Over the next week, Garrus took Joker's advice. He was especially attentive to Shepard, attempting to show her how much he cared about her in a more personal way. If she noticed a difference, she didn't say. He knew he had to keep on the same path if he had any chance of talking to her about it, and maybe convincing her to give him a second chance. She was definitely not with Thane, that he knew. It was true, the guy was committed to his meditations and had just been interested in the different crew. If anyone caught his eye, it was Samara, and a more tragic relationship couldn't have been imagined, so they wisely keep things on a friendly level.
He had finally gotten brave enough to ask for a sort of date. They'd finished the mission on the Migrant Fleet to help Tali, and had some shore leave time starting that night. He was waiting outside Miranda's office, where Shepard was giving her a debrief. He couldn't help but laugh to himself, remembering how Kaidan used to stand outside her office, waiting for a chance to talk to her. Now he was doing the same thing. "Hopefully I'll have better luck than he did."
The door finally opened and as Shepard walked by, she saw him, "Hey Garrus, you ready for shore leave tonight?"
He leaned off the wall and stepped towards her, "Definitely. I was hoping we could do something together. Do you have plans?"
She put her hands on her hips, "Nope. I thought I might go out. There's some club on Illium Kasumi keeps telling me about," she shrugged, "I suppose I'll check it out."
"Maybe we could do something here. You know, like watch a vid or something?"
She furrowed her brows, "What, do you have vid feed in there? I thought it was just extranet." She pointed towards the forward battery.
He started to feel a bit unsure about this, but pressed on anyway, "No, I mean maybe up in your quarters. You've got a screen, right?"
"Oh," she suddenly realized what he meant, "Yea, yea I do. Sure, I think that's a great idea. How about you give me an hour, and meet me up there. I'll give you the code," she brought up her omni-tool and punched some buttons, "There. We can decide what we're going to watch when you come up."
"Okay, great." Garrus was hopeful.
An hour later he was at her door. He entered the code, and came in to find her pushing the button on the panel to bring the vidscreen down across from her couch.
"Hey, right on time, as usual."
He leaned against the fish tank, "As any good Turian would be."
"What's that?"
He looked down at the box in his hand, "Oh, that's some snacks I put together. I figured you'd have drinks."
She nodded. They sat on the couch and watched an action vid, eating snacks and drinking water.
"I'm not drinking any more liquor for a while, not after that poker night. I had a headache the whole next day."
He looked over at her, "You used to be able to drink Wrex under the table. What happened?"
"Since Cerberus rebuilt me, things are different. Somethings even they can't explain."
"It must be hard for you."
"I think the hardest part is how I feel like I let everyone down when they thought I was dead for two years. People move on, change. Yet for me, it's only been a few months. It's like being a ghostly time traveler."
He turned to face her, "Do you remember being dead?"
She shook her head, "I don't think I ever actually was. I remember losing consciousness. Then waking up briefly on a medical bed on the Cerberus base. I think because the planet was frozen, I was in a type of coma. I do know the work they did on me was extensive. I saw the laboratory notes on the station. I try not to think about it too much."
"I didn't mean to upset you, I'm sorry."
"It's okay, actually, you're one of the few people I can talk to about it. No, I just mean I try not to dwell on it. It's too bizarre. I just focus on keeping healthy, the mission, and trying to maintain my relationships as best I can. I try to strike a balance. I wasn't like that on the SR1."
He nodded.
She looked at him critically, "What about you? You never talk about what it was like, me being declared dead for two years, then finding out I was alive."
Garrus looked down at the floor. "It was the worst time of my life. I felt like my heart had been ripped out. The grief was so overwhelming, I changed my life completely. I decided to try to honor your memory by putting together a team like you did, but you know how that ended up."
She was struck by the strength of his emotion. She could feel his pain. "That's what I mean. I feel responsible for so much anguish, so much hurt and anger."
He snapped his head up, "That's nonsense. Your fight to live and survive, your strength is the only reason you're still here now. Yes, Cerberus performed a medical miracle, but without your will, it wouldn't have worked." His voice became passionate as he sat forward, "I'd go through a thousand more days of pain if it meant I could see you again, have you back here with me, if only for a moment."
She was speechless. The tension in the air between them was palpable. She looked down and finally said, "I'm glad you were honest enough to tell me that. Everyone else tiptoes around the subject."
"It was a horrible time in my life, for all of us, but it makes me treasure the time with you now all the more." He put his hand on her leg. She put her hand over his and smiled weakly.
Her omni-tool lit up. It was Admiral Hackett. "I have to take this Garrus."
"Sure. It's getting late. I'll see you in the morning, Jane."
She walked with him to the door. He turned towards her and gave her a quick, strong hug before leaving. Shepard took a deep breath and turned her screen on from her desk computer. Hackett's face flickered across the wide glass.
"Commander, thank you for your time. I'll keep this brief…"
The next days brought the continuation of the mission, and helping her crew members. Miranda's sister was rescued, Liara tracked down the Shadow Broker and became it, as well. She took Garrus on every mission, alternating other crew members. She could feel the intensity of their missions growing exponentially. She was grateful for the caliber of her crew, supporting her and dedicating themselves to fighting the enemy.
After a particularly grueling mission, she was up in her quarters, tiredly taking her armor off. She could barely get her underarmor off. In her shower, she sat on the floor, letting the water and steam wash away the sweat, the dirt, the day. Her hair hung down in watery dark ropes around her face. She moved to let the water pulse on her back in an attempt to loosen the knots in her muscles. After what seemed an eternity, she stood up and shampooed and soaped off, turning off the water. She grabbed a towel and watched her reflection as she dried herself off. She could see her implant lines glowing a little brighter, which they did when her body temperature was up. She wrapped her robe around her and scrunched her hair dry. As the bathroom door whooshed open, she stopped with a start. There was a bouquet of flowers on her desk that hadn't been there before. Puzzled, she reached out and touched a few petals. "Pretty. I wonder who's been in here." The blooms were a mix of red and orange. "Someone who knows I don't like pink." She smelled them and checked her computer for messages. None. She checked her omni-tool. There was one there.
"Happy Birthday, Jane. Come to my quarters when you get a chance, I've got a surprise for you." It was from Garrus.
"Birthday?" she checked her omni-tool for the date. He was right. She'd totally forgotten about it. "I guess I've got two birthdays I've missed, too." She lightly touched the petal of one of the flowers. This was certainly a surprise. And he said there was another one downstairs? She mustered the remaining energy she had left and got dressed. Soon she was outside his door.
"Jane, I know it's late, but I didn't want you to think I forgot."
She walked in to see he had moved some crates and set up a cake for her. "This is so nice of you, Garrus. I had completely forgotten about my birthday." She smiled up at him as she sat down in front of the crate.
"It's dextro, so we can both eat it."
"Really? Do Turians celebrate birthdays as well?"
"Of course. Not usually with cake, but I've done my research," he was touched to see she had taken one of the blooms and put it in her hair.
"Those flowers are beautiful, thank you. I can't remember the last time I ever got any." She picked up the knife and looked at the small cake. "Can I go ahead and cut it?"
"Don't you have to make a wish first?"
"Oh, you read about that, huh? That's if you have a candle in it to blow out. You make a wish, but you can't tell anyone, or it won't come true."
Garrus looked disappointed, "Damn, I didn't know, I would have gotten one."
She laughed, "Don't worry about it, this is fantastic. I'll make a wish anyway, then cut the cake."
"Do I get to make a wish as well?"
"Um, sure, why not." She closed her eyes and opened them with a smile and cut two pieces of cake.
He reached for a slice, and she stopped him, "No, whoever's birthday it is gets the first slice."
He smirked, "There are a lot of rules with human birthdays."
"More like a lot of traditions. It makes things fun." She handed him the second slice. "I can't wait to try it." She took a bite. It was delicious, not too sweet, very similar to amino cake.
"How is it?" he asked.
"Wonderful. Where did you get it?"
"Oh, I've got my sources."
She looked across the crate at him, "You've been planning this for a while, haven't you?"
He nodded.
She continued to eat her cake and give him admiring glances. He was the best thing in her life, the best thing that ever happened to her.
"So what was your wish?" she asked him.
"No, you said it wouldn't come true if you told anyone."
"Damn, thought you'd missed that part."
"I don't miss much, Jane. Well, that's not entirely true. I completely missed you having feelings for me."
She slowly chewed her bite of cake, "I know. That's all in the past now though." She took a drink of water. "Like the flower in my hair?"
"Yes. It's beautiful. You're beautiful."
She let out a small grunt of frustration. "Thanks, Garrus." This was the first time he'd brought up that night she kissed him. She wished he had just let it go, like she was trying to do.
"Is it really, Jane? In the past?"
"What?"
"Your feelings for me?"
She put the fork down, "Why are we discussing this now, Garrus? We were having a nice time, it's my birthday, we're over that." she put her head in her hands.
He reached out for her arm, and worked his hand up to hers. "I'm not over that."
She huffed, "I apologized a long time ago. If you are still put off it, I don't know what else to do."
"No, wait-"
"No, listen to me. I've worked really hard since then to keep things like they were before. I thought our relationship, our friendship, was strong enough to overlook what I did that day." She stood up. She shook her head vigorously and put her hands on her hips.
"Don't think this hasn't been hard for me, to stuff my feelings down and pretend like they're not there." She looked down at his shocked face and felt tears forming in her eyes.
He jumped up, stammering, but she was at the door in a flash and walking down the hallway. He stood in the open doorway and yelled out to her, "Hey, Jane, come back!"
She continued to walk furiously.
"I changed my mind. I do want to be in a relationship with you." He called out.
She froze. She turned and squinted her eyes at him, "What did you say?"
He leaned against his doorway and said calmly, "I said I changed my mind and I do want to have a relationship with you."
She stared at him. "Get inside." And she pointed in his quarters. He turned and went in as she was fast behind him, closing the door.
She folded her arms, "What the hell are you talking about?"
"I wasn't expecting you to get so angry, please just hear me out."
"Is this some kind of joke? Because I'm seriously pissed off."
"I'm not joking, I'm being honest. I thought about it more, and I love you, I want to be with you."
She blinked at him, unbelieving what she was hearing, trying to process this shift.
He started to pace nervously. "When you kissed me that night, I was really put off by being with a human, I mean, I've never thought of one romantically. That's why I told you no. But, over time, I kept thinking about it, thinking about you, and I came around to the idea." He looked at her frowning face and realized he just said everything wrong. "Dammit, I'm messing this all up. The bottom line is, I can't stop thinking about you, I treasure you, and I'm hoping you'll give me a second chance." He held his breath, hoping that was better than his previous speech.
She turned around and walked over to a side crate and sat on it. "Let me get this straight. You're saying that when I made a pass at you, you were grossed out, had never thought about me, a human, in that way. Right?"
Garrus groaned, "Yes."
"But you've been thinking about it ever since, and did some research on the extranet – what, about human-Turian relations?"
Garrus moaned, "Yes."
"And now you think the idea is acceptable to you."
"Well, technically, that's all true." He looked down at the floor. "But there's more to it,"
"So all this lately has been you trying to – win me over?"
He said with frustration, "Yes. I got some advice, and tried to show you I was sincere in my attempt to get you back."
She stood up and walked quickly over to him. She looked at him intently and as she had months ago, reached up and put her hands around his face and kissed his cheek. This time he reached around and pulled her waist in closer to him. She put her chin on his shoulder, and he moved his hands up her back and snuggled into her hair.
"Jane, please forgive me."
"For being honest? I can't fault you for that."
"No, for being blind and stupid. And thank you for allowing me the opportunity to show you how much I truly love and adore you." He squeezed her tighter, then pulled back and leaned down and kissed her. She returned with her soft lips and held onto his shoulders.