I HAVE A DATE WITH ERIC NORTHMAN!
Sookie went about her day usual cleaning the already spotless house and washing up a the small load of laundry that sat in her hamper driving her nuts, she couldn't believe Eric asked her out it was crazy to think he was interested in her. She walked back and forth through the house looking for something to keep her busy it was only eight in the morning and already her chores were done, Sookie continued to play her and Eric's conversation through her head and she started to wonder why would he ask her out why would he be interested in her.
She wasn't anything special in the looks department he had dated way better looking girls in high school and she was never the most intelligent person in the room so she told herself he could do way better, Sookie struggled with the idea of calling and cancelling their date to save him the wasted time but she didn't know what to say. "hey Eric it's me Sookie you don't' want to go out with me I'm not smart or pretty enough and oh by the way I am emotionally scarred from years of abuse my husband put me through and I'm scared of my own shadow".
She said the words out loud and found herself standing over the sink with the phone in her hands crying, why did she always do this to herself if Tara were here right now she would tape her mouth shut and tell her to enjoy the little bit of fun that life is giving me. Sookie laid the phone down she wouldn't call him and cancel instead she told herself she deserved this a nice date with a great guy and no drama, she walked into her bedroom and opened her closet looking for something to wear on her date tonight and felt panicked all over again.
It had become a necessity to travel light a few pairs of jeans and tops only what she needed what was comfortable things that would help her look plain and blend in no matter where she lived, Eric hadn't told her where they were going on this date but he didn't seem like the type to take her to Mc Chicken on a date. She needed something to wear which meant another trip into town, a cup of coffee and a quick shower later she was on her way into town to buy a dress for her date.
So many things had changed in town since she left years ago the small shopping center that once held Hilda's boutique and a shop and snap now held a Starbucks along with a nail salon and few other stores, it was crazy to think the little world of Bon Temps kept living and changing while she was gone. Sookie felt jealous that the town and the people in it were allowed to change to evolve and find themselves while she was kept exactly the same, weak dumb and useless to everyone.
The way her mind worked drove her crazy she wanted so bad to move past the bad things that she went through to just forget knowing him all together but she knew it didn't work like that, she never told anyone the truly horrible details about things he did to her it was hard enough to tell Tara that he beat her she couldn't tell about the rape and torture she endured. Jason had seen the bruises once and it was enough to keep him away but even he never really witnessed the evil inside of her husband.
Her only hope was that maybe he found someone else and that woman could follow his rules and make him happy without getting hurt, Sookie knew he never really loved her she was always more of a possession than his love. After he would beat her he would always cry and tell her how much she meant to him, he would spend hours promising never to do those things again and she had to give it to him he never beat her in the same way twice. His punishments seemed to get worse each time and eventually it wasn't enough for him to just hit her he needed to belittle and humiliate her and eventually he enjoyed showing off what he had done.
Sookie still remembers their third anniversary like it was yesterday, she was feeling uneasy around him that week because once again her period was late, she begged him so many times to let her use birth control and after the third abortion he said she could but changed his mind before she could get it, a while later she asked about the pill or maybe condoms and he lost it beating her and accusing her of sleeping around. In the beginning she always hoped that one day he would change his mind and they would start a family but as time went on she started to pray that she would never get pregnant again, Sookie knew that even if he was capable of loving their child eventually he would find a way to use it to hurt her.
The morning of their anniversary she woke up to breakfast in bed, a half a grape fruit and two pieces of wheat toast it was her usual breakfast designed to keep her figure in line so it went down easy. When she got out of bed and headed to use the bathroom she found a huge bubble bath with scented oils and rose pedals waiting for her. For about a minute she felt normal like the man who had done all this for her loved her but only for a minute, she stepped out of the bath and wrapped the fluffy pink robe gran had given her as a wedding gift around her before she headed to get dressed.
A beautiful white dress was spread across the bed along with shoes and matching jewelry, he had picked what she would wear each day since the day they married but never anything this extravagant. Sookie felt like a princess as she slid the silky dress on over her soft skin and the feel of the fabric caused her nipples to stand at attention, her first mistake was in thinking he was being kind with all the pleasant things he had planned for her and her second mistake was when she slid the strapless bra on under her dress before asking permission.
She walked into the living room hoping he will like the dress on her as much as she did and when she looked at his face his initial expression was one of a husband who adored his wife, he walked over to her a smile spread across his face from ear to ear and he placed his hand on her back leading her to a table set for two on the terrace. His hand slid slowly over her back stopping just below her shoulders and she flinched knowing what she had done, he caught her response and with one swift motion the beautiful dress was ripped from her body and thrown over the terrace.
He continued walking with his hand still on her back and guided her to the table, she stood waiting for what she knew was coming but instead he reached around her pulling out her chair before he went to sit on the other side of the table and called for dinner to be served. Three men in tuxedos came walking in from the kitchen with trays of food and drinks in their hands, Sookie tried not to look at them keeping her eyes on the table in front of her as shame washed over her.
"Why do you always have to ruin a great time" he started once the men had served the food and returned to the kitchen "I planned this wonderful evening and bought you that beautiful dress and you just go and throw it away." Sookie didn't say a word she knew if she did things would only get worse, "you are the most ungrateful woman I have ever met so stupid so useless" her silence was getting to him he wanted her to cry to say he was sorry and beg him for forgiveness.
Sookie picked up her napkin and used it to wipe a tear from her eye making something snap in him; He jumped from his chair causing it to fly across the terrace and flipped the table over onto her covering her in food and wine. There she was lying on the cold concrete terrace as his fists flew through the air landing all over her body and breaking her jaw before he wrapped her hair in his fist and dragged her into the living room, he pulled her to her knees a few feet away from the kitchen where three strange men were preparing desert and forced her to give him oral sex.
"Hello, hello" she wasn't sure she how long she had been standing in her kitchen stuck in her own memory and she was thankful for the man's voice that brought back to the here and now, Sookie turned to see Bill standing on the front porch with his face pressed against the screen door "I knocked and called your name but you just stood there, are you ok?" Sookie gestured with one hand for him to come in while she pulled a pitcher of tea out of the fridge with the other; "sorry I was day dreaming" she said smiling as she watched Bill grabbed two glasses from the dish drainer and sat them on the table.
She turned to start pouring the tea when Bill pulled her into his arms and hugged her "I'm sorry if I upset you last night," Sookie's heart pounded through her chest she usually avoided close contact with people because it made her uneasy. "Really Bill its fine" she pulled away quickly pretending to look for a lemon in the fridge shaking off his touch "So what are your plans tonight Mrs. Stackhouse because I would like to take you out to dinner," Sookie turned to look at him and couldn't help but break out in laughter.
Two days ago Sookie felt like the lonliest person in the world and now here she was with two good looking men wanting to take her out, the only problem was Bill reminded her so much of her husband that she wondered if she could ever be fully comfortable around him. Eric on the other hand had a completely different effect on her like last night when they danced, her skin didn't crawl and she felt totally calm in his arms his presence helped her forget about her old life and feel like she could have a new one.
"Hello Sookie dinner tonight how about it?" he waved his hand in front of her face reminding her how rude she was being at that moment, "oh well I kinda have plans tonight but we could always go to dinner tomorrow" Sookie said with her head in the fridge hoping he wouldn't ask what her plans were. Bill didn't ask instead he stood drinking his glass of tea looking what she could only describe as sinister, his eyes narrowed and his jaw seemed tight and for the life of her she wished she could read his mind and find out what he was thinking.
"Ok tomorrow then" he said looking at his watch as he placed the glass in the sink "I have to go but I will pick you up at seven tomorrow," his expression changed quickly making look almost eager and innocent but she wasn't fooled by his mask she had lived with one for years and she knew what was underneath. "See you then Bill" Sookie said in an unsure tone as she held the door open for him to leave, Bill smiled as he walked past her making her feel uncomfortable so she turned quickly shutting the door and locking it.
Sookie couldn't help but wonder what was going on with Bill they had always been close and she could always trust him but now she was getting an eerie feeling whenever he was around, she was staring out the window watching his car pull out of the driveway when her body went stiff. She backed away from the window slowly pulling the shade down before running into the bathroom and locking the door, she hadn't felt this panicked in years not since the night he found her in Dallas and right now she could have sworn someone was watching her.
After a few minutes and a quick call to Tara Sookie managed to calm she felt disappointed, she had convinced herself that she was ok that if she showed up she would be ready for him this time she would be strong and brave but her current state told her it was all a lie. She sat at the end of the bed staring into space when she realized what time it was, she had nothing to wear on her date with Eric and she only had a few hours to head into town find something and get home in time to get ready, she ran to her car stopping to check the back seat before she
Sookie made into to town quickly keeping her mind on her date with Eric and the calm she felt when she was with him, the dress she bought was a white sun dress with tiny pink roses across the bodice and it fit her like a glove. The dress reminded her of the one she wore the first night she met Eric of course he was with Arlene then and she had her eye on the bad boy that would later be her worst nightmare, but still she remembered his smile when he asked her name.
After searching for a pair of white flats to wear with the dress Sookie headed home with enough time to get ready for her date,
Dear Diary
I am so nervous about going to dinner with Eric what if he asks about my life should I tell him or what if I see something that reminds me of him and I flake, did he only ask me out because he felt sorry for me after my obvious melt down in the bar or what if he is just friendly. I thought about calling him and cancelling the entire time I was getting ready but he is so cute and I would hate myself if I cancelled, lord help me I hope he isn't just feeling sorry for me.