DDK does not own Deadpool or Batman
"speaking"
"thoughts"
"Deadpools inner thoughts" the idiot side
"Deadpools inner thoughts" the smart side
Chapter 4: Guess whose comming for Christmas Dinner!
Within the closed off area of the Steel Mill, we find our hero Deadpool sending a hard glare to the Author, giving the hint that the Merc with the Mouth was pissed off.
"Ya damn fucking right I'm pissed off ASSHOLE!" Wade yelled out.
"Yeah that was a dick move right there!"
"As I said before, the Author seems to love to piss us off."
"Now he better not do that again, or else I'll do exactly what that Follower said in the Review" Wade told the Author.
"It's so nice to see that people LOVE US! Speaking of review's what was that last one trying to do?"
"Which one?"
"The one that put up about two hot chicks"
"Ah yes, it is uncertain really. It seems that one is either trying to give us a hint of what the Author should put in...or telling us there's a story we should check out"
"I wouldn't mind to check it out if it is a Story. There nothing more hotter than watching two hot ass babes getting it on in bed, only thing that would top that off would have me involved" as Wade said this he heard a small cough behind him, turning around he saw that Harley was standing there with her hands on her hips and a pouty lips.
" So would one of those girls involved me in it or none at all Puddin?" she asked before Deadpool would stretch out his arm to wrap around Harley's waist and pulled her close to him.
"Nah of course not babe! Cause it would be a crime to not involve you in it." Wade told his hot girlfriend, Harley would give him a long stare with a blank look expression on her face till she spoke after a minute or two.
"I want recorded footages incase I do miss out, and you taking me out to an exotic mexican resturant in Paris." she said to him before giving a kiss to his mask covered lips.
"DEAL! Not certain if there are some in France, but I'll find it none the less for you my hot muffin!" Deadpool declared which made Harley giggled in joy.
"In the name of all hot booty, we shall not fail!"
"Was there any doubt that we have? Then the answer is no."
"Alright, now that we got that out of the way let's continue looking up...oh right! Black Mask an info shit that we were about to look up, let's see what we got" Deadpool said as he pulled out the device that Harley given him for Christmas and downloaded the hard-drive Bane had dropped, then the loading sceen pop up with detailed information," Now then occording to the intel that Bane had gathered from his mercenaries that gathered info, our very own crime lord has been using his underworld resources to fund some money to a mysterious partner that he been working with. Seems that it's been used for one part of secrete underground experiments and other science junk, while the other part of gathering weapons and technology for said experimental stuff." Wade explained while readign through the intel then looking over holo-graphic blue prints of weapon designs.
"Uh so...can you repeat that, but in American?"
"*fustrated sigh* It means who ever Black Mask is working with is into alot of science shit."
"Huh, I knew that BM would do anything to give him an edge to mantain his criminal empire, but this seems WAY beyond crazy. Even for him, all he ever does is threaten and kill people." Harley said as Deadpool would look at her for a moment.
"Uh...BM?" he asked her.
"It's short for Black Mask, don't look at me Puddin. It was the Authors idea." Harley added which Wade could nod his head.
"Good point, now what else this thing got?...Hey here's one, it said something that involves with...ah shit the Titan Venom?!" Wade asked outloud as he saw images of Bane in his Titan transformation, along with one with other thugs that used it.
"Aren't we suppose to be DONE with that stuff?"
"Ugh dude that shit is bad headache there."
"Yeah and that's not all, it look like there are some things that involve other stuff. Like...holy shit..." Deadpool said as he looked up the next intel that was recently updated about a day or two ago.
"What? What is it Puddin?" Harley asked her boyfriend as she looked over the mask merc's shoulders, what she saw was another image but this time it was our favorite Merc with the Mouth himself and a detailed info that said.
Suject: Wade Wilson, a.k.a Deadpool.
Career: Mercenary/ Mayor of Arkham Ciry.
Known Assosiate: Harleen Frances Quinzel, a.k.a Harley Quinn.
Breifing: Subject is to be brought in alive for experimental testing. Use highly extreme caition when engage with target.
Reward: $100,000,000.
"...Fucking Awesome! I can turn myself in and get the money, we'll be fucking rich Harley baby!" Wade said in exciment that he had big dollar signs over his eyes.
"We can buy all the chimichanga's when ever we want!"
"I'm not exactly buying into what that detailed said."
While Deadpool was in his own daydreaming of swimming in money Harley would take the device from his hand and looked it over herself," I have to agree with the smart voice there, this look like the same gig about the Christmas Bounty that Joker put on B-man years ago. The only difference is the money has been doubled, new faces of the people comming for the bounty, and the Author's misspelling error." Harley explained as the dollar signs disappeared from Deadpools eyes and returned to his normal eye lids.
"Huh? What you talkin bout babe? What people?" Wade asked as he pop right infront of Harley with his head right between her breasts, and resting confortly there, and looked to the display of people that were taken interest in the bounty, first one on the list showed Bane.
"No surprise there, possibly one of the reasons why he came crashing our party."
"Yeah, and we just kicked his ass just now!"
Next on the list reveals a picture of Killer Croc, "Croc-y? Why the hell would he take up the bou-oh wait a minute! I think I know why now" as Wade said this he began to have a little flashback of the last time he saw the large reptile man.
Five days after the events of Arkham City
Deep beneath the sewers of Arkham City, Killer Croc was yelling and running down the tunnel with a few flaming bear-traps latch onto his ass. Following right behind him was Deadpool dressed in Austrailian clothing over his costume, a kind that was ment for hunting, while holding a sniper rifle in his hands.
"Freeze mate! Deadpool's Pest Control service, keeping our fair city clean from varmen's like you!" Wade spoken with a Austrailian accent before firing a few rounds at the running crocodile looking man.
End flashback
"Yep, that would possibly why he would want to take a shot for the money. Alright whose next?" Wade asked as the next person came up, when it revealed to be Deadshot he heard Harley made a noise in disgust.
"Ugh him? I still can't believe that I was paired up in a relation with that dumbass. I already gots me a real man here." as Harley said this she hugged Wade from behind, while said man was enjoying how her busty pillow like chest was squeezing around his head.
"Yeah, we're a much better picking to go out with Harley!"
"And not someone that's a Bullseye wanna be with a rip off name from us."
Moving on to the list Deadpool came up with the next person as the image poped up, "Firefly? Meh piece of cake, all we need is a giant fireproof fly-swatter and we can squash that bug. Now who esle...HELLO!" Wade shouted as the image of Copperhead came up as Harely's eyes went wide.
"Oh cool! The Author is gonna put that same female Copperhead from Arkham Origins in this story, I always did like that accent of hers" Harley said as Deadpool would still stare at the image before him.
"And after reading that Review about her and that other chick gotten me very interested in those two...God I hope the Author will add that other chick in this story. So anyways babe you said there were some new people yet all I'm seeing are some from the Origins." Wade told his girlfriend before Harley tap on the device with her finger to slide up the next image.
"Of course Puddin, take a look at this one." she said as a picutre of Killer Frost came up, and in this one like Bane she was wearing her Injustice costume as well.
"Oh sweet, now I got three elemental hot chicks that I like. I'll admit Author, I'm starting to like how this story is going so far...what's the catch?" Deadpool asked with a suspicous look on his mask face.
"Yes, when ever something good happens there has to be a catch for all of this."
"There's always a catch, ALWAYS!"
Not wanting to jinx himself incase the Author has any idea's, Deadpool moved on with the last two on the list, the first one was another character wearing an Injustice costume, " Lobo? That space bounty hunter guy that Superman fought?...Know what fuck it I'll kick his ass anyways, then we'll see who's the real Main Man is." Deadpool said and then the last image would cause his eye lids to go wide to the size of dinner plates, "What The Fuck?!" he yelled out loud.
"Oh you got to be fucking kidding me!"
"Way to put the bullshit of bullshits in there Author, ya rip off jackass!"
The last image of the list was a person calling himself Black Spider, now Wade had known there were a few or something Black Spiders in the past that are possibly dead however this was not like the others. This one is not only new but the costume design was very simular to a certain annoying wall crawler from Deadpool's universe, "This is Bullshit! The Author decides to put in an Black Spider that looks like that web-headed copy-cat geek Spider-man in this story, the only difference is that the red color part of the costume is black, along with those black web lines being white with that spider symble thats the same as the black suit from that lame Spider-man 3 movie, and the eye lins being all red with the shape to look like Carnage eyes!" Wade yelled out.
"Yeah this is fucking bullshit there!"
"There it is, the catch! I KNEW there was a catch there!"
Seeing that her boyfriend was pissed off, Harley would place her hands onto Deadpool's shoulders and start rubbing there while speaking, "Sweety, no need to get all upset about this. You know why? Because your gonna do what you do best, and that is kicking ass and being awesome" she said to him softly while giving a kiss to his mask cheek, and that seem to work as Deadpool was now calm and relaxed.
"Ah babe you always do know what you say best" Wade said as this caused Harley to smile brightly.
"Next time lets do a little ropleplaying of her playing Doctor."
"Paging Dr. Quinzel, we need some sexual medical treatment!"
"As tempting as that sounds it'll have to wait...fucking damn Author" Wade mumbled rather loudly before looking back at the device, "You know we should start calling this thing something instead of 'device', but back to the matter at hand. So someone wants me brought in alive eh? Welp looks like the only way I'll get any answers is from one person connected...Boys and Girlfriend, we got to pay Black Mask a visit" Wade said as he put away the 'device' for safe keepign, but before he would set out Deadpool was suddenly spun around and grabbed by his suit from an annoyed looking Harley Quinn.
"Aren't you forgetting something mister?" she asked in a sweet yet irritated tone, which Deadpool was confused at first wondering what he did wrong till his girlfriend gave him the answer, "I've given you my Christmas present early than I was suppose too, the least you can do is give me some sugar and hot steaming sex. And I mean right fucking now Puddin!" was all that Harley said before she pulled Deadpools mask up and attack his lips with her own which caused Wade to lose his balence an fallen backwards with Harley on top of him.
"Holy shit!"
"She's like a raging beast in heat!"
"Yeah, and I love it! What's his name can wait abit longer, right now I'm just gonna have hot wild sex with my girl!" Wade thought as he proceed to pleasure his hot horny girlfriend.
Meanwhile in another area within Gotham
Deep within the alleyway on a snowy night, a stray cat was digging around the garbage to salvage some food when a sudden glowing light appeared out of no where that caused to cat to get spooked and ran away just as something crash into the garbage cans. The figure turned out to be a man that slowly picked himself up, placing his hand onto the brick wall to help support himself, then the man walked into a light within the alleyway allowing himself to be expose for everyone to see what he wore. He was wearing a yellow and navy blue costume with a mask over his head which only had an opening enough to expose his lower jaw and mouth, he would find his way out of the alley and into the empty snowing streets of Gotham, taking a moment to get to know his surroundings the man would tilt his head back and made a sniffing sound meaning he was smelling the air tll he would let out a confused groan.
"What is this? Where the hell am I?" Wolverine asked outloud with no one in sight to answer him.
Chapter end