Hey, sorry for the long wait! I had this almost finished a few days ago but have been super busy with work :( But finally here it is. Didn't do too much editing so there might be some mistakes. Hope you enjoy the new chapter! There will finally be some Kurt and Sebastian interaction.
A feeling of relief surrounds Kurt as he feels his arms finally wrap around Sebastian's neck, to finally feel that Sebastian is okay and alive. It feels amazing to have Sebastian's own arms wrapped around his waist as if this last week of not knowing where Sebastian was didn't happen. However, the relief is only short lived when Kurt feels Sebastian tense in his arms and Kurt is suddenly reminded of Sebastian not knowing who he is at all. And if this Sebastian is anything like the Sebastian Kurt first met in the Lima Bean, then Sebastian is probably freaking out about being in a relationship, let alone an engagement.
Pulling away from their embrace, Kurt looked up into Sebastian's green eyes worriedly, hoping he didn't scare Sebastian off even before he properly introduced himself again to his fiancé...
God, it almost sounds like Sebastian and I are in an arranged marriage, Kurt thought to himself. An arrangement in which Kurt is in love with Sebastian and Sebastian is not.
It is extremely odd to stare up at Sebastian and see someone who is familiar but unfamiliar at the same time. Sebastian's handsome face is still the same with the same chiseled cheekbones, eyebrows, nose, and freckles. However, even though Kurt is still staring into Sebastian's familiar green eyes, they do not have the same recognition or condescension that they usually hold when he looks at Kurt. Instead, Sebastian just looks at Kurt with curiosity, fear, and indifference. The indifference is the most painful for Kurt because it just shows that it is true that the man Kurt is completely in love in with, only sees Kurt as a stranger. Kurt is now no different from someone walking down the street.
What is also different about Sebastian is his smirk that Kurt used to want to slap off Sebastian's face every time he saw him at the Lima Bean when they were in high school and Sebastian was trying to steal Blaine. The same smirk that Kurt, surprisingly, wishes was still in place because now that it is no longer there, Sebastian doesn't look like...well, Sebastian. Thankfully, though, Sebastian is just as handsome and Kurt is just as in love with him as he was yesterday or even a year ago.
However, through the way Sebastian is looking at Kurt at the moment, that feeling is not reciprocated. And who knows if his feelings will ever be reciprocated, Kurt thinks to himself, feeling a sense of sadness come over him at the thought that it may never be the same again. That maybe the argument they had just before Sebastian left is the very last memory Kurt will have of Sebastian remembering Kurt and feeling love for Kurt—at least feeling anything other than the indifference Kurt still sees displayed on Sebastian's face.
An awkward silence surrounds them when Sebastian drops his arms from Kurt's waist. Slowly, Kurt removes his arms from around Sebastian's neck and takes a step back. Lifting his right arm, Kurt rubs the back of his neck in nervousness.
"So..." Kurt says, unable to think of anything concrete to say to a Sebastian who doesn't know anything about his life, let alone Kurt himself.
"Can I ask you some questions," Sebastian asks. "You're the only person who...you know...actually knows who I am, so..."
"Oh, yeah! Of course. Ask me anything and I'll answer as best I can," Kurt replies, finally feeling useful.
"Okay, well first, um...what's your name?"
"Oh, um..." Kurt stumbles, feeling his heart break a bit more as he is hit with the reality that Sebastian truly doesn't remember anything. Not even his name. "My name's Kurt. Kurt Hummel."
"Kurt," Sebastian repeats in a whisper, as if he is trying to match the name to something, which I guess he is. God, it's probably just as hard for Sebastian as it is for me, maybe even harder, Kurt thinks to himself. Kurt instantly feels bad for feeling sorry for himself when Sebastian is off so much worse with not remembering anything.
God I am so selfish.
"So, how are you feeling?" Kurt asks, and then instantly feels stupid for asking the most cliché question when speaking to someone who you don't know very well when they're sick.
Expecting Sebastian to roll his eyes and reply with a sarcastic barb, Kurt's surprised when Sebastian just shrugs and says he's fine before walking toward the two chairs sitting by the window with a table between them. It reminds Kurt of the many times Sebastian and him sat across from each other, sipping their coffees, first of the time when they were exchanging insults for insults when Kurt was still dating Blaine and then of the many coffee dates they had before and after they started dating for real.
Reluctantly Kurt sits across from Sebastian, putting his hands in his lap under the table, unable to think of anything else to do when he doesn't have a coffee cup to grasp or Sebastian's hand to hold.
"Can I ask another question?" Sebastian asks tentatively.
Kurt's shocked again. Sebastian, or at least the Sebastian Kurt knows, would never ask twice if he could ask another question. He would just do it, and ask any question he thought of whether it is a good one to ask or not.
Kurt shakes his head to rid himself of those thoughts. This is still Sebastian, the man he fell in love with. He's just...a little different.
"Yeah, go ahead. Like I said, ask anything and I'll answer as best I can," Kurt replies.
"Okay. Well, first, how old am I?"
"You're thirty-one. In fact, you just turned thirty-one about a month ago. You're birthday's January 27."
"Thirty-one?" Sebastian asks, surprise clear in his voice. "I've lost thirty-one years of memories..."
"Well technically, you wouldn't remember your memories from the ages 1-4 whether you had your memories or not," Kurt mumbles before realizing what he has just said. "I mean...uh...I don't—"
Surprisingly, Kurt sees Sebastian's lips curve into a small smile before he lets out a little chuckle, interrupting Kurt's stumbling. Kurt melts a little, not at all surprised that this Sebastian also has this effect on him.
The smile, however, leaves Sebastian's lips quickly as he's expression becomes serious. "Do you know why I was standing on the edge of that bridge? Why I came to Paris?"
Kurt sucks in a breath because he can tell just how important this question is to Sebastian—to both of them—but he just doesn't have an answer. He doesn't understand why Sebastian left—completely left—after their fight; or why he would travel all the way to Paris, even though Kurt knows Sebastian used to live here in his early childhood but he doesn't talk about it much; or even why he was standing at the edge of the bridge as if he planned to jump. Thank God he didn't because I don't know what I would do without Sebastian, Kurt thought to himself.
Kurt takes a deep breath in before lifting his eyes to stare into Sebastian's green ones. "No, I don't. Sorry, I really wish I could answer this question for you, but I just don't know. All I know is that the Sebastian I know is not suicidal or impulsive. He is confident, hardheaded, and happy. He looks at all the facts before even thinking about doing something, so I don't know why he would get on a plane to Paris without telling me..."
Kurt trails off as he realizes that he is talking to Sebastian as if he is not Sebastian but someone else entirely, which, in a way, he is. The man sitting across from Kurt may look like Sebastian but he is definitely not the same Sebastian. He seems more...timid and scared while the Sebastian Kurt knows would have been confident and cocky. It is definitely different, Kurt just hasn't decided if that's a good thing or not.
"Oh, I guess I never thought of how hard this could be for you," Sebastian says with realization.
"Yeah it's difficult but I am definitely better now that I know you're safe and alive and sitting right in front of me," Kurt says, allowing a smile to appear on his face. "Even if you don't remember me, it's still a relief to know that you're okay."
"Well, as okay as someone can be with Dissociative Fugue," Sebastian replies, almost sounding like his old self, except he sounds more depressed rather than sarcastic. "So how long have you and...I been together?"
"It will be eight years in four months."
Sebastian's eyes grow big. "Wow, that's a long time."
"Yeah, sometimes I still can't believe it. Neither can my parents or friends," Kurt responds with a laugh. "Usually, when they see us together we always bicker and tease each other to the point of insulting. But honestly, our relationship probably wouldn't have lasted as long as it has if we didn't because then we wouldn't be...well us. I know this probably makes no sense to you at all."
"No, but it's nice to hear someone talk about me as if I lived before I was found on the edge of the bridge. And it's good to get to know who I was and how you viewed me. It's weird but nice."
"Well I'm glad I can help some," Kurt replies, smiling wide.
"So, you're close to your family?"
Kurt nods. "Yes, very. My dad and I are very close. We were all we had for each other for a while after my mom died so we stuck together through thick and thin. My step-mother is great. She is one of the nicest people you could ever meet. My friends, however, are a little crazy, but you eventually accepted them...sort of."
Sebastian nods along, like he is listening but even with the loss of memory, Kurt can still see the same mannerisms in Sebastian's face and body, that he knows Sebastian is only listening to half of what Kurt is saying while the other half is probably deep in thought. What he is thinking, however, could be anyone's guess. But when Kurt hears the next words that come out of Sebastian's mouth, he knows exactly what Sebastian was thinking about.
"Where's my family?"
The question should not surprise Kurt. If Kurt was in Sebastian's place, he would want to know who he belonged to also. Kurt was even expecting it. However, expecting Sebastian to say it and hearing the hope in Sebastian's voice are two completely different things because now Kurt has no idea what to say.
"...Your—um, I don't—" Kurt stumbles on his words, unable to think of any kind of real response to that question because, well, Kurt doesn't know Sebastian's family. He never has. "I don't know where your family is Sebastian. I've never met them before."