Disclaimer: As always, these characters are not my own but belong to Charlaine Harris, a truly wonderful writer. I'm just borrowing Eric for a bit while my hubby's too busy with video games to notice ;)

Chapter Four

"Eric, am I going to die?"

Her words broke through my train of thought, images of doom and gloom that were running through my mind at vampire speed. How do I tell her what type of death sentence has possibly become for her?This wasn't the way things were suppose to end. She should not have been turned by Pam for one. That pleasure was reserved for me alone. But that deed was done and nothing could take it back. My Sookie was indeed undead yet something was definitely not right.

"Eric?" she asked again and I looked up to meet her eyes that were wide with fright. I wasn't thinking about the fact that she could feel my fear though the bond and I was certain that she was terrified.

"Eric?"

"Sookie, if we do not find a way for you to both take in nourishment as well as sleep during the day, your body will eventually begin to degrade and you will die. I am not prepared to let that happen."

"Follow me" I said softly to both of them and went back into the kitchen. Under the cabinet, I found a small container of tuna fish. Retched stuff, I tell you, smells just plain inedible even if I were human. Pam had brought a few cans over when she had me "pet sit" her cat a while back.

"Pam has a cat?"

"Yes. Some white hairball I believe she named Snookums or some idiotic shit like that."

Opening the top off the can, I handed it to Sookie. Both she and Pam looked at me like I had lost my mind. Maybe I had but at this point I was willing to try anything and everything to get some sort of nourishment into her.

I watched as she sniffed the contents, her nose wrinkling in disgust as the strong odor offended her sense of smell. Gently she took a bit between her fingers and raised it to her lips as Pam took a couple of steps back. Sookie chewed the bit of fish a few times and swallowed, looked back at me and proceeded to expel the contents onto the floor. Well, I guess human food was a no go.

"I'm sorry Eric." is all that she could say as tears once again stained her eyes red. I pulled her to my chest and held her, kissing the top of her head and I looked over at Pam. She had finally started to realize the seriousness of the situation and two emotions I had never seen in Pam's eyes in all the years I had known her reflected back at me –sadness and regret.

"We will figure this out." I said softly to both of my girls but also for my own benefit. "There is an explanation as to what is happening and there has got to be someone who knows how to fix it. We just have to know who to ask and I have a pretty good idea where to start. Pam, call up Fangtasia. Tell them we will not be in for at least two nights and have someone cover for us. We're going to see the Oracle."

Pam nodded and left the room.

"The Oracle? Like on 'The Matrix'" my darling Sookie asked, a hint of amusement in her voice.

"The Matrix?"

"Yeah, its a movie with Keanu Reeves. There's a wise woman called the Oracle that Neo goes to see who can tell prophecy and the future."

I laughed and I could feel the vibrations ripple through her small body still against me. "You and your movie references. But in this case, you're correct. The Oracle is a very old vampire who is very wise. Some say she sees the future, while others believe she has just learned from the past. It's the past I am hoping she can help me with. Maybe this has happened before and she will know what to do."

"I hope so. I finally accepted the fact I wanted to be with you for eternity and now I'm hearing I have one or two weeks. I feel like a patient who just found out they have end stage cancer and there's nothing they can do. I always manage to mangle things up, Eric. First as a human and now as a vampire." Again, she started to cry, this time with her head buried in my chest.

I took her by the hand and led her upstairs to the master bedroom and laid her gently down as I came around to the other side and climbed in beside her. Instead of allowing me to spoon with her, she turned to face me and again buried her face against my chest. I wrapped my arms around her and just held her tight. My own eyes threatening to overflow once again. Yeah, mighty Viking that I was, fixing to have a second tearfest in less than 24 hours. I managed to pull myself together and let her cleansing sobs manage for the both of us as I stroked her hair and continued to kiss the top of her head. As her crying slowed down and then eventually stop, I thought she had fallen asleep or at least gone into downtime but when I looked at her face, she was staring up at me. I leaned down and gently brushed her lips with my own, savoring the taste of them, still sweet as always but cool. I managed to pull away before things got carried away. I had something I had to ask her, something I needed to know.

"You always said you would never consider becoming a vampire. I knew you felt strongly against it. What changed your mind? You know I would have done it in a heartbeat if you had come to me and asked me."

"Eric, it wasn't until I thought that I might lose you permanently that I allowed myself to truly understand how I felt about you. After you left, I sat there and realized all the people in my life I had lost – Gran, my parents, hell, even my cat Tina. It terrified me to think that you might just as quickly leave my life as well."

I thought about all that she had lost in her brief human life, her parents when she was so young, her Gran being murdered, her first loving betraying her, people she thought were her friends using her. It made my blood boil to think how much suffering this young woman had endured in such a small span of time. But I didn't speak any of these things though I'm sure she knew what I was thinking. I let her continue.

"Once the fear of you not being there settled down, I asked myself why I was that worried about it. I realized that I couldn't imagine a life without you in it, Eric. Besides my Gran, rest her soul, you are the one person who has been there for me when I needed you, even without me asking. How many men would be willing to throw on pink lycra spandex for a woman, no matter how secure they are with their masculinity? How many bullets have you taken for me? I have so many memories of us, both good and bad, but one thing always stands out – you've always been there for me, making sacrifices for me. I realized it was time for me to make a sacrifice as well – either stay human and know eventually I would grow old and die or I could become a vampire and stay with you always. I asked Bill to change me first, only because I was scared I wouldn't have much time but he refused. Then, I thanked my lucky stars he did refuse because I knew if I could get Pam to do it, I would be tied to you through her always."

She paused, as if lost in thought.

"I regret it now, though. I wish I hadn't asked Pam to turn me."

"Why?"

"If I had stayed human, everything would be okay. I wouldn't be putting you and Pam through all this trouble."

"You are always trouble, my lover. Human or vampire, you are nothing if not trouble. We have come to expect and to except it and we love you for it." I whispered softly.

She laughed softly "Pam loves me? Now that's funny. I'll be sure to tell her you said that so she can have a good laugh as well."

"Do not doubt Pam's love for you Sookie. Pam has never turned another. She reserved that part of herself for someone she felt very special about, someone she knew she loved and would be willing to spend many years with."

She sighed and pulled herself back to my chest.. Several minutes past, although to me they seemed like a eon, until she finally spoke again.

"Love? Do you love me, Eric? Can vampires truly love? That's the first time I have heard you use that word since I've known you."

I pulled away from her a bit so that I could look into her eyes. How could she ask me this? Could she not tell how I felt about her? Could she not see what I hae done and continued to do for her because of how I feel? But maybe that was the problem, maybe where I always believed actions spoke louder than words, maybe it was the words she really needed to hear. And if there was ANY possibility I was going to lose her in a matter of days, I wanted to be sure she had no doubts how I felt.

"Sookie, my lover. Maybe I assumed that you knew how I felt because I felt that my actions spoke for themselves. To me love is respecting a person, being there for them, supporting them, protecting them. I have strove hard to make sure I have done each of these things for you the moment I knew I felt something beyond curiosity towards you. It is hard for me to speak words that humans seem to throw around so casually, because love was something that I had searched for many years, something I wanted to share with someone but couldn't find the right person. Love is a word that scares me, because it puts me in a vulnerable situation, but it is also something I have craved for my entire existence, as well as during my human life. But Sookie, listen to me," and at this, I placed my finger under her chin and looked directly into her eyes, allowing her to see exactly how vulnerable that word left me as red tears streaked down my face, "I am no longer scared of that word. I say those three words freely to you now and will continue to do so until we are parted by death. I Love You. If the words are what you need to hear, then I say them freely. I love you Sookie Stackhouse."

She raised her finger, stroking my face softly as she wiped a bloody tear away as I had done so many times and placed her finger to her lips, just as I had done so many times before. "I love you too, Eric Northman" she said softly and smiled. If I had a heart, it would have done flip flops hearing the sound of those words, words I had craved for so many lifetimes.

I looked at the clock on the bedside table and wanted to kill father time and drain him dry if he did indeed exist. I wanted to stay in this bed, with this woman for all eternity but I knew we had to go. I changed shirts (something about Sookie and silk shirts.. when the water works start, shirts get ruined, and now she cried blood) and together we walked hand in hand down to the den, where we found Pam in downtime. I expected some sarcastic comment when she saw us and my change of attire but instead she calmly stated "Eric, we have a problem."