Good marks, bad marks

by Twisty Emerald

A sequel to "Temee! You can blame math, but you can't calculate your life!" in which Kagura is trying to improve her grades. Mostly about normal - Gintama normal - school life. Okikagu fluff. Contains: fluff, Gintama humor, some swearing and it may get some sexual references (mostly talking) or censoured words.

4. Admit it! People would do anything to ge

Hey there guys, long time no see! (I wonder why…)

This time I'm not gonna blabber nonsense in author-notes because I don't know about what to. All I'm gonna say is the ordinary excuses for being late, let's start!

So, why did this chapter took so long?

Because... Reason! You know the ending song of xxxHolic? Yeah, those reason(s).

Actually because it took me a lot to write it. Because it's f*cking long! It's a double-chapter! Why? Because I was getting out of topic... and don't ask me how I was getting out of the topic of my own story!

Because-mania! Let's because!

(But first disclaimer)

Disclaimer: I shall say it again: I don't own Gintama and I never will; it's Sorachi-sensei's and Sorachi-sensei's only!

---

By the way, happy birthday, Sougo!

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Chapter IV: Admit it! People would do anything to get what they want!

"...C... ina... d..."

Mostly that's all Kagura heard as she felt her head getting heavier and heavier. It started to balance back and forth, back and forth...

Alright, maybe that wasn't what she heard. Here's what she heard:

"Blah, blah, China... blablablablah lesson... blablablah bed.. blablah... blablablah sleep... blablabla... mo... China monster... blablabla-"

She suddenly felt two cold fingers poking her forehead and rising her head up in process.

She opened her eyes and saw a pretty much pissed off Sadist who was keeping her head up. Then he retracted his fingers and her head went down again.

He poked her forehead again. Her head went back. He took away his fingers. Her head went forward. He pushed her head and it went back again. He withdrew his fingers, her head went forward. Back and forth, back and forth, back and forth...

"Stop it, idiot!" she shouted irritated and caught his fingers in her strong grip. And she wasn't going to let go of them. But not in the cheesy way.

"It's not my fault you are so stupid to fall asleep while I talk to you." he dead-panned, not even impressed by her actions. Maybe only by the fact she actually woke up. "I was about to call you names but I thought this was funnier." he added as he held her angry gaze.

"You should have done that better. More healthy, yes." she replied as she grinned evilly. If he thought he'll escape with that, he was sooo wrong...

But what pissed her off more was his expression; normal. And blank.

"And what are you gonna do? Break my fingers?"

"That's one of the options..." she said as she tried to be mysterious… but then she realized she didn't have another plan and tried to correct the mistake. "...but mostly, yes, that would do."

"Then you can go and find someone else to help you studying..."

She immediately threw his hand back to its rightful owner. She tsked, making a sour face. Damn that Sadist, he's gonna blackmail her with that tutoring stuff for the rest of her life ... he was so annoying.

"See? That's why I didn't want to tell you about my problem, yes." she huffed.

"Fair enough, I wouldn't tell myself either."

"That was emotional blackmail!" she spat and grabbed his collar, even more annoyed that earlier.

"I know. That's why I used it."

She let go of his shirt.

"You're a horrible person." Kagura said with dead-fish eyes.

"But not the only one here." he completed with dead-fish eyes.

She frowned. "What's horrible about me? I'm beautiful, smart, strong, adorable, no one can resist Kagura-sama's charm..."

"And so modest." Sougo added ironically, rolling his eyes.

She looked at him with a bored face. "So what? Better full of myself than a dirty minded sadist."

"Yeah, better a self-proclaimed queen than a bishounen."

Kagura made a disgusted face. "Who wants to be a male? They are the most dirty minded human beings."

"Females are dirtier."

"Gintama is drew by a man." she contra attacked.

"This fanfiction is written by a girl."

"She's an exception... most hentai is drew by male artists."

"Most smut is wrote by girls"

"Master Roshi! (1)"

"Mishima Chika. (2)"

"Jiraiya! (3)"

"Yamada. (4)"

"Muttsurrini! (5)"

"Konota Izumi.(6)"

"Ryosuke Haga! (7)"

"Haruhi Suzumiya. (8)"

"Imadori Kyousuke! (9)"

"Ekaterina "Katja" Kurae. (10) And she's a sadistic, lesbian Lolita too."

She felt a hidden "Top that!" in his tone. And was that a smirk that curled his lips?!

"How about... Barney Stinson! (11) Top that if you can!"

"Oi, you two, move your lovers' spat somewhere else! I'm had read a panel for ninth times already! I personally think I could get some lines the characters throw at each other in a fight!" Ginpachi-sensei's head popped from the kitchen.

He got ignored.

"Sa-"

Crunch! Or that was the sound his skull made when Sadaharu bit his head. Strings of blood started to run down on his forehead. And cheeks. And chin.

A lot of them, actually.

"I'll call it a day, Souchirou-kun." Ginpachi commented as he picked his nose with his usual dead-fish eyes.

His daughter made the same move only that she replaced the dead-fish eyes with a troll face. "You're really bleeding there, you know." she said with a worried expression. Then she grinned widely. "It's my win!"

"Seems like only Sadaharu knows how to make males bleed regularly..." Gin-chan observed as he closed his magazine.

Then Sougo's consciousness fainted.

Ginpachi blinked. "Oh, I think he collapsed from the blood lose."

"He'll get used to it like every girl." Kagura assured him.

---

"Good night, Gin-chan!" she shouted as she closed her door room, not waiting for his reply anyway. She heard a vague "Night!" as she pulled the blanket over her head.

She sighed tiredly.

After Sadist collapsed, he didn't wake up. For like... 10 minutes.

"N-n-nee, K-K-Kagura-chan... he's not waking u-up..." Gin-chan started to sweat. Kagura blinked. "He's fine..." then after they stared at Sougo for like... another 5 minutes, her tone changed. "Right, G-G-Gin-chan...?!"

Gin-chan gulped loudly.

"I don't t-think he's alright..."

"Of course he's a-a-alright, y-y-yes." Kagura shouted as her voice cracked. She then stepped on the victim's arm lightly." S-s-see, he'll block my kick, y-yes!" She mumbled as she added some (a lot of) pressure.

He started to bleed.

"KAGURA-CHAN, HE'S NO ALRIGHT AT ALL!" Gin-chan shouted, becoming instantly a Shinpachi. He even started to play with his (imaginary) glasses just how Megane did when he freaked out.

"Waaaaaaterrrrr!" Kagura shouted as she stormed in the bathroom. "Water of liiiife!" She chanted as she turned (broke) open the tap. She filled up a bucket and stormed back to the "crime scene".

"Come on, Souchirou-kun, wake up! Wake up! Please, I'll give you 5 yens, wake uuuup!" Gin-chan pleaded desperate as he shook up violently the unconscious boy.

"Out of the waaaaayy!" Kagura yelled and threw the bucket's content on their victim.

They looked at him, whispering to each other, trying to not freak out, waiting for the effect.

It just got him wet.

Gin-chan started to sweat harder.

"Another oneeee!"a pale Kagura cried as she made another run for the bathroom, with the bucket clinging like a church bell.

So, after throwing some ice-cold water – just 20 liters – on him... he didn't wake up...

"Another 39 liters!" she yelled and sprinted energetically.

Ginpachi just opened and closed his mouth, thinking what to do with the corpse. He knew that in this relationship he should worry more about the poor human being. He just knew... but his overprotective father side took over and… well this happened. He crossed his arms over his chest and sighed as he shook his head.

"Man, this is no good... and neither is the courtyard, because we don't have one..."

"Danna, stop thinking where to hide my body." a monotonous voice broke his string of where-to-bury-a body thoughts.

"Souchirou-kun!"

Suddenly, a tornado with a bucket appeared next to him and threw almost-frozen water on the said guy.

Then she observed he was up.

"Sadist!" Kagura exclaimed, her eyes wide opened in surprise. She dropped the steel bucket on the ground and it made a horrible metallic sound that made both men to cover their ears and close their eyes in pain.

Which means they missed the glint of relief that flashed her eyes for a mere second...

She stuck her little finger in her nostril, looking at him with dead-fish eyes. "Good you're awake. Go and make me a sandwich."

He stared at her with a blank expression. "I seriously pity the poor, broke-inside, guy who'll be your boyfriend..."

"That's you." Gin-chan said in his hoarse voice. He got ignored.

She frowned.

"Or any alive person that who would stay around you." he continued, ignoring her confusion.

"And you're also one of them." Gin-chan coughed..

"W-why...?" She asked, chanting in her mind that her voice didn't crack at all.

He stared at her, his face as serious as it never had been.

She gulped and tried to maintain his gaze. His gravity made her feel insecure and the way his eyes literally buried into hers, studying her every little move made her nervous and aware of her actions or words. Heck, even Gin-chan went completely quiet. And Sadist became so solemn that it hurts. His words made her stomach twist painfully, but she didn't blink no matter what. He knew her well enough to not take her words to heart... right?

Damn it! The atmosphere was so tensed, one could cut it with a bread-knife and make a sandwich.

She gulped soundly when he opened his mouth.

"Because that not how you take care of someone with a blood lose." he dead-panned.

Diiiiiieeee!

(Un)fortunately, Gin-chan caught her in time, saving the sadistic brat, at least this time. She struggled from her surrogate dad's grip but it was no use, as he held her tight 'till she calmed down.

"Good night, Danna." the young boy bowed. Ginpachi nodded in response. The little gesture made him realize how awkward it must be for the other two, with him holding his girlfriend still, so he released Kagura. If she is still mad at you, you deal with her, Souchirou-kun.

But he remained within call just to make sure.

She swallowed hard, waiting for her own share of "good night". Because they telepathically agreed that a good night kiss was too mainstream...

He looked at her, dead-panned. "Don't forget to read your notes before you go to sleep."

"I hope you'll dream of zombies Mayora eating your brain." she dead-panned.

...seems like "good night" was too mainstream too...

He waved and exited their apartment.

God, the damn sadist sure was complicated... Sure, sadomasochists are complicated by nature, but he was way too complex and confusing for anyone's good. Not to say that sometimes he made her doubt her own nature. I mean, what mentally healthy girl would stay around him?!

...Though she wasn't really the most easy to handle person...

That didn't matter!

"Oh, well, whatever." She mumbled as she rubbed her eyes. "Ladies need their beauty sleep, yes." She covered her mouth as she yawned sleepily. "Jerks should get out of theirs minds when it's bed time, yes." She nodded to herself, half asleep. She covered her head with the blanket and flew to the lands of dreams...

Or maybe not.

She woke up in a fancy hammock, like the one you usually see a sailor sleeping in.

"Do you think we should stop tonight in the nearly port for a drink, Captain? Please keep in mind I'm still in need of sugar." Gin-chan said casually, dressed in his usual loosely style... Only that he had a eye-pack on his head and a hat and he looked like he was role-playing a pirate. A loosely clothed one, but a pirate.

She blinked.

"And mayonnaise." said another pirate-style clothed man. Mayora, to be exact.

"No mayonnaise. I don't want to see people eating that dog shit on this ship." Gin-chan dead-panned.

A vein popped on Mayora's forehead. "Kuree! What do you call dog shit, huh? Dare to say that again!" Hijikata shouted, protecting his beloved mayo.

Gin-chan's lips curled in a smirk. "My, my, Oogushi-kun, that's not a proper way to talk to your master."

The said "Oogushi-kun" clenched his fists helpless.

"Why do I have to be your slave? The captain is China-musume, right? Why am I your slave?" he grimaced disgusted, then he turned toward Kagura. "Oi, China-musume, release me!" At her bored stare, he added with a bargaining tone." C-come on! Sougo's not gonna like it!"

That caught Kagura's attention. "Go on..." she commanded warily.

"It will upset Sougo greatly to know that I'm running free and I can do what the hell I want and he can't do nothing to disturb me! Doesn't that sound awesome?"

She rubbed her chin thoughtfully, just like Gin-chan would do when she'd ask him if she can go out. She nodded warily. "Yeah..." It did indeedly sound great.

Hijikata's face brightened as he nodded with her in an idiotic way. "See? It's a great idea!"

"Yeah..."

Hijikata blinked nervous. He was pretty desperate. "So?"

"No."

"Whyyy?!"

"Because I don't like you." she said with dead-fish eyes as she chewed an ice-cream wooden stick lazily.

Ginpachi patted the Mayo-lover's shoulder. "Poor Oogushi-kun, no one likes you..." he sighed he shook his head with fake disappointment.

"You're not the one to talk, kure!" Hijikata shouted annoyed by the pitiful look Gin-chan gave him. "You're one of the worst main characters Jump ever had!"

Gin-chan's look suddenly changed. "Haa? What did you said?! I'm the most..."

Kagura didn't pay attention to their blabbering, she made her way out of their verbal fight. As much as she wanted to mock Mayora and fight along Gin-chan, she got business to do. After all, being a pirate captain wasn't easy. She got sooo much food to eat and treasures to steal...

"Aree, Kagura-chan?"

"Anego!" Kagura smiled as she took the spyglass away from her eye to see her better. Big-sis was wearing a loose shirt under a black vest and a pair of brown pants.

"As expected of Anego, anything not feminine fits her!"

Anego smiled her trademark smile. Kagura smiled back genuinely. Anego is so beautiful when she smiles.

"I know right China-san! Everything fits Otae-san, especially those beautiful pants!" Gorilla popped out of nowhere, laughing awkwardly as he rubbed his nape.

Anego smiled.

Kagura looked at him with dead-fish eyes. She started to count: 3, 2, 1... and then... nothing... Huh?

*CRACK!* Gorilla's face was distorted to tears by Anego's pro-boxer punch and he went flying 'till his body hit the ship's board. "That's a skirt, you useless stalker! At least do your job, idiot!" she shouted as she kicked the man, sending him flying three meters away from their ship.

He landed in the water with a splash sound.

"K-Kondou-san?! Man over board!" a voice yelled.

"No one cares about Gorilla here." someone said with dead-fish eyes as they picked their nose.

"Shut up!"

"So, Kagura-chan, what are you doing here?"

"Huh... ah, just the usual captain job, yes!" She stopped to think a little. She was still young, so it wasn't out of place for her to ask the elders. "Gin-chan think we should make port tonight. What do you think, Anego?"

Big-sis's face suddenly brightened and she clapped her hands in enthusiasm. "That's a great idea!" She cheered. That was good... "That way we can do some grocery shopping. We ran out of a lot of things..."

"Sukonbu!" Kagura burst out. "I think I ran out of salt for sukonbu, yes!"

" Oh, and also, I asked Tama-san if I can make tamagoyaki for dinner tonight and she agreed!" Anego cheered. That was not good...

"Then I'll go and tell to the helms(wo)man to head toward the port." Kagura said with a pale face. I wonder, can I make Sadist to eat my share? She shook her head. Not even that bastard deserves such a fate. I'll give it to Gorilla...

"Oh, Kagura-chan, can I go instead? I wanna chat a little with Kyuu-chan... I think she feels lonely." Big-sis said with sad eyes.

"Sure!" Kagura smiled. "Not only you can, it's an order!" She added playfully, with the air of a commander.

Anego laughed. "Understood, Captain!" she said with a semi serious face and saluted Kagura militarily.

She responded with the same type of salute and a serious face which she kept 'till Anego went out of her sight.

She directed her attention to the horizon, admiring its vast blue-green. She rested her head on the bulwark's surface as her eyes followed the waves. Even though they crushed against the ship, it was so harmonic. Everything. The sound, the ocean's smell, the flying fishes, the colours. "Hoist... the... colours..." (12) she singed softly as she stared at the water beneath her.

She felt the breeze blowing through her hair and messing with her bangs. But she didn't care. She felt so relaxed. The way it caressed her face way so enjoyable. She closed her eyes for a little...

And she felt asleep.

"LAAAND!"

"Already?!" Kagura cried out when the scream woke her up. She rubbed her eyes sleepily. Just how much did I slept?!

"Alright, maties! We're staying here 'till tomorrow, so solve your problems 'till then!" Gin-chan shouted to the crew. "Be careful to not be left behind, the ship's not turning back for you, you morons!"

He earned a punch/kick in the guts from both Anego and Mayora. "Who are you calling moron, kure?!"

"Hijikata-san...!"

"My, my, Gin-san, watch the language." she smiled. "Or else, I'll tear apart your *********." she added with a scary face.

"Ane-ue!" cried the younger Shimura.

"Aren't you the one talking dirty?" shouted Mayora.

Kagura rubbed her eyes as her men (and women) made a fuss. "So noisy..." she yawned. Well, she was used to this so, if she was sleepy enough it wouldn't even bother her. But she wasn't. Good, now let's head to sukonbu!

"Those idiots... now I need a parfait!" Gin-chan mumbled as he held his tummy. "Ah, Kagura-chan, that slave of yours left the ship just a little earlier to meet his sister."

Kagura looked at him with dead-fish eyes. "Who?"

All she had in her mind was sukonbu.

"Souchirou-kun."

"Who?"

And sukonbu only.

Gin-chan frowned. "That sadistic brat you call a boyfriend..."

"Who?"

Sukonbu?

"That idiotic haraguro you always fight with!" He said as a vein popped on his forehead.

"Who?"

Gin-chan looked like sukonbu.

"Oi, Kagura-chan, are you listening? I said that masochist who suddenly challenges you just to get himself beat to a pulp!"

"Who?"

"Are you listening?! That siskon, Light-kun's perfect replica!"

"Who?"

Gin-chan smelled like sukonbu...

"He wants to bury Oo-"

"'SUKONBUUUU!'" She roared and stormed toward the town... knocking Gin-chan out of his feet like a bowling ball.

"Now I really need a parfait..." he groaned as he rubbed his head.

Her sprint ended at the nearly grocery store... Where was the biggest queue she ever saw. So, she waited. Patiently.

'Till she saw Yamazaki. Her face brightened. She sneaked next to him discreetly, apologizing for the trouble – "Go and suck your mommy tits, you loser!" – and asked Zaki nicely to buy her some sukonbu – "Oi, Zaki! Buy your captain some sukonbu, 'kuree!'" she said in a hoarse tone with a stick in her mouth.

"U-u-understood, fukuchou!" he cried in response.

They didn't have any. They never heard of it.

Kagura blinked, then punched the old man who kept bulging her. Yamazaki gulped. She blinked again and not wanting to waste time, she just shouted "Whaaaaaat?! How come you don't have sukonbu? You are so useless, why did your mother make you anyway, huh? Better go and pick dogs poop from park as long as it is still warm!" mockingly and made her way out of the store.

"Umm, by the way, do have salt for sukonbu by any chance?" she came back and asked respectfully.

She got kicked out.

"How am I suppose to (threat Sadist to) make sukonbu when I don't have salt for it?!" she cried out loud as she walked back to the ship, literally dragging her feet. She tried in every grocery store she could and she got kicked out of every grocery she could because of her potty mouth. Like Go back in your papi's b*lls! is bad language! Or You don't need ketchup, lady, your dog's period is red enough to color your soup, so let me pass!

"That's not foul language!" she spat, then suddenly turned around and put her hands around her mouth, like a megaphone. "You should hear Gin-chan when he runs out of toilet paper!" she howled to the peaceful town she left behind. That felt good. "You should all go back in your mothers' womb! We'll never make port here again!" she howled as loudly as she could, unleashing her frustration to her heart content.

"Oh, that's too bad, I live here..."

Kagura turned a 180 degree when she heard a sigh of concern and her eyes met a beautiful woman. She had long light brown hair tied in two braids and was wearing a wreath of forget-me-not, with a few sakura flowers around her head.(13) The woman's red-wine eyes studied her from head to toe. "So, you are Sadist's girlfriend, huh?"

Kagura blinked. "You are... Ane-ue?" she asked, still not believing that she met his sister.

"Yup!" the woman smiled warmly. "And you are... the Queen of Kabuki-cho, Kagura-sama, right?"

"Right, yes!" she cheered, happy that she met his sister.

Key word(s): his sister. In your face, Sadist!

The woman clapped her hands with excitement. "Oh, I'm so happy I met you! I just visited your ship. You are a great captain, Kagura-sama!"

"Thank you for your kind words, Ane-ue!" Kagura smiled.

The older woman looked at her with sad eyes and mumbled softly. "But you wouldn't make port here anymore..."

Kagura eyes went wide open in realization. She panicked and started to shook her hands in the air. "N-no, no, no! I didn't mean what I said, Ane-ue! I was only mad at them, yes! P-please don't be sad! Of course we'll make port here, yes! After all Ane-ue is here, yes!" She stopped to catch her breath.

"That's wonderful!" The light-brown haired woman smiled genuinely. "I was starting to worry..." she murmured.

"D-don't... worry, yes!" panted Kagura, then she took a big mouth of air and finally calmed her breath. "How about we take a wa-"

Her conversation partner suddenly started to fret, as if she just remembered something.

"Oh, I totally forgot." She looked at Kagura with sadness in her eyes. "I'm sorry, Kagura-sama, I can't stay with you any longer, I have some business in town." She bowed. "I'm really sorry, I hope we can meet again."

Kagura shook her hands in embarrassment. "Please don't worry about it! After all, I'm sure we'll see each other again!" She smiled, hoping to ease the atmosphere.

And she did.

"That's a relief." Then, to Kagura's embarrassment, she bowed again. "Please take care of Sadist. He may be a total douche bag, black-hearted idiot, but he is still my little brother. Make sure you keep him healthy and clean. And be careful to put him to sleep so that he sleeps enough at night. If he's naughty, please do not hesitate to show him who's the master. He tends to forget sometime."

Kagura blinked. "He told you about our bet?" she asked surprised, then she leaned toward the woman and whispered with a mocking face. "He lost it, by the way."

"No, he didn't tell me. But it's kind of obvious who's the master here, right?" The older Okita asked rhetorically as she chuckled.

Kagura giggle in response. God, this woman was awesome!

"Then, I hope to see you as soon as possible." The woman smiled and waved as she walked away.

Kagura smiled as she waved back. She watched her new friend 'till she got out of her sight, then closed her umbrella and proceeded to run back to the docks. After all, the sun was about to set and if she didn't hurry back, she will lose her main light source. Well, at least it was a good thing she didn't have to hold her parasol anymore.

She stopped when her feet touched something that made a distinctive sound. She smiled.

The sand.

She turned her head toward left and looked at the ocean. All that was left behind from the sun was a tiny, tiny, almost imperceptible line of bright reddish-orange surrounded by bright pink and violet clouds. And the sky. Which was getting darker and darker.

Not a good sight when you still have a half hour of running to do. But it still was beautiful.

Kagura took a deep breath and began to run. Sand got in her shoes as she crossed the beach. She got to the shore, turned left and ran on it's line, her shoes making squelching sound and getting all wet. She stopped, took them off and got back at her running while enjoying the nice feeling of sand being sucked from her bare feet for a second by the waves.

It was quite dark when she finally got to the ship. She climbed in and lightened a match. She walked around on the board, searching for her crew.

No one.

She checked the kitchen and crew's compartment and the entire inside of the ship. Even her own cabin and Sadaharu's favorite places.

Purely empty.

She was the only soul on this ship. Heck, even the dog was gone.

And there wasn't any food.

She headed toward the oarsmen' place, wondering if she can find some food there. Maybe they saved some leftovers, if not, she'll have to eat the ship... She struggled. She didn't feel like eating wood...

She went downstairs and there he saw him, sleeping nonchalantly in the oarsmen's watchman place with his eye mask on, even.

Which meant his guard was down. Kagura smirked. Bad move for him.

She walked straight to the hammock and poked the leg that was out, making it to swing back and forth.

He didn't wake up.

She grinned, but warily waved a hand at him. No move. She blew hot air into his ear.

Nothing.

She grinned widely.

Animated by the idea, she started to search for something to put some water in. He was the one inventive when it came to pranks, but sometimes old tricks did the job well enough.

She found an ancient half broke bowl. Good enough. She filled it up with Tsukki's lotion and placed the bowl right under his hand that was hanging out. She took the bowl from the ground and slowly lifted it up 'till his hand got in its content.

She bit her cheek to suppress her giggling and waited for him to wet his pants.

But nothing happened.

Huh?

She looked closely. Yep, his pants were as clean and dry as before. What was going on...?

"Just what made you think I was sleeping?" A voice deadpanned and when she rose her head, she got liquid flinched at her face. "And stop staring at my crotch." He flinched his fingers again, wet drops suddenly hitting her face.

She frowned and looked at his pants again. "It didn't... work..." she mumbled then looked him in the eyes. "Why it didn't work, Sadist? You were supposed to get wet, yes."

"Because I was awake." He deadpanned as he pushed her head away from his crotch. He got up and stretched his hand to grab a bottle from the floor. "But I do know who's gonna get wet tonight." he smirked as he brought the bottle closer to his lips and titled in upwards.

"That's Tsukki's lotion." She deadpanned.

He spat it right away.

"What are you doing here?" he asked with a nothing-happened-here tone, though he kept wiping his mouth with his palm.

"What do you mean? This my ship." Well, actually Baba's, but... she frowned. "The real question is what are you doing in the watchman's bed?" She asked warily. No one sane enough would give away their watchman post...right?

"We switched."

"No way! He would never switch! He hated the rowing job too much!" she exclaimed.

She flinched when she suddenly woke up with his face a few inches away from hers.

"How comes you know so much about the watchman?" He asked as he closed the distance between them a little, making her back away. "Did you committed adultery with him, China?" he hummed smoothly and made another step forward.

She warily took a step back.

"How can I commit adultery?! We're not married..." she stopped and her eyes wide opened, realizing that she may be wrong. "...right?" She stuttered. She just made that out right now, for God's sake! As a captain, she couldn't care less about the watchman!

...well, actually she couldn't care less about the ex-watchman.

"Now, now..." he smirked as he rose his arms. She thought he wanted to place them on the both sides of her head, hence catch her again and that thought snapped her back to reality. Automatically, she took another step back...

...and felt on the hammock.

"Ow!"

"Heh."

He grabbed the hammock's side string in his both hands and leaned forward, catching her between himself and the other string. She could feel it against her back, pushing her toward him and forbidding her to back away.

"So easy to trick." he leaned and whispered near her ear, intentionally blowing hot air in it.

She blushed lightly and used the crook of his collarbone to hide her face in. She buried her face deeper in it, her lips brushing past his neck's sensitive skin.

Not like she missed him. Nope, no way.

She was just trying to make him blush. She surely wasn't trying to hide her blush. Nope, that neither.

He wrapped his arms around her waist, closing the distance between their bodies as much as he humanly could. She closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him close. She could feel his warmth through his thin cotton shirt. He slowly slid his hands on her body, from her waist up to her shoulders and she jumped in her skin, enjoying the warm feeling...

Then he suddenly grabbed her shoulders and pulled her away.

She looked at him with surprise in her cerulean eyes, perhaps a little disappointed – she liked that crook, why did he had to pull her away? – and met two bloody red irises filled with lust.

He parted his lips a little and leaned toward her while slowly closing his eyes.

She leaned back a little, even thought she was forcing the string.

He felt that his lips didn't meet hers, so he tried to close the distance a little more.

She backed a little more.

He leaned toward her one or two inch more.

She backed away one or two inch more. As she felt that the string couldn't take any more of her backing away and that if she tried to force it, it will send her flying into him like a ping-pong ball, she kicked his jamb like it was a ball and she wanted to score no matter what. Which translated would be like: hard.

He yelped in pain and his eyes flung open to see what's going on, but it was too late: his foot slipped already and so, he fell face straight in the hammock.

"What the hell, China?!" he groaned when he finally realized what she was trying to do all this time.

She watched him as he used his hands to lift himself up, so that the twines wouldn't leave a mark on his pretty face. Ugh... those things must hurt... she thought from her comfortable position, with her feet under her and her thighs glued to his. It was funny how many people can fit in a hammock if you crowded them a little.

He suddenly flipped himself on his back and shot her a glare. She smirked in response. Must probably he thought he'll scare her, but, must probably, he didn't know that it was exactly what she wanted him to do.

She hovered over him, all the while trapping him in the hammock, with her body as a lid. Not that he minded, anyway.

He lips curled in a smirk. "My, my China, wanting to go on top that bad?" he asked mockingly.

"The captain always goes on top, yes!" She uttered, but her statement just widened his sneering smile.

Which means he could see that her cheeks colored in a soft shape of red and that she was trembling. Almost unnoticeable, but trembling. She would have blame it on hammock as it was swinging them like babies, but she could feel her palms sweating...

Just trust Sadist to feel your weakness. It's his hobby.

"If you say so..." came his deliberately late reply.

She grabbed his collar and crushed her lips with his, shutting that annoying mouth of his. She could feel his surprise, as he stopped breathing for a second, but he recomposed himself quickly and returned the kiss while nonchalantly let his hands roam free all over her body.

She jumped in her skin and parted her lips to deepen the kiss. She moaned. She started to feel all warm and fuzzy inside and she ran her tongue over his lips, as they were dry and felt like cotton...

Then she suddenly couldn't breath.

Her eyes flung wide open and she jumped up on her bottom. She held into the pillow tightly as she panted heavily, her face all flushed and warm and her night-clothes disheveled.

She sighed when she finally managed to calm down. Damn it! How came she nearly suffocated herself by making out passionately with a pillow?! No, no, no, wait! How came she ended up making out with a pillow...?!

Kagura shook her head furiously. Pillow or not, it was him in the dream and his personality and scent and lips...

She suddenly got up and... nearly slipped when she made a run to the bathroom. There she opened the tap and threw some ice-cold water in her face, then rose her head and looked at the mirror...

...and met a red tomato with sky-blue eyes...

She blocked the sink's drain, then rotated open the tap with a poker face and let the cold water fill it up. When the sink was full, she calmly closed the tap and...

...violently threw her face inside the sink.

The water was good. It felt like taking a shower... down there. It was peaceful. All she could hear was the silence... hear the silence... She slowly started to not feel her cheeks anymore. Her nose and chin we're already out of question. Then it became better, she couldn't feel the cold anymore. The water was good. It was warm...

"Oi, Kagura-chan, get out of the bathroom! Did you fall in the WC? No? Then get out! There are others people who want to feel like a king and sit on the throne!" shouted Gin-chan as he knocked desperately at the door.

"But Gin-chan, I'm the queen, yes!" Kagura yelled after she took her head out of the water.

"Every queen needs a king, so let the king take his rightful place, okay?!"

"But Mami told me that every man needs a determined woman!"

She heard him squealing. "K-K-Kagura-chan j-just let this poor man use the bathroom, o-o-okay...?"

Kagura took out her toothbrush. "No." she replied and started to brush her teeth.

"Whyyy?!" he cried from behind the door.

She took her toothbrush out of her mouth. "Because only the king can use the throne, Gin-chan." She spat. "Like you said: It's his rightful place."

*SKRRREEEK!*

At the sudden nails-scratching-the-door sound she just rose her shoulders puzzled and went back at her brushing.

Alright, it was normal to have fantasizes with your boyfriend – heck, it was even indicated! With Sadist, on the other hand, was a big no, no!

Unfortunately, they were the very same person...

What am I supposed to do if the next time those dreams go all the way...? This normal and innocent thought just popped in her mind as she rinsed her mouth.

But then her fresh hormones-awoke brain started to picture her and Sadist doing... unspeakable things at which she blushed like a maiden she was.

She shook her head furiously, determined to erase those clear and explicit images then rinsed her mouth again and exited the bathroom. She was heading toward her room to change her pajamas when she saw it.

It was leaning with his back on the bathroom's door wall, sitting on its bottom. A corpse. Without a doubt, a corpse.

His face had a cadaverous color, pale with violet shapes under his eyes and in the holes of his sucked cheeks. He kept his hands near his body, but they gave off a lifeless feeling.

Yep, definitely a corpse.

She poked his cheek with her finger. "Gin-chan, what are you doing on the floor?" she asked innocently.

The corpse opened his mouth and moaned a summoning in response. "B-bathroom..."

Dead-fish eyed, Kagura headed toward her room to change.

---

China yawned and let her head drop on the desk. He knew that because, even if he had his eye-mask on, he could hear her movement even in that infernal hullabaloo their class made. They were waiting for their math teacher to come. He was late, which mean 3Z was in a total chaos. As usual, it started with Kondou-san jumping at Ane-go. As usual, she responded by sending him flying gently with her monstrous punch.

Hijikata-san yelled and ran after the unidentified flying object. It suddenly transformed in a boomerang and returned obediently to Ane-go.

She sent him flying again. This time with a pro-wrestler kick in the crotch.

Hijibaka-san followed him again. He touched Kyuubei's shoulder in his rush.

She flushed as her eyes became a spiral. She grabbed him by collar and threw him over the shoulder. Shoulder for shoulder!

Feeling that the atmosphere became perfect, Sougo challenged China by throwing a book in her head. She roared and literally jumped at him, with a book in her hands.

The two rivals had their book-shot war. Aimed hit after aimed hit. Dodge after dodge. Kick after kick. Punch after punch...

They stopped and looked at each other.

"Not feeling like fighting?" he asked as he delivered another hit with the book, but just in a just-for-the-sake-of-it way.

"Kind of, yes." She said as she blocked his hit with her book, but in the same mechanic style.

They both got up and went back to their places, where Sougo took out his eye-mask and rested his head on the desk.

He opened his eyes even thought the mask was still on. Something felt off... China was quiet. And she didn't use to be quiet. Especially not if he let his guard down.

He lifted a little the edge of his mask and met a pair of blue eyes staring at his face. She had an absent-minded, idiotic – yet adorable, admit it, Sougo! – look in her eyes as she rested her head on the desk in the same manner as him and gazed at him in mesmerize. It took her a second to realize that he took his mask off and when she did, she flushed instantly and turned her head away the next moment in embarrassment.

He smirked. To tease or not to tease, that was the question...

The door suddenly opened and a man entered. The class stopped in its tracks and everyone except them went back to their places. The teacher cleared his throat in a dramatic manner. "Today I brought your papers." he said.

The class just watched him quietly in response.

The man sighed. "I am really disappointed by you."

Silence.

...I have no words about your tests..."

"Why...?" China murmured softly into the desk, not lifting her head from its place.

But their classmates heard her anyway.

"But why? Are they so bad, sensei?" Katsura asked out loud.

The teacher sighed again. "Worse than bad. For example..." he responded, then made a pause as he took the first paper from the table. "...for example Kondou Isao-kun wrote at the first question:

"3674 + 135 X 23/4 = 36/2x + 4.

3674 + 540 X 23/4 = ...

A banana + a banana = two bananas = a happy monkey (gorilla)

A happy gorilla + a banana + a sad gorilla = ?

Happy gorilla-(banana) Sad gorilla = 2 happy gorillas.

2 happy gorillas + (infinite) sweet love = (infinite) baby gorillas!

Please give me a high mark because: x =...

"... OTAE-SAN!"

CRASH! Ane-go threw the biggest geography atlas in Kondou-san's nape, which made his head to hit the desk as a bonus. "Just what make you think I'd give you babies gorillas?" she asked sweetly.

He turned toward her with teary eyes. "Because you are so kind, you turn me o-"

She punched his face very kindly. "Korrraa, I'm not a gorilla!"

All the tsukkomis in the class sweat dropped.

The teacher cleared his throat awkwardly.

"And Shimura Tae-san wrote:

"(65/7 + 175/12) / 122 + 3/152 = 10x + 2...

2 is not for a girl, a ten would fit better, right sensei? And because I am a good student, you will give high mark to keep my GPA steady, right?...

The moment he stopped, Ane-go smiled her trade mark smile.

The class sweat dropped. She was threatening him...

... Or... oh, I know, I can cook you some tamagoyaki!"

No, now she was threatening him!

"Way to go, Ane-go." China, who seemed to feel better, jumped and cheered.

"And you, Kagura-san, you wrote:

"357 + 23/6 + x3... why "x", yes? "S" from sukonbu would be better!

Because I told you about sukonbu, can you please buy me some sukonbu while you give me a high mark at math, yes?"

"Will you?" she asked innocently.

"No!"

China made a potty face. Sougo smirked to himself. If China would ever remain in the last class of high-school, he would reorient and become a teacher just for the sake of teasing.

Yeah... no. Too much of a headache.

"And Okita Sougo-san wrote... oh, he actually solved the exercises to a point..."

Sougo looked at the teacher with dead-fish eyes. He may have spent too much time with Danna's daughter. The teacher kept on talking anyway.

"...he was at:"

"[(35/4) / 34 + 6x] = 104 + 3x + 2c X 2c

[(35/4) / 34 + 6x] = 104 + 4c + 3x...

3x + 4c... xxx + 4c... xxx Ch... (14)

I'll make sure Hijikata-san dies from a natural cause if you give me a high mark."

"Kuree! How do you plan to make sure that my death is natural?!" Hijikata tried to hit him with his blade, but the youngest dodged his attack with a bored look.

"And you, Hijikata-kun." The oldest man started as he searched in the pile of papers. "You wrote..." he stopped when he reached the last one and started again, with a confused expression. "Huh, it seems that I lost your paper. I wonder where can it be..."

"Burning." Came the answer from both him and the girl from his right. (15)

"Kuree!"

"It seems like you'll have to take the test again, Mayora." She grinned.

"I'll kill ya'!"

"Sensei, there is a violent dog-shit eater in this class. Save us!" Sougo dead-panned as he dodged Hijibaka-san's furious hits and flying books.

"Yeah, like Sadist said." She yelled as she dodged Mayora's blows. "Catch him and lock him in a dirty bird cage!"

"Good one, China."

"Stop talking like Gin-san, Kagura-chan! And sensei, stop them!" The Megane cried in despair.

"Shimura-kun, you wrote..."

The class suddenly became quiet and everyone took their places.

Megane sweat-dropped.

" 106 +...

Please give a high mark so I can transfer from this chaos. Thank you very much!"

The class started again. To Shinpachi's and the teacher's horror.

Ane-go and Kyuubei were discussing the last night TV drama. Sougo and China finally responded to Hijikata-san's attacks, but the man remained alive, unfortunately. The old lady and the other old lady started to make faces and comment the class... 'till Kondou-san went flying and knocked them. They started to step on him furiously.

He and China started to fight again, not having a common enemy anymore. Sweet rivalry.

Kondou-san went flying in Katsura and his weird... pet? Kondou-san told him to cut his hair. Katsura refused. Kondou-san started to gesticulate... and Sougo lost the scene, as China suddenly became serious and used her bag as a weapon... then the chair...

Sougo smirked as he send flying some scissors as kunais. Sweet rivalry indeed.

...then she lifted the desk...

"SILENCE!"

Their classmates suddenly stopped and instinctively went back to their places again. Sighing, Sougo took his seat. Kagura let down the desk and did the same. They pissed off the teacher. Even Shinpachi gulped, though he haven't done anything bad...

"I'm fed up by this class!" he shouted to them. "All you can do is to fight and hit the others..." he looked at the relatively young students.

Otose and Catherine smiled superiorly.

"...or insult and critic the others!" he shot a glare to the old women. "But I can careless about that! Is all your class master problem!"

"Then?"

"Sougo!" Hijikata hissed at the boy's rudeness.

"Then?" The teacher asked rhetorically. "Then the problem is that you wrote on your math papers that you want higher marks at math..."

The class looked at him with bored expressions. "So?"

"So?" His voice dripped with sarcasm. "I'm not your math teacher!" he shouted.

Silence.

What?!

"And this wasn't a math test!"

"Huh...?"

Then...

"This is physiology!"

"EEEEH?!"

---

"Kagura-chan, do you want some tamagoyaki?" Otae asked cheerfully.

"E-eh..." Kagura tried to refuse but as she gesticulated clumsily, Ane-go put the Dark Matter in her bento box. She sighed, accepting her painful death.

"Shimura-san!" One of their classmates called Ane-go. She turned and walked toward the person to find out what they wanted.

Kagura looked at her culinary punishment with fear. Seriously, sometime she asked herself if Sadist and Gin-chan were the only Do-S of Gintama. She seriously doubted that...

"Pst!" Suddenly Kyuubei leaned toward her in a secretive manner. Curious, the younger girl leaned toward her and tilted her head to get the message better. Kyuubei whispered carefully in her ear. "You can give it to me, if you want..."

PUFF! In an instant the Dark Matter was teleported in Kyuubei's bento.

"Oh, I see. Thank you very much." Ane-go giggled as she bid goodbye to the boy and headed back to them. "I just got three tickets to the new movie. It's tomorrow, right after school. Wanna go? Also, I was wondering, how about we go in a girls' day out after the movie?" She asked and Kyuubei face lightened. "Sounds great, Tae-chan!"

Ane-go smiled in response, then looked at the other girl. "And you, Kagura-chan?"

"Of course I'm coming, yes! Tomorrow is a boring day for me, I don't have anything to do, ye-..." suddenly her eyes wide opened in realization. "Sadist!" she exclaimed and jumped from her place. Which confused the other two.

"What about Okita-san?"

"Nothing important. " Kagura assured with a hand gesture, but she started to pack her things in a hurry. "I just forgot to... negotiate something with him, yes..." she said and stormed to search the boy, letting the other two girls puzzled.

---

Pissed of. Frustrated. Annoyed. Call it any way you want, she felt it to the fullness.

And the damn bastard wasn't listening to her!

"I can't believe it! I said perfectly the lesson at geography and I... didn't write about the Neo Armstrong Cyclone Jet Armstrong Cannon at the history test! I made everything perfect! And now the psycho teacher gave to all the class an E! Just how am I supposed to rise my GPA?!" She cried out loud her complain and looked at her companion. He was eating silently. Ignoring her.

She squinted her eyes. Slowly, she leaned closer to him with an annoyed expression and started to shout in his ear. "My GPA is going doooow-"

He quickly shoved in her mouth the shrimp that he had in his chopsticks.

Then went back to his eating.

"O-oi...!" She made a pout as she chewed soundly. That's rudeness! Sure, the shrimp was amazing, but it was still rude!

"Keep quiet and I'll give you another."

What?! Who did he think he was?! Just how rude did he plan to be?! That was unacceptable! Pure rudeness! No manners! And he thought she'll bear with his s**tty behavior?! No sir!

He picked up another piece of meat from his bento and directed his chopsticks to her mouth.

Kagura frowned at the round piece of fried chicken, then turned her head to a side. He was treating her like an animal! She grit her teeth. Using food to shut me up...! Unacceptable! Who cares that it's food?! But it's...food...

She turned her head and took the chicken. It was food. Something that made her happy. Why would she refuse something that made her happy?

She chewed with a complicated face. "Why are you so good at cooking...?" She mumbled after she gulped.

He rose his shoulders indifferently. Then he grinned when he realized something. "You do know that you just praised me, right?"

She blushed. "T-that's not t..." Yes she did. Indirectly, but she did. "I-it's not like... you didn't... know it... already." her voice faded and slowly became a whisper.

"Huh?"

She flushed another shape of red. "N-nothing!" she mumbled "...and give me those!" She pulled his chopsticks out of his hands, made the hand gesture as she shouted "Thank you for the food!" then started to devour his bento.

He sighed. That China... then he observed those two wood sticks poking from her furoshiki (16). He looked at her with dead-fish eyes, resisting the urge to hit her head. In her hunger she totally forgot that she has her own chopsticks. What an idiot... He rose his shoulder in a well-can't-help-it manner and took her chopsticks and bento.

He seriously started to consider making her lunch box because her only-rice-bento was simply boring. Of course, he could fight for his own. But not with China and not when it came to food. He knew at least that much.

The poor boy took a shrimp from his box and with some rice from hers and some sauce from his... it looked like a decent meal.

Then the bell rang.

"Ar-ready?!" She complained as she stuffed some more rice in her mouth.

Sougo rolled his eyes and got up. "You ate my lunch, you pack it." ." He dead-panned as he made his leave.

"H-hey!" He could hear her calling after him as he walked slowly toward their class. She was probably hurrying to pack their things and catch up with him. How cute, right?...

All she wanted was to kick his a** for leaving her behind.

The next moment he heard footsteps getting closer with speed, he made a ran for it. "O-oi! Stop running, I wouldn't hurt you!" She shouted after him as she panted.

Yeah, sure, and he has a pair of talking panties...

He suddenly turned to the left. China anticipated his move – maybe because they were in the same class? – and did the same thing. His short hair was fluttering because of the wind his movement created. China was getting closer. A teacher yelled at them to stop running on the corridors. China was getting closer. They almost reached their destination, as he could already see the classroom's door and Danna.

China was getting closer...

Wait... what?!

China was getting closer...

Not that! The other one... the one before!

... as he could already see the classroom's door and Danna.

Yeah, that one!... Wait, Danna?!

Sougo stopped short the moment he realized the teacher was waiting for the class to gather back in the classroom from the break. Ginpachi-sensei was never ever waiting for them. They were the ones waiting for him. Which meant they were in trouble.

BANG! China crushed into him from behind.

"Ouch! Sadist, don't stop so suddenly, you idiot!" She groaned in annoyance. She almost split the delicious food and that would be a shame, mind you!

Silence.

Huh? she blinked puzzled. Damn him and his big back! She couldn't see a thing because of it! And why did he had to be this tall?

She leaned the lunch boxes against his back and pushed his head to a side to see forward. And she saw Ginpachi. In front of the classroom. In the break. Waiting for them. Not good. I mean, he was most of the times late. Sure, exceptions were... there weren't any exceptions!

"Aree, Ginpachi-sensei?" Otae asked confused. She just came back from the lunch break and found their teacher waiting for the class. Since the man remained as quiet as a grave, she gave Kagura a worried look. The other girl rose her shoulders in response.

Finally, the whole class gathered... in front of the class and looking curiously at their class master.

"Oi, get in the classroom, kuree!"

Protesting mumbles were heard as they stopped from rubbernecking like idiots and entered the classroom, with Kagura and Sougo ahead. To Kagura's worry, Gin-chan waited for everyone to get inside, and only after that he entered the class.

Usually, he would enter first.

They all took their respective seats. The whole room was covered in an uneasy atmosphere. Kagura gulped and looked at her usual, annoying companion. He looked relaxed...

F**k him, he looked relaxed!

Sitting at his desk with his usual deadpan. No worry. No rooting on the floor because of Gin-chan behavior and seriousness... Why was he so relaxed?!

"Ouch! What the... China...!" He glared at her, holding her textbook. Good, at least her book reached its aim. His bored face.

He threw the book back and his aim would had been perfect... if she wouldn't know him so well. He tsked at his missed hit and reached for another book. She quickly leaned forward and grabbed his hand. He gave her a questioning look.

"How about our... after class activities?" she whispered out of blue. She just remembered why she dashed to search for him in the break. Not to whine about her grades but for something else.

He looked at her, then sighed. "That's almost sexual harassment, China..."

Her eyes went wide open in realization. "After class activities" ?! Why "after class activities"...?! She flushed. ...activities... Her stomach twisted painfully when she remembered the last part of her dream. Her face was suddenly set on fire and she was almost sure that she saw smoke exiting her ears.

"What about them? Or it...?" She could hear him asking.

"N-no-nothing...!" She shuttered as her eyes started to spin.

Oi, wasn't spiral eyes Tsukki's trade-mark? Why is she having them?! Not to say she already have spiral glasses... There are enough spirals in her character, she's not in need when it comes to spirals! Really!

"Oi, China..."

Where is the tab? I need cold water... I really need cold wateeer!... Why was her brain replaying that scene?! With all that teasing, their fake kissing attempt, the fall in the hammock and with her on top of him... and her crushing her lips with his. And him responding to it, brushing his lips against hers hungrily. And her moaning. And him starting to touch every part of her body which heated her up even more...

BANG! A textbook hit her head. Hard.

A vein popped on her forehead. She picked up the textbook and...

"KORRRAA!"

...jumped at her rival.

"That's exactly what I was talking about!" Gin-chan shouted. They both stopped in their tracks; Kagura with her punch hanging in the air and Sougo pulling her bangs.

"You were talking, Gin-chan?" She asked innocently.

Innocence which annoyed the man even more...

"That!" He pointed at the two, who were watching him with dead-fish eyes, respectively deadpanned. "That's the behavior that makes this class the worse nightmare for a teacher!"

"... other than you, Danna." Sougo deadpanned and the class nodded in unison.

Ginpachi waved nonchalantly. "Ah, that doesn't matter, Souchirou-kun."

"Sougo, Danna."

As always, the man ignored him, but pointed at them in indignation. "And why are you two sitting on the same chair? Don't you have a seat, Kagura-chan?!"

Kagura, who was sharing a seat with her rival, looked at Gin-chan like it was the most natural thing to do and answered. "B-but I want to be close... so I can take my revenge, yes."

"Same on my part." Sougo deadpanned as he pushed her away a little, to make himself some place. She pushed back. The chair's leg was made from iron, so it was cold. You don't make a lady sit on a cold bar!

"Keep your friends close but your enemies closer." Ginpachi sighed. They were purely hopeless.

"Umm, sensei?" Kondou rose a hand. "Why did you waited for us...?" He asked warily the question that was hanging in the class from the beginning. They all wanted to know the answer for that.

Ginpachi eyes shot wide open in realization. The class went shift. Here it comes...! they all thought.

Silence.

The teacher frowned, not knowing how to put the matter. "Alright, I know you all want better marks but... was it really necessary to write that wish down?! Is not even New Year's Eve (17)! Wait for New Year's Eve at least, you spoiled brats!"

Silence.

"That's... all...?" Katsura asked, not sure how to react. They were all so tensed up!

Ginpachi blinked. "Ha? Yeah, that's all I wanted to say." He said and used his pinky to dig for a snot.

The whole class sighed in unison. They were holding their breaths, it seems.

"It's a relief that's all, Ginpachi-san, you scared us for good." Otae voiced out her classmates thought.

"I know, I know." He nodded with them.

Huh...?

"You too, Sakata-sensei...?" Kondou asked confused.

"Yeah, your psycho teacher scared the hell out of me. He came rushing at me in the break and threatened that, if I don't talk some sense into you, he'll quit this class and report me to principal Baka(18). He had even spied me the whole break to make sure I talk with you. What a nuisance." He frowned at the unpleasant memory.

The class sweat dropped. So, that's why he waited for us...

"I hope you got my message." He said as he wiped his finger on the table. "No more wishes 'till New Year's Eve." He took a Jump from a drawer and made himself comfortable at the desk. "Class dismissed." he mumbled, though there were still fifteen minutes of the hour left.

The class just went back at creating chaos, with Kondou giving the start by throwing himself at Otae. Nothing fancy, just usual destruction.

Kagura rolled her eyes. She didn't feel like fighting...

...with Zura, Shinpachi, Madao or any other poor soul that was flying in the classroom. Because Sadist was nowhere to be found. Just where was her personal training dummy (19)? Oh, well, doesn't matter. Let's just eat his lunch! She started to rummage enthusiastically in his things, searching for a certain magical and wonderful box. And she searched... And she searched...

Just where was that box?

She made a total mess out of his... let's say desk, because, even though the content of his bag was scattered all over his desk, she didn't touch his coat or his shoes, so didn't technically make a mess out of all of his things! Just out of a part of them...

But, anyway, mess or not, the equation simple:

(Sadist was gone) + (His lunch box was missing too) = (He took his bento with him...)

"That bastard...!" She roared her frustration. Running away by himself was a thing about she couldn't care less. But running away with food? Now that was personal!

She used the chaos in her advantage and sneaked out of the classroom. If she wanted to find him, she knew where to search. After all, the whole charade started in that place. The fact that it turned into something serious was something else...

She shook her head and started to run.

It didn't take her long to find him. He was exactly where he shouldn't be. So much for a student council member, using his authority fully in his favor. That or his reputation of a super sadist. Or both of them. Combined.

He rose the edge of his eye-mask when he heard the door closing with a bang, but let it back down the moment he saw it was just her.

"Running away with the food is a crime against humanity, you know?"

He lazily took off his eye-mask. "You found me quite fast. Seems like, if you ever get lost, all I have to do is to put a shrimp on a hook and we'll fish you in no time."

She opened and closed her mouth like a fish, thinking of a good come-back.

"See?" he chuckled. She made a potty face, but eyed the box from his left.

"If you want, we can share..." She smiled brightly at his words and took a seat next to him. "... but we have only a pair of chopsticks..."

Kagura's face instantly flushed red. "N-n-never mind..." She uttered as she pushed herself away with an impressive speed, her destination being the opposite corner.

He frowned at her, then got up and walked toward her. She scrunched down in embarrassment, praying she'll disappear before he'll reach her. Or at least tried to calm her heart beating, but her mind was playing with her by portraying... strange things.

He knelt in front of her and looked at her curiously. She panicked and turned her head away as her face colored even more. She could feel her ears burning.

He brought his face closer. "What's with you? You're blushing a lot lately..." he asked tentatively. She didn't response. He smirked and grabbed one of her side bangs. "Not that I mind." he teased as he twirled it around his finger with ease.

"I had a... weird dream, okay?!" she moaned.

It took her a second to realize her mistake.

"About...?"

At this, she kept quiet.

He sighed and decided to just go for it. "So, how did it started? Did you ate something rotten?"

"Of course not!"

She's lively, that's good.

"It all started from that "X" though." she pondered.

"XXX? You were watching porn, China?"

She blushed again. "No! The X from the geography book's cover!"

"Ah, editors these days." Ginpachi sighed as he shook his head. "They wanna make the geography books look more attractive and it end up making kids thinking of porn."

"Not porn, pirates, yes!" Kagura exclaimed fiercely as she clenched her fists.

Huh...? they both looked at each other. Something felt off...

"You aren't allowed on the rooftop." The teacher deadpanned at their puzzled stares.

---

Kagura sighed tiredly. Today sure had been an eventful day...

"What's with you lately? So depressed... you're annoying." The boy next to her said just as heartless as ever. She rolled her eyes.

"I'm not depressed, just tired, okay?" She sighed at her own pathetical tone. She sounded so desperate...

To her surprise, he sighed too. "Yeah , to be honest, so do I. Can't wait to get home..."

She frowned. Get home... wait a minute!

"Sadist!" She suddenly exclaimed as she finally realized what bothered her all this day.

He groaned. "What? And stop yellin-"

"I need you to come to my place tonight!" She said, ignoring his protests completely.

He looked at her with both wariness and surprise. "Tonight...?"

She gasped at her own mistake. "I-I mean "today"!"

He gave her his best deadpanned face. "No."

"Please! Pretty, pretty please! "

"Why?"

"Because tomorrow I want to spend the whole day with Anego and Kyuubei!"

This China girl... she wasn't making sense at all...

"So? Go and spend it..."

"But I can't! Because tomorrow you come to tutor me!" She gesticulated in the air energetically as she explained the situation.

"And since when do I have that kind of program?"

"Well, we talked about it..." she scolded him for not listening to her... 'till she realized that she was wrong. "Actually, we didn't... but that doesn't matter, yes!"

He sighed at her logic. "But why Thursday and Tuesday...? Why not Thursday and Wednesday?"

"Because I need a day off. I don't think I can survive staying with you almost two full days in a row..." she responded and shivered at the thought.

"Ouch!" Sougo grimaced. "You hurt a student council member's feelings. You can get detention for that, you know..." he smirked.

"Stop making use of your authority! Even with the roof top...!" She said, peeved by his careless attitude. Not that she wouldn't do the same if she would be in his place... "Because of you we got scolded by Gin-chan!"

"He just told us to go and play somewhere else then said something about Jump getting out in Saturday this week and about the school's magazine not selling strawberry milk anymore..."

She just nodded in response. "That's Gin-chan for you!" He didn't respond.

It took her five minutes to realize that they were walking in silence.

And that he didn't answer her at all...

She looked at him meaningful. "So...?" She asked unsure. Heck, all this conversation had an unsure and confused aura!

Seems like her question broke his trail of thoughts because he looked quite surprised by the fact that she called him. He frowned and pondered. She blinked impatient. She really didn't like to wait. And neither the fact that waiting for his reply made her nervous. He'll say no anyway, why to make her wait?

"Hmm... sure, why not."

"I knew you'll refuse..." she said bitterly. Then her eyes went wide open. "Wait... wha... Really?"

"Yeah... I have plans tomorrow, so better get rid of a nuisance as fast as possible."

She was too amazed to hear the mock.

"Really...? Thanks, Sadist! Then, to my place!" She cheered as she started to run.

"Isn't that the place were heading to?" he asked with a neutral tone.

She stopped in her tracks. "Eh...? W-what do you mean...?"

"That's why you wanted to take a new route today." He shook his head as he tsked. "Trying to lure me, China... it's not gonna work. I had patrolled those streets voluntarily, so I know every little crook and corner."

She sweat dropped. "I see..." But he still accepted... She sighed, Sadist sure was complicated... "Then why did you accepted...?"

"It's always better to play into a criminal hands than to refuse her. Because she will think you are vulnerable..."

"I'm not a criminal!"

"Trying to lure me in dark and unknown streets? Sounds like rape to me..."

"...Or trying to make you accept the program I made!" She completed, doing her best to ignore the wild images that were playing in her head.

"And if I didn't accept, what would you did?" he hummed in an ironic way. "What were the plan B? Rape?"

"No!" Kagura jumped. "Beat the shit out of you!"

"How kind of you." he commented sarcastically.

She just grimaced at his reply and they continued to walk silently 'till they got to their destination.

It was only when she took out her key and unlocked the door that she started to feel like she forgot something important. But she wasn't sure what, so she decided to ignore the feeling and went inside.

"I'm home!" she shouted as she closed the door.

"Sorry to bother you." He mumbled as he got in.

They started to take off their shoes silently. Both were lost in their own thoughts; Sougo asking himself what he should do next and Kagura asking herself what will they have for dinner. Most probably some convenience food Gin-chan's gonna buy.

She sighed. Too bad Sadist wouldn't stay for dinner. Maybe I should ask him to teach me to-

Wait... Teach... her?

Her eyes flung open when realization hit her. That was what she forgot!...

Oh boy...

"Sadist, do you... m-mind waiting here a little?" she asked impatiently as her brain send alarms signals all over. She seriously didn't know what to do if he refused.

Silence.

She gulped imperceptibly and looked up at him. Say something! Anything! ... but not "yes"! Don't you dare to say "yes", yes!

He opened his mouth to most probably tell her off with one of his sarcastic reply, but then something flinched in his eyes for a mere second and he just closed it as his expression changed from sarcasm to deadpan.

"Then I'll take the kitchen, if you don't mind." He picked his bag and headed to the said place, not waiting for her reply.

Not that she needed him to.

She tossed off her shoes in a rush, then made a ran to her room. She assaulted her desk, forcing open every drawer she saw and rummaging after a certain book.

She nearly tore it apart when she took it out. She cursed under her breath, then started to flip through it furiously as a certain tiny piece of dialog replayed in her mind over and over again.

"Don't forget to read your notes before you go to sleep."

"I hope you'll dream of zombies Mayora eating your brain."'

Don't forget to read your notes before you go to sleep.

And, of course, that's exactly what she forgot to!

She ran her eyes over the pages in her flipping, not searching for a lesson but desperately trying to get was it was universally about. Of course, history, but what exactly? What was that chapter all about? What was she supposed to learn? Or more exactly, what should she have learned?

She groaned when that avalanche of questions filled her mind with the speed of a tsunami. God, she couldn't get it! First of all she didn't have the tiniest idea what the lesson was about...

...or which the lesson was.

She threw away the book, sighing.

She bent her head back and stared at the ceiling with lifeless eyes. There was no hope for her.

"Sadist will kill me... no, he'll first torture me to his heart content, then simply let me die in my own misery... most probably watching my useless struggling to survive closely. Because he is a sadist..." she mumbled to herself, like she just realized there wasn't anything to do to save her own skin, so she ended up accepting her own fate.

She tried to stop her own grim thoughts, but it was no use. She looked at the book cheerlessly, then suddenly picked up the rest of her moral and shot a fierce glare at that pile of sewn papers. If she had to endure torture for her careless actions, then fine! But she'll fight to the bitter end!

With a war cry, Kagura's fight for the sake of her pride began.

---

It haven't taken her long... or at least that's what she thinks. She fought with all her best, but that mean a lot of energy lose, hence getting tired. So, with those premises, what she did was normal and correct on her part!

But the judge didn't think the same way...

SLAP!

A sound and a sudden pressure on her head, which vanished the moment it appeared. Then, in the next millisecond, she felt pain.

She opened her eyes in time, exactly when he wanted to strike again. His arm in the air, holding a rolled textbook in his hand while he looked down at her with his classical bored countenance.

"Sadist, were you hitting me?"

"No."

A vein popped on her forehead. "You did, yes!"

"Oh, I did?" he asked innocently. "Maybe I was hitting on you, but not hitting you."

"You weren't hitting on me! You don't hit on somebody with a rolled newspaper! That's how you hit on a fly, you bastard!"

"First: that's how you hit a fly. And second: you're a fly."

"I'm not a fly!" She threw the history book at him but without luck, because it didn't hit him. "And that's not how people do it!"

"True. That's how I do it."

She made a sour face and mumbled something about him being a bastard and a total sadist as she groped for her book. Strange, nowhere to be found. She even looked under the sheets. Nothing.

She looked everywhere. The book vanished.

"That's what you're searching so desperately?" He asked, holding the book to her. "Maybe you should remember what you aim toward somebody..."

She snatched her book from his hands and started to flip its pages, fully concentrated.

Sougo sighed and delivered another hit with his textbook. "You don't even know which is the lesson, do you?"

"Of course I know!" she defended herself.

"Which?"

"The one with Pearl Harbor!"

He shook his head. "Nope. That's in the second World Wide War. We're still in the Nara period, China" He took the book from her hand, flipped it then gave it back to her. "On the beginning" he emphasized. "not at the end of the book."

"Oh..."

He sighed again and placed on the table the box he was holding. He threw himself on the bed. "Then, shall we start?"

She nodded slightly then waited.

Nothing happened.

Puzzled, she warily drew her book closer and started to read the lesson. Just so she would have something to busy herself. It wasn't like she should have already knew it...

Alright, there something wrong here. she concluded and stole a glance over her opened book. He was staying there, meditating so concentrated that even if she stared straight into his eyes, he wouldn't observe her at all. Maybe he was daydreaming...

...or maybe not. And knowing Sadist, it was the last.

She blinked confused. "Sa...dist...?"

It seems like her call brought him back to earth because he flinched and looked at her questioning.

"Umm, what you doing...? Aren't you supposed to tutor me? Start already!"

He smirked. She was losing her patience, wasn't she?

"I was asking myself if I should see what you learned yesterday first. Before using that..."

Kagura frowned. "That...?" At his mysterious silence, she added, trying to get at least a clue from him. "So? It's necessary to, or not?"

"Do you know something from that lesson?"

"No." she responded bluntly.

He sighed. "Then we-"

"Do you really think I'm an idiot?" She asked as she crossed her arms over her chest and puffed her cheeks. "Of course I know something! What do you think I did all this f**king time?"

"F**ked?"

"KORRAAA!" She tried to punch his rotten face, but of course that he dodged it. Honestly, she could bet that dodging was a hobby of sort for him. She retracted her punch back and looked warily at him. "What now?"

At her question, he got up and reached for the package he brought when he came.

She sniffed. She could feel a certain smell coming from the package. What was in it? And why was it smelling so good? Damn it, she was curious!

She eyed him suspiciously as he reached his hands to open it... Alright, she couldn't take it anymore!

She suddenly snatched the lid out of his hands and greedily glanced inside. She gasped as her eyes widened in excitement and genuine surprise.

Cooked vinegared rice which wrapped around different ingredients, seafood, vegetables and tropical fruits. She gazed mesmerized. There was also brown rice, something she particularly wanted to try since a long time...

Or in other words: sushi.

He made sushi.

Sushi.

"Now, now, China. Stay still. Stay still..." He rose his hands in defense, like he would do if he met an aggressive dog.

A very aggressive dog.

"Do I get some...?" She asked innocently. ...or do I have to take it myself?

He nodded, then directed to the book. "Repeat the lesson while I prepare the dish."

Kagura grinned widely. "Roger, sir!" She cheered and literally stuck her nose into the book.

He rolled his eyes at her. China exaggerated as always... oh, well, he had work to do.

He took out a small wooden platter and poured the soy sauce into it. Then he pondered. Even if he brought another platter, he decided to let the food in the box. After all they weren't in the kitchen...

"Finished. Now let's-"

"ITADAKIMASUU!" She suddenly leaped toward the box, but he took it away in time.

"Nope, not gonna happen." he dead-panned as he held the box in the air.

She eyed him, then pursed her lips in dissatisfaction, like the fox who didn't reach the grapes and was telling herself that they were sour anyway.

Only that this certain fox wasn't the type to give up.

"But you said...!" How dare he take away the food from her?! How dare he?!

He shook his head. "I said you're gonna eat it." he paused and smirked. "But I didn't tell you the conditions."

She blinked confused. Conditions?

Reading her bewilderment on her face, he made things clear. "It's a reward. If you answer three question right, you get a roll. Based on the difficulty of the question, you'll get different rolls. Directly proportional." he stopped. "Questions?"

She shook her head as he tummy twisted uneasily. Why did she had a bad feeling about this? Damn him and those game of his!

"So, question number one..."

She tensed.

"When did the Taika reform occurred?"

She blinked. Huh...? That's in the Asuka period. She told him her thoughts warily.

"At the end." he corrected. "And it doesn't matter. It's important."

If you say so... Well, she had to admit it. It was true, after all. She may not be good at memorizing the years, but she could remember the facts pretty well. After all that reform left its mark on the Japanese culture. A good mark even, so of course it was important.

"625."

He looked at her with dead-fish eyes.

"What?" Kagura asked offended as she counted her good answers. She has one. Only two more to go...

"645."

"Huh?"

"That's the correct answer; 645."

What...? "But...!"

He flipped the page of the textbook, ignoring her protests. "Don't listen to Yuuji (20). Yuuji is a tactician so luring his opponents is his job."

"What a horrible bastard..." she mumbled sourly.

He rose his shoulder indifferently and spinner them because his back started to ache. "Moving on. What happened in the Nara period?"

"A lot of things..." she answered warily.

He rolled his eyes. "What exactly? What was the Nara period all about."

Her eyes sparkled for a mere second. "The nobles borrowed some of the Chinese culture like the fashion, the Buddhism cult... oh, and its the time when kanji appeared." She said matter-of-factly.

"Its the historical period when the Chinese characters were adopted. Not the time they appeared because their not pubic hair."

"Whatever." She grimaced. Scolding seemed to be his hobby. He sure had a lot of hobbies... "But my answer is correct, right?"

He nodded slightly. She mimicked a cheerful "yes!". Two more to go...

Then he "fired" another question at her. She got it wrong. Her mood went a little gloomy...

Another question. This time the victory was hers.

Other one. 3-2 for Sadist...

"What happened in 710?"

She smiled. "Kojiki and Nihon Shoki were written. (21)"

"Nope. That's in 712… and Nihon Shoki is in 720." he dead-panned. "The capital was moved from Fujiwara-kyo to Heiji-kyo – that's what happened in 710."

Umm... did she tell you that she wasn't good with the years? She gritted her teeth. Damn it, another step away from the Heaven Gates of Tastes...!

Add another one, as she got the wrong answer at the following one...

She closed her eyes and rubbed her eyebrows in a troubled manner, beating her brains about what to do to get to the food. Only one more right answer. That's all she needed. But how to get it? She pondered thoughtfully. If she said yes at the all questions he'll put her, maybe she'll get one of them right. Or – who knows – a bonus point for persistence?

"Give me your hands."

She complied absent-minded. Why couldn't he shut up a little so that she could think? She needed a plan...

Her eyes flung wide open when something grabbed her wrists and pushed her down, her back leaning on the pillow. She blinked confused. If Sadist pinned her down, why was she staring at her room's ceiling? Just what was he planning...?

She yelped when he started to kiss her neck out of blue. Her eyes widened at the familiar feeling and her stomach twisted in anticipation. Not that! Anything but not that! She started to squirm violently, trying to free herself and she would have succeeded if he didn't start to use his tongue.

She gasped, then bit her lip at the feeling of something warm and wet running over her skin. It was a feeling she knew really well. Maybe too well for her own good. Her face grew hotter as she became painful aware of how warm his lips were.

He went down for her collarbone, carefully tracing its line, kissing and occasionally licking. She closed her eyes again, trying to calm herself. Alright, he may have a strong grip on her, but the least she could do was to remain as neutral as possible. Because she wasn't going to give him the satisfaction that he made her moan.

Then suddenly, he stopped... on one of her jugular veins. He found her pulse and was now keeping his mouth on it, feeling her regular heartbeat. And as if to betray her more, her heart started to beat faster.

He smirked at her reaction, his lips curling on her skin as his breath softened. She giggled involuntarily. His soft breath was ticklish and warm, like the other time. She started to protest again, weakly moving her limbs to get him off her. His grip on her hands tightened.

"Just when I thought you started to enjoy it..." he mumbled in her neck, making her chuckle at the vibration. "...but then again, you weren't supposed to enjoy it anyway..." he moved his head, his lips brushing past her skin, tickling her.

Kagura tried to digest the information... but it was pretty hard to concentrate with a sadist at your neck! "not supposed to enjoy it?" What does he meant by that? She didn't like what it implied, so she tried again to kick him off. She gasped when he nipped her skin gently.

Then he bit on it and she went limp again as her face flushed another shape of red.

Soft moans escaped her mouth as he nipped, licked, bit, sucked and licked again at her neck. He had no mercy in his actions now that she finally stopped protesting.

Why did she have a feeling of déjà vu?

After a few minutes full of sucking at her skin, he moved his head away, let go of her wrist and examined his handy work. Good, she was expecting that.

In an instant, she rose her foot and aimed a kick for his head.

But he caught it like he was expecting it too.

She supported herself on her elbows to maintain eye contact with him. Her blush started to slowly wash away "Why aren't you letting me hit your useless head?"

"Because don't want a red mark on my face."

"Oh, c'mon Sadist, let me fulfill the déjà vu feeling!" she complained in response.

To her disappoint, he shook his head. "Nope, because it's all your fault that you got red marks on her neck."

That confused her greatly. "How comes that?" Was he implying that she made them herself? With what? The vacuum cleaner? Who was she? Tomoko? (22)

He made a duh-its-obvious face and crossed his arms over his chest. Then he blinked. "Oh, it seems like I forgot to tell you."

Obviously.

"At five wrong answers, I'll let a kiss mark on your neck. So if you decided to get thirty questions wrong, you'll have three bloody marks." he dead-panned.

"'You forgot that deliberately!'" Kagura shouted and pointed at him scandalized.

Sadist smirked. "Did I now?"

She glared. "You did, yes. "She frowned. "And your math is wrong. I should have six marks..."

"Oh, so now you know to do math?" Sougo

asked sarcastically. "And no, it's not. You'll see." he smirked.

Kagura shrugged. That smirk was no good omen...

The following scene was simply suspicious. He "fired" another set of question out of blue, correcting her (wrong) answers in a rush. It took her a lot to recompose herself. Why was he in such a hurry? She dismissed the thought with a hand gesture. It wasn't her business though she was curious.

She indifferently counted the questions on her fingers. And her face grew pale. 6 questions... 1 right answer... that means 5 wrong answers. Oh... She gulped. So that's why...

Kagura took a deep breath and closed her eyes, calmly waiting for the assault. Who knows, maybe she'll save her energy and just go with the flow... She rose her shoulders at the thought and waited.

And waited...

She heard a certain sound. Of wood being crushed or more exactly of...

She flung open her eyes and there she saw him, ready to eat.

... or of chopsticks being separated!

"What are you doing?" she asked warily. The sushi was and is her recompense. Just what did he have in that wicked mind of his?

He looked at her questioningly.

"Weren't you supposed to..." she stopped and pointed at her neck awkwardly as she flushed a soft pink.

"No, I wasn't." he smirked.

Thanks Goodness!

"Forgot to tell you but after ten wrong answers, a roll goes away." He dead-panned and pointed at the box.

Say what?!

"B-but-"

"And how much questions did you got wrong?" he asked with his chopsticks in mid-air.

She averted her eyes embarrassed. "T-ten..."

"Well then I shall eat." The sadist paused to look at her. "If you don't mind." he added ironically and glued his hands together.

She minded! A lot even. Kagura bit her lip troubled. F*ck you and your mental games! Just f*ck you. Simply f*ck you! She cursed in her mind, summoning all the profanities and foul words she knew as anger took over her confusion.

She watched hungrily how he directed his utensils to the box that was supposed to be hers and hers alone. He picked a tuna roll and brought it tormentingly slow to his mouth. He stopped and for a mere second she thought he'll give it to her. Then the roll flew in his mouth.

Profanities and curses filled her mind as she watched, just watched how her food was eaten. And not by her! She chanted his trademark mantra against Mayora, changing the mayo-freak's name with his. Her stomach growled. It's funny how you suddenly get hungry if someone eats next to you...

She tried to avert her gaze. With every move of his chin she felt like someone pulled her insides out and threw them in a gristmill, letting her watch how they grotesquely got crushed, splashing blood all over.

Her stomach growled again.

Damn it, not even horror images could take her mind away from food. And the Sadist kept on chewing on her food. Ignore it, ignore it, ignore it... her mantra changed, it seems.

He stopped from chewing and swallowed his bite very satisfied. She bit her lower lips harder when he lifted the other half of the roll. Her stomach growled again, this time painfully. He put the piece in between his teeth. She watched how it disappeared…

And she couldn't take it anymore.

She launched herself at him, like a Shinpachi toward Otsuu's CD and violently crushed their mouths together. He gasped in surprise at the sudden impact, action that gave her a perfect opportunity to stick her tongue inside his mouth and grasp the other half before it disappeared forever. She dragged it back in its rightful place; her mouth, then her tongue brushed past something.

Her eyes widened and she brought the thing in her mouth. Rice. There was some rice in his. Her grip on his shoulders tightened as her tongue swirled in his mouth, hunting every little grain of rice.

Sougo shifted beneath her. Her tongue wandered inside his mouth, taking every grain it founded. There was so much rice inside. She slid her tongue in the place between his cheek and teeth and fished some half-chewed grains. So much, so much rice. She could even taste it.

After cleaning his mouth of grains, she retracted her tongue and took back her place, chewing on the food with a happy face. It tasted so good! As expected from Sadist...

She opened her eyes and looked at him innocently as she chewed. She couldn't read his face, though she could see his eyes gleaming in a strange way.

He glared at her. She looked straight into his eyes, her concern could be read in her innocent gaze. She swallowed, then shyly brought herself closer to him.

"Sadist...?" she asked softly.

Without a warn, he grabbed her shoulders tightly and unceremoniously crushed their lips together again.

"W-wait... I don't h...ave any...more r-" Kagura mumbled in his mouth, her muffled words slowly losing their context as his lips fully caught hers.

She closed her eyes, trying to slow her breath as the warmth of her own face made her feel dizzy. Her stomach twisted when he slid his tongue past her lips and started to rub it against hers, swirling both of them, making her "dance the way he singed".

It took her a little to realize that a few minutes back she completely forgot about him. Or who she was kissing... or that she was kissing someone... She blushed and squeezed her eyes shut. But compared to that moment, now she was fully aware. She slowly relaxed her shoulders and moved her tongue in the opposite direction of his.

The moment he felt her relaxing, his grip on her arms eased and he wrapped his arms around her body, pulling her closer to him. She could feel their chests touching lightly as a nice warmness speared in her whole body. She wrapped her arms around his neck, making herself more comfortable as their tongue swirled around each other, both of them participating.

Then he suddenly pulled out. Ending the kiss. She moaned unhappily and slowly opened her eyes, her arms still around his neck.

"D-don't tease me, Sadist..." she breathed harshly, her need of air being so obvious.

"And why should I not?" he asked rhetorically in a subtle mocking tone.

Kagura closed her eyes. Of course he'd be angry... Heck, she would be more than angry at him if he did what she did. Now that she thought about it, he was taking it better than she would.

The girl unwillingly unclasped her arms from his neck. She shrugged, she already felt cold... she made a sour face then she began to pull herself out of his warm hug.

His grip tightened around her body protestingly, pulling her back to her place. She rose her eyes and shot him a questioning look. Not that she minded his gesture; she liked their proximity anyway.

"Who said you can run away?" He leaned her head against her chest.

Kagura grinned from ear to ear. "Why don't you just admit that you can't stay away from me?"

"Shut up and stop ruining the mood." he said and started to ruffle her hair, his fingers softly digging in it. A warm feeling spread in her whole body at the touch. She closed back her eyes, graceful for that random moment of serenity and tenderness.

Then her stomach growled.

She flinched, then blushed. Seriously now, nothing could take her subconscious away from food? Well, that's what happens if you go against your character...

Sougo puffed on the top of her head. Irony after irony, it seems.

"You're that hungry, China?"

"That's what happens if an idiot eats in front of me!"

He tugged at her hair softly. "Now, now, I wouldn't call myself an idiot. After all, I'm the one tutoring here..."

She snatched herself out of their hug, pushing her hands against his chest for support to look him in the eyes. "Stop blackmailing!"

"Shall we eat, then?"

She blinked, purely confused. "Huh?" Her ears didn't betrayed her, right? And neither did her hunger took over her hearing right? Right?

"You mean eat, like in: put food in our mouths, chew it – if we want – and swallow it to get it in our stomach?" she asked warily. What trap did he set now? What was his game?

"Yeah."

She frowned. "Not the other meaning?"

"There's no other meaning."

She ignored him. "No trap?"

"No."

"No play of words?"

"Nope."

"We? You mean together?"

"Yeah."

"And no touching?"

"No."

"No other wicked games of yours?"

"Now, now you're hurting me." She gazed at him intently. He sighed. "No, no other trap. You have a free way."

She smiled, then asked suspiciously. "And I can chew my own food?"

He rolled his eyes. "No, you can't…" She blushed a soft red which brought a smirk on his lips. "…you'll have to. I had enough of your mouth."

A big, genuine smile formed on her lips. The Heaven Gate of tastes just opened!

---

By the end of the day Kagura had five dark-red marks on and around her collarbone. But the box was empty and the sushi was now getting digested by her tummy. So her tummy was happy.

So Kagura couldn't care less about the marks.

Sougo yawned and scratched his arms in the air. China was really something. To get so hypnotized by food that to not feel him at all. It angered and confused him at the same time.

Though he made her pay, that's for sure. He smirked, her flushed face playing in the back of his head with eyes half closed and heavy breathing, doing her to calm her heart beats though she failed epically. Multiply that with five. Oh, well flustered and embarrassed somehow fitted her, in his opinion. It be a rare sight but still...

"Woooah...!" she slapped close the book and threw herself on her back, exhausted.

"Is the mental effort too much for you to take, China?" He asked, a little amused. After all, she could aim punches and kicks (at him) all day long... sure with breakfast, lunch, snack time, dinner and snack time again breaks and be only a little tired.

Be made a pile out of his book and threw them inside his bag. She got up and sleepily headed toward her desk to look at the clock. He closed the box where had been the sushi. Ugh, he'll have to wash it at home... He pushed the box it a dark corner. She eats, she washes. Gourmands should wash their dishes and so should China monsters. The physical effort wouldn't kill her anyway.

"Oi, Sadist, hurry up! It's almost past my sleeping hour. I don't want to stay up late because you had been lazy!"

"It's not like the last weekend you stood awake all night long for a Ghibli-movies marathon anyway." another sarcastic voice they knew very well spoke.

She immediately jumped on her feet and ran to him. She nearly knocked him off his feet as she hugged him tightly.

"Gin-chan!" she shouted as she nuzzled his chest like a cat or a happy child. "You're back!"

Sougo's expression darkened.

The older man looked down at the top of her head with his usual dead-fish eyes. "Yeah, yeah, I'm back." he ruffled her hair, trying to pull her away as gently as possible.

Sougo's expression darkened so much that his bangs covered his eyes.

She smiled up to the man innocently. He tried to unglue the girl away from his chest. "Oi, Kagura-chan, let go of me. Souchirou-kun's making some very funny faces... and I don't think he's playing theatre!"

She didn't bother.

Ginpachi panicked as the girl's grip tightened. And the boy's aura darkened. "K-K-Kagura-chan! Stop hugging me... Souchirou-kun scares meee!"

She buried her face deeply into his chest. Ginpachi started to sweat. "Seriously, Kagura-ch-"

She looked up at him, dead-fish eyed. "Did you buy my sukonbu?" she asked bluntly.

"Huh?" His life was in danger and all she cared was her damn seaweed?! Then he finally realized what she was doing.

"Yeah, yeah. I bought your weed. Though it doesn't matter that I had to fight a avalanche (of angry people) to get back home safe." he whined as he stuck his hand inside his pocket. He took out a little packet and hit the girl's forehead with it. "Now stop using your yandere boyfriend against me."

The said yandere got up. "It's Sougo, Danna. And I'm not a yandere." he paused. "Not for China, at least."

"Exactly, Gin-chan! Sadist is not an yandere, but a fully acknowledged siscon!" Kagura exclaimed.

"Whatever." Ginpachi sighed. "Then go and accompany this siscon-yandere-haraguro-tsundere to the door." he said and picked a random magazine from the floor, hoping it was Jump.

"Sure! Let's go, Sadist! I want to buy something after." Without waiting for his reply, she grabbed his hand and dragged him out of the room, full of enthusiasm.

They stormed out of the apartment running, with China dragging him after her, headed down the stairs, then out of the block.

The moment her skin made contact with the cold air, she started to shiver. Inside the stairway was warmer than outside. "Wait here a little, Sadist!" she demanded and sprinted back inside.

Sougo rolled his eyes. "Careful to not forget your head." he shouted after her when the door closed behind her with a bang. Sougo shrugged and dug in his bag after his scarf. It may be spring but that didn't matter. The nights are still cold and dark. After all, spring just began...

"Umm, excuse me. I'm sorry to bother you but do you know where is Yorozuya Gin-chan?" He heard a faint, sweet voice asking a passerby. "Oh, you don't know what I'm talking about..." the voice sounded sorry, panicked even. "Then do you know where is this street?" the voice came back with a new wave of hope.

Sougo found his scarf and wrapped it around his neck.

"Thank you very much!" the voice almost cheered. And it seems that it was getting closer. Sougo froze, his hands gripping the scarf, his eyes wide open.

Closer. Closer enough for him to recognize it.

He knew the voice…

"Fuck...!"

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(1) Master Roshi – Dragon Ball

(2) Mishima Chika – May not "Miss Pervert" Fall in Love (and my personal favorite hentai manga)

(3) Jiraiya – you know him from Naruto

(4) Yamada – a girl who's controversial by a certain part of her body. Also the main character of Yamada B Gata H Kei

(5) Muttsurrini – the "ninja" from Baka to Test to Shoukanjuu

(6) Konata Izumi – Lucky Star!

(7) Ryosuke Haga – the main pervert of Dakara Boku wa H ga dekinai

(8) Haruhi Suzumiya – Haruhi Suzumiya no Yuutsu

(9) Imadori Kyousuke – my personal favorite pervert from School Rumble

(10) Ekaterina "Katja" Kurae – Yes she is what Sougo said. If you don't believe, search Seikon no Quaser

(11) Barney Stinson – Got to love this guy. No seriously. Well, got to love the whole How I met your mother cast…

(12) Hoist the colours, the soundtrack of Pirates of the Caribbean

(13) a wreath of forget-me-not, with a few sakura flowers around her head. Forget-me-not means "true love" and sakura means "kind and gentle" in the Japanese flower symbol. Just so you know.\

(14) Reference to Temee! You can blame math but you can't calculate your life! For those who didn't know…

(15) both him and the girl from his right. Kagura seats next to Sougo. Remember that part at the end of episode 5 where Sougo whines that she's flashing her wiener at him? Yep, that one.

(16) a furoshiki is the piece of cloth that is wrapped around the bento box. It is used to transport things.

(17) Is not even New Year's Eve! – in the New Year's period some Japanese go to Shinto shrines Hatsumoude to celebrate. They also make wishes.

(18) principal Baka – in the light novel Hata is the principal, not Otose. I'll stick to the novel, if you don't mind.

(19) a training dummy – it can be both the human shaped thing that was used in medieval sword fighting, or that she called him dummy. Your choice.

(20) Another Baka to Test reference. This guy, Yuuji relied in a battle-test on the fact that she told to a certain girl this wrong information (that the Taika reform was in 625).

(21) Kojiki and Nihon Shoki were written. – collections of tales. Kojiki is the oldest – and I'll quote Wikipedia – "extant chronicle in Japan". Those two are the base of the Shinto cult and they tell the story of Japan's birth and its Gods (Kami).

(22) The vacuüm cleaner? Who was she? Tomoko? – in one of the episodes of Watashi ga Motenai no wa dou Kangaetemo Omaera ga Warui Tomoko used the vacuüm cleaner on… herself.

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I really hope you got something from my shitty explanations. I really hope…

Also, please tell me if you want me to translate the Japanese words I use. Though I personally believe you would learn them better if you search them on Google.

Also, if I made a wrong cultural reference or the information is wrong, then please do tell. I'm here to learn!

See you next time!

…'till death do us apart, buhuhu! XD