Yay! I updated (I fell into Awakening, sorry about that. BUT...Awakening stuff to come as well as original campaign stuff! (When I finish Awakening, if not sooner))!!!

This one's a bit slower but...in a good way. :D

I'm always open to ideas, suggestions, comments etc! Please review!

I don't own any of the things parodied or referenced in the following.

The 'Most Powerful Sorcerer in the World' Contest

They had all gone to the fair, though they had lost people along the way: Zevran had seen some old Crow buddies, and, after determining that they weren't going to kill him, was catching up on months of Crow gossip (who would have thought that assassins would have gossip, Wynne wondered, before belatedly looking at Leliana…). Sten had become distracted by the contests of strength, which he had entered in order to win the strange, anthropomorphized representations of animals that they offered as prizes. (Doubtless Leliana would tease him later, but they looked so…alluring, good company for a warm bed on a cold wintery night). Shale and Morrigan had gone off together to gaze at 'shinies' and Oghren had long ago disappeared into a tavern.

That left her here with Leliana, the Warden, and Alistair. Wait, why had she stayed with the group? Wynne scrunched up her face in disgust, but concluded that it had been by her own stupidity that she had stayed, and she was somewhat interested in the results. Although her magic wasn't as flashy as some, and she would never use it frivolously, she did want to observe the contest. The spectators didn't seem as hostile to magic as they normally would, and she wondered if any maleficars were afoot.

A lot of the competition's entries seemed to be using illusion magic. They were combined to a circle roughly eight feet across; anyone casting outside that circle forfeited. Leliana and Alistair were cheering for the Warden rather loudly as she cast some impressive elemental spells (real spells, none of that trickery) and cut open her arm with a blade, only to heal herself. Wynne smiled. The child was much improved at magic, and this was a real opportunity to demonstrate that magic could be used for healing as well as destruction. Wynne had no doubt, after the mighty tempest she had summoned—which with hair-fine control, she had kept within the circle—that she would win the prize. Especially considering her competition. That Harry Potter kid had been dreadful, flicking his wand everywhere and muttering random words. And whoever that Harry Dresden was, he really needed a shave, a haircut, and a fashion sense.

"Cheers to the Grey Warden!" the announcer called. The audience burst out into delighted applause.

"You were great!" Alistair said, as she came back to her seat, placing a lazy kiss on her cheek.

Leliana tittered. Wynne averted her eyes. Watching Alistair behave like a literal puppy (nevermind the eyes—the slobbering was what she found offensive) hadn't yet lost its charms. And by charms, she meant, its power to dismay and traumatize her.

"Hey! Cut it out!" the Warden said as Alistair tried to cop a feel. "I want to see who goes last."

"Our final contestant is the dreaded sorceress Flemeth herself! Flemeth once took the form…" the announcer started explaining the legend in his most dramatic voice.

Wynne and Leliana's eyes met. "It's good that Morrigan is gone," Leliana said. "She would doubtless call this fraud out for slandering her mother's name so."

"I agree," Wynne said. "This contest is full of con-artists who think that a fancy set of robes and a large staff make them more credible! And the names! 'First Enchanter Josephus?' As though we are to believe that famous figures have come to life before our very eyes!"

"Uh, normally I would agree," Alistair said, and there was something in his tone that made them give him their attention, "but…that looks startlingly like THE Flemeth."

They had heard, of course, the story of meeting Morrigan's mother. Their eyes slid to the Warden, who nodded, blood running cold. "It's a good thing Morrigan went shopping," she said softly, as though Flemeth could hear them.

"Not for our budget," Alistair muttered under his breath.

"What…should we do?" Leliana asked.

The Warden drew in a breath. "Maybe she thinks this is just for fun. Anyway, we should prepare for the worst, but…wait and see. After all, Flemeth can't have known that we came to Denerim for the fair; she would never have made it here in time. Maybe…" although her breath was stifled, since Flemeth knew magic that no one had mastered…"maybe it's a coincidence."

"Or maybe we're all dead," Alistair snarked.

Tense and alert, they watched as Flemeth signaled to someone in the crowd. Two men lugged a wooden chest into the middle of the circle. Flemeth herself seemed dwarfed by the large ring, standing two feet away from the chest. She didn't look hostile, or angry, or intimidating. Just…determined?

They waited, poised to spring forward and attack at the least sign of treachery. Spells hanging from their lips. Swords in hand. Bows alert. The entire audience waited with them, silent and eager.

"Maybe she's going to attack the chest," Alistair whispered. "Maybe this is her idea of sport, and she's just here to—"

They all flinched back as she uttered a single word. But, instead of fire and ice devouring the chest, or an army of undead pouring from it, or anything, they heard a slight click.

The lid of the chest popped upon. Leliana shrieked at the noise and movement and would have fired, if the Warden's hand hadn't interposed…the last thing they needed was to draw attention to themselves!

But thankfully, others in the crowd had had the same startled reaction. Now, running through the silence were shocked murmurs, "I thought that was impossible?" "But only rogues can open chests!"

After a few confused minutes, someone started clapping. Then someone else. Then the entire audience! Flemeth was named the 'Most Powerful Sorceress in the World'. The contents of the chest were revealed to be: a liferock and a couple of metal shards, held triumphantly aloft by the crafty apostate as she donned the Golden Mantle.

The Warden sprang up from her seat. "Where are you going?" Alistair asked, confused.

She turned to him, all business. "I have got to go look at Morrigan's grimoire," she said, steely determination in her voice.

"Hey! Wait for me!"

"Wynne, are you alright?" Leliana asked as Alistair pursued the Warden. Wynne shook herself out of her daze. She noticed that tears had been running down her cheeks.

"I'm fine child. It's just not every day that you see such a splendid feat of magic," Wynne said, feeling very humble. "At last, I can die knowing that the Maker has given this gift to me."

Leliana looked very alarmed. "But…not right now, right?"

"Of course right now," Wynne snapped. "Do you have eyes, girl? Did you not see her open the chest with her magic?" Leliana's eyes became the size of Shale's, and Wynne realized what she meant. "Oh, of course not, child," she said, wiping her eyes. "I'm sorry. I'm merely…it's just so miraculous; I forgot everything for a moment!"

Loud screams and other sounds associated with general panic finally hit them. Wynne and Leliana looked up to see a huge dragon towering over the crowd! "Oh, shit," Wynne swore. The dragon prepared another blast of flame—

Dragon Age: Origins has stopped working

Windows can check online for a solution to the problem.

— Check online for a solution and close the program

— Close the program

— Debug the program

\/ View problem details

;p I couldn't resist this.