A/N: Not affiliated with the book titles mentioned herein, the authors, or the publishing companies. This chap and next will be about the brothers. The pacing and delivery is somewhat different, since there's a different energy between Sasuke and Itachi than there is between Sasuke and Naruto. Sasuke clearly behaves differently around each man.

Beta: None

4. Brotherly Love

Sasuke usually got home ten minutes before Itachi did, same as every night. He'd spend a few hurried minutes showering and changing his clothes, and was normally in bed by the time he heard his brother's key twisting in the lock. Itachi would poke his head into Sasuke's room, ascertain that his brother was in one piece, then go off to eat and sleep himself.

Tonight, Sasuke got home and just sat on his bed, head in his hands. He felt, quite honestly, as if a train had been driven through the center of him. He was hurt. He was hurting so bad, just at the thought of not seeing Naruto every day. And the amazing admission of Naruto feeling attracted to him in turn somehow only made it worse. Bad enough being sent from the mountain, but to know his feelings were returned… If Naruto had continued to be unobtainable through ignorance of Sasuke's feelings, and no feelings of his own, well then okay. Sasuke knew he might –might- have gotten over his own feelings in time. That wasn't the case, though. Naruto had said he had feelings for Sasuke. He hadn't really needed the declaration either; he'd sort of known that something was going on between them on that mountain. He had hoped. And then the hope had become a reality. Then, before he could even think properly, he'd been sent away. It's my fault. Shouldn't have told him how I felt. Should have kept my fucking mouth shut.

God, he couldn't breathe. It hurt too much to breathe. He sucked in a breath anyway. Another. Then another, and then everything was coming out of him. His pain, his love…everything.

One more week. Double shifts were a bitch, but he had to take them once in awhile if he wanted to continue to put food on the table. Besides, anything was better than doing what he'd done before he and Sasuke had moved to Konoha. One more week and then it was first shift only for at least six weeks. Relief.

He'd be able to see Sasuke a little more. Kid stayed out all day, which was fine while he was at work, but he'd see about trying to spend some time with him once his shift changed. Kid was different these days. He couldn't quite put his finger on how he was different, though, seeing as he barely saw Sasuke. Eh, he sighed as he trudged up the stairs to his apartment. Probably my imagination. Sasuke would tell him if something was up, and the kid knew better than to get himself involved in anything that could jeopardize them.

-oOo-

Home. Keys tossed on the small bar island separating living room and kitchen, denim vest tossed in the opposite direction on the couch. He switched off the lights Sasuke unfailingly left burning for him as he passed from the living room to the hall, and down to Sasuke's small room. He expected to find the kid plastered face down in bed, same as he found him every night these days.

Not sitting on the end of it and crying in quiet, gut-wrenching sobs.

Itachi just stood there. A cold, psychological wind of terror washed over him and froze him where he stood. His senses kicked into overdrive even as he strode into the room, past his brother, and to the window. He twitched the curtains aside a bare half an inch to scan the street below. Nothing. Which was what he already knew; he'd know if he'd been followed, and would have spotted any lurkers. He turned back to Sasuke, ran his eyes over him searchingly, found no injury. Sat on the bed next to him, muscles tensed in rock-solid dread. "We're made," he stated.

Sasuke took it for the question it was. He had his forehead leaning on the heel of one hand, his other arm curled around his midsection. The tears dripped down his forearm or plopped onto his lap. He shook his head. No words, just the in-and-out hitching of his breath, the tiny wheezing sounds of his crying.

Not made. Okay. Itachi didn't relax. It just meant his mind pulled back slightly from the fight-or-flight focus it had been pressing toward. "Another incident like in the shop?"

Head shake again.

"Someone said something, then. An argument? Did you see something? Someone hurt you? What then?"

Negative head action for all questions but the last. No answers. Itachi finally stopped leaning toward Sasuke and looked down at his filthy work boots. He ran a hand through his hair. Took a breath. "All right. All right. Are you physically okay?"

Nothing, not even a head shake. Itachi took a moment to register just how bizarre this was. "Sasuke?" The kid never responded to shit like this. Sure, Sasuke internalized things, much as he himself did, but stuff never got to him. Sasuke didn't let it. Itachi had raised a resilient and practical young man, so whatever this was, it was serious. He felt that if Sasuke was crying harder, thrashing around, really boohoo-ing, maybe it wouldn't have been so bad. But this...this quiet, agonized, grudgingly-spent grief...it was worse. Something had seriously gotten to his kid brother. Itachi's bowels cramped in fear of the unknown, and he tried again. "Can you talk about it?"

A sniff. An effort to at least stop the crying. "No."

Itachi felt himself relax slightly at getting a word at last. He kept his voice low. "All right. Is there danger?"

"No…I'm going to bed."

Itachi would have to leave it at that, he saw. Sasuke turned and crawled up to his pillow, where he flattened himself in his customary sleeping position. Nothing else would be forthcoming, of that Itachi was certain.

He let his eyes run down his brother's body, till they stopped at his feet. After a moment, he unlaced and removed Sasuke's boots, frowning at the mud and dirt crusted into the treads. He likewise peeled off each stinking, sweaty sock. Sasuke didn't protest. Itachi got up then, but paused in the doorway, his hand on the light switch. He could both see and hear the faint hiccups of residual sobs. Swallowing hard, he turned off the light and made his way down to his room.

-oOo-

Not for a moment did Itachi believe Sasuke's assertion that nothing had happened. Despite his own necessary absence during the day, he and his brother were tight. They were all each other had, literally, from the moment Sasuke had been born. He'd raised the kid. For as long as Sasuke had been around, it had been just the two of them. No one else. No friends. No family. Nothing. Them against the world. For Sasuke to be brought to tears like how he'd just witnessed would mean that something had been able to get between them. One had to care about something in order for it to matter to them, didn't it? You couldn't be affected by what you didn't care about, a philosophy Itachi had weaned Sasuke on from day one. It was them and that was it. That's the way it had to be.

But that's not the way it was anymore, evidently. Something was up with Sasuke. Itachi's mouth tightened into a grim line as he realized that his brother had just lied to him for the first time in their lives. Didn't Sasuke think he could trust Itachi with whatever it was that had gotten to him? No, apparently not. And that hurt.

Sleep was a long time coming.

The next morning, Itachi bustled around the apartment, getting ready for work. He paused when he entered the kitchen. He always left the house around half past six, and Sasuke was usually already at the kitchen table, dressed and scarfing down breakfast. Listening to see if he could hear Sasuke moving around in his room, he found the apartment to be silent.

Last night, he'd come to the decision that to continue to ask Sasuke straight out for answers would be counterproductive to getting them. It was best to let Sasuke think he'd lost interest; there would be a better chance of catching whatever had intruded on their lives. And finding out what that was, was nothing short of imperative in Itachi's mind. Anything that affected Sasuke so strongly had the potential to fuck them both up royally. His new working hours couldn't come soon enough.

In keeping with his recent plan to play it cool, he poked a concerned head into Sasuke's room. The kid was still sprawled in bed. "Dude. You okay?"

As suspected, Sasuke was awake. He turned his head and regarded Itachi. "Yeah. Why?"

Why? Oh, I don't know, maybe because you were crying last night like I'd died, when you never cry about anything. "Just wondering. You're usually up and at 'em by now. You sick?"

"No." Sasuke turned his head away again.

"Maybe I should take you to the doctor."

"I'm fine, Itachi."

Itachi grit his teeth, then decided to just say it anyway. "Didn't seem fine last night."

A few seconds of silence. Then, "Saw a sad movie."

Itachi felt his insides burn with hurt at the lie. If that was the case, why couldn't you talk about it last night? You never go to the movies, bro. You don't think I know that? "Okay. Well, I'm off. Money's on the table."

"Thanks. Itachi?"

Itachi was already half way down the hall. He turned back quickly when Sasuke called him, hoping for the truth at last. "Yeah?"

Sasuke was turned toward the doorway again. He chewed his lip for a moment, thinking, then gave his head a small shake. "Nothing."

Itachi deflated. "I'll be late." He left soon after, snagging his keys and denim vest on his way out the door.

Sasuke turned onto his back at hearing the door locked. Early morning sunlight made senseless patterns on his ceiling. His practiced eye set about picking out shapes, habitually making sense of the senseless.

He'd been about to ask his brother if he'd ever been in love. That question would have alerted Itachi to the fact that there was someone in Sasuke's life, at which point his brother would have grilled him until he gave up Naruto's name. And then they would leave Konoha. Itachi would make sure they moved far, far away and never came back.

He'd die without Naruto.

But it also killed him to lie to his brother. He'd never lied to him, never kept things from him. His brother was his world. His entire world. At least, he had been before Naruto had come along. He felt unspeakably guilty for loving Naruto. As if he were betraying his brother. Itachi was the only person he'd loved, and that was the way it should be. He was weaned on the dogma that he and Itachi were a unit, dependent on no one but each other. He'd gone and broken that union by first caring about someone else, then lying to Itachi about it. And if Itachi ever found out, aside from packing their things immediately, he'd be crushed. Bad enough he was hurting. He didn't want Itachi hurting too.

So now what? He didn't know. He lay there, watching the shapes slowly fade from his ceiling.

Abruptly he remembered Naruto saying that he had feelings for him too. Happiness shot painfully through his body, making him hiss. Then a grin split his face. Naruto had feelings for him. Inappropriate feelings. "Naruto," he whispered. "Naruto, Naruto, Naruto…" His cheeks stung with heat, thinking of how Naruto had looked down at him the previous night. It had been on the tip of his tongue to confess the true depth of his own feelings then and there. He considered the words now, feeling his face go from stinging to burning. Then he said them out loud. "I love you."

He had to cover his face with his pillow, digging his teeth into his lip at feeling the heat spread all over him. He drummed his heels on the mattress in embarrassment, smothering himself with the pillow. "I love you!" he screamed into the pillow. The sound was muffled. He finally uncovered his face with a gasp, almost giddy.

An idea came to him.

Seeing Naruto that night in the store, Sasuke would never have considered approaching him. Then, when Naruto had saved him, he'd been struck by the negative emotions coming from the guy. Towards him. Even angry as Naruto had been, he'd impressed Sasuke simply because Sasuke took care not to interact with anyone and thus risk being the recipient of any emotions. Of course, now he knew why Naruto had been so pissed. In fact, he knew that Naruto hadn't been angry so much as aggrieved at the need to be in town shopping. Looking back on how everyone in the shop had stared, Sasuke thought that might have been a contributing factor as well. Certainly taking him home had been an added annoyance. But Naruto had done it. Just as he'd helped Sasuke when he hadn't really wanted to.

He'd been struck with the need to know more about him. He'd seen the license plate number while the ANBU agent had walked him to the truck. It probably would have surprised Naruto to know that Sasuke had seen quite a bit, down to the digital numbers on the gas pump Naruto had used, telling how many liters of gas he'd bought. Details. It had taken him a good week to finally hack the information he'd wanted. Once he'd had it, he'd spent several hours thinking up ways to thank the guy. He'd been nervous; strictly speaking, he wasn't supposed to approach people. Moreover, he was reasonably certain he'd have his head bitten off if he tried to thank the man.

It was just…he was tired of drifting on the outskirts of society. Here it was someone had taken notice of him long enough to help him out of a jam. True, he'd asked for the help, but still. He had to say thanks…no, he'd wanted to be in the guy's presence again. He wanted to see what would happen, if he'd get that jumpy feeling in his gut again, the one he'd had while riding in that truck.

He had nearly gotten his head bitten off. Which he'd found exciting and intriguing, as well as scary. He'd left the ramen, then had the brilliant idea to keep up the offerings. Maybe with more ramen the guy would be less…well, less of a prick. That was back before he'd known the reason for the prickishness, and discovering the fact that Naruto wasn't a prick. He was just used to being alone and undisturbed.

The idea he had now stemmed from the success of the ramen. If he could get past the antagonistic attitude with perseverance, wouldn't it stand to reason that he'd get past Naruto's belief that Sasuke should stay away with the same perseverance? If he had feelings for the older man, and Naruto in turn had feelings for him, then there was nothing to keep them apart. Nothing except Naruto's own belief that it was wrong.

And Itachi.

Sasuke blew out a breath that fanned his bangs upward. Well, what Itachi didn't know wouldn't hurt. He just knew in his gut that he and Naruto were meant to be. His lifestyle and Naruto's complimented each other. And he felt like they understood each other without having to speak. It was right…and he wasn't going to be sent away from what he wanted. What they both wanted.

The used bookstore smelled of old paper. Eyeballing the high stacks of yellow-paged books, Sasuke opted to browse on his own, instead of asking for help.

The aisles were narrow. He saw that the titles weren't alphabetized, but the sections were at least labeled. Every few shelves or so there would be a piece of ancient masking tape with a genre printed in black marker. He went past several aisles, until he found a dusty corner labeled Gay/Lesbian.

It made him hunch his shoulders just to be in that corner, but he hastily scanned titles until he found something he thought would fit his needs. It was wedged between several works of erotica and a huge volume titled The Big Penis Book. Sasuke tugged the book he wanted free, hugged it to his chest, and wrapped his arms around it to hide the title in case anyone was looking. There wasn't anyone else in the shop, but still. He kept his head down at the cash register, and swiftly shoved the book into his knapsack and out of sight once he'd paid for it. He left just as quickly.

-oOo-

He was unlocking the door to his apartment when his phone beeped. Pulling it out, he read the message: Cool?

Itachi's way of checking up on him throughout the day. His brother rarely, if ever, called. He relied on text messages, and their coded responses. They had words for being busy or in trouble, but he quickly punched in what he did everyday, the response that meant he was fine: As ice.

Home now, he locked himself into his room, and drew the book out of his bag. He sat on his bed with it, and scooted backward until he was leaning against the headboard, knees bent. He stared at the cover. A word jumped out at him.

Gay.

He supposed that was him.

He'd been called fag here and there by one jackass or another looking for a fight, and had brushed them off as idiots not worthy of a response, but he was now holding a book about homosexual practices. Sasuke realized he was trembling all over. Wetting his lips nervously, he slowly opened The Joy of Gay Sex.

Not that he was ever unaware, but coming home this time, Itachi gave his surroundings particular attention. He could see nothing out of the ordinary, no suspicious characters, no strange people going out of their way to avoid eye contact. He felt no abnormal chakra absences either. People went around with their chakra undisturbed; if he'd come across someone whose chakra was absent, he'd know then that they were actively suppressing it, and that would alert him to their questionable intentions. All seemed on the up and up.

As Itachi was crossing the street to his building, he saw the old man who owned the ramen shop come out and dump some trash. The old man waved to him. "Good evening!"

Itachi hesitated, looked behind him, then turned back around. He gave a cautious nod of his head. "Uh, yeah. Hey." Guy had never spoken to him before. Itachi did not like when strange people spoke to him as if he was their friend. It usually meant trouble.

"Is your brother ill?"

At mention of his brother, Itachi went still. As he slowly made his way back to the old man's side of the street, he quickly accessed what he knew of him. Nothing, really. Shop sold ramen. The guy had a daughter who worked with him. Shop was closed now, seeing as it was nearly midnight. Guy lived above the shop with his daughter. This was all information he'd gotten just from observing his surroundings every day. He could reel off the approximate working hours and occupations of anyone within a five block radius to where he and Sasuke lived. He knew who belonged in his neighborhood and who didn't. This guy was as permanent a fixture as the lamppost on the corner, not some new guy with a new store. Hence, his being an agent of some kind was highly unlikely. Still…

Running his eyes up and down the man's attire, Itachi could see he was wearing pajamas. Even had a night cap on. The expression on the old man's face was pleasant and nonthreatening, but Itachi well knew how people could kill without changes to their expressions. Measuring the distance between himself and the shop owner, Itachi opened his other senses wide, trying to sense an accomplice sneaking up on him. "My brother?" he said carefully.

"Yes, yes! He comes in everyday and buys two large ramen specials the moment my doors are open. He even asks that they be prepared beforehand so that they're ready as soon as I'm open for business. That way he can just pick them up without waiting. He hasn't been by-"

Itachi held up a hand, coming down somewhat from his defensive vigilance. "Wait, what? Sasuke doesn't eat that much ramen, not to my knowledge."

The old man set the black garbage bag into the can with a shrug, and covered it with the lid. The clanging sounds this made were loud on the quiet street. "He used to come in everyday, but now he only comes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. He didn't come in today. Just wondered if he was ill."

And today was Tuesday. Itachi looked behind where the man was saying a jovial good night, to where the shop hours were posted: 8 am- 8 pm. He finally crossed the street to his building, lost in thought.

-oOo-

What did Sasuke need with two large ramen specials that early in the morning? Every day? And now twice a week? A routine. The only routine Sasuke adhered to was to keep his bag on his back whenever he wasn't home, and to be out of the house as much as possible. What he did while he was out did not explain needing that much ramen. Itachi supposed now he knew where his brother's money was going. Sasuke himself had said he'd been eating out a lot, but ramen?

Once inside his apartment, after his keys and vest were ritually tossed, he walked down the hall to check on Sasuke, same as every night, and was brought up by the sight of his brother's door being closed. The light was on under the door, too. Sasuke was usually dead to the world by this time, and his door always remained open at night.

He knocked. "Sasuke?"

Rustling sounds. "Yeah?"

"I'm home."

"Okay."

"Surprised you're up. Wanna hang?"

"Uh, no. I'm going to bed now." More rustling. Sasuke sounded distracted, as if he were doing something while answering. After some seconds, the door unlocked –the doors were never locked in the apartment- and pulled open. Sasuke stood there with glassy eyes and a slightly red face.

Itachi took it all in, down to the nervously licked lips. He glanced casually behind his brother, looking for anything amiss in the room. "You good?"

"Uh huh."

"Any reason you're blocking the doorway?"

Sasuke seemed to realize he was doing just that and opened the door wider. He stepped back.

Itachi crossed the threshold, eyes sweeping for the slightest sign of a third person. He neither felt nor saw anyone, though, and so turned around to face his brother. "We don't lock doors."

"What? Oh, I know."

"Then why did you?"

"No reason."

Itachi noted the way Sasuke cracked his knuckles. Nervous. Hiding something. Enough of this bullshit. "Sasuke, I got a duty to see that we're safe."

"I know-"

"I'm in charge of you, I been raising you, and I know how best to ensure that we keep on being safe."

"Yeah, I know. I get that-"

"Part of us being safe is trusting each other. And If I can't trust you-"

"What? Of course you can-"

"What were you doing in here with the door locked?"

Sasuke was starting to breathe heavier, Itachi saw. He was getting nervous himself. Sasuke didn't answer.

"See, if you're doing something that will endanger us…"

"I'm not!" Sasuke yelled hotly. "You know I would never do anything to give us away."

Itachi walked over to Sasuke's closet and opened it. He moved the clothes aside while Sasuke cursed about his privacy, but saw nothing. Certainly no one hiding. "What I know is that you're lying to me, Sasuke. Seventeen years, and you've never lied to me. Do you have any idea how that makes me feel? No? Well here it is…I feel like shit. And I feel like cracking your skull in two." He took a breath. "Now… I need to know what the fuck you've been up to." He turned around and faced Sasuke. "Or this is going to get real ugly, real quick."

Sasuke folded his arms tightly over his chest. "You can kiss my ass. I'm not endangering us."

Itachi nodded, a tight, humorless smile on his face. "Fine. Gimme your bag."

"What-"

Itachi snatched the bag from where it sat on the floor at the foot of the bed. He threw Sasuke a warning look when his brother moved to snatch it back. Sasuke backed off at the look. Itachi carried the bag to the kitchen table. He quickly emptied it of its contents.

Sasuke spoke from behind him in a voice shaking with insult. "This isn't fair."

"Tough." He sorted through the contents and found nothing unusual. Laptop, one or two paperback crime novels, sketchpad, pencils, other art supplies, mp3 player, some money. His phone. Sitting at the table now, Itachi picked up the phone and accessed the call log.

Nothing. Nothing in messages either, but his own to Sasuke and his brother's replies. He set the phone aside.

Sasuke leaned against the fridge, arms folded again, and a sullen expression of anger on his face. Itachi ignored him for the moment, and opened the laptop.

Quickly scanning through the programs and hard disk, he found nothing suspicious. He also didn't find any new websites accessed when he pulled up the web browser. He checked thoroughly. Nothing had been deleted, and the cache hadn't been emptied. To his knowledge, his brother went online everyday, but it appeared as if Sasuke hadn't accessed the Internet in quite some time. He set the laptop aside after he'd closed it. Hesitated, and reached for the sketchpad.

Same pictures and doodles as always. Some were of people. Most were of isolated things that caught Sasuke's eye. There was one picture, though, that jumped out at Itachi.

It was of a lake. The detail of the drawing made the water seem real, seem to ripple in the faint breeze he could tell was moving the branches on the trees surrounding it. There was a dock, a small boat. It was sunset, he could tell, though Sasuke only ever used pencils, no color. There was no lake in Konoha. There was no lake near Konoha. Looking up, he caught an expression of…something…on Sasuke's face. "Where did you see this?"

"Nowhere."

Itachi thought he'd have a stroke. "So help me, if you lie to me one more time-"

"I said nowhere, okay?" Sasuke shouted.

He needed a moment to calm himself down. Bullying Sasuke would get him nowhere, and yet he was keenly aware of just how fucked the situation was becoming. "Sasuke. Look…I know you. I trained you. Art isn't natural to you, it's a skill I forced you to pick up, same as your other skills. You don't draw what you don't see. Now I'm going to ask you one more time. Where did you see this lake?"

Sasuke chewed the inside of his cheek, moving one foot back and forth in agitation. "I saw it in my head."

Itachi pursed his lips and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Get out of my sight."

"Can I have my-"

"If you're still here three seconds from now, I'll be putting your face through this table."

Sasuke stalked to his room. Itachi switched to rubbing his face with his hands. He had a headache.