Chapter 4 ~

She just hung up on me.

Lily just hung up on me.

Cane stood at the window in the hallway and watched the snow fall. Up till now, he'd tricked himself into believing that things weren't as bad as they seemed. That Lily would get over it and see how right he had been to say that they could only be friends, and they would get back to how it was between them. Or at least get back to being friends.

Were we really ever just friends? Only friends? Cane thought back. There had been an instant camaraderie between them. Both were going through divorces at the same time, both deceived repeatedly by the people they loved.

He had always felt a little bad for her. So young, so broken, so jaded already. She was like a delicate flower he always thought. But in getting to know her, he found that while the petals wilted and drooped, the heart of this flower was strong. Lily was determined to put her life back on track and not let Daniel or Amber (his own ex) keep her down for long.

Which was the reason she had a Happy Divorce party when hers was final. Everyone else that got a divorce—him included—was just happy to have it over, and she was ready to celebrate it.

That kiss was a little surprising, though. More because he kissed her. And enjoyed it. A lot. The moment had carried a lot more than the playfulness they tried to make it out to be. Cane had thought about it several times since then. The times he allowed himself to forget that their age difference was too big a mountain to overcome.

How could he not think about it? Surprisingly, they had a lot in common. They had the same taste in music, the same sense of humor. Every time they talked, he found her to be insightful and not at all flighty or superficial like other teenage girls. In fact, when she had told him she couldn't go to a club where a concert was being held because she was underage, hadn't he been surprised to find out how young she was?

To top it off, she was gorgeous. Quite possibly one of the most beautiful girls he'd ever seen. And she liked him. She obviously didn't think he was too old for her.

Pretty heady stuff.

But that didn't matter. The reality was that she was nineteen and he was thirty-one. She was a teenager still and had a lot of life to live. He couldn't take advantage of her like that.

For some reason, hurting Lily in any way was something he wasn't willing to risk. But to hurt her in the way Daniel had hurt her? To Cane that idea was detestable. Having her mad at him now was a small price to pay for having a friend for life in the long run.

That settled things. He and Lily could only ever be friends.

So, why did thinking about her out in the storm driving all alone make him queasy? Why did he have the sinking feeling that he made the biggest mistake of his life telling her that there could never be anything between them?

I was right to tell her we could only be friends. Right?

She said she is fine. She'll be careful. She's lived here all her life. She knows how the roads can get. She'll be fine. Right? Right? Cane turned to his mini-me. I said 'right'?

Mini-me Cane didn't respond. He was too busy jamming to the music coming through the earphones from his I-pod.

Hello! Cane knocked on the little man's head and snatched the earphones out of his ears.

Hey!

What are you doing? You're supposed to be listening to me!Why aren't you giving me any advice?

You told me to shut up. Mini-me Cane looked put out. And since I wasn't giving you advice, I didn't think I was required to listen to you ramble. He snatched his earphones back.

Look. Cane grabbed Mini-me Cane's wrist before he could put the earphones in again. I'm drowning here. I can't stand the thought of Lily out there by herself driving in this weather.

And you're beginning to wonder if you didn't make a big mistake with this whole friend deal.

How did you know that? I thought you weren't listening.

Mini-me Cane gave him a withering look. Dude. I live in your brain. I know everything you think. I thought that would be obvious.

Whatever. I don't know what to do. I mean, she said she was fine. And she knows how the roads can be. She'll get home just fine,right? Good. So why do I feel like I'm going to puke?

OK. Mini-me Cane put the I-pod and earphones in his pocket. I'm going to say this really carefully. And I'm going to say this out of love because I truly care about you. Now listen closely. Cane,you…are so…HARDHEADED!

That's your advice?

No. This is my advice. The same advice I've been giving you all morning. Admit it. You're in love with her, you listening? You're in love with Lily. That's why you feel like you're going to puke. By the way, give me enough warning before you do that so I can pack up and get out of the way.

But Lily won't even talk to me. What good does it do to admit I love her when she can't even stand me?

Mini-me Cane shook his head. Good lord, he muttered under his breath. You call her, you know? Kind of like you did before?Yeah like that. And then you tell her you made a mistake, you want to be more than friends, and my guess is she'll come around fast enough.

What if she doesn't?

What if she does?

Mini-me Cane was right. What did he have to lose by trying compared to what he could lose by not trying? Before he could change his mind, Cane dialed Lily's cell with only one thought ringing true.

Lily, please forgive me. Please don't let me be too late.