Please don't kill me! A: I haven't updated in years. Sorry! B: I'm kind changing the storyline a bit. Sorry! Enjoy and review! P.S Thank you, lozzabluebell for the brilliant idea. The only problem I have with it is that I'm already writing a Morgana evily. I will probably use some of your ideas though.
"Gaius." Merlin acknowledged the old man as he dragged himself into the chamber.
"Merlin, my boy, what are you doing here?"
"Arthur gave me the day off. I know!" Gaius looked at Merlin suspiciously.
"You look awful." Gaius stated, blandly.
"I feel it." Merlin quickly explained what had happened in Arthur's chamber's to Gaius. Gaius didn't seam surprised. "I'm really confused. I don't love fire. Where did it come from?" Merlin sat down next to Gaius and started looking through some of Gaius' books. The old man didn't copy. "Why aren't you helping me look?" Merlin asked, confused.
"I'm wondering why you aren't... well, thinking the same way now." Merlin stopped and cocked his head, similar to a dog when it's confused.
"I'm not sure..."
"I think I have a very slight idea of what it might be, but I want you to tell me everything that you relate to fire."
"Why?"
"Don't ask why, just do it."
"Um... death, hot, yellow... flame, candle...um... light... magic, Freya-" He stopped himself then. Freya. Oh, how he missed her. Her smile, her beauty, how she was so fragile, and yet so strong... so great to be around. She was what made Merlin happy. She was what made him use magic a few steps away from the King to help him steal his breakfast for her.
"-it!...Merlin?" Gaius had been talking the whole way though Merlin's reverie.
"I'm sorry, Gaius. Could you repeat that?" Merlin tried to stifle sobs, but Gaius could see.
"Merlin... I had to..." Gaius said as he realised how much her death had affected the young warlock, and he held himself completely responcible. If only he hadn't told Uther... if he'd only let Merlin take her away...
"I know, Gaius. I don't hold anyone responcible. Not even Arthur." Merlin wiped his eyes with his sleeve. He raised his head and tryed to stop crying.
"Merlin. I know what this is. It's longing." Merlin looked at him, confused.
"Longing? For Freya?"
"Yes. I believe you miss her, but your not speaking about it, are you?" The young warlock shook his head, guilty. "You see. That isn't good for you. I think that your longing is coming out in other ways. Talk to someone about it." Merlin asked who. "Arthur?"
"Arthur? OK, first things first, Arthur will have no sympathy at all! And if he does, it'll brake his heart: he killed her."
"But Arthur is the one you are closest to. I think he would be the best person to talk to on the matter."
"But-but-but..." Merlin couldn't think of another reason not to talk to Arthur. "How about Gwen?"
"Gwen? Well, I'm positive she'd be understanding, but you will still have to tell Arthur after what happened in his chamber's, he deserves an explanation. He gave you the day off, Merlin. He's expecting something's the matter." Merlin nodded. He stood up and stretched his arms. "Merlin."
"Yes?"
"Take a rest before you see Arthur. Get your head in place."
Merlin nodded and trudged to his room. When his door closed behind him, Gaius sighed, reminded once again, that this was his fault.
Sorry if any characters were... not in character. Thank you for sticking with me x x x