Chapter IV

"Guys?"

The ninja flashed her two rows of immaculate white teeth sweetly when all three men joined her at the entrance. However, none of them made a step towards her. Barret raised a single brow and gave the girl a weird look before nudging Cloud and Cid. Cloud shrugged his shoulders and mouthed, "What do you want me to do?" but made sure that his words did not fall upon Yuffie's ear. Cid ducked behind Cloud's spikes and Barret's bulky shoulders, reluctant and somewhat frightened to move anywhere the thief. He clutched the pack of cigarettes in his breast pocket tightly. It was his last pack and God forbid Yuffie steals it to lecture him on the dangers of cancer.

When she saw that none of the men budged or even responded to her greeting, her smiled instantly dissolved and was replaced with a frown that covered her clenching teeth. "Geez. What's wrong with you people? Look, I know I'm dazzling and all, but you don't need to stand there and drool over me. Hurry up and take my stuff. We all know I'm here for a GOOD CAUSE, RIGHT?" She stared at Barret as she stressed her last words.

The gunman instantly growled, knowing exactly what she meant. He mumbled a few curse words under his breath as he slowly trudged towards the ninja and easily lifted the luggage with a single hand.

"Yo, what do you mean you're here for a good cause? Didn't you tell Spikey here that your old man booted your from your own home?" Cid asked flatly.

"Yess! Of course I told Cloud that. What? You don't believe me? Ask HIM!" She pointed a finger while her other hand remained hotly on her hips. She let out a snicker when she saw the gunman scowl before turning around to put on a fake smile.

"Yea! She told me 'dat already. Wha? Ya two ain't takin' my word or somethin'?"

One look into his narrowed black eyes made Cloud and Cid jump back in alarm. They shot each other a glance and quickly nodded their heads.

"Good, that's what I thought. Barret, I would like you to bring my stuff to the lovely furnished room Cid has provided for me," Yuffie demanded. It was obvious that she was enjoying her role as the order giver. Her 'server' simply shot her a dirty look before disappearing into the dim halls that led to the guest room.

Yuffie waved her hand in a reprimanding manner when she saw the pilot standing in the corner puffing away at his cigarette. He was too indulged in his craving to notice the young ninja making her way towards him. Just as Cloud was going to speak out to warn his friend, Yuffie kicked him hard in the shins, which forced him to confine his yelp from breaking out.

She snatched the cigarette out of his hand and dabbed the end into a wall before letting it fall beneath her. She quickly stomped it with her right feet before he could make a reach for it on the ground. "Must I remind you for the hundredth time that smoking is bad for you? You're gonna end up with cancer one of these days. Shame on you for not listening to me." Noticing a small bulge in his breast pocket, she reached in and grabbed the last pack of cigarettes that the pilot was depending on to get him through the days of washing dishes at the Shanghai Inn. In a blink of an eye, she crushed the entire packet between her palms and twisted the package in such a way that the final product was nothing more than a few pieces of cardboard and trampled tobacco loitered on the floor.

Cid swallowed a lump in his throat that was preventing him from speaking. His face flushed a shade of red that Yuffie didn't know existed. The color extended all the way to the tip of his ears and the ninja could mentally picture white smoke being emitted from both ends. That image made her laugh out loud to the point where tears were forming at the corner of her eyes. She hugged her stomach and continued giggling until she felt a rough hand gripping her shoulder. In an instant, she was lifted from the ground and her eyes met Cid's bloodshot ones that had the look of murder in them. "Don't worry. I see you just polished the floor, but I'm sure Cloud will sweep up the mess. He's good with those stuff."

"HEY! Who do you think I am? Your personal maid?" Cloud asked angrily.

"Of course not. You're not my personal maid…"

"That's better…" Cloud concluded, pleased with her answer.

"You didn't let me finish, Spikey. You're not my personal maid because you're Cid's. HAHAHA!" Even being suspended in air didn't refrain Yuffie from laughing.

Cid could feel his free fist shaking uncontrollably as he watched the young girl amused at the whole situation. "Yo, can I please knock the crap out of her?"

At that moment, Yuffie caught a glimpse of Tifa entering the room. She immediately fell silent and remained perfectly still in Cid's grasp. As Cloud and Cid exchanged a confused look with each other, Yuffie seized the opportunity to look hopelessly helpless. "Oh, help! Tifa, help me! Cid said he was going to beat the crap out of me and it's all Cloud's idea!" Her voice was soft and weak, almost begging for the older woman's attention.

"WHAT?" Cloud exclaimed nervously when he spotted Tifa running in.

"What are you two doing to her?" Tifa cried, unable to do anything else but stare at the ninja trapped within Cid's clutch. "Put her down!"

"As you wish, M'lady." Cid smirked as he tossed the light girl into the air. He caught her by her ankle and then allowed her to fall on her head and back. He kicked the remnants of his cigarettes into her short messy hair before playfully bowing to Tifa. "Your wish is my command."

She rolled her eyes at his silly gesture as another uncomfortable wave awkwardness hit her. She quickly stepped away from the pilot and focused on helping the ninja up to her feet. Yuffie dusted the broken cigarettes from her hair and rubbed her temples. The blow wasn't severe at all, but she couldn't let an opportunity like this go to waste. "Oh Tifa! It hurts!" she pitifully wailed.

"What happened?" Tifa demanded. She looked at all three people in the room, but neither of them responded. Cid was too busy chuckling to himself and Cloud had to purse his lips to suppress his own amusement.

Yuffie simply sat on the floor, rubbing her head with a pout on her face. "I'll tell you what happened, Teef! I was warning Cid about the dangers of cancer because you know I care a lot about him. That's when he went crazy and lifted me into the air and Cloud suggested that he drop me. And guess what? HE DID! His cigarettes fell out and I accidentally crushed them.

When Tifa wasn't looking her way, the ninja smiled wickedly and winked at the two baffled men who were lost for words.

"Oh, you poor thing. Here, let me help you up and I'll get you some ice for your head!" Tifa said, her eyes piercing vehemently at the two blondes in the room.

"Wait a minute! You don't believe-" Cloud quickly insisted when he caught Yuffie sticking her tongue out at him as Tifa helped her up to standing. Unfortunately, she was out of Tifa's peripheral vision and therefore couldn't be seen by her.

The ladies made their way out of the room and as Tifa passed Cloud, she turned her head, allowing her thick chocolate brown hair to shield her from any of his comments. "I don't want to hear about it, Cloud. You two should be ashamed of what you did."

The leader helplessly stared at the two women exiting into the dark halls. Maybe having Yuffie over wasn't such a good idea after all. She was sneaky and it was clear that she was here for something else for someone seeking refuge after getting thrown out of their home was unlikely to act in the manner she had just presented. Cloud pulled out his PHS from his pocket and quickly dialed a few numbers.

"What are you doing?" Cid asked when he saw the skeptical look in his friend's eyes.

"Something isn't right here. I want to see if Godo really kicked her out."

Barret managed to catch his words as he walked by the room. Peering inside, he found Cloud waiting for someone on the other line to pick up. "YO!" He immediately crashed in and knocked the mercenary and the PHS on to the floor

"HEY! What was that for?" Cloud grabbed the PHS before Barret could reach for it.

To the gunman's relief, Cloud sighed and dropped the cracked device. If Cid found out that he had something to do with Yuffie's sudden appearance, he was sure his ass would've been kicked out by the pilot's trustworthy spear. In addition, Cloud and Tifa would've figured out his plot to set them together, which would've made everyone living under the safe room uncomfortable.

There was a blank expression on Barret's face before he uttered a rather flimsy excuse. "Uhhh…yo, there was 'dis huge fly on yo head. Anyways, uh…sorry about yo PHS man. Hope it ain't an important call ya'll were plannin' on makin'."

After a few short attempts at trying to fix the PHS, Cloud gave up and placed the pieces on the coffee table. "No, forget about it. It's nothing. I was just calling to confirm if Yuffie really did get kicked out by Godo."

"Ya, of course she did. Why you ask?" Barret inquired.

"You should've been here before. She accused Cloud and I for wanting to beat the crap out of her. Personally, I wanted to, but I didn't. Now Lockheart is all pissed at Spike here," Cid chimed in.

"What? That foo. I'm gonna have a big talk with that brat…"

- - -

"Yo, did ya forget your mission here, ya dumb brat? The hell ya thinking when you made Spike look bad in front of Teef?" Barret furiously spat. When he saw the relaxed and carefree look on the ninja's youthful face, he felt his blood boiling all over again.

Yuffie revealed an opened palm as she tapped her foot impatiently. "Hey, I don't initiate my missions until I get paid first. So far, I got ZIP from you."

Barret scanned the halls to make sure no one was near before closing the door behind him tightly. He reached into his pockets and pulled out a few glowing materias and a sack of gil. He stuffed the contents into the thief's hands and said, "There ya go. Happy?"

He expected to see a grin but instead found her scowling as she stared at the items in her hands. "This is my pay? Don't make me laugh."

Now where did I hear that line before? As Barret pondered if he had heard the familiar phrase before, there was a knock on the door. "Shit. Quick, git under the bed! I don't wanna be seen with ya."

When Yuffie was out of sight, Barret opened the door and found Tifa smiling pleasantly with a tray of ice and towels in her hand.

"Hi Barret. Have you seen-"

"Have I seen Yuffie? Nah, haven't. See ya later, Teef."

He immediately shut the door again and motioned for Yuffie to step out. "Yo! Teef is looking for ya. Git out of here now. The deal is on, right?"

"This pay is going to last you one and a half day at most. You better find me something better. Time is ticking. Ta-ta."

- - -

Tifa,

I simply can't wait to go to Gold Saucer with you. It's unfortunate that we couldn't spend more time together due to our busy schedules, but I promise we'll have fun at GS. By the way, I hope you're not mad at me over the 'Yuffie' incident. I swear I took no part in it! You know how that girl can act sometimes. Well, I hope you get this note soon. I'm out and probably won't be back home until dinnertime. Take care.

Love,

C-

"BOO!" Yuffie exclaimed as she emerged from behind the sofa Cid was sitting in.

Her sudden outburst caused him to jump up from his seat, sending his letter and pen flying out of his hands. "&#!" When he was realized it was Yuffie behind him, he sent her a stern glare that made her cower into the corner. He hastily picked up the letter and the pen, unsure if he was going to add something else. When he tried scanning over the note, he felt a finger tap his shoulder. Turning around, he jumped for the second time when he saw the ninja flash him a creepy smile. "Where the hell did you come from? Weren't you just in that corner?"

"Never mind that. Wha'cha doing?" She tiptoed, trying to read the content in the note.

"None of your damn business, kid. Scram," Cid answered, annoyed at her prying.

"Tell me! Pleaseee!"

Figuring that it would be easier to tell her what he was up to rather than to listen to her piercing pleas, he briefly showed the letter to the ninja. "There. I'm trying to hook Cloud and Tifa up. I'm writing a note to Tifa and signing Cloud's name at the end of it." Before she could reach for the paper, Cid slapped her hand away with the pen. "There. Now leave me alone. I gotta slip this into her room before I leave to work on the rocket."

"I can do it for you," Yuffie offered, seeing that she should be taking some action to help Cloud and Tifa now that she had just been paid.

"Well…I AM late, but can I really trust you, brat?" Cid folded the piece of paper and thought for a moment if he would be making a big mistake if he handed the note to her. Who knew what types of plot Yuffie's mind was generating at the moment.

"Look, I'm a girl so it'll be easy for me to slip it into her room. What excuse are you going to make up if she catches you?"

Damn, she had a point there.

"Fine." With a sigh, the tired pilot reluctantly handed the paper to her and idly played with the pen between his fingers. "But you better not have something fishy up your sleeves. I smell something rotten and it ain't my cigarettes thanks to you."

"You should be grateful that you have such a gorgeous, amazing, talented, caring, sweet-"

"Shut it, you little monster." Cid expertly tossed the pen into her opened bite, causing her to choke back on her own words. "I'll be back in a few hours. Make sure you don't screw up my house. It would be even better if you stayed OUT of my house."

---

"There, that should make Tifa a happy camper," Yuffie said as she slipped the note Cid wrote under her pillow. Tiptoeing out in order to not wake the sleeping woman, she caught sight of something beautiful. Next to a stack of paper on Tifa's desk was her collection of materias. She was unable to successfully walk out the door before backtracking to the source of the sparkling marbles. Her hand tentatively reached out, unsure if she could pull off stealing such a huge assortment with its owners only a few feet away.

Yuffie's attention was diverted when she saw a sheet a blank paper that was just beckoning to be written on. Taking out the pen that she had been clenching in her mouth, she finally decided to settle on writing a note than blatantly stealing in front of her friend. She pondered for a moment on what she wanted to be on the blank sheet, but her eyes kept drifting back to the materias that were only a few inches away from her.

"Okay! Stop it, Yuffie! You gotta concentrate on helping Tifa and Cloud first. Once the lovebirds are together, they'll be too busy oogling at each other to care about their materias!" she told herself. Writing was never her forte. She exceeded mostly in the art of battle and stealing, but how hard could writing a love letter be?

Cloud,

Did I ever tell you that you make my heart jump when you stare at me with your Sapphire blue eyes? They seem to glitter like a mastered ALL materia, but I think they're worth more than 1,000,000 gils. By the way, I can't believe a mastered ALL materia is only worth 1,000,000 gils. It takes forever to level that sucker up. Uh, anyways…did I ever tell you that your hair reminds me of the Rising Sun? Speaking of the Rising Sun, did you know that materias have a 2x growth rate when equipped on to that weapon? And uh…your lovely lips appear juicer than a sizzling Summon materia. Oh yeah, I would really like to get my hands on KOTR so can you please just insert it into my Confor--...gloves? Thanks a bunch, you hot stuff.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

-From the sexy lass next door.

"Nyuk nyuk nyuk…that wasn't so bad. Now…time to place this into Cloud's room..."

- - -

Author's Notes: Hehe, here's chapter IV. I had a blast using Yuffie in this chapter and there will be more insanity from her in the future. Hope you all enjoyed and sorry it took so long for me to update. I now have some extra time to write since my midterms are out of the way! Once again, thank you for reading and please leave a review. D