CRESTER DARRINGWAY AND MY TRIP TO THE MALL

Dedicate to my friends norman "TEH SPEEDBOUT" wilder 4 elping me thru my greef.

"HELLO BIRTCHES" I Am Crester Darringway hello I am writing the next Chapter OF My storie axsept I 4got wut the last 1 wus about so heres my trip in a mall now im gunna write something meaningfukk 2 start my store kuz that's wut my englihs teacher said kuz I need\\toget in2 callej kuz mom saysd I cent rly on my football skils to get me at life buit tht just meens shes a retarded but she stoped givin me if I don't.

Mom alwayz sayd 2 listen 2 the police evn if they rty 2 take dad away but ths 1 tiem in the mal; I shouldn't hav dun it.

I wuz at at the malll at 1 time where I wuz shoping 4 a gf kuz my old thing playd 4 the losig teerm if u no wut I meen (CHEETERS NVR WIN. HOP JEFF ENJOYZ AlL THE DISSEESSES I GAEV U HA!!( so I ssaw a gurl at a store in the stor at when i went ini ask for4 a fone# (OR ASS I CALL THEM FUN NUMBRE AM I RITE) but shegave me the store numer so I footba

I wus outsid the stor I saw a football shoop wiht a girl in ther who wuz all hot al over the placxe and I could tel by the waqy she was lookin at teh futbull stuff tht she wanted me. I decidd that I wud """throw a bal at her reseevur;" and went in 2 that in that sotre tht she wuz in and all of s asdden.she I saw my unkle his name was Lumbersaw Darringway who had the same last name as me kuz he wuz in my famly but not my dad but lieh his dad or uncle also or sumthin.

"HELLO UNCLE LUMBERJACKDARRINGWAY" I said to him with a manhug:

"HEKKO CRESTRR DARRINGWAY" HE SAID TO Me as he was hay to c me.

"Y r u here uncle LumbarsaW" I asked him as I admirt his vry manly mustash.

"I AM HERER BECAUSE I AM SHOP ING FOR A FOOTBAL BECUZ I AM MAKING A FOOTBAL TEEM THAT I WILL COACH" IS WUT HE SAID.

I WILL HELP U MAEK A TEAM KUZ I AMA NICEGUY WHOPUTS FAMLU 1RST "I Sios to him also ths is y my gf shudnt had put owt 4 th rest uv the football teem kuz I was gunna Make dad adopd her 2 my family kuz I lovd hre her that muhc AND I ALWAYS PUT FALMIY FIRSTBITCH!!11!1

"thank you CRESTER YOU CAN PALY ANY POSITIUN YOU WOULD WANT NOW WE SHUD GET SUM GEER." He said

""OK UNCLE BANDSAW WUT SHUOD WE GET." I ASKED HIM QUESTUIOENINGLY.

And with a few minits wewere rdy 2 go we got a football.

"WUT SHUD WE NAME OUR TEAM" askes uncle bandwagon.

'wE SHOUD NAEM IT THE CRESTER DARRINGWAYS COWBOYS" I explaynd that ppl wud liek us the most if we had a naem tht told who we wer but also wuz recognizible and also ppl who lieked the dalles cowboys (GO COWBOYSSZZ!!11111111111) WUD ALso probubly liek us.

"I AGREED" he agreed with me so we wer rdy 2 own sum wimps.

"WE NED CHEERLEEDERZ" i told him tht we needed them.

"BUT ALL THE CHERERS IN MY SKOOL R LYING HORES I said.

"I am suddenly the grl in the sotre turned arund and she was rly hat "I am a cheerleader and I xan cheer 4 ur teem becase crESTER is very atracktiv. She was also vry attRACKtiv if u no wut I meant. "My nam is vannnessicaa but I can call me Flipper THE BATMOBEEL Tomberly.

k i sed but she say k at th same tiem and I had 2 tel her not 2 inturupt me but it wuz ok kuz I had feelings tht in the end we wud get past theher pleying sokker and lern 2 lov. (I WONT SAY NEMORE KUZ I WONT SPOIL ANYTHONG FOR THE REEDER BUT I WANT U KEEP READING SO LETS JUST SAY THAT I PLYD SUM GOOD OFFENS AND PRETY SOON WUZ AT FIRSD DOWN WITH HUR IF U NO WUT I MEAN)(

we as weas we were walking out th (SHIT BRB TA GAYM IS ON.) (K SRRY THT TOOK SO LONG) as we we were walking out the door when a handred hot gurl with socur stopped us.

"giv us bak flipper we ply socker!" is whut they all said at us

"NO ITS NOT TRU FLIPPER I TURNED TO HER AND SHE WAS SAD KUZ WE NEW HER SECRET.

"ITS OK I 4GIV U AND UR A BAB" I told her but how we were going to get pass them!

"TIME TO MAKE SOME PLAYS" said uncle Lumerslaw arringway.

"LETS GO" "COWBOYS!" I Yell as i, crester darringway and uncle sumbersaw darringway and Flipper vanesika teh batmowbil tomplizkikon

We pushd thru them and thy wer all hawt so sometimes I cud see their "lines of scrimej" so we made it to the van and drove away into the sunset and towardz our dreams.

THINGS R GOOD 4 NOW BUT NEXT CHAPTR NT 2 SPOIL ANYTHING BUT WE HAV A NEW OBSTICL TO OVERCUM JUST LIKE WUT MY GF WHO IS A BICH SAY I DO.