Steve woke at SHIELD medical bay. It took him a long time to register what had happened, and he had a rare moment of clarity. He looked up slowly at Tony, whose eyes were puffy and rimmed with red from crying. Steve just stared at him for a while. "You left me there." he said quietly. "I.. I didn't know where you were... you didn't answer my calls. I woke up and you were gone and I.. I thought you left me." Steve's voice cracked and he struggled to keep his composure.

Tony went to take Steve's hand, but his heart clenched when Steve pulled his hand away. "I'm sorry." said Tony, his voice was pained and hoarse. "I'm sorry, Stevie. I wasn't even thinking and I-"

"I know you've been drinking again." said Steve quietly, turning to look out the window. "I know you think I don't see it.. or that I forgot that you originally stopped. Or that I'll just forget. But I know you've been drinking again." said Steve. "It's because of me, I know. I know that I'm just... Everything is ruined. Our plans for the future together..." said Steve. "That's why you're drinking again."

"I'm sorry, Steve, I am." Tony pleaded. "Where were you, Tony? Where were you that you left me all alone?" Steve asked very quietly, fidgeting with his hands and staring at his lap. "I was out.." Tony started. "Where were you?" Steve repeated, looking up at Tony with eyes swimming with tears.

Tony's heart broke a bit. He just wanted to wrap his arms around his Steve, but he knew he couldn't. "I was.. I was at Black Lantern." said Tony. "The club... and.." Tony ran his hands through his hair. "I got drunk and I.." "What did you do, Tony?" Steve asked very softly. And Tony wouldn't lie to him. Couldn't. But the truth... he just didn't know if he could say it. But he had to.

"I got drunk and I.. I'm so sorry, Stevie, I.." Tony closed his eyes. "It started as.. dancing. Just dancing. There were these girls and.. they knew who I was.. they knew I was married.. They didn't care." said Tony. "I kissed them both and I.. I brought one of them home. And then I found you." said Tony, choking on his own words.

Steve wanted to cry. Wanted to scream at Tony to get out. That he never wanted to see him again. That would be a lie. Instead, Steve simply looked at him. Hurt, disgust, betrayal danced in his eyes. "I want to be alone." said Steve, turned away from Tony. "Steve please, please just listen I-" "I need to be alone." said Steve. Tony let out a frustrated sigh. "You don't get it!" he said. "You don't get what it's like to just be stuck! Taking care of you and knowing every day that you are going to die and leave me all alone, and I am going to be complete broken when you go! I wanted to forget that but I couldn't." Tony nearly yelled.

Steve clenched his fists. "Poor you!" he spat. "Poor, poor Tony!" Steve said. "I'm the one who's going to die! I'm the one that is going to lose everything! I'm the one who can't find his way around his own home, and I'm the one who gets lost a block from his house!" Steve yelled. "And my husband just cheated on me to top it all off, so I don't even have him anymore!" Steve yelled. He was practically sobbing at this point.

Tony shook his head desperately. "You have me, you still have me. It was a mistake, I'm sorry. It was an awful mistake." He said, tears streaming down his face.

"Get out." said Steve. He refused to even look at Tony. "I want you to get out. Leave me alone."

"Stevie please.."

"Out!"

Steve and Tony weren't speaking to each other. They avoided each other, avoiding eye contact. Tony was aching and guilt was practically eating him alive. Steve often couldn't remember why he was mad at Tony, or why Tony was mad at him. Either one. So he was left confused and angry and broken hearted and was forced to ignore Tony just as Tony would ignore Steve.

Steve was having enough of it. He wanted to speak to him, to hold him. At this point, it didn't even matter what they were hurting about, even if Steve did remember. Steve walked over to the couch, where Tony had been sleeping. "Tony?" he asked quietly. "Tony it's... I want to talk to you." said Steve. Tony slowly woke up, he looked up at Steve with a mix of relief and confusion. "Steve?" he asked.

"Yeah." Said Steve as Tony sat up. "What's going on.. are we done fighting?" Tony asked slowly.

Steve smiled softly. He swallowed hard over the lump in his throat. "I miss you. I don't know.. What happened. But I miss you. And right now can you please just.. just hug me, okay?" Steve asked, his voice trembled a bit. Tony instantly did as he was asked and hugged Steve tightly. He just held him there and rocked him. "I love you so much, Steve." Tony murmured and closed his eyes.

"I love you too, Tony" said Steve. He relaxed into Tony's arms and leaned his head on the other man's chest. Tony could feel Steve slowly drifting off to sleep. He stroked Steve's hair and hummed Steve's favorite song to him softly until Steve fell asleep. He continued to hum it even as Steve was fast asleep, curled up in Tony's arms.

You are my sunshine,

My only sunshine.

You make me happy,

When skies are gray.

You'll never know, dear

how much I love you.