Chapter 4

JJ had absolutely no doubt that if she didn't kiss Emily again before the end of the night, the kiss at the ball would fade into irrelevancy. Emily would be only too happy to regard it as just another episode in their shared pretence, and they would go back to work on Monday with everything as it always had been. They would be colleagues, friends, and nothing more. JJ had always loved her easy relationship with Emily, so why did going back to that that suddenly seem like such a tragedy?

It wasn't the ball that had done it. It wasn't the beautiful dresses or the high ceilings, the chandeliers, fine dining, dancing, or any of that. It wasn't being shown off like a prize—my darling Jennifer, my effervescent girlfriend, the light of my life, my true love—but it was there in the way she spoke those words. It was in the way Emily's hand hovered at the small of her back. It was in the quirk of her lips as she met JJ's eye with a private joke. It was in that goddamn incredible kiss she couldn't seem to get out of her head.

"Would you like to come up? It's only eleven," JJ found herself asking as they pulled up in front of her apartment building, and this time it was she who playfully opened Emily's door for her.

A hesitant smile spread across the older woman's lips as she considered and then took the hand that was offered to her. JJ pulled her to her feet but didn't immediately step back, leaving them chest to chest and hand in hand for a moment longer than necessary. Their eyes met and JJ's were vibrant and teasing—or was that the wrong word? The look they exchanged was intimate, at least, in some as yet indefinable way.

When Emily allowed her eyes to fall to JJ's lips, JJ took the opportunity to withdraw with a satisfied smile, and Emily cleared her throat. Turning her head to mask the colour rising in her cheeks, she sighed, "I've got my go bag in the back seat. You don't mind if I change into something more comfortable?"

"I insist on it," JJ answered brightly. "You'll give my poor sofa a mid-life crisis if you sit down all glam like that."

With an honest smile, she closed the car door and led Emily upstairs.

Ten minutes later, when Emily emerged from the bathroom, she was wearing a pair of jeans and a fresh blouse and she'd released her curls from the confines of her bun. Yet where JJ's curls had loosened throughout the evening, slipping back toward their natural state of straightness, Emily's had grown wilder. With her make up and jewellery still as it had been for the ball, she looked like a different person again compared to her appearance earlier in the evening or yesterday at work. Almost self-consciously, Emily combed her fingers through her thick, dark hair and smiled, shaking her head as JJ took her in.

"Now you're over-dressed," she stated, gesturing to the aquamarine dress that had garnered JJ so much favourable attention that evening.

"I can remedy that if you get us a couple of drinks?" JJ suggested and then she disappeared into her room, emerging after some consideration in a pair of jeans, following Emily's lead, and a loose t-shirt she would probably wear to bed afterwards.

When she entered the kitchen she found Emily searching her cupboards, evidently still in search of glasses. Her back was turned to JJ and so, feeling slightly mischievous, the blonde retrieved the glasses herself before silently slipping her arms around Emily's waist from behind.

Emily didn't jump. Instead, she let out a soft, rumbling chuckle, which JJ felt as a ripple of abdominal muscles beneath her fingertips.

"I would've found them," she insisted softly.

"I'm sure," JJ laughed. Then she pressed her lips lightly against Emily's shoulder before drawing back and setting the glasses on the counter. "I assumed you'd want wine, but have whatever you like."

"Wine is generally a fair assumption with me," Emily replied. "And you?"

"The same."

JJ left Emily to pour and then slipped into the living room to fiddle with the radio.

Something sexy, she thought, But not one of those late night show whose deep-voiced hosts feel the need to remind you ten times a minute that they only play love songs...

She stopped fiddling and sheepishly reverted to her default station as Emily returned. She was grateful to have a glass of wine in her hand again as they sat.

Do you really know what you're doing, Jayj...? She took a sip and then made a hasty evaluation of her own mental competency. Well, she'd held her own against the ambassador, hadn't she? There couldn't be too much wrong with her.

"Do you think your mother will ever invite you to another ball?" JJ asked. She tried to sound casual, as if it were a simple question that had nothing to do with her and she hadn't crossed all kinds of lines by inviting Emily upstairs so late.

Emily shrugged. "She always does," she answered reassuringly. " Whether I want her to or not… My mother taught me how best to act around people like her. She knows I'm well liked in her circle—a bit of a pet—and she knows that both of us can use each other's influence… I'm an acceptable risk to her."

"Even after tonight?" JJ asked and Emily gave her a wry smile.

"JJ, this is the woman who walked in on me having sex on her kitchen table when I was seventeen years old," she answered. "If the ambassador were going to disown me for anything short of a capital crime, she would have done it a long time ago. No, I expect you'll get a written invitation to her next big event..."

"Do you think so?" JJ took another sip of her wine and leaned her shoulder into Emily's, surprised. "You know, I'll come if you want? If she asks."

"JJ, you don't have to pretend to be my girlfriend forever," Emily answered without meeting her eye. "This was— I mean, it was just for tonight. To make a point. Obviously."

"I know I don't have to." JJ replied. Her voice came out more sharply than she intended but at least it made Emily look at her. "Em, do you think I even would come, if you told me I had to?"

"What? No, I didn't mean—"

"So why do you think I'm offering out of obligation?" Before she could steel herself against the idea, JJ took Emily's hand firmly and wove their fingers together. "Forget your mother for a minute, okay? Can I not just want to see you again because I had a good time tonight—with you?"

Emily stared down at their joined hands and bit her lip to stem a smile she wasn't yet sure was warranted. "I suppose it's not impossible..." she acquiesced.

With a sigh, JJ leaned in to press a soft kiss against Emily's neck, nudging the dark curls back with her nose as she did. The radio had decided to cooperate, she realised belatedly. The music was perfect for— well, for whatever they were doing now...

"Good," JJ answered. "Because I had a really... good... time... tonight..." Each word, she punctured with a light kiss leading up Emily's neck, across her jaw, toward her mouth. But as she opened her mouth to speak again, Emily cut her short with a searing kiss on her lips.

"Even with everybody watching us?" She asked, pulling back with a coy smile and bright, bright eyes.

"I don't know if you've noticed, Em," JJ replied with a laugh. "But there's nobody watching us now…"

Fin