She was lying in bed replaying the restaurant scene over in her head. The image of all the color draining from Rusty's face was haunting her. They had talked when they got back to the condo, but it mainly consisted of her trying to reassure him that he had not embarrassed her. She had sent him off to bed because she knew the conversation was going nowhere productive and he look exhausted. Now sleep was eluding her even though she was so drained. She decided to make a cup of tea hoping that would bring sleep. She was thankful that tomorrow was Saturday and God willing she would have the day off. She padded to the kitchen silently, avoiding the creaky spot in the hallway, and then she put the kettle on the stove. She gathered the supplies and waited for the water. Just before it started to hiss she pulled it off and poured the water in the cup.

There was a noise that stopped her dead in her tracks. She set the cup down and listened. There it was again. This time the sound registered, it was Rusty. She hadn't heard it in so long. He was dreaming, no more like having a nightmare. She moved quickly down the hall abandoning her tea on the counter. She stood outside his door for a minute listening, and decided to go inside. She pushed the door open and moved to the bed. He wasn't thrashing around, but he his covers were a mess, meaning that at some point he had been. Now he was saying, "Get off me," over and over. When he had come to live with her he had nightmares for the first few months, and then they had slowly dissipated. She had found it comforting that he had finally relaxed and felt safe in her home, in their home. But here they were again.

She knew that if she woke him up he would panic and he would be embarrassed all over again. After the night they had that was the last thing she wanted. She knelt down and slowly put her hand on his back. She just held it there for a minute and then slowly rubbed tiny, soft circles. He quieted after a few minutes and seemed to fall back into a deeper sleep. She went from kneeling to sitting next to his bed. She let her back lean against the bed listening to his breathing. She envied his ability to sleep, but she was glad that he was nonetheless.

She had spent many hours in her other kid's rooms at night, but for totally different reasons. It was her therapy after a long day that usually went into the night because of work. When her fellow officers despised her every action she found it soothing to come home to her children even if they were in bed already. She would watch their sleeping forms for a few minutes relishing in the fact that they were with her, and that they were safe.

She started to get up when he changed positions and started mumbling. She stayed still, waiting to make sure he was sleeping soundly. When she was satisfied she made her way out closing the door quietly. She went back to bed, leaving the tea in the kitchen. She didn't need it anymore.

He woke up early and groaned because it was Saturday, the one day that he was able to sleep in. He rolled out of bed and headed to the kitchen to make some coffee. He didn't hear Sharon up yet, and that surprised him, she was always up before him unless she got in super late. As he came into the kitchen he noticed the teacup sitting on the cabinet, bag still in it, and the kettle sitting on the counter. Sharon had made tea last night, but she just left it. This was odd for two reasons; one she didn't leave messes, and two why would she make tea and not take a single sip.

He came to the conclusion that something had interrupted her, and then panic set in, did she leave for work and not tell him? Was she even still here? He headed down the hall stopping outside her door. There were no noises, he pushed the door open a tiny bit, he hardly ever went in her room, but he needed to know. Once the door was open enough he saw her sleeping form in bed. 'Good,' he thought. He closed the door with only a tiny click. Sharon worked too hard, too many hours, and she had to deal with him too; she deserved to sleep.

He headed back to the kitchen he started the coffee, cleaned up the teacup, and then he opened the fridge to see what they could have for breakfast. While he was reaching for eggs he heard his phone go off in his bedroom. He basically ran down the hall trying to shut it off before it woke Sharon up. It was his mom. "Hello," he answered hurriedly shutting his door.

"Good morning honey, did I wake you?"

"No, I was making coffee."

"Oh…well good. I was wondering if you had made a decision about tonight yet?"

"I want to mom, but I won't if that man from the play is going to be around." He couldn't handle that, but he needed to find out what it was his mom wanted from him. The only way he knew to do that was to go stay with her. Sharon had told him she would fight for him, but he didn't want her to have to. He wanted to help her.

"Just you and me. So I can count on spending the night with you then, right?"

"Yeah mom, sure, but you have to come here to get me." He knew Sharon wanted to meet his mother, and if he was going to go over there he figured he would just get it over with.

"That's not a problem just send me the address. How does 3 o'clock sound?" she asked.

"I will send you the address, see you then." He hung up before she could say anything else. Now he just needed to get Sharon onboard, and convince her that he could handle this. He heard the bathroom door close, and that brought him back to reality, Sharon was awake. He ran back to the kitchen.

She had woken up to Rusty running down the hall. She laid there wondering what in the world was going on and then the noise before the running had registered, his phone. She rolled over and looked at the clock, it was only 7AM, way too early for him to be up and active. She got out of bed to make sure that everything was all right; grabbing her robe on the way out the door she walked down the hall to his room. The door was closed, but she could hear him talking. She just caught words here and there, but she got the gist of it. She didn't want to be caught outside his door so she made her presence known by going into the bathroom and closing the door pretty loudly.

Tonight was going to be tough. Rusty hadn't told her that he was going yet, but she knew what his answer was going to be. She had hoped after last night he would change his mind and give it a little more time. Things were feeling rushed. He was slipping away. There was a side of her that was happy for him because who didn't want to be close to their mother, but the other side of her, the mom side, knew that things were complicated and there was a good chance things would go downhill. How many times had Sharon Beck disappointed him? She knew it was only a matter of time before it happened again.

As she entered the kitchen he was busy chopping something. She came up behind him softly laying a hand on his shoulder looking over to see what he was busy with. To her surprise he didn't jump at her touch, he just smiled and said, "Hey."

"You're up early," she said moving to the coffee pot to pour a cup.

"Yeah I had weird dreams, and then I just woke up and decided to stay up. Do you want onion?"

"I would thank you. Do you still want to go get those shoes today?" She was trying her best to be casual, and if she brought up plans then he would be forced to talk about tonight.

He had his back to her, but she saw him tense up and she felt a little guilty for doing that to him. She had thought that maybe it would ease the conversation and he wouldn't feel the need to try to find a way into the subject.

He flipped the omelet in the pan and turned to face her. "Yeah if you are up to it, but uh, what time do you think we will be back?"

"If we need to be back for something then we can be." She raised an eyebrow questioning him. He turned back to the stove and flipped the omelet out onto a plate. He brought it over to her at the table along with his. They just sat there looking at each other for a minute.

"Ok so like I, uh, I am going to go stay with my mom tonight-I told her she could pick me up here around three. I wanted her to come here so you could like meet her, and maybe you would see that she isn't a bad person. She's not a bad person Sharon she just has had some bad times. Is it ok that I asked her to pick me up here?"

His face was so unsure and he was now just pushing his food around his place avoiding her gaze. She hated what this was doing to him. "I would like to meet her, I am glad that you are ready for that." She smiled at him reassuringly, and she thought that there was a flicker of hope across his face. "Rusty, you know I am on your side I wouldn't embarrass you. You know that right?"

"Of course I do Sharon, I always know that." He finally took a bite, and she thought that was a good sign.

There were things about Sharon that he would probably never understand, and today was just one more example of that. He had told her that he was going to stay with his mom and her response was to take him and buy him the shoes he had been wanting. His other ones were still in good condition, but he had mentioned that he saw some he liked last week and she just took him and got them for him today. He had told her that he invited his mom to the condo, and she said she was glad.

He didn't think that she was just trying extra hard to keep him liking her. That was just how she was. She wanted to take care of him. He had told her that he thought his mom was hiding something, and she had told him that he should try to listen and understand that she was maybe still looking for the right words. Sharon, was someone that always surprised him. In the beginning he had basically screamed that he hated her, and she had pulled him closer. She had managed to break down a wall down and wiggle her way in. He loved her, but he had never told her.

Now he was in his room getting ready to go with his mom, and all he felt was fear. It was the kind of fear that he had felt every time he went to a new foster home. It was the thought that maybe it would be better this time, but knowing in the pit of his stomach that it probably wouldn't be.

He looked at the clock 2:30, she would be getting there soon…maybe. He had his bag packed and he was ready to go, but he wasn't ready to leave his room. Then there it was, a tiny knock on his door. He knew he should've already gone out to talk to her. "Come in," he said.

She opened the door and stood leaning in the doorframe just giving him that look, the one that was reserved for him. It was the one that brought a pain to his chest sometimes. "Ready to go?"

"Yeah, I was on my way out there." It wasn't a lie really because he was going to have to come out there eventually.

"Hmm." He hated the hums sometimes. He stood up to grab his bag, but she stepped closer and he froze. She was about to say something when he did something that surprised himself. He hugged her. It was awkward at first and he was tense, but when she wrapped her arms around him he relaxed. It felt right. She didn't let go, she just squeezed tighter and whispered, "Whatever happens, I will be here." All he could do was shake his head. He started to let go and she slid her hands to his shoulders. Her eyes told him what he needed to hear. She loved him. She turned and left him standing there waiting for him to follow her.

He grabbed his bag and headed to the living room, and on his way, there was a knock on the door. He quickened his step. Sharon was waiting by the door for him to get in there. He set down his bag and she answered the door.

She had years of experience hiding her emotions, schooling her voice and her facial expressions, and dealing with the scum of the earth. She had told herself that Sharon Beck would be no problem, but suddenly she was a little nervous. She opened the door and there she was standing there on her doorstep. The moment she had dreaded for so long now. She forced herself to smile and invite her in.

"Thank you," Sharon Beck said stepping inside.

She was looking around the apartment, and suddenly Rusty looked very uncomfortable. "Did you have any trouble finding the place?" That was just about the lamest thing that she could've said.

"No Rusty gave me good directions."

"Good," she said moving further into the living room, "Rusty said that you guys have plans to maybe go to a movie later."

"Look Captain you don't have to play nice with me. In fact…"

"Mom!" Rusty stepped between them. She put her hand on his shoulder instinctively, but dropped it seconds later.

"It's ok Rusty, Ms. Beck I was simply trying to be civil."

"You've given Rusty a nice place and all, but there is something you should remember. I am his mother."

"Mom, Sharon has just been helping me out since you left me!"

"We should get going. I need to stop and get my paycheck before we head home."

Rusty was in shock. He had a look of almost horror on his face. She hadn't truly expected his mother to act this way right up front, but she always knew there was a chance. The things she wanted to do to this woman right now, but no she couldn't think about that right now. She needed to get Rusty alone, and give him an out if he wanted to take it.

"Rusty come get those snacks you wanted to take, excuse us for one second Ms. Beck." She tugged on Rusty's arm.

When they got in the kitchen she grabbed a bag and threw some food in it quickly to keep up the act. She was surprised when she heard the smallest voice he had ever used say, "Sharon I am so sorry."

"Honey, do not apologize. Do you want to go because I can stop all of this?" She wanted so bad to just go give Ms. Beck a piece of her mind and call this whole little get-together off. It wasn't her call though she had told Rusty he was in control, but there was a point where she was still the adult and he was the child.

"She's like Daniel, and she wants something Sharon. I know what you said before, but I know when people want something."

"You coming?" his mother yelled from the living room.

"You don't have to be brave with me. I know you want to do this your way…" He interrupted, "I will be safe. I want to go, let me do this."

This kid was going to be the death of her.

"RUSTY LET'S GO!"

He shook his head. "Ok I'm coming." He grabbed the bag of food and started walking, but he turned back to her, "I love you Sharon." He was gone around the corner before she could even register what just happened.

She quickly recovered and caught him as he was about the leave, "I love you too." He smiled and then they were gone.

'Why did I let him walk out that door?'