Christina and I finished cleaning and decorating our apartment before dinner. During dinner, Christina decides to go to Will's apartment tonight. So, I am going to Tobias' apartment for a night. The fact that Peter knows about my relationship with Tobias makes me feel uncomfortable, afraid that something horrible will happen later on.

When Tobias and I arrive at his apartment, I immediately tell him, "Peter knows about us."

"Really?" Tobias says. "But to be honest, I am not so surprised."

"Why?" I ask. "We didn't go public."

"I believe Eric told him." Tobias explains. "Now Peter is under Eric and close to him. Eric may make him to spy on and disrupt us because of suspicion of our relationship or divergence. As I know, Eric is still suspicious on your rankings and fear landscape."

"Also, Peter told our relationship to Christina today accidentally." I say. "Do you think that Eric to do so?'

"There is a possibility." Tobias answers. "To spread the rumor and let others question about us too. Eric and Peter do really hate us and want to get rid of us."

"So what can we do?" I ask hopelessly.

"Keep it the same way," "Hide our relationship and divergence is the only thing we can do."

I lie on Tobias' bed wearily and curl into a little ball. Sometimes, I am just too tired to hide and escape from danger at the time. Sometimes, I just want to live without worries and fears, like the days back in Abnegation. But I remind myself, I choose Dauntless because of its freedom. Maybe I can live safely in Abnegation, but I will never be myself and have what I have now, especially Tobias.

"I see you are tired now. Get some sleep here and I'll sleep on the floor." Tobias says and gets a blanket from a drawer.

"No," I say, patting on the bed besides me. "Tonight, I want you to sleep in bed with me."

"Really, Tris?" Tobias raises his eyebrows, looking surprised.

"Well, one day, I believed, when we get married," I lower my head, feeling bashful. "I don't want my husband to sleep on the floor forever."

"Ok, I would love to marry you and sleep by your side everyday." Tobias says with a big grin and lies down besides me.

We face each other and drift off to sleep. Before I fall to sleep, I hear Tobias saying, "I love you, Tris."

In the morning, Tobias and I walk into the cafeteria separately to avoid suspicion as usually. Sometimes I just want to walk into the cafeteria with Tobias hand in hand and sit together, like there is nothing to be ashamed of.

We sit at our usual tables receptively, Tobias with Zeke and Shauna, and me with Christina, Will and Uriah. When I sit down next to Uriah, I feel a tension within the table. I lift my head and see Christina and Will ignoring me.

"What are you guys today?" Uriah says to three of us, and then to me. "They told me to ignore you before you came and didn't tell why. Unfortunately, I am a curious person and I want to know what is going on."

I look at Christina with a puzzled face. I thought that we have sorted the thing about my relationship with Tobias already, but why is she still angry with me?

Suddenly, Christina grabs my hand and says, "We need to talk." She pulls me out of the seat and goes outside of the cafeteria to the hallways with no people.

"Why did you act weak when we were in initiation?" Christina lets go my hand so hard that it's hurts. "You had Four's protection and you knew you wouldn't get hurt with him. But you still acted weak?" Christina says sarcastically. "You are really good at acting, Tris."

Before I could say anything, Christina continues. "Also, you started your relationship with Four during stage two of initiation and your ranking has improved dramatically, how can I believe that you ranking were not because of Four's favouritism?"

"No, Christina." I explain hastily. "You've got to believe in me…"

"Believe in you?" Christina says with a miserable face. "You didn't even be honest with me, how can I trust you?"

After all that scolding and questioning, Christina storms back into the cafeteria and I am still here, sitting on the floor against the wall. Why can't she believe in me? Why people keep judging and questioning me? I look at the ceiling and tears are gathering in my eyes. Maybe I seem strong and brave on the outside, but sometimes I still have Abnegation in my blood, making me weak and fragile. I sit there for sometime until I hear people coming out of the cafeteria. I wipe off the tears on my face and walk back to my apartment, like a normal Dauntless will do.