A/N: sorry for the late update. I'm working on my other stories as well, anyways, this is not the last chapter, if it seems that way, I apologize there's more to come and don't worry. This won't be easy for Edward. Bella is going to make him really work for this relationship. Okay. Do that review thing pretty please. New chapter real soon! I promise.

I unzipped my little black bag, the shiny razor blades and scissors smiling up at me. They were so beautiful. I let my fingers trace over them lightly, cold to the touch. The feeling I got from merely touching them was ecstasy because I knew what was coming. I could feel my body start to shake, aching for the slice of those beautiful silver instruments…but I couldn't do it. There they lay in front of me, in a pretty row each one begging me to use it, but I couldn't. I angrily pushed the bag off of my bed and turned away from them on my side. I was so angry at myself for letting him get to me. It was so easy for him; he knew exactly what he was doing before he did it. I wanted to do it just to spite him. I quickly sat up, reaching over the edge of my bed to grab the bag again. I took a deep breath, holding the bag close to me for a few moments, calming myself with its presence. I laid it open in front of me on the bed again, staring at it for a few seconds.

The loud sound of him, landing on my bedroom floor alerted me to his presence which meant that he wanted me to know he was there, or he would've made sure I was asleep or that I hadn't heard him at all. He was usually a lot more stealthy then that. I glanced up at him but only for a moment. I was still angry with him and that would not break easily.

"I thought I locked that window." I said, staring down at my blades, still neatly lined in a row. If he touched them, I had a plan to rip his throat out. He'd probably kill me first, but then of course, I'd have tried right? He ignored my comment, moving so that he could see my face. I waited for him to speak not giving him the satisfaction of me acknowledging or indulging in his presence.

I could feel him struggling with his words, it was strange, he was usually so put together. Everything he said, sounded like It came from a well-rehearsed speech. I looked up at him, wanting to see the struggle in his face. But it wasn't there. His face remained calm as always.

"I'm here to apologize." His voice was genuine. Soft. I knew he meant it. I swallowed, looking up at him. I bit down on my lip, not sure how to respond.

"Um…for what?" I said finally, not sure if I really wanted an answer for that or not. He moved now so that he was sitting on the edge of my bed, looking up at me to look at my face, to make sure that he wasn't pushing his luck.

I shrugged, not really caring where he sat as long as he left soon. He leaned in, but only about a quarter of an inch or so, he reached out a hand to touch my face but revoked it almost immediately. I could tell he was trying hard not to upset me, like I was tipped bottle and one push would cause me to spill. He let out a loud frustrated sigh before speaking, but I could tell that he was frustrated with himself and not me.

"For touching your things. Stealing them. Not trying to talk to you about it. Not listening. Not…" He stopped, looking away from me for a long time, and then he turned back to me, a new expression on his face. He was falling apart.

"Bella, I'm sorry." He said, his voice sounding shaky, which was definitely new for Edward Cullen. "Bella, I am so sorry. I don't expect you to take me back…I don't even expect you to want to see me again. I had to come though, I had to apologize. I'm sorry." He repeated, and it made my heart hurt. He leaned in, finally actually touching me, he pulled my head just slightly so that my forehead met his lips and then he was making his way back to my window to depart. I had only seconds to make a decision that I really didn't want to have to make, but it was completely beyond me now. I got up quickly, practically tripping over myself to get to the window. I held my black bag close to my chest, while I positioned myself in front of the window.

"Wait…" I said softly, although I didn't need to, he'd stopped dead when he'd heard me scrambling around.

"I hate you right now." I finally said, and his voice turned into a frown, but I had to do this. I knew somewhere deep down, that being without him, is far worse than being with him with a few problems. I didn't need my greatest fear to be realized…again. I shifted slightly, searching for the right words in my head.

"But that doesn't change the fact that I love you." I frowned at myself realizing that I didn't make any sense, but then I shook my head, plowing on.

"You should have listened. You should have cared enough to ask if I was alright…" He nodded his agreement to all this and that, as simple as it was made me feel a little bit better.

"And, you shouldn't have taken me things…it was really rude." I said fixing him with an angry glare, as he nodded again.

"But now, I need you to take them back from me." I said holding the black bag out in front of me for him to take. His eyes widened with confusion, he was so slow sometimes. I let out my own frustrated sigh and then shook my head.
"It upsets you. I don't like making you upset no matter how much you make ME upset, I won't let the downfall of this relationship be my fault, so hurry up and take them before I lose the nerve." I said still holding the bag out in front of me, but now tapping my foot nervously. He looked a little scared, his eyes darting from the bag to me, and then to me and the bag again. I turned away from him for a moment, taking a deep breath, telling myself that this was worth it, and that I could do it, before turning back to him.

I pressed the bag against his chest. "Edward, I need help." I said in a small voice. He stared at me for a half a second and then took the bag, holding it tightly in his hand before, turning back to the window.

"Where are you going?" I said, suddenly painfully aware of the fact that he could still leave. He turned back to me and then mumbled quietly,

"I'm just going to take this home. I'll be back before you even get tired, I promise. I just want to make sure that you won't have any temptation. These won't be in the house."

I bit down on my lip hard. This was going to be so difficult, but I let him leave, with my precious bag in tow. A double blow. It was almost impossible to withhold. I bit so hard on my lip that it started to bleed, and the moment I tasted blood, I thought I was going to pass out. It was strange how the blood gushing from my arms never affected me, when the slightest cut I ever got before would send me into a dizzy spell. It's amazing what a few months separated from the only thing that mattered will do to you. I collapsed onto my bed, curling up, not caring if I was asleep by the time he came back. I drifted off to sleep that night, thinking of how badly I needed to call Jacob Black.