okay yes this took forever and i'm sorry, i had a lot of crap going on and i was at a friends house, writhing gay love stories on someelses computer not a good idea, anyway on with the story. BTW the first paragraph is going to be a flash back in the forum of a dream about what "the incident" it will be italicized so if you can't take reading it just skip over till you get to regular print. Oh and before i forget there is going to be self-harm but i will warn you when it comes up. I don't own fruits basket or it's characters the only thing i own is this story. I think i forgot to put that in the other chapters... sorry. hope you enjoy

"Well when my friends over there turn the camera on I'm going to fuck you till you beg for more and when I'm done with you my friends are going to take turns with you to." He leaned down closer to Kyo as he lightly stroked down his chest to his penis emitting a violent shiver of fear from Kyo who had gone ghostly pale. The man then whispered something Kyo would never forget and started to rip Kyo clothes of ignoring the cries, pleas and begs to stop coming for the shivering boy. When Kyo's clothes were fully removed the man looked down at him with an greedy hunger that sent waves of fear through Kyo's body. "Well, well, well, look at you. You're so beautiful with that flawless caramel skin, not a single freckle mars you. I can't wait to carve my mark, it's not everyday i get a beautiful canvas like you most of mine have already been painted on if you know what i mean. However, you'll be my first, my first virgin that is." The man on top of Kyo slurred while rubbing up and down Kyo's still flaccid member. Kyo was to frightened and grossed out to react to being played with. "You're sick" Kyo spat at the man who just laughed at the pure hatred masked on Kyo's face. "Oh, no need to be nasty it's rather rude." the man said to Kyo as if he were talking to a little kid who just got caught stealing. "Because bad things happen to nasty little virgins like yourself" at that he dropped Kyo's member and snapped his fingers. The tall skinny guy walked over and pulled something out of his pocket. "Wh-at i-i-i-s th-at?" Kyo's studdered, fear obvious in his voice. "Thank you Tom" the guy on-top of Kyo said before answering Kyo's question. "Oh don't worry this will make you feel really good i swear. You'll like it" Kyo looked at the man's hands and saw what looked like a little blue gel pill. "What the hell is he going to do with that" he thought when suddenly his legs were picked up and pushed against his face. "Ah, what the hell ar..." he didn't get to finish his sentence as he felt the pill being pushed into his ass along with the man's finger making it go in deeper. "STOP, WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU PERVERT. DON'T TOUCH ME THERE." Kyo screeched. "Oh calm down little virgin give it a second, like i said this will make you feel good." the man grinned leaning over Kyo. He dipped his head down to Kyo's neck and lightly sucked getting a breathless moan of shock from Kyo. "Please stop you don't have to do this. I promise i won't tell anyone if you let me go now" Kyo pleaded. "now why would we do that" the man laughed "we're just getting to the good part." okay it's over now on to Kyo waking up from his dream.

Kyo bolted up from his bed soaking wet in his sweat, panting heavily. Tears were flowing freely from his eyes and he felt a huge tightness in his chest preventing him form being able to breath properly. He was shivering violently despite the fact the he was sweating profusely as he slowly got out of bed and tiptoed to the bathroom not wanting to wake anyone up. He stepped onto the cold tile floor and closed the door silently. It was the second night in a row that he tried to stay up to ovoid the nightmares and the second night he had failed. He couldn't take the pain it was eating away at him taking the air out of his lungs. He needed to breath, he haven't been able to since it happened two days ago, and he started to feel himself panic. Air he needed air, but his lungs were like two dead weights in his chest. All of the things that happened before were starting to poor back into him, the pain, the hopelessness, the defeat. He couldn't take it anymore, he didn't want to feel any of this, all he wanted to do was forget. He started looking frantically through the cabinets and looking for something, anything to take the pain away. He stopped when he found a bag of little plastic depose able razors, Tohru's he knew for a fact that they were hers. There was about fifteen in the bag. "Will she notice if i take one" Kyo wondered as he slowly took one out of the bag. "No Tohru's to air headed to notice something like that" he reassured himself as he dismantled the little pink razor throwing away everything except for the two thin sliver razor blades that were trapped with in the pink prison. He sat down on the toilet in a trance the cool metal was reassuring to the touch whispering words of encouragement, promising relief from his pain.

okay he is about to hurt himself so if you can't take it don't read it i'll tell you when it's over. He placed on of the razors down and took the other into his right hand while turning his left arm over to reveal the under forearm. He felt anxiety mixed with excitement, "maybe this will take it all away, maybe i'll finally be able to breath again". he pressed the tip of the razor to his arm and started to add pressure when he felt it break the skin he took a sharp intake of air adrenalin pouring into his chest replacing the the dead weights with a floating relief. He could feel the air slowly coming back, but it wasn't enough. He dragged the blade across his flesh watching as his skin separated, blood rising and tipping over the edge in bright clumps. He was so mesmerized by the whole thing, he wanted to do it again, so he did he repeated this over and over again feeling lighter and lighter with each slash of the blade. He went deeper with everyone. It was like everything was slipping away, the crushing feeling of suffocation, the feeling of being unwanted, the self-hate it was all flowing away with the rivers of blood streaming down his arms and dripping onto the tile floor. The sweet pain of the razor was taking away the foul pain of everything he wanted to forget, it was a blanket of numbing that he so desperately clung to. okay it's over he isn't going to cut anymore

He was so caught up in his self-mutilation that he didn't hear someone knocking at the door.

Yuki was not a deep sleeper by any stretch of he imagination that's why he had to have his room across the hall from Tohru's and Shigure's rooms, they both snored and would keep the poor rat up all night if he were to have a room next to theirs, and next to Kyo's, he was a very quiet sleeper so it was the only way it would work. Though Yuki wasn't all that happy about it. Yuki woke up to a strange noise coming form Kyo's room. However it wasn't the first time for this to have happened, it happened the night before as well. Yuki would be woken up by small whimpers and strange words that would come form Kyo's room, words like "stop", "please no", and "don't" over and over again like a broken record. He didn't understand it Kyo never talked in his sleep. Tonight was different though it wasn't like the other night when Kyo simply stopped and Yuki went back to sleep. No tonight instead of it just stopping and being silent once again Yuki heard Kyo get out of bed and go into the jack-and-jill bathroom they shared. Then he heard some shuffling around and then silence again. Yuli sat up and looked at the bathroom door attached to his room and saw that the light was still on but no sound was coming through which didn't make since it was 5:30am on a Tuesday the time Kyo would normally get up to take a shower and get ready for school. However the shower wasn't running. Yuki decided to see what was going on and walked over to the bathroom door he knocked a few times but no reply came, "hey you stupid cat what the hell are you doing in there open up." the rat stopped short and thought to himself "what it the cat is jacking off?" he didn't want to see that, but when still no reply came he started to worry. "what if he passed out or something?" Yuki graved the spare key that he hid on the top of the door frame and slipped it into the door to unlock it. He silently opened the door and was met with the most horrific scene he'd ever seen. "Kyo what did you do?"

okay i know i left on a cliff hanger and reading fanfiction myself i know how infuriating it is to get to a cliff hanger and having to think about how long it's going to take for them to continue, and to be totally ready to kill someone because you just have to know what the hell is going to happen (hence the reason i only read completed stories) but i promise i will get the next chapter up as soon as possible. I have a lot of ideas of how i'm going to continue and later finish this story out, so i need to sort through them and decide if i'm going to make this into a really dark and depressing story with a good ending, or if i'm going to make it into a mildly dark and depressing story with a good ending. I'm telling you though i have a really good idea for the "really dark and depressing one". Anyways review and tell me what you think... i'm sorry for hurting Kyo again it makes me really sad because i'm the type of person that lives in my story while i'm reading/writhing it, so i'm feeling really depressed right now :(