Chapter 4 - A Night of Thoughts
Severus sat back in his chair flipping through the book feeling more and more disconcerted about the whole affair. Even with the book he could find no solution for the predicament he was in. She was sure to ask many questions the next day, he mused while sipping his firewhiskey. Abruptly he stopped wondering should he even be drinking alcohol with the presence of a minor. Then he shook his head. Of course not, just as long as he didn't get drunk.
His thoughts turned to the heart of his new problem, Hermione Granger, who had left, disappeared from the face of the planet leaving behind only a ghost of a name. She had told him several times before they had parted that she had to go. He, in fact, had been the only one to know that she was leaving. She had left a note behind her for her friends to find.
Do not follow. I am fine.
HG
Not a word of where she was going, what she was to be doing and when she would return, if ever. She had told him that she had gotten a job offer that she could not refuse and would make her a ghost to the rest of the world. And all that was left her was a memory that Severus had hoped to avoid for the rest of his miserable days. She was declared dead by the Ministry of Magic and the only trace left was her legacy as a member of the Golden Trio and her part in the Final Battle.
Not a whisper revealing her existence.
Not until the appearance of a homeless looking child at the door of Severus Snape, Potions Master, the last person to see Hermione Granger. Of course nobody but him knew that.
Before she had left he had noticed subtle changes in her. Things he hadn't been able to put a finger to. Her studies had suffered and she had left before her NEWT results had arrived. She had slept less and less, partly due to her affair with her professor. It had been the last time he had begged anything of anyone.
Anger began welling up in him. What job could have been so damn important that she had left and taken his unborn child with her. He had professed to her that he loved her. She had been the only woman to have ever heard those words pass his lips. They had even agreed upon a binding ceremony a few weeks after term would have been over. Then out of the blue she had said the words that were etched into his memory forever. A memory of pain, a moment he didn't know he had truly had a heart before it was broken, shattered into irreparable pieces.
"I am leaving. And there is nothing you can say or do that will change my mind. Believe me, it is for the best."
He, the master of deception, had nodded hiding his inner turmoil as he had done all of his life. But when he had held her that night he had held her tighter than ever before. And when she was gone, he had collapsed without the energy to move tremors wracking through his body as all the hope for a better future he had had left him with only loneliness. Eventually others had pulled him back into the world and forced him to function as he had done. Teaching, research, duties. His temper had grown even more legendary than ever in the days of spying.
Nathaira, the spawn of a snake. What a fitting name for a child of his, the Head of Slytherin. What did not amuse him however was the name's connection with Nagini, Voldemort's snake familiar.
The book of parenting forgotten he turned his thoughts to the saddening child who was his daughter. There was no knowing what being a "quiet child" meant since the girl was a stranger to the company of others. His anger flared again. What happened to the Gryffindor know-it-all to take on such a dangerous job, one that made it worth endangering a child and abandon a promising life with him?
Sighing and looking at the time, he got up absently thinking about the girl in the next room stripping his clothes ready to slip under the satin sheets naked as he always. Cursing he remembered the girl and not wanting to traumatise her for life, he put on pyjama bottoms and fell into the bed.
Nathaira woke up the next morning someplace warm and comfortable. She couldn't remember when she had felt warm and comfortable. She also felt clean, a novelty in the run and hide lifestyle she had lead with her mother for as long as she could remember. She wondered for a moment where she was and then blanched with the memory. This was, what her mother had called, her father's house. A man called Professor Severus Snape.
When she had walked to the door of the desolate looking place she hadn't been sure what she had been expecting from the man she had dreamed about as long as she could remember. He had been cold, not unkind, but polite. She had recognised him the moment he had opened the door. Her mother had shown her a picture of him, but she could see her eyes and hands were given to her from him.
She started out of her mind at the sound of the shower. She got up and crept carefully to the door opening it slightly. There was no one in the murky corridor. She tiptoed back into the room and to her carpet bag pulling out her few belongings. All her clothes were tattered and aged quickly. They were all either grey or brown, serving the purpose of disguise in forests and the wilderness. She wouldn't miss the wide open spaces, as her mother had called them joking and failing miserably at trying to lighten the mood. Where ever Nathaira would be, she wouldn't be there. That was the only thing she was sure about.
She put on a sagging brown hoodie with leather patches at the elbows and grey jeans that had become soft and flexible also with leather patches covering the knees. She brushed her hair, not that she ever needed to, and put on her black leather boots, the only fine piece of wear her mother had been able to get her. They were perfect for hiking through almost any terrain. After that she slipped out of the room and silently slipped down the stairs.
Severus had slept fitfully finally getting up at six o'clock deciding to go to the shower. The house was silent if one discounted the normal creaks of a ruin like Spinner's End. The hot water caressed his body slightly relaxing his troubled muscles. He turned off the shower and dressed in black trousers and a white button-up shirt as he had done in his many years of teaching finding them quite comfortable. He wore black socks and decided against putting on any other footwear.
He walked across the corridor and down the stairs after casting a Silencio on his feet in an attempt to not wake up the child. He was surprised to find her sitting at the kitchen table over a well-read book her black hair cascading around it like a curtain. Severus cleared his throat and she looked up at him with an apprehensive gaze that sent his mind wondering what she was thinking.
"Good morning", he said.
"Good morning, sir", she answered and observed him.
"I didn't expect you to be up", he said trying to spark up some sort of conversation.
"I'm used to it", was her answer, with a certain finality as if to tell him to stop the line of questioning. He complied, asking instead:
"Is there anything you prefer to eat for breakfast?"
Her face became contemplative and then she shrugged nonchalantly.
"Whatever you deem appropriate, sir."
Severus looked at her a bit dazed trying to remember what little he had read in the book the night before. He shook his head in consternation chiding himself for thinking feeding an eight year old girl a complicated task. She could eat on her own and probably had similar preferences to what the students in Hogwarts did. He took out toast on a plate and set the butter and slices of ham on the table. She smiled at him and turned back to the book absently waving her hands making the toast butter and add ham to it summoning it to her hand and biting into it with an appreciative noise. Severus looked at her for a moment and then noted something odd.
"Do you not have the trace on you?"
She looked up at him with a puzzled expression on her face before realisation dawned on her.
"Oh no. Mother removed it immediately. Couldn't have us being traced", she said dismissively. This caught his attention.
"She was able to remove the Ministry trace for tracking underaged witches and wizards?"
She looked at him as if he had lost his mind.
"Well. Yes, sir."
"How extensive are your skills in wandless magic?"
"Useful. You know, preparing food, summoning things, shrinking, enlarging, levitating... Things like that."
He nodded, slightly in awe. He himself was quite proficient in performing wandless magic. They ate a moment in silence.
"Sir? If you don't mind my asking, but..." the girl began as he looked at her noting for the first time how old she seemed. Something had to be done about her clothes. They were worn and only shy of falling apart. She did wear, to his amazement, good quality dragon hide boots. "What will happen now?"
"How do you mean?" Severus countered.
"Will..." She seemed to try to gather her courage. "Will you allow me to stay or will I be sent away?"
"Why would you think you would be sent away?"
"Well, mother..." she faltered. "Mother said that... You don't really like children."
Severus looked at her amusement tinkling in his eyes.
"I've never said I do not like children. True, I am not fond of any of them, especially since most of them are complete and utter dunderheads."
"Oh."
Was all she said to that and looked at the table. He sighed.
"Nathaira."
She looked up at him with bewilderment.
"Yes, sir?"
Her voice was questioning as was her face.
"We will have a visitor today. The Headmistress of Hogwarts, in fact. Are you up to meeting her?"
Nathaira's face turned slightly panicked.
"I... I... If you want me to, sir", she said her shoulders slumped.
Well, so far she is obedient, Severus thought.
"Do you not feel comfortable meeting her? Do not lie to me, Nathaira."
She nodded and breathed in heavily.
"I... I've never met anybody before", she said silently. "I... I don't know if mother would approve, sir."
"Your mother is not here, Nathaira. She relinquished your guardianship to me as you arrived at my door and I think it time for you to begin meeting people outside the immediate vicinity of your family. Now, we have some time before Professor McGonagall will arrive. Tell me about your childhood."