...lissen, my squad ain't small, what nonsense you on about? 's just big enough, an' we like it the way it is. Less names 'n faces to remember, 'n all that.
Okay, okay, maybe there's a reason there's just five of us. Y'see, here's the thing. We don't have a name. People hear about Barker's ACEs, or Torsson's Stormbreakers, an' they think, "Fuck, I wanna be one of 'em". Name matters, an' we don't have one, we's just Nosedive or Goat's squad, or even "that group of sorry bums", an' who d'you think wants to be called a bum? No one, that's who.
Okay, okay, I see you ain't too convinced. You got me. Here's the thing: to become a Pilot, ya have to be good, and they make sure you know it, right? So new Pilots, they're always a bit cocky, like they feel the world's at their feet now that they have their own steel-and-chrome friend ready to fight at their side. Hell, I was like that too, back then, so's not like I'm blamin' them. Point is, when you're like that, y'only want to be wi' the best. An'… it's not like we ain't good, but we ain't the best either, you know? People wanna be like them Six-Fours, who're remembered as the best o' the best, while us… did you know that once me 'n Heartlock, breaking mission parameters who'd been very carefully made clear to us, managed to pilfer an IMC battleship, but we didn't get th' landing quite right an' ended up on Briggs' command tent? You don't hear of Gates messin' it like that, do you?
An' there's also the fact that we ain't exactly the friendliest bunch. Well, yes, I'm friendly with you, but only 'cause you buy me t' drink, you hear me? Don't get weird ideas. Nosedive 'specially, he has an hard time trusting people. Hehe, I remember when our two newest members joined. Shindig 'n Haywire, their name was. Well, still is, 'less they decided world ain't worthy of them anymore since I last saw 'em this mornin'. Briggs herself sent 'em to us, if you can believe it. She'd probably had enough of our shenanigans, you know, an' even we couldn't refuse a direct order from th' lady.
Anyway, 's early morning, an' the two lads come t' our bunk, while we's sitting outside playin' cards. An' Shindig, he starts introducing himself, sayin' how he graduated at some 'cademy an' he's proud of bein' here an' he can't wait to get to know us. An' then comes Haywire's turn, an' he does the same, right? Acting all well-mannered, like he's introducing himself to her lover's dad or somethin'. Now, picture the scene: these guys're talkin' an' we's just playing cards, paying 'em no heed at all. An' as they's done talkin', we jus' keep playing, an' they start looking confused, Shindig looks at Haywire who just shrugs, as dumbfounded as he was. Then our game's over, an' Nosedive, who lost, he turns 'round an' fixes his eyes on the both of them, loadin' his stare with as much contempt as 'twas humanly possible, an' after a good ten seconds which I assume were very uncomfortable for the lads, he says, an' I kid you not, "What're you, some kind of fucks?"
An' me 'n Heartlock, we just burst out laughin' an' we couldn't stop. I swear my belly was achin' and I had tears in me eyes, an' I'm sure the same's true for Heartlock as well. An' Nosedive's just staring at 'em like he's 'spectin an answer, an the poor lads, they're there with a stunned look 'n their face, stammerin' as they're tryin' to come up with one, but what the fuck's they 'sposed to say? Anyway, I then took pity on 'em, at least once I was done laughin', an' I suggested not to take it th' wrong way. Which I probably would have in their stead. First thing I'd do would be punch Nosedive in the throat for his lack of 'spect. Luckily for all parts 'nvolved, they didn't do that. Plus, we soon found out that they'd gone though trainin' with our the same drill sarge we had, and anyone comes out still standin' after ninety days wi' him, he deserves at least an ounce of respect. Riven Rock — Riven's his actual first name, 'f you can believe it. His ma must've had a proper sense of humor, ha. Anyways, the man was the meanest bastard ever been drillin' soldiers. Granted, 's thanks to him if I'm still here takin' names, y'know? Can't say he did much for me stayin' sober or out o' trouble though.
He also had this habit of givin' every soldier under 'is tender care a made-up name, which just explains th' stupid nicknames Shindig and Haywire got, y'know? An' there's a reason for 'em, usually, though I never were really able t' figure out some of them. Like Shindig! Guy 's a name like that, you'd 'spect him to be one never to turn down a bottle of rum come straight from the inner rim, right? But no, don't get me wrong, Shindig's a fine enough fellow, but he ain't exactly the partyin' type, unlike yours truly. I even went an' asked the lad 'bout his name, an' he was like, "I dunno." How even… at times I wonder if you young'uns have it all right 'n the head, y'know? There's bein' distracted and there's not knowin' what your own damn name stands for. I know what my name stands for, an' with the alcol I been drinkin', I shouldn' even remember which way's left an' which is right. What's that? You wants t'know 'bout my name? Oh nossir, I ain't tellin'.