A/N: Mr. Great's work has picked up even more; he's expected to pull 93 hours this week. So my updates will probably slow down. Please don't worry I have chapter 5&6 written, they are just waiting on him to get to. This story will not be put on hiatus, I will finish it, it just might take a little longer than we expected. Please bear with us. As always I hope you are enjoying the story, I apologize for the shortness of the chapters, but they just seem to end themselves, even when I'm not quite ready to be finished.
Warning: There is some lovin' in this chapter. It's very low key, not extremely graphic (that's the way I write them, I hope you aren't too incredibly disappointed) but still, if you are not 18 or older, please skip to the page break, this chapter opens up with a lemon.
Leave a review please. They make our day!
Falling Apart Chapter 4
He ran his hand through her silky brown tresses, tucking a loose strand behind her ear. He gently cupped her face with his massive hands, pulling her face up to look at him; He kissed her nose, her cheeks, her chin, and finally her perfectly plump lips. His hands moved at a slow pace, down her neck, to the tops of her arms, his thumbs lightly brushing the sides of her breasts, eliciting a soft throaty moan that ghosted across his lips, sending a pleasurable shiver down his spine.
He continued his exploration of her body, committing every curve, every scar, everything about her petite body to memory. He dragged his fingertips down her sides, tickling her sensitive skin, he paused at her hips grasping lightly, and he pulled her ever closer. She squeaked against him and he pulled back from her lips, smiling softly "You're so fucking beautiful." She blushed fiercely, a habit she hadn't been able to quit, even after spending 3 years in his arms, being loved and worshipped.
The scent of her lust hit him like a ton of bricks. He attacked her neck, kissing, nibbling, and sucking greedily. He could never get enough of her, he'd never tire of tasting her kiss, of pleasing her, and loving her in this most intimate of ways. He picked her up and she wrapped her legs around him tightly, grinding her jean clad center against his straining member.
"Couch" she muttered breathlessly
"Yes ma'am" he walked them over to the couch and lowered her onto the cushions
"Take off your shirt" he instructed "I want to see you" She complied, easily, readily tossing the garment on the floor.
A fire burned deep within him, a fire only she had ever been able to ignite. He made quick work of his cut-offs letting them fall where he stood and watched as she lifted her hips shimmying out of her skin tight jeans.
"Oh baby" he moaned deeply "no panties?"
"Just the way you like it babe." Her voice lowered into a sinful whisper "I need you, now. Make love to me Paul" Happy to oblige the request he lowered himself onto her, entering her with one quick thrust. They both groaned as he filled her so completely. "God I missed you Bella"
He set a quick pace and brought his mouth back to hers swallowing her moans as he slid in and out of her dripping wet heat. He braced himself with one arm and grabbed her hip with the other, pulling her impossibly closer, hitting her impossibly deeper.
Her moans turned to passionate cries and she clawed at his back. He ripped his mouth from hers, "look at me beautiful" her eyes shot open and bore into his with a fierce intensity he'd never tire from seeing " let go baby, come for me" Instantaneously her body began quivering beneath him and her face flushed deep red. She moved her hands gripping his shoulders tightly and came unglued, her walls clamping down impossibly tight on his throbbing member, milking him, coaxing forth his own orgasm. He came hard, shooting his hot seed deep into her womb. He collapsed on top of her utterly spent and nuzzled her neck. "Oh Bella"
FAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAF
He awoke with a start, the happiness he felt only moments before in his dream, was gone and he suddenly felt like he had come down with the flu. His body was aching, every muscle felt stretched to capacity, his bones felt as if they had been snapped and grown back incorrectly. His stomach felt disgustingly empty, his mouth was so incredibly dry, and his heart was so painfully heavy. His dream left him feeling so very alone, and he ached so desperately for her touch.
He missed her so fucking much. There just weren't enough words to describe the complete emptiness he felt at her loss. No way for anyone to really understand the violent way his emotions crept up on him, unannounced, tearing through him like a raging sickness. He had tried explaining to Sam and Jake that he just couldn't do this without her. Tried explaining that… it didn't matter, she was gone, and he was left to endure this storm alone.
"Paul..." Sam called through the door "Can I come in?"
He wanted to say no, the words his alpha and Jake had shouted at him, still burned in his mind and hurt, whether they were true or not they fucking hurt and he wanted nothing more than to never see them again. But, he wanted answers, and he was certain Sam had them.
"Come in Sam" The door creaked open slowly and Sam came in seating himself on the edge of the bed
"I'm sorry for the way things went down Paul, I regret saying what I did, but it has lead us to some answers. Still, I'm very sorry for what I said, what Jake said I can't imagine...
"No you can't Sam, you can't imagine, you never will" Hatred laced his voice "Just tell me what you found out and get the hell out of my house."
"Simple version, your wolf is dying." He paused a few moments to let that sink in for both him and Paul, "Old Quil is very concerned, our history shows that when an imprint dies the man dies too. Yet it would seem that you are proving us wrong. It's been a week, you are still living, if only barely, but your inability to phase, your inability to keep food down, your ability to disobey a command, it all points towards your wolf dying."
Paul's breath left him in a whoosh "You're telling me that the only two things about me that ever made any sense are both being ripped from me?"
Sam stared at Paul for a long time "Don't think of it like that. Maybe this is a good thing, you don't have any wolfy obligations anymore, and you're free to leave the reservation, free to go anywhere, to start over"
Paul shook his head vehemently "I. Am. Not. Leaving."
Sam sighed "I figured you'd say that. Look I get that all your memories of Bella are here, your home, the land, everything. I get it, but I don't think that it's going to do you any good to sit here and wallow. Bella wouldn't want that Paul. She'd want you to live. For her. She wouldn't want you to give up, she wouldn't want you to sit here and torture yourself. There is nothing wrong with remembering, there is nothing wrong with holding onto the good. I realize it's only been a week, and healing comes with time, but staying here, I don't think it'll be good for you."
"Let me decide what will be good for me Uley. You don't get it. Being here is the ONLY thing keeping me from completely losing it. You don't understand, you can't. Your imprint is still alive, I am grateful for that, but mine is not. My imprint is dead. My 'steel cables' were severed; my life was ripped from me the moment she died. But all my memories are here. Our house still smells like her, and it's comforting to me. If I left now, next month, next year, I would die, of that I am certain. I have to hold on; I have to stay here, surrounded by what is left of her. " he paused blinking his eyes to keep the tears at bay "I don't quite understand it all myself, I'm confused as fuck, I mean my imprint died, and you tell me I should have too, yet here I am. Maybe this is some test, maybe this is some fucked up alternate universe, maybe I'm already dead and this is my hell. Whatever the reason, whatever the cause, there is one thing I am certain of and that is that I need to stay here."
Sam smiled at Paul and laid a hand on his shoulder "I'll support you, with whatever decision you make Paul. You're still my brother and she was still my sister. We'll figure this all out together. But, you have to promise me Paul, that you won't give up, and if it does become too much that you will leave, wherever you are whatever you do Bella would understand, she wouldn't want you to stay somewhere that only served to hurt you."
Paul nodded and let the tears flow. He turned into Sam as the sobs overcame him for the hundredth time that week, and he let go, allowing himself this bit of comfort his brother provided. He didn't know what would come next, where he would end up, but he promised himself and he promised Bella that he wouldn't give up.
A/N: This chapter was originally twice as long as this, but Mr. Great and I decided it was best if it was split into two chapters. Hope you are all still enjoying this story. Let me know in a review!
Love to you all
-Mrs. great