Ben had avoided any and all questions from Jack about what he thought, what he knew. Because he didn't know for sure. Not yet. He would soon, but as of now, he didn't know. So he gave the kids money for the hotel and slid back to Texas, saying he had business to attend to at his club. And to call him if they needed him.
The hotel Kaylie and Jack had checked into was walking distance to the hospital. It was late, but it was well lit. Or maybe it was early morning, it was hard to tell. But the Impala was parked in front of the hospital, its shiny black metal body reflecting the street lights like a beacon.
"Isn't that Dean's?" Kaylie asked Jack, recognizing the car. And Dean had told her enough times (too many times) that there weren't many of them left. She also remembered Sam saying he'd taken Dean to the hospital in a rental.
Jack nodded. "Yeah. But Sam said he would bring it to him once things settled down." It had to be a good sign. Or at least he hoped it was a good sign, that the car was there. But he doubted that whatever the problem was that had Sam running away in the night would be resolved so easily. The middle Winchester seemed pretty selfish from where Jack stood. And if not selfish, then at least immature in how he handled things.
Jack had thought that it was to protect Dean, that Sam had taken off before. Part of him really wanted to believe that had been the case, but there had been something off with the man, the day before as they had watched Dean dying. A denial of it all on a level that creeped him out. The genuine shock on his face when Dean's heart had stopped. That wasnt just an 'oh god this is actually happening' look.
He peeked into the car and spotted a note on the seat, weighed down by a woman's earring, and he sighed, looking at Kaylie. "Bets?" He asked as he got into the car to pick up the note addressed to Dean, and the earring that held it down.
Kaylie looked at the note. "She wanted to go home," she read, "so I sent her there." She shivered. "That sounds...like way ominous. Okay, I'm freaked out. Are you freaked out? Because if Sam left a note, that means he's not in the hospital with Dean."
"Yeah..." Jack said his jaw clenching. "Let's go see how Dean is." He said, and headed inside. He would kill his brother if he ever found him again. This was worse than leaving the first time. How could he do that while Dean was still recovering. He got not wanting to be part of that life anymore but damn, he could at least grow up and handle it better.
The nurse just finished checking his dressings, while Dean distracted himself by looking at the menu. The doctor was now cautiously optimistic and willing to let him try a 'soft' diet. And no beer on the menu. "Hey." He said when Kaylie and Jack came in. His voice was hoarse and scratchy, but it was there. "Get this, I get room service. Shitty room service, but room service. Rumor is they're going to let me out of bed tonight."
"That's great." Jack said as he took a seat beside the bed. "So, when they let you out of here, how about I drive us all back to Texas for a while?" He didn't know if he should bring up the Sam situation yet. He didn't have details, and for all he knew the man could be crashed at a hotel somewhere, but he doubted it. He stared at the piece of paper trying to make the decision on what to do.
Dean looked at the paper in Jack's hand. "That from Sam? Hopefully he left it with my car, or no amount of sedatives will stop me from hunting his ass down." He said with an attempt at humor, t hough it didn't reach his eyes. He knew his brother was gone. He knew that last night as the drugs hit him.
"Ahm, yeah." Jack said handing over the note. "So he's taken off again?" He asked, wondering what was wrong with Sam's head that he didn't see what this was doing to Dean. It made no sense to him. But then Jack had never had a brother growing up. He didn't take it for granted now that he had one... two he supposed but he knew Sam about the way he knew his father. A few glimpses and his absence.
"Yeah." Dean said as he read the note. And he actually smiled at it, reading it on all levels. "Along with the normal crap that it's all for my own good, he actually said good bye this time." He balled up the paper around the earring and threw it in the trash.
"That made sense to you?" Jack asked indicating the note. "Freaked Kaylie out." He told him. "So what's his story on why this is for your own good?" Jack couldn't believe it. To him it came across that it was somehow Dean's fault that Sam was leaving. Something was wierd about the entire situation. He wanted to be mad at Sam and believe it was nothing but childish selfishness, but there was something about it that nagged at him.
"It should freak her out." Dean said. "Because she's not exactly a hunter. Sam found the demon that did this to me and made her beg to be sent back to hell." He said as he adjusted his position carefully in the bed. "It's a long story...well, actually it's not. Sam had a vision that he'd go dark side, like your mom, and end up killing me. Because we know me, can't leave anything alone. Well, he thinks he's already started going all dark, so he left so it didn't come down one of two ways. Him killing me, or me killing him. Course, he left me this majorly huge clue on how to track him, don't think he even realizes it yet."
"What clue is that?" Jack asked, not sure what it was that would be easier to track now than before. Although he did have to grudgingly let some of his anger at Sam go. He didn't agree with his choice but he understood it now.
"He's going to take down as many of those evil sons of bitches as he can before he finally crosses over. All I gotta do is just watch the signs, and then pull him back before he's lost." Dean said, still confident he cou ld do it. Just not right now. And he had no guilt over calling the demonic evil sons of bitches. He'd earned that right at least to call nephalim who went dark that. He didn't see the hypocracy in that. Because Sam was Sam. And always would be.
"How do you plan to pull him back?" He wasn't sure there was a way to do that. "I mean if it were that simple my mom would still be here, and you probably would have fewer scars right now." He didn't want to crush Dean's hopes but he didn't want to have him hurt again either. Next time it could be Sam that tied Dean to a post and tortured him almost to death.
"You and your mom and me and Sam are two completely different situations. Trust me." Dean said. "You were way too young to fight for it, not your fault. I have a shot, and I'll be taking it. So major research mode for me. Which Ben will NOT be comfortable with, trust me." He was seriously thinking of just recovering on the road.
"Why wouldn't he be comfortable with you trying to save your brother?" Jack asked. "Besides, you are not going to be up to driving anytime soon. End of discussion. you can either stay with me or in a hotel in Corpus Christi but you are not driving off to chase after him until you are healed."
"You know, maybe we should table this one until he's released." Kaylie offered.
"Okay, so you're a smart blonde." Dean said with a chuckle. "Jury's still out on whether or not you can spell though. Chances I'll be released legally aren't that great. Too easy to be found here." Wouldn't be the first time he checked himself out AMA.
"Says the not so smart blonde. Checking yourself out before you are ready and then taking off down the highway isn't a good idea." Jack said and fished out his cell phone to call in the big guns and settle it once and for all.
He was calling Ben.
Kaylie hid a grin, she knew what Jack was doing as she gestured for Dean to move over so she could sit on the side of the bed. "So let's see this menu. Ooh, jello. I have a rule about jello. Stay away from the green stuff." She said.
"Yeah, their idea of a soft diet is baby food. Don't suppose you could smuggle me in something? Would hate for me to have to break out just for a sub." Dean said with a grin.
Ben was in his club, when his cell rang he ducked into his office. "What's up Jack?" He said, recognizing Jack's ringtone on his phone.
"Couple things, mostly just updates." He said and filled him in on Dean's condition and Sam's latest disappearance and excuses. "So, Dean isn't going to be able to stay here much longer, all things being equal." Like demons coming for him and the government once the swelling in his face went down enough for him to be recognizable as himself to strangers. "Thinking about bringing him home like a stray. What do you think?"
"Last stray you brought home I made you keep in the shed." Ben said dryly. Though Jack did have a point. "You asking me or you asking me to convince him?"
"Both actually." Jack said. "And the shed is out. I'm not rousting the spiders out of there. They are evil and outnumber me."
Ben laughed. "Fine. But I'm not turning down the heat." Ben said. Yes, in Texas, he had the heat on year round. Jack had adjusted quite nicely. "When he's ready to leave, call me and I'll pack him up. I know a thing or two about handling boys who think they know better than adults."
Jack laughed in turn. "Sounds good. I will call you when he's ready to go. " He said his good byes and hung up the phone looking at Dean with a smug amusement. "Well that solves that problem. and just think, it won't be as cold at my place as it is here."
"Dude, you're a brat." Dean said, making a face. "How about you go get me a sub? Make it up to me for making me shack up with a demon." Because dammit he was hungry and he'd use the low reasons to get real food. "I promise, Kaylie's safe. I'm as harmless as a declawed kitten right now, with the sedatives, and tubes and bandages..." he said with a bit of a smirk.
"Man, and I was going to take advantage." Kaylie joked.
"Good luck with that, honey." Jack told her with a smile. "As for you, they are feeding you baby food for a reason. I don't want to bring you real food and have it tear something up in there. Sorry. No go."
"This sucks. They won't even give me beer, I'm pissing into a bucket, the nurses are all over 50, and they're going to feed me strained peas for dinner." Dean grumbled. "It was completely worth living...why?"
"Because if you die, there will never be steak and beer again, and no one will be around to be my best man or chase down Sam." Jack said with a shrug. "But hey, if strained peas are a fate worse than death... you can always hope that what's her name drowns in them in hell."
"Why do you have to be so reasonable?" Dean asked with a chuckle.
"It's a natural charm." Kaylie said with a grin and kissed Jack's cheek.
"Fine, I'll live. Just for the bachelor party. Which Sam will be there for." Dean said confidently. Because he knew his 'mission' in life, even if the others, everyone else in fact, told him it wasn't. Protect Sammy. Save Sammy. Somehow. Some when. He wasn't giving up on that, or Sam.
"I'm reasonable because I was raised an only child." He said. "And my temper tantrums were dealt with by a flaming demon. " Not that Ben had ever lost his temper with him, really. Because of him yes, at him no.
"Hey, I was an only child once. For four years." Dean said with a chuckle. "That's gotta count for something, right? Fine, strained peas, no hot nurses, recuperating with a fire demon...he better not have that whole rule on no co ed sleep overs."
"Highly unlikely." Kaylie said with a laugh.
The next few days seemed to drag by, but as Dean's features returned to normal, and the staff started to pay more attention to him, Jack became more worried. "Maybe it's time to go ahead and bust you out of here. Any ideas how to do that with the glass walls we got going on here?"
"Easy. I'm allowed to walk around. They're encouraging it. So I get up, pay off a tech to wear my heart leads...and walk out." Dean said with a shrug, carefully getting out of bed. "Kaylie, take the stuff down to the car, tell them it's laundry or something if they ask. Jack, flirt with a nurse."
"You are too good at this." Jack said shaking his head, then kissed Kaylie. "Don't kill me honey, she doesn't mean a thing." He said, waggling his eyebrows as he headed out into the hall and over toward the nurses' station to perform his brotherly duty.
Kaylie laughed and gathered up Dean's stuff as Dean found his boots and pulled them on. Looked pretty ridiculous with a hospital gown, but it was hopefully temporary. Then he paid off a tech, got the key to the med room, took dressing supplies and antibiotics (he had enough pain killers in the trunk) and carefully transferred his leads from his chest to the tech's chest, grabbing a pair of scrubs. Then he hopped on the elevator and headed down to the car, where Kaylie was fixing up the back seat with pillows and blankets.
"God, you're needy." He teased her.
"This is where you're going." She informed him.
"That's my girl." Jack said as he caught up with them. "And if you behave, I will let you pick the music even if I am the driver." He told his brother. "Do you have enough pain killers in your system? Anything we need on the way out of town?" He asked, opening the driver's side door to get in.
Dean stood there in shock. "Whoa, wait. Excuse me? Um, who's driving? Back away from the door. I mean it, bro." Dean said, heading over to the driver's side. "Keys." He said, holding out his hand.
"You are wounded, under the influence, and had a hard time standing. Not a chance. Either you stretch out in the back seat or you get to ride home with Ben. Come on... I have driven her before. I'll take care of your baby, now lay down already so we can get the hell out of here."
"The longer we stand here, the more likely it is we're caught." Kaylie pointed out, claiming the passenger side. "Or, more correctly, you're caught. I see four point restraints in your future without any of the possibly fun side benefits."
Dean grumbled and growled and crawled into the back seat. It was easier to lay down than stand. He was sure it would have been just as easy to sit though. "Fine." He muttered. "Don't let her pick the music!"
"Nah, I will save that for when you are really bad." He told Dean as he started the Impala. "She likes Kelly Clarkson. I think you have that CD with you, don't you baby?" He asked her with a wink. "Four point restraints huh?"
"I want to look at her, not listen to her." Dean grumbled.
"Oh, Kelly Clarkson, Gwen Stefani, even have some Cher and Bette Midler." Kaylie said with a grin. "And four point restraints. So completely amazing how they just kinda leave them laying around in a hospital."
"Not listening!" Dean said. "Not in my car! Especially not while he's driving!"
Jack laughed. "You nicked four point restraints? Damn, I knew there was a reason I love you. He's behaving. We'll save the chick music until he gets uncooperative again. For now," he said as he picked up a tape from Dean's box at random, "we'll start with this." He put it in and pulled out of the parking lot and toward the back roads.
"Megadeath?" Kaylie said dubiously. "Never heard of them."
"That's it." Dean said from the back. "She goes. She has to walk." He was half joking at any rate. "How far is it to Texas?"
"Oh, only about three days." Kaylie said with a laugh as she passed him back a soda to take his antibiotics with.
"Look at it as expanding her horizons." Jack suggested. He did his best to keep things comfortable for his brother. He knew it wasn't the best of situations, and that Dean should have been in the hospital for another week at least. It made him nervous. He worried that this was a big mistake, but not so big a mistake as letting Dean be recognized.
He was wearing a new face this time, unrecognizable to Sam, even if the voice was familiar. Not that it was John's, but the undercurrent his voice (the demon's) had always contained was there.
"Distressing times." He said, walking into Sam's hotel room. "When one turns on his own."
"Yeah, that's what I've heard." Sam said as he twisted the top off of a beer and propped himself up against the head board of the bed, and started flipping through the channels. "Is this where you start trying to rearrange our little bargain?" He asked, not bothering to keep the hatred out of his tone. Meg had done all the planning and hard work when it came to torturing his brother, but Sam hadn't forgotten who was on the other end of the phone when he called.
"My boy, you need to think about the path you're on." He said, standing at the foot of the bed, deliberately blocking the television. "Because you are not invincible." Case in point, mere human Dean had killed two of his children. Certainly one was with the Colt, but still. He needed Samuel for other plans that were just beginning to form. "You cannot be a demon and a demon hunter. That's not the way this works."
"And once I become a demon, that will actually mean something." Sam said locking gazes with the creature calling himself his father these days. "In the mean time I am merely the demonic INS." He wasn't afraid. What was the son of a bitch going to do? Kill him? He couldn't get that lucky. "Meg sending any postcards from home?" He asked with a faint smile. He should be worried that he actually had fond thoughts of torturing her. But she had touched Dean.
"Demonic INS. That's cute." He said. "You left your brother behind, a nd still feel the need for vengeance? That's awfully petty. Even for us, don't you think?" He picked Sam up and slammed him against the wall. "You are not on the bright and shiny side of life anymore. The sooner you accept that, the easier it goes."
Sam groaned as he hit the wall. "I never was." He said honestly. "Faked it for a few years but that's all it was. As for Dean, I took care of it all in the day you gave me. Even managed to get the car to the hospital before midnight. Haven't looked back. But I warned you... that I wasn't going to be your pawn just because I let you twist what ever is inside me. I wouldn't even bet on my allegeance when I become a demon. It's not petty... it's the damned Winchester genetics." He laughed. "Vengeance is hardwired in place."
"Do not think you can stand against me." He growled. "You may be special, you may be gifted. But I'm stronger. There are ways to hit you where it hurts without breaking our deal. Remember that."
"And I can still die." Sam said with a shrug. "You can't touch Dean, and I don't think even you want to deal with Ben, so going after Jack is out, although to be honest I would kinda like to see that battle. You granted me free will, remember. Part of our bargain... as long as I leave my brother and never look back I could do as I damned well pleased in all other things. So back off or fucking kill me already cause those are your only two options."
Ben, he was the kicker. A thorn in his side, and one he would like removed from any sphere of influence. The Winchesters had succeeded in sending his children to hell, but Ben had been the one to be able to fight a child like his, and walk away. Hale and hardy. His involvement in the Winchesters' lives was a danger, with what that demon knew.
But that was a problem for another day, and not even one that could be solved easily.
"I have more than two options." He said to Sam. "And I will be watching, taking notes, waiting."
"Waiting for what? Me to cross over and be a lesser demon so you can beat me into submission? Waiting for me to actually give a damn about someone else that you can actually get to again? Don't hold your breath on that one. I learned that lesson back in the cabin. " He couldn't help but push. He wanted the bastard to end it all now. What was hell now vs hell later? It's where his soul was going in dribbles and drips anyway.
The demon released him and backed away, still smiling. "Careful, Samuel. There are worse things than death. There are even worse things than hell. You don't want to find them out."
"You've been teaching me that every day of my life." Sam accused, but the tone was resigned. He had given in, after all. He had chosen damnation, the utter obliteration of who and what he was, over being the survivor once more. The guilt he carried around with him over the death of his parents and Jessica, over the sacrifices Dean had been forced to make over the years, that was almost more than he was able to bear as it was. Dean suffering and dying would have driven him completely mad with it. "Get out."
He smiled and patted Sam's cheek. "Oh you're going to be something remarkable when this is all over." He promised. "It will be such a joy to see." Then he walked out.
Sam downed the beer in one drink, then picked up the computer, begining to look for the signs once more. Needing to prove that he wasn't evil, that he wasn't a demon yet. Maybe earn a little peace for the soul that was leeching away. He scribbled notes in a notebook, looking over previous notes following the trail. It was near by. He had a feeling about that before ole yellow eyes showed up. He took the surprise visit as proof that he was right.
The demon roared. This wasn't a possessed demon. This was a demon. And it didn't appreciate Sam Winchester trying to 'help' it, or himself.
"You think you can beat me?" It sneered as it tossed Sam across the room. It was trapped, it couldn't leave. But oh the damage it could do in the meantime.
Sam was exhausted. He had been fighting this thing for days. He had never encountered anything this strong before, and he was starting to have doubts that he was going to be able exorcise the demon from its host. Not that doubts were going to stop him. Exorcists died during exorcisms. He was begining to understand why, and he was beginning to have hope. A twisted hope, but hope none the less. He picked himself up off of the floor, stifling the groan of pain. He raised his voice once more, to begin the ritual again. He would do it as often as he had to. He wasn't going to let another demon win.
The demon laughed, but quickly stopped laughing, and started to scream in pain when a voice cut through the chaos. Accented, and speaking a latin far older than even Sam knew. The aged man, in clerical robes, and a worn tweed coat thrown over it, stepped forward slowly, as if fighting a great wind. He tossed off his hat and kept speaking as the demon tried to scream over him.
The old man spoke softly, but firmly, never taking his eyes off the demon until it exploded. Then he brushed himself off and offered his hand to Sam. "Father Pavel." He introduced himself. "I see you've been making a mess of things. Did you have any idea what you were doing?"
Sam's eyes widened, and he half expected the man to turn his incantations on him. But he took his hand. "Ahm...Sam... Sam Winchester. I was performing an exorcism... I've been doing them since I was... I guess 13 the first time." He suddenly felt as though he were standing before his father and he was 5, having been caught playing with firearms.
"An exorcism?" Father Pavel said, surprised. "Son, that wasn't a possessed human." He shook his head. "We have much to discuss I see." He said with a sigh and took off his coat, carefully taking off his cassock and folding it oh so carefully and placing it in his small tattered suitcase. He put his coat on, and his hat. "Come, this old man could use some tea. I think your American coffeehouses have been selling tea?"
"Ahm... yes sir..." He said looking back at the devil's trap. "I didn't realize so many were out passing as human... isn't that rare?" He moved to pick up the man's suitcase for him. Not that he thought he was fragile. Even as ancient as he appeared the man was anything but fragile. It was out of respect.
Father Pavel tabled the discussion until they were in a corner table in a mostly empty coffeehouse. He ordered tea, and drank a few sips of it iwth pleasure before turning to Sam. "Not as rare as one might think. Not as rare as you think, though you should certainly know better. No, creatures from hell come in all different packages. Just the ones that possess humans...they tend to be the most visible, make the most noise."
Sam paled. "How is it I should know better?" He asked. This man couldn't possibly know what he was. Could he? Was it that obvious now? No one seemed to know before. He had been in the company of priests frequently. None of them had noticed anything odd about him. "Because I grew up with this? My dad learned as he went. I guess we missed a few things along the way."
"Hunters, always in for the kill. But you do your part." Father Pavel said. "Even as you paint a bull's eye on your back. Or is that the point? That the bull's eye is there, and maybe someone will hit it?" He looked at the young man in front of him, the one with the sad eyes. "I've come across many hunters in my years as a priest. Rarely do they ask for help, even when they should."
"It wasn't about the kill." Sam said. "It was something else." He wasn't sure that it wasn't about the kill now. Maybe it was about the bull's eye. Maybe he wanted to take on the biggest and most evil so that they would kill him before he could join them. Maybe he had made the wrong deal with the demon. Maybe he should have rearranged history, brought his parents back, left Dean with the memories of a happy life as an only child. But he hadn't thought it through. Hadn't planned. Had just wanted his brother to live another day. "Believe it or not it's... it was always been about helping people."
"Oh I don't doubt that." Father Pavel said. "Sometimes I'm not very clear. Hazard of English not being my first language." Or his third for that matter. "It was about helping people? As in now it's not? And that's where you will fail, child."
"I dont know what it is now." Sam said honestly. "Too many other things involved or me to know anything anymore." Too much pain, too much guilt, too much anger and loneliness. How could he really claim to be one of the good guys anymore? He wasn't even human. All he could do was take steps to not be one of the bad guys until there was no choice.
Father Pavel nodded and finished his tea, wiping his mouth with his napkin, then folding the napkin carefully into the tea cup. Every movement of his was deliberate and precise, no wasted movement. "Come." He said, standing up and putting his hat on. "We will walk. It's a very nice night out, even for old bones."
Sam got up and walked with the father, carrying his coffee with him. "How do you tell the difference?" Sam asked "Between a demon with physical manifestation and one that is possessing a host?" Better to turn it into a professional conversation before it turned into confession. Sam didn't have the faith he once had. He hadn't prayed once since the hospital in Chicago. Canting a latin prayer didn't count. It was just words. Words that hurt the demons almost as much as the demons had hurt him.
"With this." Father Pavel said, poking Sam in the chest. "The mind can be decieved, the senses thwarted, but not the heart. I don't suppose if I told you this was highly dangerous, you would stop?" Because he was required to say that. The Catholic Church thought they should have a monopoly on demon fighting, Father Pavel knew better. The war would take all the willing participants it could get to even make a dent. But sending a young boy off to his death because his father had taught him wasn't smart either.
"No." He said. "I ahm... It's not that I don't care that it's dangerous... I just... I'm going to do what I am doing with or with out additional training. It's what I am." For now. For as long as he could make it work... as long as he could hold onto his soul. "What ahm... what is your heart telling you about me?" Sam asked.
"That you're not lost. That your soul can be saved." Father Pavel said as he walked. "That to save a soul takes as long as to lose one. One never loses one's soul in a blink, that's a myth to scare the little ones. You can give pieces away, you can sacrifice parts of it, but you can't hold it out whole for someone to take."
"I'm not human, you know." He said softly. "I don't know how this whole soul thing works for something like me." He knew that it was a down hill slide, that it would get harder as time passed. "I just don't want to go down gently. I didn't agree to laying down and waiting."
"You have one." Father Pavel said. "And some day, if you lose it, you will fear me." Strange image, since the elderly priest with his hunched shoulders and shuffling gait, didn't even come up to Sam's shoulder. "But you have one, or you wouldn't have had it to bargain with in the first place. Strange, that bargaining. God gave his finest creations, humans, free will. Makes us very dangerous adversaries to all that is dark and evil. You are still human, child. If nothing else, the bruises on your face should be a reminder of that."
"I've bruised monsters.. made them bleed... but I'm ... my father was... well... he ... was possessed when I was concieved. It's not just the deal I made. Wow... you can sense that I made the bargain... I didn't do it to gain anything for myself... It wasn't for me." He felt the need to say. He knew that it sort of was, because he couldn't live with the thought of Dean dying for his sake, but it was different too.
"That guilt, that remorse you feel over the bargain, not over the bargain itself, but what you lost because of it, that is why are you human. Hold onto that as long as possible." Father Pavel said. "You are a nephilim, and even you don't know what that is. That is sad. You've signed yourself off, and don't even know why."
"It's the child of a possessed man." Sam said. "My ahm... my brother and I were terrorized by one when we were children. Watched her slide from almost completely human to nothing but shadows intent on torturing my brother to death when he... he was just a 16 year old boy. Just to hurt my father...I've seen what they do... I found texts that say they ... we... are the reason the flood happened... Noah was chosen because there was no demonic blood in him. I haven't exactly seen anything to give me a positive view on what I am."
"If you are going to base opinions on ancient texts, you must read them all." Father Pavel said. "Because they really are nothing more than diaries of the times, passed down for us to learn from. Further research would have shown that God flooded the earth because the children of his fallen were enslaving men. In fact, often eating them. And though Noah's bloodline was presumably human, no one has ever vouched for his daughters in law. When thrown out of heaven, not all of Lucifer's friends followed him to hell, some stayed where they fell, on Earth, finding great joy around them in mankind. For so long there was peaceful co existance, and interbreeding. Then they took on attributes all too human. Arrogance. Conceit. The lust for power. That was their undoing. You were terrorized by one. My child, I am sorry for that, but humans often do the same thing. The difference being nephilim have other abilities that make it seem so much worse. Yes, there are monsters. But even you should know not all of them are not human."
"I know. Encountered the human monsters a time or two. For all of that, a lot of the spirits we put to rest were created by human monsters." He said. "One of the fallen... the one that tainted my conception... has plans for me. He's killed or tortured everyone I have ever loved to bring me to this point. I know he wins eventually... the visions are pretty clear on that one." His eyes misted as he thought of the future that awaited him. That he had saved his brother's life only to take it later. When he became a worse monster than any they had fought.
"Do you have faith?" The priest asked as he stopped by a bench to rest. "It's important to have faith. I have faith, that's why I am alive, while every other priest I've worked with is dead. Heart attacks, strokes, lack of faith." Even a split second of lack of faith could cost an exorcist his life. "Do you have any?"
"I used to." He said honestly. "But I haven't been able to bring myself to pray since the vision. It's been hard since, well, I thought I saw an Angel once... it was the spirit of a murdered priest that thought he was an angel. " Sam shook his head. " Will God even hear my prayers now?"
"Faith and prayer are two different things." Father Pavel said. "Faith is a belief in a higher power than yourself, someone you can fall back on. Prayer is a conversation. Sometimes it seems onesided, but God is always listening. His answers might not be where and when and what you expect, but he does answer. There are miracles all around, they just get overlooked. Everyone expects a burning bush, or the seas to part, or Lazarus to rise from the dead. God usually works in a much more subtle way. Whether or not you choose to talk to God is a personal choice. As is whether or not you choose to put your fate in the hands of something good and righteous, and trust in that. But what you plan to do, child, you cannot do it alone. You will need faith, or you will fail. You won't just fail yourself, you'll fail those very people you're trying to save."
"I believe." Sam said. "Not sure about all the dogma that goes with that belief, but I can't look a fallen angel in his beady yellow eyes and not believe that there is a hell, and if there is a hell then there must be a heaven, and thus God. I'm pretty angry with him right now, but," shrug, "doesn't mean I don't believe." Sam had a hard time not being angry. His own choices were his own. The lumps taken being a hunter were a natural consequence of his choices. But his father being possessed wasn't anyone's choice. The fact that John Winchester was being tormented in hell for sacrificing himself for his son's life was pretty high on the list of things to be angry about as well. He knew on one level that all that he had to be angry about lay at the yellow eyed demon's feet, but God had allowed that kind of evil in the world to begin with and Sam felt pretty much abandoned in the fight against it.
"It's all right to be angry with him. I get angry with him myself." Father Pavel said. "Two years ago I was in Venezuela, exorcising a demon from a little four year old. No child deserves that, the possession or the exorcism. I was angry, heated. I used that anger against the demon. That's the trick."
"Yeah but I kinda feel like I'm out here on the front lines alone." He said. "I know God answers in his own way in his own time. But it's hard to stay the course when the wolf is howling at my door and God says sorry, not now, and the only angels I see are of the fallen variety. Not that I am asking to see one but... well you know what I mean."
"If you saw a holy angel, you wouldn't be able to comprehend his visage." Father Pavel said. "So count yourself lucky that you haven't seen one. There are lesser miracles you can look for, to affirm God's existance and presence if you need to. Like...that tree over there. Or the sunrise. Always overlooked, but no less miraculous."
"I guess I haven't gotten to that point of grateful yet." Sam admitted. "Which I suppose sounds like a spoiled child complaining that having everything still isn't enough. I'm just tired." He said. Tired of running, tired of watching the bad guys win. Like a child he was tired of the unfairness of it. That his family would lose everything to the darkness they fought so hard against only to find themselves tormented in hell for thier troubles after death. "Probably be less whiny in the morning."
"Perhaps." Father Pavel said and handed him a business card. "This has my cellular phone number. The Church likes to keep in touch with me. You will call me in the morning. I will try and teach you what I know. The Church has been good to me, but has not sent me anyone to instruct in quite a while."
Sam took the card in hand and looked it over with wide eyes. "Thank you." He said in all sincerity. "I will speak with you then. Do ahm... do you need a ride back to where ever it is you are staying?" He asked, seeing that his truck wasn't far in the distance.
"No, no. I will walk. Is good for the lungs." Father Pavel said. "May you have pleasant sleep, Samuel Winchester. And watch the sunrise in the morning, if you please."
"I will try to be awake." He said. "Good night, sir." He started walking toward the truck, wondering what sort of ripples were being set into motion from this chance meeting. It was chance wasn't it? Or was it? Did a man of God really just walk into the same exorcism Sam was failing at, by chance ? He wanted to believe that it might be an answer to one of those long forgotten prayers. But that kind of belief came hard now.
He drove back to the hotel and lay the lines of salt and brick once more. It wouldn't keep the big bads out he had discovered but it would keep the little ones at bay, and they were the ones he worried about at the moment. He leaned back against the head board of the bed and stared at the blank TV screen, letting his mind wander.
Ben looked at Jack. "You have to do something. He's YOUR brother." He said.
Dean's recovery had been hard, and it still wasn't over. All he had been was pulled back from the brink of death, and that wasn't a small feat in itself. But it left a lot of damage to let nature fix. And Dean never did well when he wasn't 100.
Add to that, the fact that Sam was out there somewhere. Going through something monumental, by choice, and there wasn't anything he could do about it. So he did what he did best when he was blocking out pain of all sorts.
He fixed cars.
So far, he'd changed the transmission on the Impala, Jack's car, Ben's car, and even Kaylie's car. Changed brakes. Changed the oil. Repaired the dings and rust in Jack's car until it was nearly mint condition. It would never be as cool as the Impala, but it was better.
All the while saying he was fine.
"Next he's going to start assaulting the cars of our neighbors." Ben said, looking out the window at Dean. Or Dean's legs, as he was buried under Kaylie's car repairing a fuel line. Because Kaylie, as stubborn and strong as she was in her own right, didn't stand a chance against Dean when he set his mind to something. Not any more than she stood a chance against Jack. She could see the family resemblance quite clearly then.
"It's how he copes." Jack said. "There are worse things he could do. I mean... look at the cars... they are shiny, happy, functional cars. Was thinking of going and getting a dead classic from the junk yard to give him something to do that won't keep us from having something to drive. He'll think I am coming around to his way of thinking about cars. He doesn't understand Sophie." Jack sighed. "If we try and get him to lay down and recover like a normal human being it would be like getting you to hang out in a walk in freezer. "
"You are coming over to his way of thinking. You just described the cars as happy." Ben said, shaking his head. "I don't think he's coping. It's busy work, to keep him distracted. Because if he's too concerned with trying not to cut his fingers off, he doesn't have to think about anything else. Most people, they just drink. Me, I drink."
"Would you rather he lock himself in a dark room and cut himself, while listening to Sarah McLachlan?" Kaylie asked as she wrote her essay for her lit class. Since she was, at the moment, car-less.
"Is that a viable choice?" Ben asked with a quirked eyebrow.
Jack rolled his eyes. "I will go talk to him, but he isn't going to stop. If we push too hard he will get back in the Impala and drive away. Personally I would rather get a junk yard car for him to work on. After all, his other outlet is hunting. " He pointed out. "And that's how we got into this mess in the first place." He headed out the door to speak to his brother. "So..." he said going over to Kaylie's car and addressing the legs. "What else did you find in there that wasn't mint condition?"
"The undercarriage is starting to rust." Came the voice under the car. "Muffler's only got a couple hundred miles left on it. Should replace the power steering pump while I'm at it." He rolled himself out from under the car and wiped the sweat off his forehead with his forearm, reaching for the rag to wipe his hands off with. "Why? Is she bugging out over the whole no car thing?" He asked with a grin. "I mean, I can let it go. You know, let her undercarriage drop out from under her, have no power steering during a storm or high winds...fuel line could explode...up to you, dude."
"Is it really that bad, or are you that desperate for something to fix?" He asked honestly. "Honestly, it's not Kaylie, it's weirding Ben out." He said with a laugh. "Not last straw weirding out, but he is afraid you are going to start molesting the neighbors' cars." He could understand that it was hard for him. He wasn't physically able to get back out and hunt, wasn't finding any evidence of Sam out there. It was hard for Dean and he knew that. He had lost family, he knew. Ben did too, and Jack figured that was why it was bothering him. It was his way of worrying about Dean.
"Fine. She's not riding around in a death trap. A highly flammable, easily crushable box of Japanese plastic, sure. Not a death trap." Dean allowed and got up, slower than he would have liked, and drank his water. He was even watched on his beer consumption. "I should rob her of her car for a while though. You two dope me up to the gills, I wake up and she's driving my car." He looked across the street. "Well, there are worse things in life than being known as the neighborhood auto molester. Especially that guy, that car is loud in a bad way."
"Isn't that the natural state of being for a box of Japanese plastic?" Jack asked with a smile. "And she and your car get along fine. Look... we're just worried about you, is all. I know this is busy work... something to keep your mind off of things. Can't say I blame you honestly. Just worried that you are gonna implode at some point."
"Dude, I'm fine. Really." Dean said with a bit of a laugh. "Nothing to worry about, just trying to be helpful, you know, before I wear out my welcome and all. I mean, I am living with a demon, and I think if I turn the thermostat down one more time, he's going to flambe me. Seriously, it's cooler outside."
"Are you sure you aren't hurting yourself out here? " Which was really his only concern. If he was hurting himself physically or emotionally with all this avoidance. But he didn't think pressing Dean would help. He would open up when the time came.
Dean shrugged. Carefully, but he shrugged. "I'm fine." He said. "When my mom died, that was the first time Dad taught me how to replace a brake line. When Sammy left for college, I replaced the fuel line. When Dad died...well, I had to rebuilt the whole frigging thing, I don't know, cars are easier. They're...they're something I can do. Something I can fix. Since I can't fix anything else. You know? But I'm fine. No imploding. I'm good."
He really wanted to take a crowbar to the hood, see how plexi glass stood up, but he didn't.
"Cool. Then let's get in your car and head over to the junk yard.. there is something over there screaming to be rebuilt, and I need to talk to someone about something before I do it... and it can't be Ben. Yet."
Dean raised an eyebrow, but cleaned his hands off with that gunk guaranteed to take grease off hands without soap and water. Worked well enough, even if it smelled like turpentine. "Everyone's getting pretty sick of their cars always up on ramps, huh?" He said with a chuckle as he got his keys out. "But I'm game." He popped his head inside the house. "Everyone's cars are perfectly drivable. You're welcome."
Jack laughed at that as he headed for the Impala. Driving would be good for Dean anyway, and he was thinking of changing his life plans. He wasn't sure Ben would approve, so he figured he would bounce it off of Dean first. Besides, Dean was in serious need of stretching his big brother legs. That was painfully obvious. He wasn't Sam, but he was what Dean had. Might as well give him the occasional work out.
"So what useless wreck do I get to turn into a masterpiece?" Dean said with a chuckle as he pulled out of the driveway and started toward the junk yard. "Do I even want to know what you can't talk to Ben about?" Jack and Ben were close, Dean could understand that, Ben had raised him after all. Been there when neither of his parents were, or Dean for that matter. And Dean grudgingly liked the guy, figured if Dad could work with him, he couldn't be THAT bad. And he hadn't done anything worth hunting him over (except fire the really cute stripper).
"I have caught the Winchester Hero fixation. Trying to decide between police or fire department... you can imagine how well either of those will go over with him. Not only do they let me start a career sooner, but that means I can officially ask Kaylie to marry me sooner... move out of his house sooner... Alot of reasons that he won't like the conversation."
Dean let out a low whistle. "Okay, gotta talk you out of the cop thing. I mean, you get sworn in, you're legally obligated to arrest me on sight, you know that, right?" Dean said. "I can see why Ben would be against the whole fire department thing, he's a walking fire hazard. I don't know, anything else you're interested in? Gotta say, we're each against one of your options so far."
"Paramedic sounded interesting. But damn you would be a full time job alone." He teased. "And legally obligated or not ... wouldn't do it. You didn't do anything." Well he had, credit card fraud, grave site desecration, any number of laws he had broken in the pursuit of evil but he could hardly hold that against Dean.
"And honestly, Kaylie might have an easier time sleeping." Dean said with a laugh. "Come on, remember how freaked she was when you took off with me? Now imagine being in an occupation where you have to carry a gun and wear a bullet proof vest, or run head first into a burning building. So you're really gonna marry her, huh?"
"If she says yes, yeah. I haven't asked yet, unless you count once in junior high." He said with a laugh. "She said maybe. Yeah, perhaps paramedic is a better choice. Either way I go, the pay is crap. No one wants to compensate heroes in this country."
"Course not. Then everyone would do it." Dean said with a laugh. "So you want me to stand by with the fire extinguisher when you tell Ben? Think he's got his little demonic heart set on you taking over the strip club or something."
"Who says I can't do both?" Jack said with a laugh. "It's not like he is going to get old and die on me sometime. I'm the one that's going to get old and die on him... gonna have to make him promise to stick around and watch my children grow up. That's a seriously suicidal demon...if he knew a way that would work anyway."
"Dude, what's up with that anyway?" Dean asked. "Because if I hear him one more time wish for a way to off himself, I'm gonna find that way. You know, pay him back properly for letting me crash at his place and all."
"When I was little, he had a wife. I was 3 when I met them and I thought she was his mom. I guess the long and the short of it is that she died of old age and he is having a hard time living without her. He worries about where her soul went because she had been with him for so long and loved him." Jack said with a sigh. "He was drunk off his ass and talking to her picture when I found that out. Anniversary of her death or their wedding or something like that. "
"Wow." Dean said. He never would have expected that. But he'd run into Ben after the demon had immersed himself in a dozen or so years of grieving. He remembered what that had done to John. And this revelation made Ben seem all the more human, and a whole lot less demonic. "I had a girl...once. For a while. Had to leave, a job with dad, he needed my help with it, she thought I was lying, dumped me on my ass after calling me every name in the book. Her name was Cassie. Could be a big reason why I run like hell from anything more enduring than a one night stand. And Dad...after my mom...completely different man. Sam and Jess..." He sighed. "You gotta be the one to break the cycle dude, or we're all going to be miserable old men passing ourselves off as suicidal Ben's miserable great uncles or something."
He laughed a little. "That's the plan. But you can get over it and move on you know. Cause eventually you are going to have a body that won't take anymore punishment. You may as well settle down and set up the next generation of mechanics at that point." He knew that Dean wouldn't raise his children to be hunters. Maybe to know how but surely he wouldn't set them down that path of heartache and loneliness. "But you probably have another...oh... 5 or 6 near death experiences in you before then."
"Got a lot to do first." Dean said. "First thing, get myself off the FBI's list. Somehow. Still working on that. Find, Save, and Fix Sammy. Save the world a couple more times. And get all nieces and nephews flying high on sugar, before returning them to their parents right before they vomit. Because I am an awesome big brother."
"Yeah that FBI thing is the hard one." He said. "Well that and Fixing Sam. Find and Save might be hard but fixing him ... that's gonna take major drugs, a lot of sex and probably electroshock therapy. Maybe the FBI thing is the easy one."
"Eh, life isn't easy. If it was, it would be boring. Then I would have the accountant job with the two kids, a dog and two car garage." Dean said with a laugh. "I don't know, bro, I come from Kansas. Had my family not been put square in the middle of a demon's sights, god, I'd be Joe Boring right now. Then again, you wouldn't be here. So guess life works in hard, confusing ways that eventually make sense. Or someone spiked my coffee with drugs again."
"Dean... I'm Joe Average. Yeah I was raised by a demon and my parents were... well bigger than life is an understatement... But I am Joe Average and my life isn't boring. It's not overly exciting most days but it's not boring. Hell you could make a small fortune as a mechanic. Not too many people do that quality of work with out a huge over head."
Dean laughed. "Dude, your mother was a nephilim, our father was a bad ass hunter, your guardian is a demon who owns a strip club. Your oldest brother is number seven on America's Most Wanted List, and your other brother thinks he's going to become the next anti christ. Your girlfriend is majorly hot and way too good for you. That equals boring...how?" Dean said, still laughing.
Jack raised an eyebrow. "I go to classes, work a part time job, go out with my highschool sweetheart. My hobbies? Swimming, computer games, and reading. Man, I am normal and non exciting. Like I said not boring but not majorly exciting or anything. I like it though. I really do like my life. "
Dean laughed. "Anyone who gets a lap dance before the age of sixteen is automatically not boring. Sorry, bro, I win." He said as he pulled into the junk yard. "So when are we telling the resident firestarter about the medic thing? Maybe I should premedicate."
"You don't medicate enough as it is. You telling me you are going to actually take drugs to avoid the ahm... fireworks?" He asked, and pointed off to the left. "Head down there." He said remembering an old car he had seen over there while on a parts run for Dean a while back. He wasn't sure what year or make it was but it had fins and that meant it had to be old and cool right?
"If this is anything later than a 1975, I'm disowning you." Dean said, shaking his head as he steered the car around debris until Jack pointed out the car in mind, half hidden around other cars.
And it definitely had fins. It was definitely earlier than 1975. He got out of the car, still carefully and went over to look at it. Then he grinned. "The Impala had three good years. 1967 being the top, as you see." He said to Jack as he circled the car, gesturing over to his own car. "The 1965 was a good year. Another good year was 1958. This, little brother, is a 1958 Chevy Impala. Good find! Might be a mechanic in you somewhere." It was in rough shape, but Dean wasn't even seeing it as it was right now, but how it was before, and how it could be.
Jack smiled. He was glad Dean was pleased, but in all honesty it had just been the fact that it had fins and was ragged enough that it would keep him busy for a few weeks without putting the family cars up on blocks again...and again. "Glad you like it. Let's go find the guy that owns this place and try not to have that gleam in your eyes while we haggle."
"Me? Gleam in my eyes?" Dean said. "That's why they make sunglasses dude." He said and slid them on. "Why would I have a gleam in my eye? It's just a car. Sure, it's a representative of the first year an Impala was ever made. Thousands of teenage boys got a new lease on their sex life if they got one of these back in the day. Mechanical minded men all over the world could possibly get an erection just from the sound of the words 57 Impala...gleam, what gleam? There's no gleam."
"You're right. There is no gleam... you're glowing. Be careful. your baby will get jealous." He said as he got back in the car. They were screwed. The guy had only to look at Dean's car and know that he would want it bad.
"Nah." Dean said, patting the dashboard. "She knows she's the one and only. Everything else is just sideline distraction. Don't worry about her. Or the owner. By the time I'm done, he'll think we're doing him a favor by taking it off his hands."
"Then I will leave you to it." Jack said. He wanted to see how Dean would pull that off because he was convinced it was all working against them at the moment, but what the hell. It would be amusing.
"Yeah, just stand back and watch the master at work." Dean said with a laugh as he haggled with the owner. It was forty five minutes later that Dean grinned triumphantly. "Great doing business with you." He said. He'd gotten it at a real steal, they just had to pay towing fees. Of course it was such a wreck the owner didn't think it could be saved.
"Only you." Jack said, shaking his head. "So I figure I could break the news to Ben about my career change tonight after dinner." He didn't like dropping big news during the meal. Then people forgot about food... or it got too hot to actually eat in the room. Either way bad.
"Okay, sounds good. And if it gets too hot in there, and you start yelling back, I can double over in pain or something and distract you two." Dean joked. He had yet to double over in pain. Not that he didn't want to, just that he refused to.
"Yeah... and you want to see how fast Kaylie shoves lortab down your throat?" He said. "While Ben and I take you to the hospital? Man, you turned DOWN the morphine in the hospital, not up. The nurses thought you were some sort of pain junkie."
"The nurses thought I was cute." Dean said with a laugh as he made arrangements to have the car towed to Ben's. "Morphine makes you feel fuzzy anyway. Remember the nurse that couldn't cross the brick line? You think I wanted to be doped up with her roaming the halls?"
"Yeah that was freakish. You think she was one of the demons come to finish the job?" He asked, not knowing that Sam had made the demon swear they would leave Dean alone. He didn't know about the bargain that was made either.
"I don't know. Still didn't want her anywhere near me." Dean said. "So I stayed awake." Morphine took away control, and he liked what little control he had, especially over bodily functions. "But the rest of them thought I was cute."
"They felt sorry for you because Sam ditched you." Jack pointed out. "Couldn't figure out how he was so freaked, refusing to leave your side one minute, then poof- gone the next. And for the record... no one is cute with two black eyes, a busted lip, " the list went on and on.
"Well, apparently it runs in the family. Because I just 'poofed and went' too." Dean said with a chuckle. "You went with me, so there. We all go poof! It's ingrained to live on the edge of society I think, even you. Nothing wrong with that, really. Makes it easier. People have too many problems." He said with a laugh.
Jack shook his head. He couldn't understand how Dean could be so casually forgiving of Sam. Jack wasn't even the one that had been abandoned and he had a hard time not wanting to strangle the man. It was insane. Unless there really had been a deal made, but Dean seemed to think there hadn't been. "People have problems, but people are what makes life worth living."
"You read that on the back of a cereal box?" Dean asked. He spent his whole life saving people, helping people, and still felt so completely separate from them as a whole. Jack really was the normal one of the bunch. He never got paid for what he did, hell he rarely even got thanked. Most of the time he was just arrested for his trouble. So his view on people was skewed.
"Nope, learned it from a demon and a barmaid." He told him with a grin. "Couple of lessons along the way from this guy on the FBI's top 10." He shrugged. Society and people were two different things. Society pretty much sucked. Jack wasn't blind. And yes, he lived just enough out side of it while functioning in it to know that. There was nothing fair or good about society. It was an ant farm pure and simple. But people... people as individuals were amazing things. Capable of acts of purity and absolue depravity. It was people that were worth saving, and people that were worth living for.
"You hang out with strange people." Dean said, laughing. "I don't know, dude, I, you know, kinda like it around here. And, yeah, maybe my body can't take much more punishment." He still remembered the doctor's face after an Xray which showed every bone in his body had been broken at least once in his life.
"Then stay. You don't have to give up hunting just because you stay put. Besides... it makes more sense to focus on Sam right now, instead of all the other crap out there. Dividing your efforts seems counter productive." He suggested "You have seriously marketable skills, that you can use to work under the table so off the feds radar... and when your body can take it again there are always weekend hunting trips. I mean all of you hunter types can't drive around the country taking out what ever you happen to come across. "
Jack made a lot of sense. Pastor Jim had a homebase, his church. Bobby had his salvage yard. Even Ellen's late husband had the roadhouse. And frankly it was lonely driving around the country by yourself. Sam wasn't there, and it wasn't like Jack would sign up (even if he did, Kaylie and Ben would kill them both anyway).
"Yeah, I'll think about it." Dean allowed. "So you sure you want Kaylie there for the big announcement if the whole point of it is to get your adrenaline rush and enough money to marry her?"
"If all I needed was an adrenaline rush I would take up parasailing." He said honestly. "Have friends that have been begging me to come try it out." He shrugged. "It's about helping people. And I just won't mention the money and marriage thing. Besides, if I am going to spend my life with her, I should hear what she has to say aobut this before I do it."
Dean chuckled. "Okay, good point." He said. He hoped it worked out for Jack and Kaylie, he'd seen far too many destroyed relationships, it would be nice to see one that worked. He pulled back into Ben's driveway and parked the Impala. "Definitely after dinner. I think I'm hungry."
"You and me both. Besides we need to break it to him that there will be another car in the drive before we break it to him that I'm going into the hero business." He said with a grin. "Although she is going to be something else once you are done with her."
"Bet your ass." Dean said. "Then there will be two awesome cars built by me on the road. Talk about an ego trip." He said with a chuckle as he eased himself out of the Impala. "Hey Ben." He said. "I have good news and bad news."
"The good news is that you're finally going to, oh I don't know, shower?" Ben said, since Dean had been working on the cars all day. "The bad news being you forgot where the soap is?"
"Funny guy." Dean said with a chuckle.
"The good news is that you aren't going to have to worry about the family cars being molested anymore. The bad news is that we are having a car from the junk yard delivered for him to work on. Small price to pay to save the virture of the family fleet." Jack teased, and laughed at the look he got from both men. "Seriously... it will be worth it. So what's for dinner anyway? We're starved."
"Kaylie's picking up subs." Ben said. "Wings for me. Apparently this new place promises hot wings to burn the flesh off your mouth. Let's see how highly disappointed I am this time."
"Dude, you're weird." Dean said. "But, yeah, shower sounds good."
"You got two holes left in you. Don't get them wet, because dressing changes before dinner time is just unseemly." Ben said as he turned a page in his newspaper.
"Did a demon really just use the word unseemly?" Dean teased.
"Yeah. it was one of my first snobby words too. You don't wanna know how much I got picked on for saying something was just unseemly in grade school." Jack said as they headed in the door. The wreck was delivered while Dean was showering, and Jack signed for it. Shrugging at the looks he was getting from Ben. "It'll keep him busy and out of our cars. "
"There is that." Ben said. "Though you're just encouraging him, you know. It's not like Sam is dead, he's just not here."
Kaylie came in with the food and gave the wreck a weird look. "Don't tow trucks usually tow wrecks away, not deliver them?" She asked as she set the food down and kissed Jack.
"It's Dean's new pet project." Jack said and sighed looking over at Ben. "I know. But it's healthier than drinking and that would be his next avenue to deal. I need him to heal before he takes off again. I asked him to stick around but I don't know if he will or not once he has healed. This Sam thing has him tore up. He just won't admit it. He is convinced that he can save him. If it could happen... I wouldn't have lost Mom."
"Yeha, you're probably right." Ben said. "And I guess he needs time to adjust to that. Maybe he would have been better off if we told him Sam was dead."
"You know, rude to talk about people while they're showering." Dean said, coming out in clean clothes and removing the plastic wrap from his remaining dressings. "And it wouldn't have been better."
"So next time we ... talk about you while you are out there under what's left of the hood of the new ... old... Impala out there." Jack said "I'm starving, lets eat" He wanted to avoid any more confrontation until after they had thier sandwiches devoured. He took a seat and focused on the food, mostly ignoring the conversation around him unless he was directly spoken to, and even then it took a little to get his attention.
They tried to include him in their conversation, which was about nothing, but Jack was distracted. Until finally the sandwiches and wings were finished and Kaylie sat next to him. "Baby, I'm pregnant." She said. She wasn't, but she wanted to see if he was paying any attention. "An alien with really greasy tentacles did it. And I'm leaving you to become a Melissa Etheridge groupie."
Jack's eyes widened and his head popped up at her first sentence, everything else was forgotten, including the rest of her words. "What?" He asked. "Okay... ahm... I thought we were you know.. .careful and that you ... you know... but okay... ahm... I guess we ... wow... baby?" He asked, paling a little. "I ahm... wow... really? okay... I ahm... wow... Baby... oooh boy... okay... how far along?"
Dean threw a sub crust at his head. "She's not pregnant you dolt. Unless she's cheating on you with an alien and is a closet lesbian on top of that. Though, you know, girl on girl can be pretty hot." He said.
"Sorry." Kaylie said. "Just trying to get your attention. Dean said you had an announcement now that we're done eating. Actually, he said that twice, with throat clearing and everything."
"Maybe he's leaving you to be an Elton John groupie." Ben suggested.
Jack blushed deeply. "Sorry." He said to Kaylie for not listening, "But in my defense, the words I'm pregnant... tends to turn a man's brain off for a moment while it processes." He laughed a little. "Actually what I wanted to talk to you about was the fact that I've rethought my career path. I'm going to go and talk to some people tomorrow about becoming a paramedic."
"Paramedic? Wow." Kaylie said, then she smiled. "I think you'll be good at it. Been practicing on him for a few weeks now."
Ben blinked a few times. "Well, uh. Okay. Thought you might say something else." Like hey Ben, I'm running off with Dean to become a full fledged hunter! Ain't that great! "Paramedic. Honorable. Pay is crap."
"Yeah, no one wants to properly compensate heroes in this world." He said with a shrug. "The pay is crap but it's enough to make a life on. And if not I can always play bouncer on the weekends." He teased with that one. Ben rarely needed any one bounced and usually he did it himself. With a look."But I think I will be happier doing that than I would in some office some where. Or running a store."
"Yeah you probably will." Ben said. "Well, guess I should be thankful I wasn't paying for your college, huh?"
"And there's the demonic version of tact." Dean said.
"Hey, my college hasn't gone to waste. I still have to have a college degree. " He said with a laugh. "That's part of what I am going to go find out, what will transfer over to the new major and what won't, and then there is the EMT course that I can take and start working, since it adds to my degree AND pays... it can't pay any worse than Game Depot."
"Baby nothing pays worse than the Game Depot." Kaylie said, laying down with her head in his lap. "Except, maybe, my job." She said with a laugh.
"Got you both beat. I don't get anything but trouble with my job." Dean said.
"And I'm actually a millionaire in several off shore numbered accounts." Ben said. Of course, he'd had years and years to accumulate it all.
"Yeah, not that it shows." Jack said with a smile. "And I keep telling you, Dean, you should set yourself up as a mechanic once you are recovered. You would make better money than Kaylie and I combined." He stroked Kaylie's hair gently. "So you okay with this?" He asked her. "It really does seriously change my earning potential."
"Give me a little credit!" Kaylie said. "If I was after money, I'd so be doing Ben." Which made Dean laugh to the point where he had to hold his side.
Jack had to laugh at that too. "That wasn't how I meant it, honey." He said, trying to stop lauging at the imagery of Kaylie and Ben. That was about as likely as Kaylie and Dean. "I just meant that you know...we had talked about things ... almost made plans... and I didn't want to just go and change everything if you weren't on board."
"I'm fine with it." Kaylie said. "We'll just downscale the plans a bit. There are still plans though." She said with a smile.
"I think I'm going to be sick." Dean said with a shake of his head as he drank his beer.
"That's just because your girl has 4 wheels instead of 2 legs." Jack said with a grin. "If you got a real girl, you wouldn't feel nauseated every time people have a boy-girl conversation."
Sam finished off his third beer and got the courage to dial the familiar number. "Hey Bobby, it's Sam."
"Sam?" Bobby said and put his own beer down. He recognized the voice. "How are you doing? Where are you? Dean's been worried sick over you. What have you done this time?"
"What you told me not to." Sam admitted. "I just wanted to find out how he was doing... if he was healing okay... you know... if they were leaving him alone."
"Sammy..." Bobby said with a sigh. "He's in Texas. With Jack. He drug Dean's ass back there once his face started returning to normal. Heard from him last week, wanting to know if I heard from you in fact. He's...okay. As good as can be expected. I expect some days are better than others. What are you doing now, Sam?"
"Sending Demons back to hell." He said. "The ahm... Demon said if I went near Dean he would reverse the process and kill him slowly. I gotta stay away." He said. The loneliness and sorrow coming through in his voice. "I don't want to Bobby, but I have to. But hey," he said swallowing hard, "I'll send as many of the bastards home before I go all dark side as I can. You ahm... you remember how Dad got rid of Maggie, right? "
Bobby sighed. "Vaguely." This was worse than he thought. John would be rolling over in his grave (if he had one) at the thought of his boys being separated like this. "Ben found it. Last I knew, your daddy had it."
"Ben will still know... if Dad kept it, it would be in his truck. " Sam lay his head back against the head rest of the bed. "When it happens... don't let Dean be involved. I don't care if you have to drug him senseless or chain him in the basement... he can't be involved... it'll kill him. Dad should never have told him to do it. It's not right. You shouldn't have to put down people you love, even if they are monsters. "
"And it'll kill your brother once he realizes you traded yourself for him." Bobby said somberly. "Did you think about that? A few good years and then he's probably going to blow his head off. Or make you kill him."
"I didn't tell Dean that. I told him that I had started to slide into darkness and that was why I took off. Don't you dare tell him the truth, Bobby. There is no good reason to tell him. He thinks it started before I left in Texas. I want him to keep thinking that. Jack's good for him. They hit it off pretty well, didn't they?" He had to hope. Had to keep some small grain of hope that Dean was going to be alright. "They tortured him to get to me. I couldn't let him die because of me. They've taken everyone else ... I couldn't let them take him, too."
"Sam, it's really admirable what you did. I know you love your brother a lot." Bobby said, shaking his head as he poured out some dog food for Rumsfeld. "But if you truly go dark, Dean's gonna be right on your ass. You know it. Because if you go really dark, you're going to want that."
"That's why I'm counting on you, Bobby. It'll be obvious, cause I will want him to know that it's me." He said, wiping at his eyes. "But hey, we could get lucky and I could make the yellow eyed son of a bitch finish things off for me. " He laughed softly. "Exorcising Meg almost did it. If I get too many of his kids he'll flip nicely. "
"I hope you know what you're doing." Bobby said. "Too many exorcisms alone by laymen cost a piece of the soul each time." He hoped Father Pavel had found him, like he'd asked. Cashed in some serious favors for that one.
"Perhaps but at least if I lose it that way... it's fighting the good fight, not just slipping away into the darkness because of what I am. Who knows... maybe the soul will wind up in heaven after all. Look... ahm... let Dean know I'm okay. Still fighting the good fight and all of that." He figured Dean would figure out he wasn't calling him because of the fear his brother would trace him through the phone. "But ahm, I'm gonna call it a night. I have a sunrise to watch in the morning."
Bobby barely refrained from chuckling. Father Pavel and his sunrises. Proof that God loves his children. Bobby always thought that was beer. "Will do, kiddo. Take care of yourself."