Chapter 3: Repetition Kills You
Sydni never got that many messages in her tumblr inbox ever.
Even if, days after the Caitlin fiasco, they were all in regards to where her blog content had gone. But those who actually followed her were curious, curious if she was even going to write again.
Which was something what she wanted to do. She wanted to captivate people not with just her headlines and whatever video or photo she attached, but her words too. She wanted to prove that she had the power to do all that. She wanted so much of the simplest things.
With her follower count (which had slowly increased over the past week) and her determination, she thought about the benefits and the drawbacks. And the more she thought about it, there was a lot of good to be found and too little bad.
Maybe she'd try again. There was no harm in that.
"It's Jonesy. Open up."
Having strolled through the mall—it was around seven-thirty on a Thursday, so not many customers were around—Jonesy had initially passed the Khaki Barn, but he doubled back when he heard faint music playing in the store, despite it being closed. He knew it couldn't be the Clones in there. They didn't play music. (He would know, since he'd been in there more than enough after hours.)
Moments later, part of the store's screen opened and Sydni poked her head through. "Hi there."
"Could you do me a favor and let me in?"
Sydni smirked. "Hmm…Why should I?"
He tilted his head to the side. "'Cause I'm a friend."
"How good of a friend?"
He narrowed his eyes.
Her smile widened as she acted less mischievous. "I'm kidding… I think."
(It certainly wasn't hard for her to get on antagonistic-esque terms with him. It was in his nature to bring out his friends' more combative sides.)
He walked into the store, asking, "Know where Nikki is?"
She pointed in the direction of the dressing stalls. "She's in one of those."
"'Kay, thanks."
She nodded her head.
It didn't take Jonesy a long time to figure out which stall Nikki was hiding in. She was always in the one to the far left. Always. It was her safe haven.
He knocked on the door, only for it to swing open because she forgot to put the lock on it.
As soon as he set foot into the tiny space, he found her sitting in the corner reading a book. Normally, he'd ask what she was reading, but, her eyes wide, she was obviously startled by him. She quickly put her book aside and stood up.
"I didn't know you'd be dropping by."
He smirked. "Well, here I am—in the flesh."
She rolled her eyes playfully. What a goof, she thought. Moving towards the door, now that she remembered to actually lock it, she asked, "So why are you really here?"
"What? A guy can't visit his girlfriend out of the blue?"
She cocked an eyebrow.
"Okay. I just wanted to talk."
"About what?"
"Anything. I just wanna hang with you, 'cause I didn't really get to today."
She cracked a smile. "Okay, fine."
He stepped closer to her, closer and closer until she was backed against a (literal and figurative) wall. He gave her a kiss on the cheek, then trailed down to her neck.
"Jonesy, I thought you wanted to talk," she said, running her fingers through his hair as his lips lingered on her neck, causing her skin to feel warm and good.
"I wanted to, but then I decided kissing you was better." He pressed his lips on her skin again.
She didn't fight it.
She loved the feel of his breath against her neck, the way it felt against her skin when he did talk. Sometimes he talked too much and thought too little, but this was certainly not the time nor the place to complain about that. Maybe she would joke about it on the phone later. They talked about any- and everything anyway.
"I liked that conversation we had last night." His breath warmed her neck again, burning her up.
There were so many things he wanted to do with (and to) her since they started talking on the phone at night. So many feelings had been stirred from midnight to three o'clock in the morning. It was ridiculous how much he wanted to kiss her, how constantly he thought about it. How he wanted to act on those thoughts but couldn't.
She resisted the urge to let out a small moan, speaking instead. "I did, too."
He raised an eyebrow. "Oh, really?"
"Really."
"Really?"
"Really—now shut up and make out with me."
He purred. "I like where this is going."
She pressed her lips against his, sending goosebumps across his skin. As they kissed for what felt like an infinite amount of time, those late-night hours of wanting to be trapped in the same space as one another slipped out of existence.
After she gently bit his bottom lip and parted from him, he whispered, "I take that back, I love where this is going."
"You're such a dummy, but I love it, too. I… I love this. I love whatever we've got going on right now."
Though not sure whether he should have been insulted or delighted at being called stupid—and pretty fascinated that she (of all people) used the word love that many times in a sentence—he whispered back, "I love you and I more."
He recalled telling her something along those lines during one of their phone conversations, telling her that he always wanted her to be his. As he pulled her closer—pulled her body closer and wrapped his arms around it, moved her face closer and kissed her on her open mouth—and pushed the world away, that's all it became. Them.
"When you use it like that, it becomes you and me."
(Grammatical errors never went unnoticed—it was the story of an aspiring travel writer's life.)
"Close enough."
Just when he couldn't be any happier, she jumped onto him and he caught her, wrapping her legs around his waist and throwing her arms over his shoulders. "Is this the girlfriend stuff I was doing in that dream of yours?"
He kissed her lips hard, shouting YES! in his head.
Meanwhile, Sydni paced back and forth. She wanted to make up with her confused followers. She wanted to prove her skill as a writer. She wanted a story to tell. She wanted to move past her idling worries. But how? What would she write?
She ran a hand through her hair and turned her music down a little bit. She only ever turned music down (or off) to get a grip on her thoughts, and it was now time to put a reign on them and herself. Upon turning down her music and in the midst of her thinking—scrambling to put words and interesting topics together—she faintly heard kissing and a moan or two.
Don't you dare, the sane voice in her mind told her. Like a "friendly reminder" of sorts, the flicker of frustration in Nikki's eyes from the other day, when Caitlin had been upset, played like a short film.
The side of her that wanted to strive so much—the too-obstinate part of herself she sometimes longed to get rid of—told her that "everyone loves a little bit of romance in their gossip."
Even though her moral compass was telling her to not go through with her plans, she found herself kicking it to the side and (not entirely) wanting to write what she knew. She kicked it in favor of writing what she knew others would be into. So she walked as lightly as she could, careful not to let Jonesy and Nikki hear her.
She looked in the crack of the stall and saw Nikki wrapped around Jonesy. The image of her frustrated eyes invaded Sydni's head again, but she brushed it off. She took a couple pictures through the crack of the stall and ran back to the cash register, pretending nothing happened.
Making pretend.
My moral compass is going to kick my ass.
The snickers and the points at Nikki had been incessant the next day at the mall, and it was annoying. She had never flipped so many people off ever until today. Walking through the mall in the summertime already meant walking among hormonal teenage dragons and adults with too much free time, but now that was multiplied by infinity.
As she walked, greeted by snickering and snorts that weren't uniquely hers, she rolled her eyes. So this is what I have to look forward to all day. Wow, she thought. Just when she couldn't be more annoyed, a certain clique of girls walked by.
"Hey, Nikki. Caught a case of mono lately?" Mandy asked, mockingly smacking her lips.
She raised an eyebrow. "Excuse me?"
Tricia and her friends merely laughed at her confusion.
"Okay, Tricia, what's up?" She crossed her arms while Tricia played a game of naivety.
"Oh, nothing much. Nothing's up but the sky," she said, and under her breath she continued, "and the internet."
What's that supposed to mean? Nikki asked, "Is it your job to start unnecessary shit?"
Tricia smirked in amusement. "I dunno. I'm still deciding. It's fun being morally ambiguous, isn't it?"
"I didn't think you knew the meaning of the word."
"There's a lot you don't know about me, but a lot that I do know about you," she said as she rounded up her group of friends.
Heather cast a haughty look at Nikki. "Later, Highlighter Head."
Nikki had never flipped anyone off faster.
Jonesy had received another high-five from another guy applauding his "game," definitely not referring to any hockey games since the season was over. Then again, he had been getting winks and flirty remarks from some pretty girls (whom he hadn't known were snickering behind his back moments later), so maybe it was that sort of game.
Despite not having the slightest idea why this was happening, it put a pep in his step. So much of a pep that he could have almost skipped his way to the Big Squeeze. He took his seat at his friends' table, some of them giving him curious looks, only some because Sydni wasn't present and Jude was mindlessly on his laptop.
After getting settled in his spot at the table, their stares burned through him.
"What?" he asked.
"What's with the pep in your step?" Jen asked in return.
He shrugged. "I've been getting props all day from people."
Caitlin, handing a lemonade to a customer, asked, "Why?"
"I dunno. Maybe it's just my natural charm. Y'know, there's always been something special about Garcia blood."
"And I bet it's anemia," Jen mumbled.
Nikki came to the table with her fists balled. She hurriedly sat beside Jonesy, wearing a frustrated expression on her face. Before Jen could ask—Nikki already noticed her curious face—she explained, "I've had so many insults and laughs and other bullshit hurled my way today. The next person that says something about me gets a blow to the gut." She raised her fist for emphasis.
While she seethed, Julie walked by the table. "Oh, look—it's you and your boyfriend. It's a shock you're even breathing without him." Even though her braces and clunky headgear got in the way, she managed to blow fake kisses.
Wyatt took a sip of his coffee, calm and collected. "This is gonna get ugly."
Jen nodded. "Very."
Nikki stormed in Julie's direction and snatched her by the collar. "Insult me again and you'll regret it."
"I'm so sorry," she lisped while trembling. "I won't do it again. Please let me go, Nikki."
Before Julie could go, Nikki asked, "So spill: why do you—and everyone else around here—have something to say about me all of a sudden?"
"I s-saw something about you and Jonesy on my dash when I was hanging with Darth. But I swear I don't remember the blog's name."
She didn't recall the blog's name either but offered, "I'm pretty damn sure of who it is."
Letting Julie speed-walk away, Nikki walked to the table, saying, "Jude, let me see your laptop."
He complied and slid it across the table. She typed some things into his internet browser and Sydni's tumblr page eventually came up.
"Well, I'll be damned."
The gang looked at her, interested.
"What is it, Nikki?" Caitlin asked.
Jonesy peeked over her shoulder and saw a couple pictures of their make-out session in the Khaki Barn on the screen. He replied for her, saying, "It's this." He faced the laptop towards the rest of the group so they could see what happened.
Nikki's cheeks flushed with embarrassment. Though they've kissed (and borderline made-out) in front of their friends many times before, the thought of the group staring at photos of her and Jonesy making out so wildly made her feel abashed.
On top of all her feelings, Jude's reaction to Jonesy had been, "Du-u-ude."
"What can I say other than the fact that Nikki finds me irresistible? Especially at night."
"You know I can hear you talking through my walls at night," Jen said, expressing her annoyance at Jonesy's "inside" voice. "God, you're so loud. It's a wonder our parents don't hear you."
"At night? Hear what?" Caitlin asked. This was the one thing she didn't know. At least Wyatt was equally lost.
"Jonesy and Lil Purple flirt on the phone at night," Jude blurted.
Caitlin smiled wide. "Aw, that's adorable."
"Jonesy!" Nikki slapped the back of his head.
"Ow! It's not my fault Jude told. Besides, you told Jen."
"I did not tell Jen. She found out by herself." She blushed again as she quickly added, "I only confirmed it when she brought it up."
"Well, well, welly-well-well. Looks like I'm not the only one letting things slip."
She looked to the skies above. "Why'd I fall in love with a smartass?"
"Excuse me, but I'm a handsome smartass."
She cast him a dark, hellish look before getting back to the subject at hand. "Focus, people. Sydni betrayed us. For that, someone needs to teach her a lesson."
"Wait, what do you mean by 'us'?" asked Jen.
Nikki scrolled through the blog, showing them that what Sydni had posted about the rest of the gang wasn't permanently deleted.
"Oh my gosh," Jen said.
Caitlin, despite the other day's humiliation returning, said, "Maybe we shouldn't be so harsh. I mean, we've all messed up with one another at some point."
"But we didn't pretend everything was all 'smiles and hearts' when we did. We had to confront each other before we could move on, if we could move on," Nikki said.
The gang went silent.
"My point exactly."
Jen did want to talk to Sydni over it, but she didn't want to get too mad about it. "What are we going to do? Are we going to yell at her or anything?"
"No, we're going to explain why we're frustrated and have her tell us why she posted that stuff again," Nikki said as calmly as she could.
"Well, I for one have no reason to be mad at her. She didn't post anything mean about me," Jonesy said.
Nikki laughed for the first time in a few tense minutes. "I wouldn't be so sure about that."
He raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"
She highlighted a sentence from the post about the two of them, then turned the laptop toward him.
His eyes scanned the words in her highlight. "'He spends more time focusing on what others can do for him, instead of focusing on his problem of losing a job every day'?" He stood up immediately. "Okay. It's on—let's go find her."
Before Nikki and the rest of the gang could find the time to laugh at how easily he changed his mind, Jonesy was already walking off. Nikki began walking in the opposite direction. "C'mon, this way," she said to the rest of the gang.
Wyatt raised a cautious finger. "But what about—"
"He'll figure it out," Nikki said.
The rest of the gang, shrugging, got up and followed Nikki.
Moments later, Jonesy sprinted after them. "Dudes, wait up!"