TITLE: PLAN B

CHAPTER: A Possible Paranoia

FANDOM: She's the Man

RATING: T

PAIRING: Olivia/Viola

Disclaimer: Still don't own them.

AUTHOR'S NOTE: Another long wait. So sorry, my computer's still busted. I had to use my dad's. And we all know what he'd do to me if he caught me writing this. Lalala. So hope you like this one! Even though it's sorta rushed.

PLAN B

CHAPTER 4

You had to get out of that room. That was… That was unexpected. You lost yourself for a moment there. And you weren't exactly prepared it. Did you mention that it was totally unexpected?

It felt like a soccer game. Your lungs burning, your heart beating so hard against your chest, the lack of air and a very intense warmth. That was the first time you ever had that combination of emotions off the playing field, off the grass.

How could Olivia Lennox do that to you? How is that humanly possible?

Maybe it was Gold's teasing. Okay, you know the Headmaster (Head-without that much hair- Master) meant well, but why does he have to do that to you? To the both of you? He wasn't doing that to any other students. Oh right, you were the only transfer student.

Heck, you were probably the only transferee who was posing as her twin brother. The only transferee (posing as her brother but is actually a girl) who felt turned on by her lab partner. And said lab partner is also definitely a fellow member of the female species.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

This was so not happening! Not when you thought you were real sure about your sexual orientation. Okay, you should tell Paul that if ever you said that you were going to pose as your brother again, you give him permission to shoot a tranquilizer dart, placate, and hypnotize you when you wake up, anything to stop you from doing anything like this ever again.

Because really, you fear for your sanity. And the thoughts in your head aren't making things any better.

She's a girl…

Yeah, isn't that obvious? Maybe you mean she's a pretty girl.

And that train of thought lead to…

You're a girl…

Oh right. You almost forgot that, since you were dressing up as a boy, trying to act like one and all...

Which made you remember that…

You were a STRAIGHT girl!

Yeah, you're right, says the logical part of your brain. Totally right. You were a straight girl.

That has to mean that you are now… drum roll please… BISEXUAL!!

Oh. Shit.

Great soul-searching you're doing here, Vi. What? Now you're bi? Abso-fuckin-lutely deep.

You were pretty sure that you were going straight (or bisexually?) to hell.

In a way, you were starting to understand why Sebastian even dated Monique.

You recall his answer.

"She's hot."

And crap. This is taking operation 'Be Sebastian' to the next level. Yeah, you were starting to find girls attractive, in a way that no normal girl would ever find another of her kind to be.

In true twin brother fashion, the Sebastian part of Viola tells the Viola part of Viola that she has always been abnormal.

Yes. You're annoying yourself like he does. Effing perfect. Why were you doing this to yourself again? Oh yeah, soccer. You love soccer. Soccer. Soccer. Viola loves soccer. Yes you do.

Viola Sucker.

Maybe that was more like it.

"Hey Sebastian!"

You unintentionally jumped in surprise. You turn around to find the voice calling you.

It was Maria, her friend, who was probably looking for her.

"Have you seen Olivia?" she asks in a hurry, juggling with her bag and her books. She looked really busy. Someone you definitely didn't want to piss off by giving obscure answers as to where the person in question is.

But you do it anyway. It had just occurred to you that you were trying to get as far away as possible from her. Who knew where she was?

"Sorry, I don't know."

She gives you a look of disbelief. Then what she said next totally threw you off guard.

"Oh, you two haven't been together?" her tone and the way her eyebrows were raised, suggestive.

What now? Does she want an inside scoop on how you had a nonexistent make-out session with Olivia?

A make-out session with Olivia…

What the hell?! Did you just let out a hopeful sigh?

Ahhhhh! What were you thinking? Shake it off, shake it off. Dirty thoughts will go away. Come to think of it, that locker looks pretty nice to knock your head into…

Even though that up-coming dance on Friday was going to most likely make those thoughts feelings resurface. Nope it's never going to happen again.

Just keep telling yourself that and you'll be fine.

You almost forgot that Maria was still in front of you. She probably thought you were crazy, sighing for no apparent reason.

"Try the cafeteria." You suggest, wondering why Maria didn't look for her there, considering it was lunch time. And when it's lunch time, you usually find people eating lunch… in the cafeteria.

She gave a curt nod of thanks and proceeded to look for Olivia in the cafeteria.

Okay, look who's not going to eat lunch today? You weren't even going to go near there.

Unless… they have pizza.

"Hastings!"

Uh oh. You knew that voice. It's been shouting at you for the past few days. Most of those articulated shouts involved the words 'Nancy Boy' but you didn't mind. You still busted your ass out there, tired as hell to let it get to you. Heck, you weren't even a boy anyway.

With your eyes screwed shut, you turn around (for the nth time!) again, bracing yourself to face your Coach's wrath. Then you let out a big breath, about to open them. But before that happens, he throws something at you. The piece of cloth plops right onto your face and as it fell you managed to catch it.

Your eyes open slowly to find a candy red Illyrian starter jersey. And your jaw drops immediately. All logical thought seemed to escape you and you throw yourself at your Coach, hugging him. You felt his body go rigid at contact and you could almost hear his thoughts thinking, "Nancy Boy". Then again, you were starting for the Cornwall game, you didn't care. Coach just has to be disturbed by the memory of you hugging him forever.

"Really?" you ask, just to make sure this wasn't all a dream. Cuz what Olivia did to you back there in Biology class sure felt like one. You even considered asking Coach to pinch you. But you figured that might've hurt and you don't want to injure yourself three days before the big game if this all wasn't a dream or anything.

"No, I was joking, you idiot!" he answers you in his usual sarcastic way. That confirms that this was in fact, real. Yes! Yes! Yes! You were going to do a happy dance (that consisted of stupid 60's disco moves) the moment Coach was out of sight. Yep, you were going to do it in the middle of a student-packed hall.

(BGM: Earth, Wind and Fire's Groove Tonight)

AFTER A VERY ENTERTAINING HAPPY DANCE…

Of which you received many stares of mixed terror and amusement.

You went straight to the cafeteria because you heard from Toby that Andrew got tomato sauce stains on his coat. Once you got in, you lined up for some pizza!

AFTER WAITING FIVE MINUTES IN LINE

You finally get your pizza. But then you almost dropped your tray because you spotted Olivia. Duh she was going to be here, you even told Maria she was going to be there. Oh, it looks like Maria's already found her because she was sitting next to her.

You were rather surprised that you caught her looking at you. Then you hit a random post that was inconveniently not in your line of vision because all that was in yours was her. Damn, you couldn't stand straight. Ah! You're feeling it again. Scolding yourself, you give a quick smile and walked out of there. With the pizza you waited in line for of course (which was miraculously still intact after your tray's collision with stupid randomly-placed post).

PIZZA AND TWO HOURS OF CLASS LATER

You went up to the dorm to change into your practice outfit. And you can't help but clutch on to your starter jersey for dear life. Ever since you were a little girl, this was what you lived for. You hold it in front of you, examining it in all its glory. And in a bold white font, you read:

HASTINGS - 13

Then you felt pride all over you. All the stuff that was going on, all the problems and complications, just to feel this, it was all worth it. You just know that you have a stupid grin on your face.

But you had to go there as the other Hastings. As Sebastian, the male one.

This reminded you that you had to go to that party as Olivia's 'friendly-not-so-friendly' date.

Simply put, you were going as a guy.

And you didn't know how to pull that off, the dance was in three days.

That meant you had to call…

"Hello?"

"Paul, it's me."

"What is it now?" he asks agitatedly. He was probably doing Kia's hair. And you and Yvonne know that out of the three of you, Oaul found Kia exceptionally hard to work with due to her short attention span.

"Kia! Keep your head still!" you hear at the other end.

Yep, you were right. After listening to a few scissor snips, you cleared your throat, trying to catch Sir Paul's attention, which was a far cry from that of Kia's.

"Sorry, it's Kia. You know how it is with her. Don't worry, she'll look absolutely gorge after Fabio shampoos her hair." He says animatedly, it sounded like he was happy with the way Kia's hair turned out. And who the hell is Fabio? The new guy who wants to be a girl? Lord knows that there are a lot of those people out there already.

"Yeah, can't wait to see her Paul. Anyway, the reason I called is cause there's this dance at Illyria on Friday…"

"Oooohhh, listening attentively now!" you knew that this was his kind of thing. He probably had a freaking hail storm of ideas by now.

You continue "And we have to be in costumes—" and he cuts in again.

"—Since you gave me an almost unreasonable three-day notice, I pledge to find you the perfect costume, do your make-up (did you need make-up?), style your hair (Yes, Paul does in fact style wigs). And I'll throw Yvonne in as a date." He enumerates, all business-like. You love it when he does that, like you didn't even have to ask. Come to think of it, you didn't ask.

"Awww, Paul. You're such a good friend. I don't know what I'd do without you." You say sentimentally. Maybe the next minute you'd be crying your eyes out.

"You'd be an out of school youth with really bad hair. Your ends were doing splits like acrobats before I dealt with them. You'd totally be lost and clueless, the TV show and the movie."

That's so Paul. To the untrained ear and eye, he'd make no sense. But once you get to know and understand the enigma that is Paul, you are enlightened like Buddha himself has guided you through a decade of meditation in the woods.

"Hey! It's not that bad!" you defend! Your fingers flying to your hair.

"Viola! Don't touch! You'll mess up your wig."

He doesn't miss a beat. He knew you too well.

Seriously, he should be the sixth member of Queer Eye, they wouldn't be the Fab Five anymore, they'd be the Super Six or the Sexy Six (copyright that later!).

Or Paul could have his own show. It would be called:

Queer Eye for the Straight Guy Who's Actually a Girl Who's Bi

Yeah, that show would be an absolute hit, since it still rhymes and everything. You could see it now. And the first episode's going to be based on you. Yes, that was the way it was going to go.

Wait! Did he say that he was going to set you up with Yvonne? Whoops… And you forgot to tell him that?!

"Ummm, Paul?" your voice tentative and unsure on how to put this.

He stayed silent. You knew that he knew what was coming. He's gonna let you say it. He knew you did something wrong.

"I sort of have a date already." You admit slowly. And you don't know why, but guiltily too.

"Who asked who?" It was scary the way he was all accusatory and stiff.

"She asked me." You say truthfully.

Silence again. Paul being silent was nice every once in a while because he talks non-stop but this silence? Not good.

"God, I'm so stupid! I should've seen it coming. How could I have forgotten about this?!" he yells at himself. You can see him rolling his eyes at the other end.

"Forget about what?" you ask, having no idea on what he was talking about.

"Look, Vi. You have this great personality. And it just comes out in huge waves that anyone can drown in…" Okay, what was he talking about? "… Especially someone of the opposite sex."

"So that now everyone thinks that you're a guy. Well, let's just say that you can't help it if some girl falls for you."

"She's not just some girl, Paul!" you say a little ticked off. You thought he'd be a little more sensitive. He was gay for God's sake!

"Oh my God." He says surprised and horrified at the same time.

"You… like-like her, don't you?" he whispers. How could he see right through you? He wasn't even seeing you! You hope nobody at the salon was listening to this conversation. Rumors like this could make your mom mad enough to try and kill you. She didn't want her 'darling debutant' crushing on another fellow debutant. No siree.

So you weren't going to admit and give into Paul this time. Another lie wouldn't hurt. You were on a run.

"I don't like her like that Paul." You say calmly, like the whole thing was amusing you when this was all freaking you out of your cleats. You had soccer practice in ten.

"We're only going as friends. No biggie. We sort of had this deal so I could hook her up with Duke who's helping me with soccer." To you it sounded pretty plausible.

Buy it. Buy it. It's mostly true. Please Paul. This is sort of knocking my brains out right now.

He lets out a heavy sigh. He decided to drop it… for now. Knowing Paul, he was going to call you later that night and get it out of you.

He just gives you some eerie last words.

"Just don't do anything you'll regret, Vi. I don't want to see you hurt."

"You're not going to." You assure him.

"Good. You have practice in eight." He says abruptly, creeping the bejeebers out of you.

"I know, I know. Do you have to keep track of my life 24/7?" you feel like you were being babied. C'mon, you could do just fine on your own.

"Actually, 24/5, I don't care about your weekends."

Okay, only the weekends were fine alone.

"Right, gotta go. Thanks a lot Paul, you're the best!"

"I know. I'll hook you up real nice. Bye Vi, go kick some balls." He says and you can feel his toothy smile through the smile.

"Bye." Then you flip your phone shut.

You absolutely love Paul. In a totally platonic way. But before you could ponder any longer of the grotesque subject of loving Paul, your phone suddenly goes off again (I'm a Barbie—shit! Stop ringing!)

For the past five days you had 72 missed calls.

Justin so needs to get a life.

You throw your phone haphazardly on your mattress and pick up a soccer ball.

You had a feeling that soccer balls weren't the only ones you were going to kick during that Cornwall game.

Put it this way: Justin had to guard a lot more objects of great importance than just the Cornwall goal posts.

Right in between his legs was a good place to start looking after.