"Doctor!" River had jumped up and was now tugging at his arm, "we need to get after her!"
"Oi! I'm getting up." He stood up and then looked at River, 'oi' was something Amy would say.
"We'll worry and cry about my parents later," she was urging him over to the shaft, "but right now we have to find Clara...if we ever want to know exactly what happened." She was about to jump in when The Doctor snapped.
"River!" He grabbed her elbow and pulled her back. Opening one of his arms he said, "together or not at all."
"You have really got to stop with the Amy and Rory references," she sighed and wrapped her arms around his waist, "it's really quite sad and I can't do sad right now." She knew she couldn't. Never let him see the damage. She figured when it came to her parents it really was acceptable, but with how hard he had taken it...how distraught he had been, she didn't think she could be upset about it. What he never knew was that that night she had cried herself to sleep. Being half human she needed more sleep than he did, she also had not been feeling well, come to find out later she knew why. It shouldn't have been such a surprise, but it kind of was. But enough of that now. Now was not the time to think about that, they had something to accomplish. When she regained her composure she noticed that they were almost to the ground of the other level, had she really missed that much? Apparently. She didn't even remember jumping in the shaft.
"Sorry." The Doctor apologized as their feet touched solid ground again. "I don't mean to be such a downer, but it's been awhile, and not a day goes by that I don't miss them." He smiled and gave a faint laugh, "even crazy Rory. He was always so self-conscious about how Amy felt...as if she had eyes for anyone else." He looked around them. "I think we need to go this way." He was pointing the direction that River was facing.
"We'll probably run a lot faster if we're not holding onto each other." He told River who was still holding onto him without realizing it.
"Right," she dropped her arms and started to walk in the direction that he had been pointing.
"I said 'run' for a reason, River." He grabbed her hand and took off on a sprint pulling River along behind him. Once she finally started running it wasn't quite so difficult to stay together. The Doctor always liked to think they were an unbeatable team, that no one would win against them; but there would always be someone. There would always be someone looking to destroy them, it's why they'd never made their marriage public. The only people that even knew they were married was a very small number: Amy and Rory (obviously since they were there, they were her parents, and they had to give their consent); Vastra, Jenny and Strax; and now Clara knew, but that was as far as it went. He'd never forgive himself if something happened to River because someone found out who she was married to. He would hate himself forever if he caused her anymore pain.
River was tough though, he knew that sometimes she wasn't as tough as she claimed to be, she'd cried herself to sleep the night that her parents "died." She didn't think he knew, but he did. He sat outside of their bedroom door and cried himself, but he didn't know what he should do. She obviously didn't want him to see her crying so he couldn't just waltz in there and expect her to continue crying. Sometimes he wished she wouldn't try to be so strong all the time. Granted, he was more proud of her than he'd ever admit to anyone, but sometimes he just wanted her to be a little less strong. She always knew what to say and what to do, but he'd have liked for just once...if she'd come to him and crumpled up in his arms...he wanted to feel needed. Oh, he knew that he was, it was kind of like saying "I love you"...they didn't have to. While most people just threw around the word "love" like it had no real meaning or significance is part of the reason why he'd never used that word before, not in this regeneration at least. He loved River, and she knew that. She didn't need him to say goodbye to signify that he loved her, though he was absolutely content doing that, because he knew if she'd have asked him to tell her that he loved her, he probably would have done it...but she knew he wasn't comfortable with it, so she'd instead asked for an act of love. A simple goodbye that had been denied her in this very place all those years ago...in the future. River had died in the future, though she was in his future and he was in her past and all this wibbly wobbly timey wimey stuff that surrounded the two of them was unlike any other, but he'd never have it any other way.
He would do just about anything for that woman, though he'd never tell her that. He'd follow her to the end of the galaxy and back. She never dragged him into anything...well, more or less. She always made things interesting, and interesting things were hard to say no to. Just remembering when he rescued her after she jumped out of a spaceship back when they encountered the Weeping Angels at the Byzantium. That had been quite the adventure indeed. He'd know that River was his wife, he'd just chosen to ignore it. Tried to shove it as far back in his mind as he could...because he knew the sooner he fell in love with her the sooner he'd have to lose her, and he wasn't okay with that.
However, looking back now, how had that even happened? He seriously wondered, how could she possibly have survived? They were getting closer to the data core now when they heard The Doctor's Tenth incarnation coming towards them so they ducked behind some oddly located book racks. From that position they could see the mysterious Clara, who was doing the exact same thing that they were, except she had a smile on her face.
"I may have been born to save The Doctor," she stood up, "but in this instance, it's much more important that I save her." She sighed and looked around checking for anyone else upon seeing no one she crept around another section of books and pulled a gurney like table after her. To both The Doctor's surprise and River's surprise it was River laying on that bed.
The Doctor and River shared a brief glance before refocusing all their attention on this other version of Clara.
"Now, River," Clara was stroking her cheek, "what you did was incredible. It's almost as if he expects us to save him...I guess that's what makes us special, we're always willing to do it. Why I remember what I do now...I don't know, but I do know that he needs you. I don't think he realizes just how much he needs you." She turned around and pushed the gurney up against the wall then sat on it and picked up River's hand to hold it in hers. "He's kind of like a lost puppy dog. You mean so much to him, and I don't know how you can tell...but it's all there. All of it. He never talked about you like that, you were - I guess are - his wife. He didn't tell me that, well he did, but he didn't mean to. When he did talk about you - as Professor Song - there was such an admiration in his voice...in the way he talked about you. And I'm sorry but I definitely pictured an old man, not a beautiful woman, who The Doctor clearly has not let himself mourn.
"He thinks he saved you to the data core, and I guess that's what he needs to think...I don't think he'd be able to stand this right now...especially not the future him. He needs help." She laughed and River smiled at The Doctor who quickly dismissed her. "But he always takes care of everyone. He doesn't like letting other people take care of him though, and he hates it when people die in his place. He may be an alien, but he has the heart and soul of a human being...and he loves us lowly humans, in ways we will probably never understand, but he always insists we're worth it."
The Doctor wasn't sure if he was liking what Clara was telling the unconscious River or not. She seemed to be praising him and critiquing him at the same time. He already had a lot of respect for this Clara, and he wasn't even entirely sure what it was she had done, but she had his wife by her side, and if she's the one who gives him another chance with the River by his side, then that was all that really mattered...but how had she done it?
"Bet you're wondering why you aren't dead..." she moved some of River's hair off of her face before continuing, "well it's kind of complicated, well it's going to sound more complicated than it actually is, so listen up." She straightened herself and covered River with the blanket she had placed on the gurney.
"Well, during your act of insanity," she laughed, "yep that is definitely what I'm calling it, and you can't disagree, so it is decided." She very characteristically Clara nodded. "Anyways," she continued, "during your act of insanity and The Doctor about dying of emotional pain - we're gonna say his 'someone is dying for me, I'm not worth it' hullabaloo - I snuck in and pulled you out of there. Your mind is a little wonky right now, but you'll be alright. I know you'll be alright. As long as he needs you, I don't think you should ever be gone. Which means you'll pretty much have to outlive him, you got that?" she looked at River and concluded, "right, good. Glad we got that little bit of business sorted.
"I guess I should keep explaining," she nodded, "yup. After I pulled you out, I took your place. I actually got the brunt of it, but that's okay. He needs you, and he hasn't even met this version of me, so he'll have nothing to miss." She was right. If he didn't even know she was there or what she had done, then things were fine. And dying on behalf of River seemed like a more than acceptable thing. She was split into millions of 'echoes' as the River in the tomb had put it, and she knew that if The Doctor needed his River, then bloody hell, he was going to have her.
"He would probably scold me for this, so I guess it's a good thing that he doesn't know about it. River, I don't understand why you mean so much to him, and I wish I could pick apart your brain to find out, but I suppose that is unlikely, well I could, but it would be wrong." She sighed, she wasn't sure if River could even hear her, but she thought at least attempting to fill her in would be important.
"If only you could have seen his face after that conference call..." she inhaled and exhaled deeply as a tear slid down her face, "I'd never seen him so broken. He's gotten more happy, I guess you could say happy, lately...but then it was like nothing good had ever happened. He looked absolutely heartbroken. He'd agreed that you were an 'ex' but I thought it was odd that he would be crying over an ex...but he was. And I don't know how he ever gained his composure, but he did and then rushed out.
"You know what he said about you? He said, 'River would know though. River always knew.' I've gotta tell you River, he seemed so certain of that, so without question that you would know. I knew he was right, but I couldn't convince myself to agree with him. Then again, given the fact that he had been crying moments before I didn't think it would be fair to him or to myself, so I said nothing." She resituated herself so that she was sitting more comfortably. "I don't know how he functioned without you, to be honest." She thought back to the tomb, "you know, when we were in his tomb I knew that I needed to save you, because in a sense it would save him..." she chuckled, "so I kind of aimed for this moment, so it'll probably be the only moment of my lives that I'll remember. You told me about this, about the Library, and..." she paused, "I had to do my part. I had to save you."
She stood up, gently placing Rivers hand down at her side, "in the end it was easy. It was an easy decision to come here and save you. Right now, you're, well you're basically in a coma...that's why you think you're in the data core and why that conference call worked, Vastra had said 'time travel has always been possible in dreams,' voila you are dreaming. I don't know when you'll wake up...or sadly, if you'll wake up, but River you've got to. I'm dying, so I won't be here much longer, not in this life anyways, but it was all worth it. Wish I could see the look on his face, or at least remember this time just enough that it makes me happy...then again, he's probably gonna take awhile to even realize it's you," she laughed, "he's funny that way."
Clara lifted River's hand. "Your Vortex Manipulator, well I kinda took it from your pack, but here it is, safe and sound, I've half a mind to keep it and spend my last hours wherever I want...but I won't do that." She knew that if River did come out of this, then she'd need some way to find The Doctor, and this was probably her best shot. Oh sure, River could call him, but from what Clara understood, River would never make a "hello-I'm-not-dead!" kind of appearance over the phone. She's too good for that. She'd wanna make it a loud comeback, she'd want to be in that bloody TARDIS, and being who The Doctor is, he'll probably miss her and just pass her off as a trick or a memory. She laughed at that.
"Oh River..." she looked helplessly down at the woman with the funny name and the space hair. The woman that The Doctor loved, probably in spite of himself. She couldn't imagine what it must have been like for him...all those years to fall in love with her, and all the while knowing that she was going to come here and die. "I couldn't do it. But I guess that shows just how much he loves you...he saw you die River, he could have changed any of that future if he'd wanted to...but he fell in love with you." She smiled. "I didn't even know he could feel, he just seemed so together all the time...but then one mention of your name, and he's like a little schoolboy who's just come home from being bullied...all broken and hurting. And probably thinking to himself that he'll never love again..."
She looked around, "your love, it transcends space and time. He talked briefly about Amy and Rory and how much they loved each other, and how he's always been envious of that...but River, I think his love story with you if far more beautiful and precious...while I was hooked up to the data core, I was able to relive your memories...that man was head over heels for you, absolutely bonkers for you. He'd sail to one end of the galaxy and back if he knew it would make you happy. He would die a thousand deaths, just to make sure you wouldn't have to face one. I know this, because I know him, and this is how he thinks...all in or all out. He never gives half, he gives his all..." she paused reflecting on it. Wondering what that might have been like if she'd been in River's shoes, though she knew it would probably never be the same. She was feisty and smartarsed, and sassy as hell. Everything she did was partially done just to irritate him, but there was something about that he found sexy. He'd never let an Angel get anywhere near her. Never, ever. No one else is going to take her away from him. Not ever.
River leaned her head on The Doctors shoulder, wishing that she had heard all of this at that time, she'd only heard the last bit, which Clara hadn't even gotten to yet, she was glad to know what context it was in now. As The Doctor leaned his head on hers she looked up and smiled, then she laid a soft and gentle kiss on his cheek. Clara had pegged him perfectly. River realized that Clara was probably the only person that could have picked up on that much...her mother hadn't even understood it, sure she'd been thrilled, well more or less she wasn't thrilled about being his mother-in-law, but knowing River had him, and he had River seemed to bring Amy a lot of comfort.
As The Doctor listened to everything that Clara was saying he realized just how see through he may have actually been. Had he really been as vulnerable as all that? He supposed that he could probably trust Clara with just about everything now based on this one encounter...and she didn't even know they were there...but would she have changed what she was saying if she did know that? He didn't want to test that theory, so far, he was loving Clara's commentary to River, it was beautiful and to have his River sitting beside him with her head on his should, made him all the more grateful for Clara's presence in his life. The Impossible Girl had done something wonderful...she'd saved his hearts.
"You know River," a silent tear sliding down her face, "you are beautifully tragic...you and The Doctor. I do believe you would die all over again to save him, but do something for me...and don't. I came into this time stream to save him...so as far as it depends on you...don't be the hero..." she sighed, "he needs you far too much." The River on the cot stirred. "You two are absolutely perfect together, and if all you hear from this, very one-sided conversation," she shrugged, "then remember this..."
"Whatever you do," River joined in, "don't ever let him go, and don't you ever keep the truth from him. He loves you, and even though you want to be strong...sometimes you need to fall into his arms and let him catch you. He'll say he doesn't need to know, but River, he does. He likes to feel needed, so let him be needed. And love him, whatever else you do, love him, and don't you dare let go."
As he sat there listening to the two of them he began to realize he didn't deserve either one of them, and he never wanted to let them go. He did need them, and he was going to make sure that they knew that.