to the couch… "Oh god…" Tom cried helplessly. He pushed himself up with both arms but his legs were heavy on him and he wasn't getting anywhere. He grabbed hold of the couch seat trying to lift himself up again. He fell back down helplessly when he knew he wasn't going to get anywhere at all.
Doug came back into the room and saw Tom's chair was empty… he wondered if Simon had took him somewhere or something but then he saw a figure slumped on the ground beside it face forward… His heart hammered against his chest in panic thinking Tom had hurt himself.
"Tommy?" he called, kneeling down beside him.
He heard Tom's quiet little sobs and his back moved with each of it. "Oh Tom…" Doug said softly putting his hand on his back. Tears filled Doug's eyes but he blinked it away. This was bad. Tom was helpless.
"I…I can't do it!" Tom cried.
"Can't do what?" Doug asked softly.
"I…I tried to get myself on the couch…" Tom replied.
"I'll help you" Doug offered. He put his arms under Tom's and with his strength, lifted Tom up and onto the couch. He surprisingly light but maybe Doug couldn't tell because he was muscly from working out. He saw Tom's face wet with tears "I only wanted to do some simple task and I failed…" he sniffed "I'm so helpless… a damn fish" he scowled looking down at his limp legs.
His heart and gut ached for Tom. He should of have deserved this… Tom would have to live with it for the rest of his life with no cure… He felt like embracing Tom in his arms and protect him from the darkness of this world…make him happy again.
"Did you hurt yourself?" Doug asked. Tom shook his head no. Doug sighed in relief and went to sit next to Tom "you could of asked me to do it" he said.
"I wanted to do it myself for once" Tom replied "I'm sick of being incapable of moving around like some rag doll".
"I know" Doug said softly.
Tom sat back with a sigh. After a few minutes of silence, he spoke again, "have you seen Judy and Harry and all that lot recently?" he asked.
"No, I lost contact, I mean separate ways. I still have their numbers though" Doug replied.
"Why did you?" Tom asked, surprised. He thought he was the only lost contact.
"I left Jump Street not long after you, to look after Clavo" Doug replied.
"Things…do change a lot don't they?" Tom muttered "I mean you never know, Harry or Judy could be dead"
"Or they could be married and have kids" Doug joked, to give Tom a thought on the bright side.
"Oh man, I hope Judy isn't married. I've always wanted her to be single!" Tom joked.
Doug nudged Tom playfully "me too!"
"Could Jump Street still be standing?" Tom questioned.
"I'm not sure. It is a very old building. Last time I saw it, the walls were beginning to crack and the unit…quite possibly still around, I don't know" Doug answered. Doug shifted to get more comfortable but felt something hidden inside the couch. He took the object out and found it was a bottle of alcohol nearly half full "whoa" he said in surprise. Tom took it from Doug's hand "it's mine"
"So…you drink now do you?" Doug questioned, sounding disappointed. He knows many people drink to solve their problems but it just doesn't.
"Yeah got a problem with that?" Tom said… McQuaidly. He opened the bottle cap, raised the bottle to his lips then drank it down. He closed his eyes as the drink burned down his throat. When Doug thought it was enough he took the bottle away "stop that!"
Tom wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and laughed foolishly "you're the responsible one now". He meant, back then Tom was always the responsible one when it came to difficult situations, the smart one but now he was into drinking and Tom Hanson doesn't drink. Doug shook his head, smiling at his friend. "But why drink?" he asked.
"Takes the pain away…inside I mean" he said.
In the past he knew Tom didn't drink much, didn't smoke either. "Do you smoke?" Doug asked.
"What are you, Mrs Simon?" Tom sneered "but yeah, sometimes. Wouldn't you if you were in my shoes? Hmf, I don't think you would even what to imagine it!" he tried to joke.
"Stop saying those things…" Doug said quietly.
"What am I supposed to say? Every day is freaking shit" Tom said bitterly.
"Well it hurts to hear it" Doug scolded.
"But I can't tell this to anyone! When I meet people if I'm lucky, I have to pretend I'm all happy when I'm not" Tom said "like when I was back at Jump Street when I was hurting, I pretended I was ok, faking laughs, faking smiles…" he mumbled.
"I don't want you hurting like this" Doug insisted "I never did" he added, thinking back Jump Street.
"I know… but there's one good thing…that you're back. It gives me hope. You're special to me because you never seem to give up on me. You're something in my past I can still have. You're the only person who I really know who cares about me now…" Tom said, eyes glittering "and when I saw you again yesterday my fake laughs and smiles were real for the first time in years…"
Mrs Simon came into the room, "what the hell is this?" yelled seeing the bottle of alcohol. It must have looked like Doug had bought alcohol with him.
"It's… mine" Tom admitted.
"I thought so!" she grabbed the bottle of alcohol off Doug who looked stunned by her actions. "You were drinking behind my back?" she asked Tom angrily.
"Yeah, because I know you would take it off me!" Tom shouted.
Doug winced, this was serious.
"And that's exactly what I'm going to do!" she shouted back. "You should go" she told Doug. She left the room probably to get rid of the alcohol.
"I need to go out and buy some again" Tom mumbled since Mrs Simon stole it away from him. She seemed to want everything perfect and treats the home like it was hers. Made it her style too…
It's wasn't fair It was his own body and he wasn't a kid.
"Where are you going to hide it this time?" Doug grinned.
"Good question" Tom mumbled. "Could you come with me to get another bottle?" he asked.
"Tomorrow... It's best I'll go because that scary woman might kill me" Doug joked.
Doug helped put on Tom's coat and they went outside in the biting cold. Tom took out his fingerless gloves out of his pocket and put it on then took hold of the wheels himself to push himself along. "How long are you going to be with me today?" Tom asked.
"All day if you like. I have work starting soon, I had a little time off" Doug replied.
"You still work undercover right?" Tom asked.
"Yeah, not yet though. Waiting for a case to pop up" Doug replied.
"Yeah, I know the feeling…"
They were going down the street now. Doug was walking a slow pace Tom was at. They chatted about Jump Street, how fun it was together and being their favourite cover, the McQuaid brothers. They were good times and the memories of it seemed…colourful, really to life like childhood memories.
Walking down just three streets, Tom seemed to be out of breath. He wheezed and sweat managed to bead on his forehead despite the cold air. "I'm…sorry, I can't… go on anymore" Tom said breathlessly.
Doug took hold of the handles and pushed Tom himself.
Tom arms were aching and really tired. However his heart and breathing was not, they were fast paced, rapid. "I don't know why, I seem to get tired within just three streets. Out of breath easily… Got so bad I stopped going to exercise training the doctors offered. They just said I was lazy" Tom explained.
Doug thought it was ridiculous, how could they think he was lazy? He looked exhausted before him! He thought people weren't very nice to him, like Mrs Simon, for example. Doug put his hand round Tom's thin arm "you have no muscle" he said.
"I know that" Tom replied, shrugging out of Doug's hold "I told you, I get out of breath easily, I can't work out" he said.
Doug looked down at Tom's skinny frame that worried him. He wondered Tom was slow because he had no energy from not eating much. He didn't tell Tom this though, maybe another time.
They were down the busy street then Tom motioned to a liquor store. "Think you can get it for me? I can't fit the chair through the door…" Tom asked pleadingly.
Tom was right, he couldn't because there was a door wide enough for a person to walk through, not a wheelchair. Tom gave Doug money. Doug looked down at the money in his hand, unsure what the hell he was doing "ok… but a small bottle" he said. Tom was about to protest but Doug went in the store. He thought it was stupid that Tom drank but bought it anyway because he didn't want to let him down.
When he came back out he saw Tom was nervously looking at the people's faces. "Here" Doug hanged the bag on Tom's wheelchair handle.
"Thanks…" Tom thanked, looking far away.
"What's wrong?" Doug asked of Tom's behaviour.
"Nothing…I just want to go home" Tom replied quietly.
"Ok…" Doug replied. Doug knew something was wrong or something happened because Tom was silent throughout the journey back home. "What happened?" Doug asked suddenly breaking the silence. "Nothing" Tom replied again. Doug sighed and left it. He wasn't going to push him.
Tom had a sudden thought while waiting outside of the liquor store; he had a sudden thought that someone would be out to get him, to harm him. He didn't know who shot him and he must be still out there, waiting for him…to finish his job. His eyes wondered with fear to the next person the next. He clutched at his coat in anxiety. Thank god Doug came back. He felt so afraid alone.