To what bdsproductions asked, I agree with it being slightly creepy, and I was going to have Rufus be Willy Wonka. I don't think he'd actually do that, and I'm scared of what he'd do to me if I tried, so maybe it was Hojo? You now, have him as director and actor. (Shudder) That's creepy too.

Wolf: This is based on somethis that actually happened to me. Witha friend.Wooden spoon and all.

Reno: Coooooookieeees!

Disclaimer: I do not own FFVII

"Cookies?" Reno stuck his head through the kitchen door. Elena glanced over her shoulder at him and shook her head.

"Not yet. I'm still making the dough."

Reno walked casually next to her and leaned on the counter. Elena had already added and mixed all the ingredients.

"You'll be done soon?"

"Half an hour. Now get out, you're in the way." Elena turned to set the oven and Reno grabbed a spoonful of the cookie dough.

"RENO!" Elena grabbed a wooden spoon of the counter and brandished it at Reno. "Get out!"

"Awright, it's just a little-wait! What are you doin' with that?" Reno backed towards the door as Elena advanced on him with the wooden spoon raised.

"I told you to get out, but you just had to eat the cookie dough." Reno jumped back, dodging Elena's swing by inches. "Now you won't get any!"

"Help!" Reno ducked under her next attack and ran for the door. "Elena's gone crazy! Again!"

Rufus looked up from the couch as Reno sprinted through the room. Elena followed a few minutes later, still swinging the spoon. She paused at the base of the stairs and shouted, "Now let me make the cookies in peace!"

Rufus turned back to the newspaper as Elena stalked back into the kitchen, muttering death wishes on Reno. He shook his head and turned a page. "He's going to get himself killed."

----

"Ok, you know the plan?" Reno looked at the other two men.

Rude sighed, "Why are we doing this? Wouldn't it just be easier to wait until she bakes the cookies?"

"Bakes cookies are good, but cookie dough is unrivaled." Reno shook his head. "So, are you in?"

"I'm not." Tseng stood up. "I've seen Elena mad, and it's not pretty."

"Ha! You've just got a crush on her." Reno ducked the chair Tseng threw at him as he left. "Fine, that leaves you and me, Rude."

Rude sighed. "I'm assuming I don't get a choice?"

Reno shook his head. "Nope. Actually, hang on." Reno sprinted out the door and Rude listened to him talking to Tseng in the room next door. There was a shout, a crash of something being thrown and Reno shouting that Tseng was scared of Elena. After a minute Reno limped into the room.

"Ok, so he's not helpin'." Reno shook his head and muttered, "Coward."

Rude growled and followed Reno down the stairs and into the living room. Rufus glanced up as the walked through.

"Where's Elena?" Reno glanced towards the silent kitchen.

"She's in the bathroom. Tseng wouldn't help you in whatever suicide attempt?"

"Nah," Reno shook his head. "You wanna, Sir?"

"No." Rufus turned back to the paper. "I'm already in a wheelchair, I don't need anything worse."

Reno shook his head. "C'mon, it'll be fun."

Rufus shook his head and Reno turned to the kitchen, pulling Rude after him. "Then don't tell her we're in here."

The kitchen was quiet when Reno stuck his head around the door and glanced in. Elena had already put the cookie dough on the sheets and Reno could smell one sheet cooking. "We're just in time, she only has one left."

Reno ducked in and ran to the counter. He stared scrapping parts of the outsides of the cookies into his palm. He had a pretty sizable amount when the alarm on the stove went off.

"Oh no." Rude stepped back towards the door.

From the hall they could hear Elena's voice coming closer. Reno glanced at Rude and tried to duck under the table. Too late. "RENO! NOT AGAIN!" Elena was standing in the door and glaring at the two Turks. "Rude, you too?"

Rude put his hands up to show they were empty and edged towards the door. Elena spun on Reno who was still holding the handful of cookie dough.

"Uh," Reno backed away into the counter. "You wouldn't even have know if you'd set the stupid buzzer for a minute later."

Elena's eyes narrowed to the thinnest slits and Reno's grew wide. He crammed the cookie dough in his mouth and made a run for the door. Elena jumped at him and missed as he ran into the living room. He ducked behind Rufus as Elena sprinted out of the kitchen.

"Where is he? He ate a whole cookie!" Elena glared around and Rufus moved his wheelchair forward.

"Sorry, Reno."

Reno put his arms over his head as Elena lifted the wooden spoon again. "At least my last meal was cookie dough."