Stap in girls, this is a loooong chapter! And as I said before there are multiple POV's. I find it interesting to understand everyone's mind set, especially in a family who battles personal demons.
As I said before I don't own these characters or anything Twilight related.
So enjoy
Chapter 4
Rosalie's POV
Where in the living hell is Alice?
I've been sitting in my car for the last ten minutes waiting patiently for her and Bella to grace me with their presence; and Alice had the gall to rush me around this morning, demanding that I be on my best behavior! Like I'm some monovalent monster, hell bent on frightening Bella to death.
If you ask me, Alice seems a bit too excited about Renee's daughter, babbling all kinds of shit at me about how we have to help her. Alice knows I'd rather swallow nails than help a charity case, but seeing as I was one a long time ago, I suppose I had to return the favor at least once in my life. Shopping just seemed the least painful way to contribute.
With every passing minute that I sat here alone in the driver's seat, the less generous I grew toward Alice's friend. They say first impressions last forever? Well, this doesn't bode well for you, Bella. No, not at all.
"Fuck this!" I spat, punching the horn on the steering wheel. HONK HOOOOONK!
I am fully prepared to storm through that front door and drag Alice out by the scruff of her neck if need be! Thankfully for them the screen door smacked open, stopping me dead in my tracks. Emmett was laughing at the new girl, his arm draped affectionately over her shoulder. I narrowed my eyes into catty slits, my manicured fingernails digging into the steering wheel. So that's where they've been, flirting with Emmett!
I observed the slut closely now that my hackles were up.
Her long hair was dark brown, but for some reason she stuck it up in that god-awful ponytail like she doesn't care how it looks. And that boring white sundress washed out her pale skin, her common brown eyes dominating her plain face. I purposely ignored the fact that she had a very nice body. I wasn't willing to be complementary toward her, especially when Emmett seemed to be gazing down at her with curious interest.
You have nothing to worry about Rose, I told myself. He prefers a polished body, and he certainly appreciated mine last night, I thought smugly.
"Get her in," Alice ordered while climbing into the passenger side. "She's completely spaced out."
"What's wrong with her?" I asked, observing her dreamy expression.
Alice giggled. "Let's just say beneath Edward's Emo exterior lies the heart of a lovah." She made the word lover sound salacious and dirty. But that wasn't what caught my attention. Did Alice mean Edward likes this girl?
I arched a perfectly plucked brow. "Let me get this straight. Edward; you know, tall, skinny, red head with a bad attitude… showed interest in a girl?" She nodded, still giggling.
I glanced at Bella Swan in the rearview mirror, intrigued by this strange turn of events. I had to wonder if Alice misread the situation. Seeing as my brother is a moody little bitch most of the time, I couldn't imagine him showing interest in anything beyond himself. He was incredibly self-absorbed. I wasted no pity on people like him.
I watched curiously as Emmett whisper something in the girl's ear, bringing forth a rosy blush and shy smile. His shoulders shook with suppressed laughter. As pissed as I was at his blatant flirtation, it struck me how innocent and naïve she looked; almost as if she were uncomfortable in her own skin… And with a stab of shock I realized I was wrong! My initial observation was backwards; this girl isn't a flirt, she's a god damn virgin! Of course Emmett's sniffing around her, she's a fucking anomaly!
Call it women's intuition or whatever you want, but I just know Bella's innocence is because she's not used to this kind of male attention. Someone who blushes that hard has zero intimacy experience. I should know. I haven't blushed since I was 15.
But what's this have to do with Edward? He's shown the opposite sex very little interest. As a matter of fact there has been much discussion behind Edwards back about the possibility of having a gay brother, or worse, A-sexual brother. If this were the case, good looks are wasted on him.
"Alice, are you sure Edward likes her? A girl I mean?" The skepticism in my voice was thick and heavy to my own ears.
"You should have seen him, Rose! He was flustered and blushing, staring at her like he'd never seen a girl before!" She threw her head back against the seat and sighed happily. "He smiled, Rose."
I blinked in astonishment. "He smiled?" She nodded. "Jesus, the last time I saw him smile was… shit, I can't recall."
"I know. Me neither."
"Huh," I mused out loud. "I honestly thought he was gay." Alice frowned.
"He's not gay, Rose."
I shrugged, still not 100% convinced. "I just didn't think the freak had it in him, that's all."
Alice flushed angrily. "I wish you wouldn't call him that! That's part of the reason he keeps to himself now!"
I glanced over to see Alice uncharacteristically brood. Sometimes I forget how super sensitive she is about Edward. She never told me what happened between them, and I'd never pry. But secretly I wondered if Edward and Alice hooked up before Jasper stole her away. But until Alice confessed such a thing, I'd never air my suspicions.
"Okay, he's not a freak then," I conceded. "How about an unbalanced bastard?" She snorted, tilting her head in agreement.
I waved to Emmett before we zoomed away and called, "I love you, sweetheart." He smiled and waved back, looking really freaking hot in his tight t-shirt and track pants.
Ah, my man, the big buff football jock. Someday I would be the beautiful, envied, wife of a professional football star, enjoying VIP status and going to posh parties with celebrities and…
"Rose, this is Bella Swan," Alice interrupted my fantasy. "Bella, this is Rosalie Hale, my big sister."
We acknowledged one another, our eyes meeting in the rearview mirror. She smiled sweetly, her big amber eyes squinting like a Cabbage Patch dolls. Oh man, she was nice! Part of the icy coldness I initially felt toward her was fading. It isn't her fault Emmett was so handsy, I told myself. As a matter of fact I had several girlfriends that loved him for just that reason; bitches.
Suddenly I understood why Alice felt the need to take Bella under her wing. There was something vulnerable about her, and she just relocated to a town that eats vulnerable girls for breakfast. They say boys are rough when they fight, well they've never seen what a pack of mean-girls can do. They don't punch, they destroy.
Alice was unusually quiet, twisting her fingers in her lap and biting her lip as we sped off down the interstate.
"Edward looked at me," she mumbled distractedly.
I peeked sideways at her. "Come again?"
"He looked at me without turning away," she explained. "There was something in his eyes, like regret. I think he's going to apologize."
"Well, if he's planning on apologizing then he'd better do a group announcement. Emmett's still pissed at him for last night." Alice frowned, remembering it. Edward flung his plate at Rose in a fit, and anyone who crosses Rose gets a ration of shit from Emmett.
Alice sighed heavily, glancing over her shoulder at Bella for the gazillionth time. Apprehensive hope shone in her dark eyes, and it had me concerned. It was obvious that Alice was pinning all her hopes on this girl. But if Bella fails, or Edward decides he doesn't like her after all… which is what I secretly suspect will happen… I'm not sure Alice could handle the heartbreak.
How does a family cope with that kind of internal trauma?
I shook my head, anxiety slowly building inside my chest. I couldn't handle this. Not with college looming just ahead, and moving away for the first time since Jasper and I were adopted. No, I sighed. I need stability, not more to worry about. It was just too much pressure to handle, and it made me want to drink… and that was an incredibly stupid thing to do when you come from a long line of abusive alcoholics.
BPOV
My heart was pounding the entire time I tried on clothes. It made it impossible to pay attention to anything Rosalie and Alice said. All my thoughts seemed to take a direct U-turn back to the boy behind the magnificent piano; his intense green eyes, soft coppery hair, and striking features.
As I pretend to look through a rack of dresses I pictured Edward in as much detail as my muddled brain could muster. He had the most beautiful bone structure. I recalled the almond shape of his eyes and the way they squinted adorably when he smiled. My stomach flip flopped when I saw that his aqua-lined nose had a bump in the center of the bridge, like he had gotten into a fight and suffered a broken nose. The small imperfection made him that much more attractive. When he spoke to me, not only was the tone low and velvety, but his lips curved into a sexy crooked smile that did strange things to me. The boy dripped sex appeal… and for the first time in my life my girly bits were on high alert.
My breath hitched as the unfamiliar muscles deep inside my belly clenched and pulled. I tried to hide the flush creeping up my cheeks but Alice's eyes seemed to be trained on my face, deciphering every single emotion I showed. This time she caught my eye with a knowing grin.
Gah! Could a girl crush in peace, please? She snickered and turned back to the rack opposite me, searching for that perfect dress. Rosalie looked between us and rolled her blue eyes. I frowned. I'm sure they were getting a kick out of my confusion, but I wasn't used to my body warming to this sensual degree, so excuse me for feeling a little off kilter.
All I know is Edward is entirely distracting. My thoughts and feelings we're being twisted up into a Bella-pretzel. I'm not used to feeling this way about a boy. Dad urged me to wait until college to date and Jacob seemed to have a cow every time a guy showed the slightest bit of interest. Why I let them treat me this way was a mystery, but here, away from their influence I was able to navigate my sexuality and romantic notions in peace.
But now that I have freedom I don't know what to do with it.
I huffed, angry at my ignorance. I had to find out how Edward felt about me because there's no way in hell I'm staying over at his house for an entire week while feeling this strongly for him, and not have him return those feelings. Unrequited love was something I knew all too well, thanks to my many books. And I don't plan on being as pathetic as Jane Bennett or Elinor Dashwood, waiting around for their men to get their head out of there asses. I was a strong, independent woman, and… and… oh hell, who am I kidding? I was the epitome of pathetic, crushing on a guy I literally just met. And already he's all I can think about?
Yeah. Pathetic is my new middle name.
Through all of this inner turmoil I vaguely registered that Rosalie Hale was one of the most beautiful girls I had ever laid eyes on. She was tall and thin, had long blonde hair and dark blue eyes. She reminded me of the girls you'd see in the south; perfect tanned body, blonde, and sparkling white teeth. You know, Jessica Simpson.
Rosalie was saying something at me, but I was staring off into space, replaying my awkward conversation with Edward. God, he was beautiful.
"Bella, could you try to pay attention?" Rosalie snapped. I jumped and felt instantly guilty. The poor girl was a stranger and she was being so helpful.
"I'm sorry," I apologized. "I do appreciate what you're doing for me, Rosalie." She pursed her lips, eyeing me speculatively; to forgive Bella or not.
"Can she help it if our brother shot an arrow into her heart?" Alice teased while patting my bent head.
"Yeah right," Rosalie mumbled. "At least listen to what we're saying, okay?" I wanted to salute but thought better of it. Rose gave off the impression that she's the last girl you wanna pick on, so I nodded meekly.
"Oh, look at this one, Rose!" Alice held up a dress with an excited smile.
"Bingo!" Rosalie frog marched me to the dressing rooms shoving me through the pale grey curtain, and ordered my clothes off.
I pouted at my reflection in the full length mirror. I wanted to go home! Funny, I thought. I was so opposed to it being home this morning when Renee asked me to move in, and now...
Is it healthy for a guy to have that kind of influence over me? I rolled my eyes, exasperated, and stripped.
A spark of rebellion flared within me, my Quileute pack mentality kicking in. I had half a mind to walk around the store in my Fruit of the Looms, seeing I was out of my clothes 90% of the time. But I wasn't a Quileute or part of the pack. I was Bella, just Bella. So as usual I did what I was told to do, and tried on the umpteenth dress. Push over didn't even cover it.
The dress was a deep blue and looked lovely with my ivory complexion. Instead of washing me out the color worked for me, complimenting my rosy cheeks and amber eyes. It had a silky corset bodice that I struggled to zip up, and the full length skirt fell to my ankles in flowing chiffon. I blinked in surprise. Instead of looking like a girl playing dress up in her mom's clothes I looked like a sophisticated lady, like this dress was tailored for my bodies dimensions.
I stepped out of the dressing room and the girl's squealed with delight, bouncing with their arms around each other.
"I take it this was the clear winner?" I laughed.
They giggled breathlessly. "Oh, Bella," Alice said, bouncing over to take my hands. "You're going to knock Edward's socks off!" I smiled happily, though his socks aren't precisely what I'd like to knock off. Now his pants…
"There's only one problem," I said, halting them in their tracks.
Alice frowned. "What's that?"
"It's too expensive. I can't afford…" I picked up the tag under my arm and read,"…$199.99. Even if it is on sale it's too rich for my blood."
Rosalie waved off my concern with a quick pft. "Don't worry about it Bella. We'll get it on the card. Besides, it's the only dress in three stores that's worked with you. I don't think you have a choice."
"Rosalie, I can't just…"
"You can and you will." She nudged me back through the curtains before I could argue and said, "Now get dressed and we'll go look for shoes next." And while I was muttering darkly under my breath, she called, "And don't say I've never done anything for you." I sighed. Rosalie was so bossy.
Ten minutes later she and Alice swiped that credit card faster than I could say debt. And to my surprise, while I was in the dressing room, they too picked out dresses for the wedding. Alice bought a light grey cocktail dress and Rosalie a red, spaghetti strap, gown. The cost alone must have been astronomical.
"You're going to the wedding too?" I asked hopefully, suddenly afraid of being all alone with Renee's new family. Talk about being the black sheep.
"Dad and Mom are best friends with Phil and Renee. Why wouldn't we be invited?" Alice asked as we entered a swanky shoe store with name brand pumps. The bell dinged and we were immediately accosted by salesman.
"How come we've never met you before?" Rosalie asked while waiting for a platform sandal, size 7. "Renee's lived here for two years. I didn't even know she had a daughter."
I froze, all the air sucked from my lungs.
Her last words, I didn't even know she had a daughter, rang in my ears. Did Renee speak so little of me, or mention any cute anecdotes of when I was a baby? That's what other mothers did, right? I sighed. What did you expect Bella? The woman's always put herself before you, you know that. So get over it. You know how to deal with maternal rejection.
I swallowed the sickening feeling so I could ask, "Two years?" My voice had no volume. Rosalie and Alice looked at me strangely, nodding.
"Right," I mumbled to myself. "Two years, seven hundred and thirty days, twenty four months… that's plenty of time to call me and tell me where she is, right?"
"Bella?" Alice poked my shoulder. "Are you okay?"
Her pretty elfin face came into focus, and I realized I slipped into one of my mental ramblings with a shoe man at my feet. "Oh, sorry, um… my parents split when I was six years old, and Renee left me with Charlie; that's my father…" I scowled at the unwelcome onslaught of memories, trying to shove them back unsuccessfully; me, stirring a boiling pot of oatmeal at seven years old at getting burned, or doing the shopping with Jacob at twelve years old because dad wasn't around to do it. I was a hungry, lonely, little girl.
"She never came back for me," I said with a distant stare. "And I hardly ever heard from her, so when she called to tell me she was getting remarried I jumped at the chance to see her, hoping that maybe she'd say I'm sorry and explain why she doesn't want me."
Rosalie was staring at me with wide blue eyes. "Bella, that's so sad."
My answering smile as shaky. "Don't feel bad for me, Rose. If anything, I met you guys. And for that I'm grateful." Something in the way she looked at me changed; respect I think.
Alice's smile was pitying, but genuine. "I feel the same way, Bella."
"Actually... my mom sort of offered to let me finish my senior year here, and I might be thinking about it. It all depends on…" Edward, I didn't say aloud.
Alice's eyes bugged out of her head and she slapped my arm. "Shut-up!" I threw my head back and laughed, grateful for the change in subject.
"No, I'm not kidding. She asked me this morning." Alice grabbed my hands and jumped up and down. I uncharacteristically bounced with her, my silver strappy heeled feet slipping and sliding beneath me.
"Now you and Edward will have all year together before college!"
Rose cleared her throat and coolly flipped the page of a magazine. "Don't you think you're getting a little ahead of yourself?" She glanced at Alice with admonishing blue eyes. "You're not psychic, so don't go predicting anyone's future. It's giving false hope." I looked at Rosalie with a hurt expression. But she was right. Who can say that Edward feels the same way I do? He could have looked at me that way simply because he appreciated my semi-knowledge of classical music. I got the feeling he doesn't have many like-minded people around him.
Yes, I decided. Rose is right. Giving me false hope was a bad thing indeed.
"Rosalie Lillian Hale!" Alice hissed angrily.
"What?" she said innocently.
"No, she's right," I waved Alice down, plopping down in a swanky red leather chair behind me.
"No, she's not!" she shot her smug sister a look. "Rosalie wasn't there! I was! I saw how he looked at you, Bella, and I know that look; I see it every day on Jasper and Emmett's face." I frowned, not understanding what their brothers have to do with anything. "I know Edward as well as myself, so trust me, Bella. You're here for a reason." I stared into her wide, sincere eyes, and felt compelled to trust her. She asked me earlier to do just that, that it's what friends do.
"Okay," I nodded. "I'll trust you, Alice." She sighed with relief, ignoring the disapproving shake of Roses head.
I'm not sure why Alice felt so strongly about Edward's feelings for me, whatever they are, but if she told me not to give up, than I wouldn't give up… even if Rose's warning unnerved me.
The ride home took less time than I thought, and with every passing mile my breathing turned into hyperventilation. I was strung tighter than Edward's piano by the time we passed Renee's brick house, and through the disorientation I noticed my mother wasn't home. If everything went as I hoped with Edward, then I need to sit down with her and discuss my moving in.
I sincerely hope he's worth the upheaval in my life.
I dropped my head in my hands and closed my eyes. Everything that was once solid fact in my life had flipped on its ear. For instance, Jacob Black would always be my only friend, Charlie would always be my only parent, and cold, wet, Forks is where I'd settle down, get married, and have pretty babies. But instead I'm cruising in a sleek red convertible on a hot, sunny, day in Lake Pleasant Arizona, buried under bags of beautiful, expensive items, and being driven to the man of my dreams by two girl-friends. I giggled, delirious with happiness. I have to be having an out-of-body-experience. This reality can't be real. Edward was too beautiful to exist outside of a girl's dirty dreams.
I gritted my teeth and forced myself not to fling my body from the car as we parked in the drive. I clamped my fingers around the edge of the leather seat and bounced in place. But when I was finally released I paced myself with Rosalie's long-legged stride, and Alice trotted behind us, arms weighed down with bags bigger than her, talking a mile a minute.
This was it, here we go, I psyched myself up. Edward's in there and I'm out here, just two more steps, Bella! Remember, calm, cool, and collected…
Oh, who am I kidding?
Pretending to be a humble guest at this point would be insulting everyone's intelligence, so I rudely pushed past Rose and scanned the wide open house in breathless anticipation. I spied Emmett on the couch watching a movie, and a blonde guy I didn't recognize in the kitchen rummaging through a stainless steel fridge. To my disappointment there was a notable lack of piano playing; it was shocking how empty the house felt without it. For some stupid reason I imagined he would still be in that dimly lit room waiting for me and playing his stirring rendition of Clair De Lune. I instantly recognized this for the silly, romantic, notions of a girl who reads way too many romance novels. This is the twenty first century, Bella, not seventeenth century London. Boys don't write heart felt confessions of undying love to the awkward neighbor girl with silly crushes!
Angry with myself for being so incredibly stupid, I drifted across the living room and peeked inside his music room just to confirm what I already knew. My heart dropped into my stomach. He wasn't here. The lights were turned off and his sheet music was neatly piled on top of the glossy piano. All I could think was: Sorry Alice, I guess Rosalie was right. Never try to predict someone's intensions no matter how sure you are.
I slunk back to Alice's side near the door, licking my wounded pride.
She reached out to touch my arm when someone called, "There you are!" Our attention snapped to the really cute blonde guy in kitchen, and Alice beamed. Her face completely lit up. He chuckled and tipped a carton of milk to his mouth, taking a swig.
What the hell, I thought peevishly. Is this house full of freaking models or what? I was half expecting Tyra Banks to come out with her camera crew and tell us our next challenge!
"Jasper," Alice chastised affectionately. "If Esme saw you with that milk she'd flay you alive."
He smirked, eyeing her in a way I would not think proper for a brother. "So, what are you gonna do about it, squirt?"
She sauntered up to him and brought her hand to his cheek, lowering his face to hers. "Kiss the evidence away, that's what." And she did! She planted a wet one right on his mouth! And Jasper didn't pull away!
Holy crap!
I turned to see if Rose and Emmett saw this, but they were too busy frenching on the couch, pawing at one another's bodies! My eyes were literally in danger of falling out of my skull. What the hell was going on?
This was all too much to handle. First Edward and now this? I didn't know if I were still asleep or walked into the Twilight Zone!
And that's when I saw a small photograph on the wall; the family at a water park, smiling and waving for the camera. Edward was in the back, grinning madly with a pair of goggles on his face. Than a horrific idea popped to life like a light bulb over my head; is he involved in this, this… incest? Unwanted visions of Edward having his dirty way with Alice flashed through my mind. Then again maybe he prefers both girls at the same time; what did I know about incest?
God, it gives family fun night a whole new meaning!
Yes, I should run! That's the best thing for now. At least until I sort out my head.
Alice was watching me back away from them like a frightened mouse caught in the gaze of a hungry snake. I always had terrible reactions, open and obvious.
"I know this must seem strange, Bella…"
"Oh, gee, you think?" I spat, eyeing them all like they were crazy. Rose and Emmett watched me from the couch wearing matching frowns, and Jasper shuffled his feet uncomfortably, unable to look me in the eye.
"… but the first thing you have to remember is that we're not blood relations. Only Rose and Jazz share DNA."
"But… but you're brother and sister," I stammered with revulsion.
Alice shook her head. "We're adopted into the same family, Bella. We came from different parts of the country, born to different parents."
"Right," I replied unconvinced. Adopted or not they were siblings! Ew, just, ew!
She took a weary breath. "We can't help it if fate brought us together this way. You see, Jasper is my soul mate, and I love him. It seemed cruel at first to feel this way for your adopted sibling, because the last thing we wanted was to disappoint Esme and Carlisle. I mean, they gave us a safe home full of love and stability. But when you get down to it, you realize that a legal document matters very little when you're face to face with the person you're supposed to spend the rest of your life with. And they understood that and respected it. If they didn't…" she shook her head grimly. "… I'm not sure what would have happened to our family."
Jasper strolled over and put his arms around her. She fit in his arms perfectly, pressing her face into his chest and cooing gently into her ear. If I didn't know they were brother and sister before this would I have judged them so harshly?
"Please don't run Bella," she whispered, looking at me with teary eyes. "I like you, and it's hard to find people who don't judge us. Please don't run away." Wow, Alice looked desperate.
I suppose what she said makes sense? They couldn't help who they fell in love with and it certainly wasn't their fault for being adopted into the same family. If it was fate, as Alice believed, then it all boiled down to the same thing… you don't turn away love when it comes your way. Apparently their mom and dad understood that, unlike me who instantly turned their relationship into a devious, sexual, orgy. And in that I had my answer; I'm the pervert, not them.
"I won't run, Alice. I promise." Her breath caught and she jumped at me. I hugged her tightly, snickering. When she let me go I said, "And I'm sorry for reacting the way I did. It was just such a shock to the system." Jasper snorted, and muttered, I bet it was.
And even though all of this was beginning to settle in my mind, I still had to ask, "Is Edward…" I didn't know how to say this tactfully. "…involved with one of you?"
Rose made a loud gagging noise while Alice threw her head back and laughed. "God no!" They chimed together.
"We're not a fucking harem, Bella!" Rosalie snapped. I flushed, feeling ridiculous.
"Well, I don't know about you," Emmett said in a gay affect. "But I find Edward incredibly irresistible." Jasper bent forward and guffawed, his honey blonde hair falling into his gray eyes.
"I knew it," Rosalie teased, pushing her boyfriend playfully away. "You're really batting for the other team, aren't you?"
Emmett shrugged. "I might even let you borrow my I heart Taylor Lautner t-shirt for being a good sport about it, babe."
Alice smiled and kissed my cheek as her rowdy siblings teased good-natured Emmett. He took it in stride, loving the attention.
It must be hard, I thought while watching them, making friends when everyone's constantly scrutinizing your unconventional love life. And Edward, how does he handle being around this every day? This was of no fault of his, but I bet it affects him. Especially being the odd man out.
And with that thought I redoubled my efforts to find him. I looked throughout the first floor, his empty music room, then out the massive window-wall toward the beach. He was nowhere to be found.
Just as anxiety set in I heard movement on the staircase behind me...
"Hey, have you two ass bags seen my sunblock?" I gasped and spun around.
"Now, Edward," said Jasper in a teasing tone. "Why would you talk like that in the presence of ladies?" He dropped to the lithely to the floor and skidded in his black Adidas flip flops… then our eyes met.
"Edward," I breathed with relief, all my fears expelled in that one word.
"Bella," he smiled that panty melting half smirk of his, and a look came over her face like we've had sex already and it was really good.
Oh my! I guess I don't have to worry about him liking me…
It was like the first time we saw each other. That instantaneous spark traveled through my body like vines taking root in the ground, tying me to him and him to me. His green eyes flashed to the lip trapped between my teeth, and I swear to God he growled.
What was going on here?
There was nothing light and fluffy about this encounter. It reminded me of the movies we watched back in science class about animal behavior; Edward was the mountain lion, sniffing me out as potential mate, and I think I inexplicably measured up. His beautifully carved face was focused and heated, his nostrils even flared like he could smell my pheromones from across the room.
I realized something important as I was shivering under his gaze. Edward was an intense person. When he feels something it overwhelms him, and he needs an outlet… maybe I'm that outlet? God, I hoped so!
He moved toward me revealing just how tall he was; about 6' 2'. He towered over my 5'8 stature. As he stepped into my physical space I could hardly stand it. He smelled like clean body wash and something distinctly male. My hormones went into overdrive as it filled my nose, settling on my tongue. Can I lick you?
"Hi," he said in that in that low musical voice.
"Hello Edward," I smiled. When I spoke his green eyes softened, then lingered on my lips. Does he want to kiss me?
"Holy shit, Al," Rosalie whispered. "I take it all back. You are psychic."
She giggled. "No, not psychic. Just observant."
"Well, you better get her upstairs before he has an accident," Jasper keenly observed. Emmett was hanging over the back of the couch, outright laughing at us.
I didn't hear any of it because Edward's body heat was reaching out and running its feathery fingers over my bare skin, then the next thing I now I'm being dragged upstairs by Rosalie, barking out orders for us to snap out of it.
"No," I protested, craning my neck to see Edward watching me ascend the stair case. I've been dragged away from him twice now! He smiled that same I-know-something-you-don't-know smile… and my panties spontaneously combusted.
Once locked inside Alice's bathroom she handed me the brand new, hot pink bikini, they bought me and ordered me to change. Grumbling, I did as I was told.
"That needs to be adjusted Bella, come here."
"It's hard to reach, that's all."
Rosalie stood behind me in the full length mirror wearing a red bikini and a white hip wrap. She had a fantastic body. But I didn't mind being around that degree of perfection because my body wasn't so bad itself. My muscles were strong and conditioned from balancing on tip toes for fourteen years. Madam Jane would kick my ass if I didn't continue training while I was on vacation, so I had to remind myself that amidst the fun I was currently having, I needed to stay focused and dance every other day, or I'd get soft.
Rose adjusted the ties at my hips and nodded when she was done. Alice flounced in, wearing a black one-piece bathing suit and a silver hip wrap. She slid on funky sunglasses, and I was struck with how much she reminded me of Audrey Hepburn. I told her so, which earned me a huge smile. Come to find out, that was Al's idol.
I slipped on a pair of Roses black boy shorts, since I wasn't entirely comfortable wearing next to nothing in front of Edward, than I let my hair down from its ponytail. It fell down my back in long, curly, waves, tickling the skin of my back and shoulders.
With anAlice-approved nod, we walked outside into the afternoon sun and trotted down the foot path toward the lake, where the boys waited for us in the bobbing boat.
EPOV
I was still staring at the staircase where I had last seen Bella when Jasper spoke.
"Wow!" he said impressed. "What was that, Edward?"
"I want her!" I breathed with a deep determination, my husky voice unrecognizable to my own ears.
"We can see that," Emmett snorted. I panicked and looked down at my docile junk.
"Jesus Christ, Emmett," I snapped, slamming out the screen door. "Make me think I perved out on her!" They roared with laughter.
The two chuckle heads followed me down the path toward the dock with towels draped over our shoulders. I could hear them murmuring close behind. Whatever, I sighed, bracing myself for the immature comments.
I grabbed the keys from Jasper and hopped lightly over the side of the boat and first checked the gas then retied the jet-skis to the dock.
"Edward has a girlfriend," Jasper said conversationally to Emmett. I rolled my eyes skyward. Oh, brother, here we go.
"She's not my girlfriend, guys. I just met her five hours ago."
"It didn't look that way to me, did it to you Jazz?" Emmett ignored me as I turned on the boats engine, warming it up.
"The way she looked at Edward was extremely hot, don't you think?" Jazz replied.
"She is hot," Emmett agreed. "Did you see that tight body? Oh, and those long-ass legs? Mmm-mm. Imagine those babies wrapped around your waist."
That did it! A voice deep in the back of my brain shouted, 'You have no right to be ogling Bella's legs!'...so I took a deep breath and turned on my brothers, not angrily, but pleadingly.
"Look guys, I never ever ask anything of you, but this time I'm begging you to leave her alone. Please, don't embarrass her."
"Oh, I wasn't going to embarrass her." An evil grin spread over Emmett's face.
I nodded, expecting this. "As long as you leave her alone, that's all that matters. Remember, to her were still strangers."
"So protective Edward," Jasper grinned knowingly. "Is it that your male hormones have finally kicked in after seventeen years?" My grateful smile dropped, and I retreated into that protective part of myself, the part where I've hidden for eleven years from these assholes. They always do this to me. I get that I'm their little brother but they must know that I want what they have; happiness, acceptance, love…
"Yes Jasper, that's it," I said flatly. "I'm a pathetic loser with a fucked up immune system who can barely function without getting sick. I'm a freak show, not normal, never was, never will be. Believe me, I get it." Their teasing manner quickly dissipated.
"Hey," Emmett backpedaled. "Don't sweat it bro, we got your back."
Jasper eyed me intently while I fiddled sullenly with the radio. "Edward, we were only kidding around. It's been so long since you talked to us that, well, I guess we over compensated."
"I know," I shot him a smirk. "It's just that I really like her and I'm afraid you're going to chase her away."
"That won't happen, believe me," he said. "Not after what she saw earlier." He and Emmett chuckled. I frowned not knowing what they meant.
"Yeah," Emmett agreed. "She's tougher than she looks." Oh God, what did they do?
I hated being a baby, but sometimes the fact that my brothers think themselves superior, bugged the shit out of me. If they we're honest with themselves they'd have to admit they we're lucky as shit they found the girls at all! So who the hell where they to tease me for not having that luxury; a sibling on a silver platter?
"We come baring food," Rosalie called from the wobbly dock. I stood up in relief and helped her climb into the boat. Emmett whistled and slapped her ass with a loud smack. She screeched and hit him back.
"Here's the cooler," Alice chirped. "Careful it's heavy. Mom really went crazy making sandwiches." She struggled to lift it, but I got it.
As she was climbing over the side she said, "Speaking of mom, she said in a note that you're the only one licensed to drive the boat, so if she finds out anyone else did you'll be in deep crap." She slid those god awful sunglasses down her nose and winked. I couldn't help it… I missed her goofiness, so I laughed. She smirked and pushed past me.
"Can you help me, Edward? I'm not sure how to do it without killing myself." Bella was looking nervously at the high walls of the boat and the distance from the dock. I watched her bite her soft lower lip… and regretted it. My dick stiffened and pointed straight at her as if it were saying, grab hold of me and I'll pull you up...
She looked up when I didn't answer. A slow smile spread across her face when she found me staring at her like some fool who was hit in the face by a basketball. She was already so beautiful clothed, that to see her in just a bikini and boy shorts was going to take some major control on my part not to ogle her body like some sick pervert. But, God, did I want to…
"Edward." She said slowly, letting my name roll of her tongue. I blinked stupidly.
"Oh, I'm sorry." I shook my head to clear it of its foggy lust. "Here, let me help you with that."
I took the basket from her, handed it to Emmett behind me, and reached out for her hand. She slid her long thin fingers into my palm, gripped my forearm with her other hand and slid her long, glossy, leg up over the side of the boat. I pulled her up but she stumbled into me, clutching my waist for support with a cry of panic.
Everyone looked up and grinned at our happy predicament.
I hugged her to me when the boat lurched sideways, supporting us against the windshield. She looked up at me with wide amber eyes… and I melted. Please, like me Bella, my eyes begged. I can't be around you and not feel lost. Her eyes softened, as if understanding my silent request. My shaking fingers found purchase in her silky brown hair, admiring the way it flowed down around her back in waist length waves and curls.
Stay in my arms, Bella, please.
"Come on, man," Emmett muttered quietly. "It's hot as Hades out here. Let's get this boat moving." I sighed and reluctantly let her go. She walked unsteadily past me to sit in the back with Alice. My palms still tingled from touching her...amongst other things.
She chatted with Alice, her eyes flicking to me every few seconds while I checked the boats gauges. I was hyper aware of her no matter where I was or what I was doing, like a spot light was trained on her at all times. That was when I realized I had a problem; Esme said I was the designated driver, and Bella sat in the very back with Alice, so I wouldn't be able to talk to her. I frowned, frustrated by the circumstances.
"Are you used to boats, Bella?" I blurted out from the Captain's chair, swiveling around toward her. She blinked, confused I think.
"Not speed boats. Why?"
"Because once we hit fifty miles an hour the back of the boat where you're sitting sinks a bit, and the front rise's." This was totally true of course. "Where would you be more comfortable?" I smiled when she apologized to Alice, crawling over Jaspers lap and scurrying to the front. Alice followed obediently, kicking Emmett and Rosalie in the back.
"I didn't know that," she said anxiously. "Thank you."
"Anytime," I grinned.
I put the boat in reverse and called over my shoulder, "Is everyone ready?"
"Wooh!" crowed Emmett. "Let's roll little brother!"
"For Christ sake, Em, calm down," Rose sighed.
"Yeah," giggled Alice. "Remember what happened last time?"
"What happened?" Bella asked curiously, looking between them with a grin.
"Don't you dare," Emmett warned.
"Oh, like we won't now," Jasper laughed. "Emmett mooned another boat and lost his balance, falling in. I got pictures on my phone, wanna see?" Bella nodded excitedly, reaching for the Blackberry, but Emmett clocked Jasper before the exchange was made.
"Ow, you bastard!" he yelped, rubbing his shoulder. Bella looked adorably shocked.
I chuckled and pushed the lever forward, speeding off to the center of the lake. The wind drowned out any conversation, but it didn't matter, because every now and then I'd feel her eyes on me, giving me a reason to look at her in return. So much was being passed between those quick glances; do you like me? I like you. Can we talk? I'd like to get to know you better.
I couldn't ignore that something was changing inside me, and it coincided with Bella showing up in my piano room this morning. I woke up in a wash of sweat, gasping in panic from my mother's nightly visit… and then there was Bella, beautiful and unassuming, erasing all my anger and grief with a simple sunny smile and a soft spoken hello.
She gave me hope.
BPOV
I have to admit, I'm a habitual hair twirler. When I feel anxious I find that perfect strand and twist it around my finger until I'm calm. And right now I was twirling a curl at high speed.
Edward was testing the boats limits, crashing through the waves like a speed demon. There was a manic gleam in his gorgeous green eyes when the boats nose bounced and slammed us back down with a jolt. My nails bit into the white leather seat. Did he have to drive so fast?
The almost nonexistent waves on shore were huge out here! I remembered what Edward said about the boat sinking in the back, and turned curiously around to see Emmett and Rosalie practically immersed in the lake, laughing their asses off.
It's silly to be nervous, I know. But it was new to me. I was used to hand carved canoes gliding across calm misty lakes and scummy green ponds. The biggest disturbance they experienced back home was torrential rain, not speed-thirsty teenage boys!
I noticed Edward watching my thin fingers manipulate a strand and raised my dark eyebrow in a questioning manner. He shrugged and smiled that breath taking crooked smile. It was kind of fun not having any communication besides facial expressions and subtle body movements; it gave us a reason to stare at one another for longer than necessary. But I think he picked up on my anxiety, because a moment later we mercifully slowed down somewhere near the middle of the lake where the water was clear, cool, and aquamarine.
I took a deep breath and looked out at the scenery. It was breathtaking. We had to be miles from the closest beach; the trees looked miniature and houses were nothing but dots of color. The sky above was an expansive bright blue, the sun, luxurious and warm. I tilted my face up to it and smiled. My skinned tingled pleasantly as the unblocked sun beat down on my face and shoulders, warming me to the very tips of my fingers and toes.
Suddenly I was afraid to go back home. I couldn't survive in sleepy little Forks anymore, with its tall imposing pine trees and stretches of sunless months. No, I was afraid to go back to the rain and cold damp earth. I was a human being, not an amphibian!
I have a big decision to make, a difficult one with major consequences. I would break Charlie's heart by leaving him alone in that house full of memories of a broken family, or hurt myself for going back, just to make him happy.
Either way, someone was going to get hurt.
The question I should be posing is whether Edward was worth it? Truth is I didn't know him from Adam, but something about the boy sitting next to me with beautiful profile and coppery colored hair made me feel more alive than my old life ever did, and that was worth exploring.
A few minutes later we floated to a standstill, bobbing over the swells like a toy boat. Edward reached up and shut the boat off, grinning over at me when he heard me sigh in relief. I smirked back; amused that he had picked up on my anxiety.
To my tremendous shock the boat lurched.
"CANNON BAAAALL," bellowed Emmett. He slammed into the water with a huge sploosh, sending a wall of water into the boat.
"Emmett McCarty Cullen!" Rosalie screeched.
Alice bared her teeth and growled, "If you value your life you'll never do that again!" Jazz handed her a towel sniggering.
Edward watched me like a hawk to see if I was upset. "it's okay," I smiled. "The water feels nice and warm."
"Warm?" Alice's teeth chattered as Emmett crawled back in that boat. "It's f f freezing."
"Well its warm compared to where I'm from."
"Where are you from?" Edward asked, leaning unconsciously toward me.
"Forks, Washington," I flushed. His brows pulled together at my tone.
"You say that like it's a bad thing. I heard Washington is a beautiful state."
"It is, if you're passing through on vacation. Forks has an average of three hundred and twenty one days of rain, and it snows in May if it's cold enough. Did you know that?"
"No," he breathed. They all looked shocked.
"Well it does," I said grimly. "And being here, well, let's just say my cold body has gone into shock. The lake feels like bath water to me."
"What do you do for fun, then?" Jasper asked.
"Oh, well there's a Native American Reservation where the Quileute tribe live, and I grew up there. There are beautiful beaches along their coast, but the ocean is 30 degrees on a good day, so..." Alice shivered into her towel. "And sometimes I cliff dive with my friends when the sun comes out, but what I spend most of my time doing is tooling around the rez on my motorcycle." I frowned, realizing I missed it. It sure was fun.
"Motorcycle?" Edward asked, raising one of his dark alabaster eyebrows.
I grinned. "Yep, a 74' Harley. A classic."
"Holy shit," Edward whispered, wearing an impish grin.
Rosalie looked at me like I were insane. "Cliff diving into the Pacific Ocean?"
"Native Americans?" Jasper tilted his head thoughtfully. I guessed he was trying to extract them from our history books and put them in today's context, like removing Crazy Horse out of South Dakota's Sioux nation and dropping him in the middle of a Mall in Idaho. The image didn't add up.
I laughed. "I know. I feel so alien here. Though I'm really glad I came. I haven't seen my Mom in years and now I might be here longer than the summer."
"What, you were going back?" Edward leaned in closer, about three feet from me. His scent got caught in the breeze and I couldn't help but breathed him in. It was the same as before, body wash and something distinctly male; leather, musk, aftershave?
"Um, yeah," I nodded, trying to clear my lust addled brain. "Mom offered to let me stay and enroll in high school around here."
Edward sat up straighter and beamed at the thought. "Are you going to do it?" He asked suddenly serious.
I looked pointedly at Edward, letting him know he was the deciding factor here. "I'm thinking about it." He looked immensely pleased with himself and smiled over at Alice. She chuckled, shaking her head.
"You said you're a dancer, right?" he asked, taking a water from the cooler and handing it to me. "You look flushed," he explained.
"Thanks," I said gratefully. "I am hot."
He smiled his sexy, secret, smile again. "Yeah, you are." My eyes widened at his blatant flirtation.
He thinks I'm hot? Oh, honey, have you looked in a mirror lately? You set the standard for hot!
"Um, yeah," I nodded like a wide eyed bobble-head doll. "Ballet is what I think I want to pursue for a career. Well, either that or study classic literature, maybe teach." Edward listened intently, his pretty sparkly eyes never leaving my face for a second. I was a flustered mess at this point.
"Hey, Bella," Emmett called, breaking our connection. "Do you wear those frilly pink tutus when you dance?" Edward face palmed himself.
"Yes, when I was ten." I laughed.
"So, you can do that tippy-toe thing?" Alice asked.
"Yes. And it's called arabesque; the first position."
Emmett snorted into his root beer. "That's not what I call the first position." Rose smacked his bare chest with a thwack.
"Show us," Jasper said keenly. Alice nodded excitedly.
"Alice, Rose," warned Edward. "Don't make her…"
"No, I'll do it," I said, stopping him. "It's what I do. Why be embarrassed about it?"
I stood up gingerly, touching Edwards shoulders for support, which I noted were hard as a rock. Surprised, I looked down at his body instead of his face and realized for the first time that he was as solidly built as Jasper or Emmett. Holy hell… How had I missed that?
He held my elbows whileI climbed carefully over the cooler. I stood myself in the middle of the boat, somewhere between Jasper and Emmett, and kicked off my sandals. I crossed my ankles tightly into the fourth position, found my center... which was difficult because of the rolling waves beneath us... balanced all my weight on the balls of my feet, stretched my arms above my head delicately, and soon enough my feet followed; perfect adagio.
I stood on tip toes and looked down at Alice who was cheering with the others. I plunked down and rubbed out the strain on my ankles and calves. Edward was staring at me open mouthed, eyes glazed with some emotion.
"Teach me!" Alice demanded as I slid in the seat beside her.
"Alice, it took me ten years to learn how to do that without my pointe shoes." She pouted, disappointed. "Besides, you really shouldn't do that or you can damage your toes permanently."
"Then why do it yourself?" she asked.
I smirked, quirking a brow. "Because I can." She chuckled, nudging me.
Emmett handed out lunch soon after that; chicken salad wraps and chips. Alice mentioned that Edward was eating again, which was strange. I glanced at him concerned. Was he sick? Edward frowned at his sister and took a huge bite so he didn't have to answer.
Hmm…
"So, tell me," I said over the radio. "Why were you so frustrated this morning?"
Edward frowned. "You noticed that did you?"
"The whole house noticed," Emmett growled, grabbing Rosalie's hand.
"Uh, yeah." He scratched his head. "Sorry about that. Um, sometimes I get stuck in my head, and I can't make what I feel go from here," he touched his temple. "… To the piano. Do you understand?" Everyone shook their head, looking at him like he was insane. He rolled his eyes and sighed.
I looked around at them all, wondering how they could not see that their callous reaction to his frustrations bothered him. I mean, it wasn't their fault they don't understand the pressure we put on ourselves to create perfection, but it was their fault for not being more understanding and supportive. Maybe if they were Edward wouldn't have mini-outbursts, like this morning.
"I understand completely," I reassured him, reaching out to touch his thigh. He looked at me with desperation. "When I have to choreograph something for class, it can literally drive me insane until I find a way to display what I'm seeing in my head. It can be the most frustrating, horrible, feeling, to know that you're good enough to create something amazing, yet you have to compete with distractions and constant outside interruptions." I sighed deeply, feeling the residual frustration from my last competition; it wasn't pretty. "I suppose it could be the same for a musician. We artists are too sensitive."
He was staring at me with wonder. "You really do understand."
I smirked. "I wouldn't say I did if I didn't." He smiled back wryly.
"Hey, do you want to know what I do when I get stuck like that?"
He shook his head, "What?"
"I let it go, then come back to it later with a fresh perspective."
He grimaced, looking confused. "How can you do that?"
"Because I have to, or I'm forcing a piece of material rather than letting the audience experience it for themselves. You want someone to say, 'I know exactly what they were feeling when they created this piece'...at least that's what I aim for."
Edward squirmed in his seat, seeming to mull over my words. He glanced up shyly, twirling the white ties on his red board shorts and said, "I'm not sure I could just let it drop like that. I kinda have an obsessive personality."
I chuckled, already well aware of that. "Well then, your compositions will never live up to their full potential, Edward. I heard you even before I got through the door this morning, and you're a brilliant pianist; such a God given gift."
His frown softened and a look of tenderness replaced it. "Thank you, Bella. That means a lot coming from you."
I shrugged happily. "Honestly I'm little jealous."
"Of me?" he sounded incredulous. I nodded. "Why?"
"I've always wanted to play the piano but we couldn't afford lessons."
His entire demeanor brightened. "I'll teach you." Oh crap! Why did I have to go and admit that to him? The very thought of being alone with him in that music room sent my barely contained hormones into a frenzy.
I picked a strand of hair and wound it furiously around my finger. "N no," I stammered, embarrassed. "You have more important things to do with your time than teach me." Please, Edward, no. I'll more than likely embarrass myself in front of a genius like you.
"Bella…" My name rolled of his tongue in the most sensual way. Was it crazy that his voice was already so engrained in my mind? He leaned over and touched my knee, caressing the soft skin in tiny circles; I gasped, panting wantonly. "Please, let me teach you." In my head he said, please, let me touch you.
I stared at him with unconcealed want… and nodded.
Holy Crow! How did he do that?
EPOV
I was certain our insane chemistry had just quadrupled.
It seems we have a lot in common and for whatever reason that fanned the flames between us. And like a thirsty man, parched from going too long without drink, I needed to know more about her.
"What kind of literature do you like to read?" I asked eagerly. I was hungry for intelligent conversation, you know, ones that don't involve Gameboys and Prada bags.
"Oh, like I said, mostly classics." She touched her red bottom lip in thought. "I brought with me my collection of Jane Austen; I know, I'm a girl, don't laugh." I smiled. "I brought Wuthering Heights, Dickens, Browning and some Frost."
"Elizabeth Barrett Browning and Robert Frost!" I exclaimed, gaining everyone's attention. "You like poetry, too?" Emmett rolled his eyes and went back to arguing with Rose, which was their version of foreplay.
"Very much," Bella nodded happily. "I used to write but I got tied down with dance class and school." She sighed, absentmindedly twirling her hair. It made me want to touch it for myself.
"Frost is one of my favorites," I said conversationally. "I wrote my term paper on his works."
"I wrote my English-Lit paper on Shakespeare's tendencies to be misagonystic toward women. Got an A, too," she announced proudly.
"Congratulations." I chuckled.
There was something I needed to ask, and it was needling me now that I was enjoying brain coitus with Bella; consensual stimulation.
"Why do you like Wuthering Heights?"
One of her dark brows lifted questioningly. "Well, have you ever read it?"
I nodded. "Of course, but I always felt there wasn't one redeeming quality about Heathcliff or Cathy. They're a poisonous couple. Why they made the top ten literature couples of all time, I'll never know."
She smiled bemusedly at me, as if seeing me in an all new light. "I think that is their one redeeming quality, Edward. They love each other whether we agree with it or not. Sure, their evil to the core, but the sacrifices they make, well... even death couldn't keep them apart." I thought about her words for a moment, feeling my frontal lobe fire off synapsis from under use, and had to agree with her assessment.
"Okay, I see what you're saying. But what kind of love is that, to hunt down the person you've dedicated your existence to and destroy everything that they love? It just isn't normal."
"Well of course it's not normal. Giving someone a dead bird as a declaration of love is downright disturbing, but in a weird way… I find the story oddly refreshing."
"You lost me," I said.
"The plot isn't flowery or over-romanticized. Charlotte Bronte wrote a dark, twisted, story about flawed people who fall in love in a less than perfect time in history. The whole things messy, just like the real thing."
"Yeah, but…"
"If there were such a thing as perfect love, with perfect people, in a perfect situation, then we would live in a very boring world, don't you think?" I thought about it… and she was absolutely right. Not that I know anything about love, but the people sitting in the boat with me would agree with Bella. They had to fight to be together. Hell, they still do. But that's what makes it that much sweeter.
"Wow, you'd make an excellent teacher. You're incredibly insightful."
She beamed. "Thanks!"
"Do you know what feels really nice to me, Bella?"
"Nope, what," she smirked.
"That I can say the name Heathcliff and not have to explain that I'm not referring to the cartoon cat." I laughed. Bella burst into giggles, nodding in agreement.
Yep, two things I knew for sure; one: I was incredibly attracted to her. And two: She was intelligent, and we were definitely compatible. I'm not a prude, I appreciate normalcy, but Bella brought with her an air of sophistication and beauty that just isn't the norm.
She was perfect for me, and I knew it instinctively. Did she though?
JPOV
"Emmett, you're such an ass!" Rosalie chided. "What the hell do you know about aerodynamics let alone the German engine?"
His muscled chest rippled with indignation. "More than you think!"
"Prove it then." She started throwing scenario's at him for her next design, a German sports car.
Rose was going to attend Miami University along with Emmett this fall, except she enrolled in the engineering courses whereas Em got a football scholarship. Rosalie may be a diva, but get her in the garage and she could strip a shit-box and create something amazing in under two days; smart girl in expensive shoes.
I was starting medical school this fall at the U of A. As a kid Carlisle was amazed at how in tune I was with people. They talked to me, felt comforted by my words, though I was young and fresh from a broken home. Dad called it charisma, but I wasn't so sure. I think it was from my own experiences in Texas that made me sensitive to others sufferings; Rose and I came from a house full of angry drunks and it taught me to observe others and their behavior out of self-preservation. But what I most wanted with this understanding of human behavior was to train as a Psychiatrist, help fix what was mentally broken or bruised.
I've been secretly watching Edward and observing him for years. He worried more than any of my siblings. Rose's fear of change I understood. Alice's unhealthy desire to ignore anything from her past I respected. Emmett seemed impervious to pain, thus his need to prove his dominance. But Edward I've never been able to understand. I could feel his depression roll off of him, and frankly it scares me to death. I don't know how many times in the last month Esme has begged Carlisle to prescribe him medicine, and I tried to help, but dad insisted I leave Edward alone until they felt it was time to intervene. But when I came home from work this morning the atmosphere was different, lighter. It took me a few minutes to realize Edward wasn't banging at his piano like it insulted him. No, he played with the finesse of a man at peace with himself, and I was confused by it, worried even…until now.
I looked over at them in the front of the boat, happily chatting. What I witnessed was the typical human interaction interlaced with the chemical reaction to the opposite sex. They both reacted strongly to whatever scent and physical attributes the other possessed. Edward glances at her legs from time to time, her lips, her hair, her chest, but mainly searched her eyes for whatever it is he's looking for. He seemed completely engrossed by what she had to say. It sounded like advice on his inner turmoil as a frustrated artist. She was a dancer, an extension to his craft. From the look on Edwards face he was hungry to learn as much from her as possible. That made me wonder, was he lonely for that level of companionship? I can't imagine it has been easy to be alone in a house full of perfectly matched lovers.
So I shifted my attention to Bella.
Once in a while, when he was talking and laughing, she would extend her hand closer to his physical space, and I could feel her intense need to touch him, then she would hold herself with her arms. She was wishing he would hold her. I smiled for my brother. I liked Bella already, not only for Edward but because she made my Alice happy.
I hope she stays, Edward deserved her. She was his equal and I knew she would give herself willingly to him. It was just a matter of when.
Like I said, people fascinate me!
Review please, please, pretty puh-lease...