Here we go lovies! Chapter 4, chapter 4! I'll leave a note at the end of this chapter about updates and this story going forward. Take a peek!
Disclaimer: I do not own twilight.
Chapter 4
1950
Over the next few decades, I learned what life as a vampire entailed. The speed, hunting, and crazy good sensory skills were just the beginning.
I'd grown much closer with the Denali coven, even adopting their name after a decade to make things easier, image-wise. We'd decided to have Tanya and Kate act as mine and Garrett's adopted siblings, Carmen and Eleazar being our parents. Garrett and Kate didn't like having to act as siblings but we were almost never around the general population anyway so it wasn't like they had to be conservative all the time.
Garrett and I looked the most alike and with Carmen and Eleazar having darker features overall, they could pass as being young parents, having had us at a young age. Kate and Tanya had such striking differences, acting as biological siblings seemed a little too suspicious.
Letting go of the Hale name was both difficult as well as a relief. Every time I heard someone call me Isabella Hale I would think of Rose and my mother. I never wanted to forget them but I also couldn't keep living in the past.
So after a while, Tanya approached me about changing my name to Isabella Denali and I agreed, knowing in my heart it was for the best.
Time went by both quickly and slowly. Time wasn't really a term I used anymore. In the beginning, I found it difficult to keep myself preoccupied, especially once I found out that we don't sleep any more.
What does one do with unlimited time and little to no basic needs to attend to?
Read.
I read a little of everything, all different genres. From science and non-fiction, to classic romance, it didn't matter. I seemed to be reading my way through Alaska's entire library collection.
In just a few years.
It was both fascinating and frustrating. On one hand, I loved being able to learn so much so quickly. While I had gone to school in my human years, I always felt as though the education was meant for the boys in the class. Women were often regarded as homemakers and not needing education to have a life. They would have men to survive off of.
It often felt like the teachers believed girls wouldn't be needing education, so why teach it to them?
It always angered me because I loved to learn. I loved going to school and finding out new tidbits of information that I could store away.
Now, I was zipping through multiple books a day, ones that would have taken me weeks to finish when I was human. It was amazing.
But annoying, too. What happened when I finished all the books Alaska had to offer? The time would come, surely. What did I do then, go to another state for more books?
When I brought up my concerns with the others, they just rolled their eyes and mumbled "nerd" under their breath.
Whatever.
I'd also taken up learning to play different instruments. Piano had always been my favorite when I was human and it still was now. It was so much easier to learn new pieces as a vampire though. Now, I could compose and nail down a new composition in a matter of hours.
I had gotten pretty good at it, too. Good enough that instead of using a keyboard to practice on, Tanya bought me a beautiful baby grand piano for in the dining quarters.
It was absolutely beautiful, and all mine.
I loved playing because it was like an unlimited source of something to do. So what if I read through almost every book in the library? I could at least always have something to do when playing the piano. It was an unlimited source of pastime.
I also learned how to work with my shield, well part of it. I was able to manipulate the physical portion somewhat but I hadn't discovered how to work with my mental one, if I even had one.
Practice was really hard for me. It required a lot of strength and concentration, something I had little of. I'd mainly been practicing strengthening my shield, moving it around. I had practiced lifting it, but that ended pretty poorly.
"I wonder how we can test the mental shield, see if you encompass both that and a physical one?" Eleazar questioned one afternoon during my training session.
I had taken to daily trainings with each member of the cover. I'd either learn how to work with my shield, get tips about different things such as best locations to hunt and when, or I'd be taught combat skills so I could always protect myself if a stubborn vampire were to cross my path.
I liked the fighting portion, but I didn't really understand why I had to learn. Garrett was adamant though, saying I had to be able to protect myself.
"How so?" I countered Eleazar's question, taking a small break from stretching my physical shield around, testing its limits. I could move it around, have it cover my coven, but I was having a hard time completely lifting it. This was something Eleazar wanted to see if I could do. He thought my ability to overcome newborn lust had to do with the fact that my shield was protecting me. In order to test this theory, I had to lift it completely.
"Well, we can test your physical one pretty simply. We just throw something your way or have Kate grab a hold of you to shock you. That haze I see around you, however...I know there's something else to your talent, I just can't tell if it has something to do with a mental shield or not...I wonder…" he trailed off.
"What?" I said simply. I was never one for patience and Eleazar was always one to test me.
He grinned at me, clearly aware of my short temper, but continued on.
"Well, we know another vegetarian coven pretty close to us. A few of their members have impressive talents, some mental. I wonder if maybe we-,"
"Oh come now, we just got Isa! Let her acclimate to her surroundings, maybe even travel a bit, before we go throwing her into the arms of more vampires," Tanya scolded from behind me. She was usually a part of my training sessions, liking to oversee and add comments here and there.
She was like an older sister to me, always nagging but only because she cared so much.
The girls had taken to calling my Isa for short. They had tried Bells but it hurt too much to hear seeing as that's what Rose had called me.
I looked at her in question. Just got me? It had been over three decades since my change!
"Just wait until you enter a city full of humans, hon. Yes, you have amazing control, the best I've ever seen, but you haven't tested your strength around humans yet. We should get you comfortable with that before heading off to meet our friends, yes?" She strutted over to me, throwing her arm around my shoulder.
"We also don't know what control you have over your shield. Having more answers and practice before we head to the other coven seems like a better idea to me."
I nodded in understanding. Sure, I felt like I was ready, and it would actually be kind of fun to meet more of our kind, but I hadn't tested my limits in relation to humans. I would never be able to live with myself if I were to slip and hurt an innocent person because I was hasty to meet the others.
"Good, now let's keep working with the shield you can manipulate," Tanya stated. She nudged me lovingly and then walked back to where she had been standing, continuing to observe my session.
"Alright," I agreed, turning back to Eleazar with determination. He nodded assertively, calling for Kate softly. She easily heard him, speeding to stand in front of me hastily.
She liked being able to use her gift for once. Usually, she would only shock people at a low level, just a little nudge or spark. She usually did that to Garrett when she got mad, which was hilarious.
Using her full strength could be deadly, though, so she never really practiced it.
With me, we'd learned, she could turn up the strength. The first couple of times were difficult. I could feel her gift, but not as much as the others apparently. When she shocked me with a higher voltage, it stung but didn't knock me on my feet like it would for others.
Now, I had learned how to strengthen my shield, sealing it completely before reaching out to grab her hand. She clasped on to mine, giving me a short nod before lowering her head.
Kate could use her gift with no contact at all, but we'd learned that by actually touching the subject, the strength of her gift could be amplified. I felt a warm hum throughout me, more ticklish than anything. Kate glanced up at me before scrunching her brows together in concentration.
I felt the hum grow a little hotter, more irritating than before. I pushed back, focusing on my shield and trying to maneuver it to harden and cover me completely. The harder I concentrated, the less I felt the hum until finally, I didn't feel a thing at all.
It took all my concentration, usually. I was hoping the more I worked with is, the less I would have to really focus. That way, I could just throw it around wherever I wanted and easily protect those I needed to.
Right now, I could just barely protect myself fully.
Kate gasped, letting go of my hand and resting hers on her knees, taking a deep breath. I knelt down beside her, rubbing her shoulder gently.
"You alright?" I asked softly, worry lacing my voice. She raised her head and grinned at me, nodding before she stood and stretched out her limbs.
"Damn, that felt really great. That was full strength, Isa! That would've put most in a freaking coma, girl. Did you feel a thing?" She kept the grin on her face, shaking out her fingers and arms in excitement, her platinum hair flying around due to her aggressive wiggling.
I grinned back at her, feeling the happiness role off of her and letting it embrace me. I was pretty damn proud now.
"At first I did but when I really focused, it eased into practically nothing! Just a little hum of heat." I was vibrating happily, so excited that I had a breakthrough with my talent.
We'd been practicing for a while, exploring my gift and seeing what I could do with it. I had made some progress but having Kate use her gift to the fullest extent and not being able to even really feel it…that was pretty great.
"Hey, good job! But can your shield protect you from this!" Garrett lunged at me from behind, trying to sneak up and attack me. I easily stepped out of the way before he made contact, pushing my shield so it was only about an inch from my body. He lunged again only to come in hard contact with an invisible layer surrounding me.
I grinned at his tightlipped expression.
I loved winning.
My shield was able to protect me from physical attacks, as well as from the gifts of others. I'd learned how to expand my shield out just a fraction of an inch in order to cover me completely, but that's about as far as I could stretch it so far. It could only last a few seconds or so, though.
Either way, Garrett couldn't sneak past it so it was a win for me.
"Alright, alright. Enough of that, Garrett. It's not combat time, we're trying to focus on the shield," Eleazar scolded, pushing him lightly on the shoulder and making his way to me. My shield faded out slowly, allowing him to grab my hand and pull me over to where we had been practicing prior to Garrett's sneak attack.
I placed my hands on my hips, a newfound energy coursing through me. I was ready to make leaps, take chances, and really get to know my shield more.
"We've been working on strengthening your shield for some time now, which you seem to have gotten the hang of. I think we can put that on the back burner for now. If you practice with Kate some more and work on stretching it further and further from yourself, I think you have a pretty good grasp of manipulation and strength.
"What I'm really curious about is if you'd be able to lift it completely. I'm wondering if…if your shield is protecting you from your newborn instincts? Or if maybe you lift it, this haze will alter in some way…maybe you have two gifts but only one can be in use at a time? I wonder…" Eleazar drifted off, his face scrunched and curious. He often did this when talking about my shield. He loved hypothesizing and trying to understand it, especially since it was unlike anything he's encountered before.
I just wanted fucking answers.
I tried to be patient with Eleazar. Let him mumble to himself and pace a little bit, but I finally got fed up.
"Uh, okay, so is there something I should practice now or are we done for the day?" I ask, looking at Tanya and Eleazar with my lips pursed, impatient. Tanya looked at me in annoyance, giving me her best big sister look. I just shrugged in response, rolling my eyes.
"Eleazar is trying to figure this out. You should be a little more patient with this. In relation to how long we can survive, we really haven't had any time at all to analyze and understand what your gift is. Give us some time."
I bit my lip, looking to Eleazar with apologetic eyes. I was impatient with myself, with how many more questions than answers there seemed to be. That's not anyone's fault though, just the lack of time and knowledge of this topic.
"You're right, Tanya. Sorry, Eleazar…I just hate not knowing, you know? Having so many questions and really no answers…" He nodded in understanding, still a little sidetracked with his mumbling and thoughts. He probably didn't even hear my rude comment before.
He turned to me suddenly, seeming to come to a conclusion about something. I stared at him, startled, not prepared for the sudden movement and determination that spread across his face.
"I want you to try and lift your shield, Isa. Not just expand it but really remove it completely from yourself. Do you think you can do that?" The rest of the coven had gathered at this point, watching from all around me. I tried not to let the attention get to me but I couldn't lie, I was a little nervous.
"Uh, yeah, I can try I think," I responded quietly, glancing around again and then shaking my head clear and closing my eyes.
I took a deep breath, trying to think of how I would go about doing this. Do I just say…shield go away? Seems unlikely that would work. Maybe if I try to physically push? How do you even do that? I opened my eyes warily, not really sure how to go about even trying to remove my shield altogether.
I looked at Eleazar, raising my shoulders up in an unsure shrug.
"Just concentrate, Isa. Think about your shield as being an elastic band. You can stretch it a little, we know that, but think about removing it completely. Like taking a hair tie and lifting it off your wrist."
I nodded, closing my eyes again and concentrating hard, trying to visualize the image he was talking about.
Elastic band, stretching, removing it completely. Stretch, stretch, stretch…
My teeth grit together with the force of trying to release my shield. I growled lowly, giving it everything, all my energy.
Nothing.
My body slumped a little in defeat, angry with the anticlimactic scene.
"Hey, it's okay. You can't expect to get it right away, it'll take some time. Practice, practice, practice." Tanya stepped forward, coming to stand next to me and smiling encouragingly.
Practice…and time. Ugh, two things I always struggle with.
…
"UGH!" I yelled, throwing my hands into the air and stomping my foot childishly.
I was standing in the yard again, still trying to remove my shield. I'd made little to no progress in the few days that had passed since I first tried lifting it. So far, I'd figured out how I could lift it, I just hadn't executed it.
I was growing more and more impatient by the second.
"Hush, now, Isa. You're almost there. You've said you can feel your shield now…actually grasp it in a sense. Really focus and give this all your energy. Take the shield, the force you can feel and push it. Throw it." Eleazar was circling me, his hand on his chin and head tilted like he was examining me.
I growled in frustration. That's what I've been trying to do! My fists clenched in aggression, trying to not explode on Eleazar, who was just trying to help.
"I think she needs some pressure. Like, a real-life push that could possibly break this barrier between her and her shield." I turned to Kate, unsure of what she meant by that. What, like a real threat? How were we supposed to make that happen?
"Ow!" Tanya yelped, stumbling back in shock. I turned to her, confused as to what happened, when I heard Garrett shout out in pain as well.
"What the hell, Kate!" Garrett glared at his mate, frustration staining his expression. I turned to Kate, totally confused now.
Carmen cried out now, too. Her little yelped making me anxious. What was Kate getting at?
"Kate, what-ow!" Eleazar barked out when the shock Kate sent his way hit him suddenly.
"What are you doing?" I questioned, annoyance lacing my tone. I didn't like this practice technique at all.
"Trying to motivate you," Kate mumbled out, a smirk crossing her face. I squinted my eyes at her, expanding my shield out to try and cover my coven as best as I could. Kate had now used her gift on every member, all of them grimacing in discomfort but not being seriously injured.
I could feel each member being covered, the shock warming my system like it had before. It was incredibly difficult for me to stretch my shield over everyone, something I hadn't really done before. I was able to shelter everyone, their faces relaxing to normal the second they were in contact with it.
"Interesting…is this what it feels like for you, Isa? A slight hum of warmth? I can feel it!" Eleazar was geeking out, happy to have gained a little bit more knowledge about my shield.
I couldn't respond, all my focus going to my shield and making sure no one would feel Kate's shock. Her and I were staring at each other, gauging what the other would do next. I know she's trying to help me, to push me, but it was frustrating that we hadn't at least talked about this with the others.
She held my gaze as she heightened the strength of her gift on the others. I felt the warm hum turn hotter, becoming really uncomfortable. The others seemed to feel it too. I heard them all hiss and groan out, my shield not able to protect them all from the strength of Kate's gift. I ground me teeth, my hands shaking slightly with the effort I was exerting.
Many things happened at once. Kate heightened her shock even further, making it impossible for me to cover everyone and have them fully protected. I hadn't pushed my shield this hard before, so it was pretty weak still.
Everyone gasped a little, Tanya heaved over blinking rapidly. Eleazar was clutching Carmen, who was leaning into him with a pained expression.
Garrett was cussing his mouth off.
I growled in frustration, annoyed that I was able to protect myself but only minorly shelter my loved ones.
I hissed out, which turned to a low gravely yell. My entire body was vibrating, wound tight with focus. I thought about my coven. How much I wanted to protect them from Kate. I thought about Eleazar and what he had said before; lifting the rubber band. Removing it from myself like a hairband.
I clamped my eyes closed, putting every last drop of effort I had to offer into pushing my shield.
Push, Isabella. Push.
I gasped loudly, my shield ripping away from me with so much force, I was nearly knocked off my feet. It felt like a part of my soul was being torn from my being, like Velcro tearing away.
I grimaced, trying to embrace this and allow my shield to flow out and wrap around the others. I was only slightly aware that the others were now able to stand completely, the pain evidently lessening some.
I, on the other hand, was having a hard time staying upright. I hissed again, pushing harder in an effort to see how far and long I could lift my shield.
I was aware of the burning of my throat, the lust I felt for blood. It was much more powerful than I'd ever experienced. Not just an annoyance but more persistent and…raw. I felt ravenous.
I tried to push those thoughts away, focus on my shield and testing its limits. The burn was becoming too overwhelming, the ache tearing me apart. I growled out, opening my eyes and whipping around in an effort to tame my bloodlust.
My shield snapped back into place, hitting me roughly and causing me to stumble slightly. My lack of focus must had caused it to slip back to me. The burning in my throat lessened significantly, turning to the normal ache rather than the overpowering rawness I had just felt.
I took a staggering breath, unsure of everything that had just happened. I stood abruptly, a little surprised that I had been in a crouching position and not sure how that even happened. I looked up, seeing my coven had gathered together and were standing somewhat defensively a few feet away from me.
I glanced around, still taking unnecessary breathes to calm myself. They all looked surprised and…a little scared. My eyebrows furrowed together. What had happened?
Eleazar took a step forward, coming to stand right in front of me. He placed his hands on either side of my cheeks, looking at me with worry.
"Are you alright, Isa?" He asked, his face adorning tension from the situation that had just unfolded.
I nodded, cupping the back of my neck and trying to shake off the tiredness I was now experiencing.
"That was…well that was something," Tanya mumbled, coming over to me too and seeing for herself that I was alright. I was rubbing my temples, trying to regain more control over myself. I was feeling lightheaded and crazy tired, like I hadn't been hunting in a month.
"I did it, though. I think I lifted my shield," I mumbled out, finally able to speak. The coven was gathered around me, all wanting to see if I was okay.
"Hell yeah you did! One second I'm in crazy pain and the next, I'm totally fine but you were acting like a crazed newborn!" Garrett threw his arm around me, squeezing tightly and looking at me seriously, silently asking if I was alright.
"I'm okay, I'm okay," I insisted, wanting to get back to what had just happened and not focus on how I was feeling. I'm fine, now what did he just say?
"A newborn? Was that what the crazy burning in my throat was from?"
"Yeah, and you got all weird and predatory. Like you were gonna pounce on me and take a fuckin' bite!" Garrett was shaking his head, his arm still wrapped around my shoulders in brotherly sign of affection. He was crazy protective and acted as a big brother to me.
Kate had told me once that it was because I was the newbie and he'd never been around for someone to be changed and accepted into the coven. He had met up with Kate and Tanya many years ago, who then converged with Carmen and Eleazar years later. I was the first to enter the coven through a change initiated by them.
Which apparently made it okay for him to be crazy protective and annoying.
"So it looks like we were correct in thinking your shield is what is protecting you from the newborn instincts but I'm still a little confused about what the haze is…" Eleazar was pacing again, deep in concentration.
"The haze stayed put? Nothing changed?" I questioned, removing Garrett's arm and walking over to Eleazar, wanting his full attention. He stopped pacing and faced me, giving me what I wanted.
"Nothing. It seems the threat of Kate against the family pushed you to release your shield entirely in order to protect us more. Your shield isn't strong enough to cover us all yet, apparently."
I hummed in agreement. So I had to work on strengthening my shield. Worst case scenario, I'd be able to protect my family members, but it would leave me incredibly vulnerable. I wouldn't last long if there was a threat and I had to lift my shield completely off myself.
I'd have to practice expanding my shield and covering more distance overall.
Kate cleared her throat from behind Tanya. She peeked around her shoulder, giving me a wary look. I glared back, still peeved at her antics.
"What! It worked!" She mumbled out, raising her hands defensively when Carmen and Tanya shot her glares.
"Yeah, but a little warning or communication would've been nice," Garrett muttered, crossing his arms and looking at his mate with scolding eyes.
"Hey, if we had every detail planned out, it might not have worked. I thought just winging it would be best. I wouldn't have actually seriously injured any of you," she said in exasperation. I rolled me eyes, avoiding her entirely.
Sure, it worked, but I didn't have to be happy about it. Her lack of communication about this situation was a little irrational, even if it was successful. I hated the whole ordeal. Seeing my family in pain and not doing anything about it…it brought back bad memories regarding Rose and my mother.
I scowled, thinking back to those painful memories and the tragedy my family endured.
"Hey, Isabella, I'm sorry. I should have checked with you, talked about it at least. I'm sorry." Kate came over to me, wrapping her arms around me quickly, giving me little time to react.
I stayed put, not moving to embrace her back, but not pushing her off either. She hugged me tighter, shaking me a little in the process.
"I'm sorry, really." She tried again, this time picking me up entirely and shaking me roughly, my feet swinging back and forth forcefully. I tried to hide my grin, unable to stay serious with her.
She set me down, looking at my expression and relaxing slightly, clearly happy the tension was broken.
I smiled softly at her, grabbing her hand and squeezing in reassurance.
"Just...a little warning maybe? It was frustrating. Seeing everyone in pain like that…I didn't like it. I felt helpless…brought back some shitty memories."
Kate nodded, worry radiating off of her in waves.
"I didn't even think about that, Isa. I'm really sorry."
I nodded, shaking it off and smiling at her again to show I was just annoyed by the situation, not actually really mad.
"Okay, so we'll take a break from lifting your shield. There's really no reason to do so if you work on strengthening and expanding your shield instead. We don't want to make you go through the pain and effort of lifting your shield unless necessary.
"Some positives can be taken from this, though. We know for certain that your shield is protecting you from your newborn instincts, it's clear that it's incredibly powerful and you'll have a lot to practice…but the most important thing might be that you clearly really love us, huh?" Eleazar finished his rant, turning to look at me with a teasing expression.
Garrett barked out a laugh and picked me up, throwing me over his shoulder and running around like a crazed animal.
Kate was running after us, giggling and chanting, "she loves us, she loves us", over and over again. The others just stayed where they were, laughing.
I couldn't help but yelp out my own giggles, letting Garrett prance me around the house multiple times even though we both knew I could throw him several yards away from me at any second.
I really did love these people, more so than I ever thought possible. I couldn't help but feel a slight pang of guilt, though.
I bet Rose would've loved them, too.
…
More time passed, I learned more about my talent, as well as how to interact with humans a bit. It was much harder than I had anticipated. The scent of animals was good, depending on the animal. The smell of humans? Delightful.
They were warm and sweet. The sound of their light heartbeats se easily heard through their thin layers of skin.
It was torture having to interact with them. To smile, and hear their hearts accelerate. To grasp their hands in a polite gesture and feel the blood flowing beneath. I was so thankful for my shield, otherwise I wasn't sure I'd be able to bear it.
The others were so proud of me the first time I travelled into the small town of Healy. It sucked, sure, but I didn't kill anyone so that's a win in my eyes.
Tanya and Kate had taken me to a small outfitters located there in an effort to spruce up my wardrobe. Fashion was much different here than in New York, especially now that it was 1950. I was used to wearing long, heavy dresses with tattered lace and nothing exposed.
Now, due to the colder climate during some of the months and women being able to actually show a little skin, I was able to wear pants without being looked at oddly. Pants!
I had walked into the outfitters and held my breath for the majority of the time while Kate and Tanya picked out all my clothes. They made me go up to the counter in order to socialize a bit, which was difficult, but bearable.
I had done it. I'd been in near proximity of a human and he was still alive. Fist pump!
After the first encounter, I was able to travel more, which made time pass quickly. We went all throughout Alaska at first, which wasn't very densely populated, but then expanded out to near-by areas such as different territories in Canada and even into California.
Everywhere I went, I thought of Rose. There wasn't a day that passed where I didn't feel a pang of grief, the slight ache in my still heart due to the fact that I'd never see my sister again. That I had gotten another chance at life but she hadn't. Some days, it was almost too much to bear.
"Isa, hon, I know it's difficult. Just remember, the man that did this to you, to her, suffered. You did what you could. You couldn't have stopped it," Tanya consoled one night when the memory of Rose became too difficult to keep in.
"But I could have! I could have. I just let her go. I knew something was off about him...but I just let her leave…how could I do that…?" I heaved, unable to shed a tear any longer but still feeling the pain.
"No. You know better. Your sister, from what you've told us about her, was as stubborn as you. If she truly felt being with that evil man would save you and your mother, she wouldn't have changed her mind. She was her own person, Isabella. If she was as stubborn as you are, I have no doubt that you couldn't have stopped her," Kate interjected as she slid up next to me, Tanya on my other side.
We had been hunting during one of our trips to Montana. Apparently there were some bobcats here that Kate loved to hunt on special occasions.
We were running, laughing, teasing one another along the way. For the first time in a while I felt as though I had friends, sisters even. It was that thought that made me feel guilty. Like I had just replaced Rose with new sisters. I felt sick.
"Will this pain ever go away? Or am I doomed to feel this way for all eternity?" I blubbered on.
"Cut it out, Isa. You know the pain will lessen. You'll always remember her, it would be impossible for you to forget. But would she want you wallowing around, moping about her death 30 some years later? No," Tanya chided.
"Really, Tanya, a little harsh?" Kate muttered to her. Tanya responded by sticking out her tongue.
I couldn't keep the giggle down. That seemed to be a common response in this cover. Even something I did when I was human. It was somewhat, comforting in a weird way.
Both women looked at me with caring eyes and hugged me close.
I would never forget Rose, not even if I tried. But maybe Tanya was right. Maybe trying to actually live this life wasn't forgetting her, but something she would've wanted me to do.
…
1980's
Life was good. Travelling, learning, living, that's what I'd been doing these past decades. I'd learned more about who my family was, what made them...them.
Garrett is an older brother to me. An annoying older brother. He always seems to find some way to piss me off, all the time. His favorite way was throwing things at me to see if my shield was active.
Usually it wasn't. Not against objects that is. It turns out my shield is always active when, say a vampire, tries to use their talent on me. Like if Kate tried to grab a hold of me in order to use her gift, it wouldn't work. My shield would deflect it.
But if someone were to just throw something at me, I'd have to be prepared and ready to expand me shield out in order to protect myself. It was like my shield was always prepared against other gifts, just not random objects flying my way.
Garrett liked to take advantage of this tidbit of knowledge. I'd often be minding my own business, training or playing the piano, and feel a thwack of a book hitting the backside of my head or a large rock sticking into my side.
We got into wrestling matches. A lot.
Carmen and Eleazar were kind of like an aunt and uncle. Kind and friendly. People you didn't want to disappoint. They were always around when I was bored and wanted someone to talk to and were always keen on listening to my history.
I'd often find myself sitting out in the front lounge area with Carmen, talking about her human life, which was back in the 1700's. She'd tell me how different things are now and how she dealt with such drastic changes.
Her insight helped relieve some tension and confusion I've felt knowing I was bound to live on for eternity.
Eleazar was a coach to me as well. He would often be the one outside, helping me learn about my shield. I think part of the reason he was so interested in helping me was also because he was trying to better understand the weird haze that surround me and my shield.
Either way, it was incredibly helpful having him around.
Then there was Tanya and Kate. My two best friends. My two sisters.
Over the decades I had gotten to know them, I started viewing them more as family than just peers or acquaintances. After spending so much time with them, it was hard not to really get to know them.
I loved each and every one of them so much. They made up a strong, stable support system I couldn't imagine living without.
But a large part of me was still missing, and always would. Tanya and Kate had become sisters to me, but I couldn't help but miss Rose with heart aching pain.
What would she think of what had become of me? Would she be happy that I've been able to find a safe haven, or disappointed I'd been able to move on at all?
The rational side of me knew she would be happy. Rose would've wanted me to move on, just like I would have for her if she was in my position. I knew she would never be disappointed in me.
Yet, I couldn't stop feeling guilty. I couldn't shake the feeling that I should have done something more to keep her alive, to keep myself alive…
Tanya and Kate helped me with coping. They too had lost someone early on. Their mother. They spoke about fond memories with her and opened up about their grief, which I learned a lot from.
"I'll always remember her, which is a blessing and a curse I suppose," Tanya had said one afternoon. Everyone was off doing their own thing, enjoying the time to be alone or with their mates.
I was playing the piano, composing a piece I had been working on for some time now. I was trying to convert my life, up to this point, into sheet music, which was turning out to be incredibly difficult. I couldn't seem to convey the emotions I had felt when I found out that Rose had been killed.
Tanya always liked listening to me play, and often offered some helpful suggestions along the way. She seemed to sense that I was having difficulty, coming to sit next to me and look over what I had so far.
"It's painful to think about someone you love, especially if they were taken from you tragically. But would you want to forget Rose? Would you rather not feel the pain, but in exchange, not have the memories you created with her?
"I'd rather feel the pain, remember the emotion...embrace it. In a way, I feel like I'm honoring my mother when my heart aches a bit. It's a small reminded of the impact she had on my life. So, rather than viewing the pain as hurtful, I think of it as a way to keep my mother with me. Whenever I ache, I miss her, I know she'll always be here with me, if only in spirit."
I had stopped playing at this point, still facing the keys in front of me. My fingers ghosting over the ivory carefully. I suppose she's right. There's always been such a harsh connotation with feeling emotion. Like I'm supposed to be sad, grieve, and then move on.
And then, when I can't seem to do that, I feel like I'm doing something wrong. Like I'm being dramatic, when instead, I should always feel my emotions, welcome them. Thinking about the pain I feel as a symbol of how much I loved Rose, how much she meant to me seems like a really good idea.
I began playing, struck by a sudden inspiration. I glanced at Tanya to find her smiling softly, eyes closed, head lazily resting back. She was still as a statue, but somehow still looking soft and welcoming.
She always knew what to say.
…
1990's
The nineties were by far my favorite years to date. I had convinced Tanya, Kate, and Garrett to go back to school with me. We enrolled in the locate high school here in Alaska, before heading off to college at the University of Seattle Washington.
We'd decided to move around for a while, try different areas out, see other places. We couldn't stay in one area for too long, otherwise people would start wondering why we all looked the same 10 years later.
I'd always loved learning when I was a child, but now, I could choose any direction. Learn whatever I wanted without the connotations that often went along with an educated girl in the early 1900's.
Turns out, I loved school so much, I couldn't stop. I ended up getting degrees in multiple areas including law, medical, and history. Some, I'd pursued longer, getting doctoral level certification. Some, I didn't continue, not finding much enjoyment in it, such as finance or business.
The coven didn't seem to mind moving around with me, either. It was better for our imagine anyways. Better to leave earlier than too late.
Education became a pastime for me. When I was getting bored or anxious with the day-to-day life I was living, I'd choose another university and head off to learn more. Sometimes some of the other coven would join me, sometimes I'd be off on my own.
I'd learned that while we were a coven and a family, independence was also important and something that everyone practiced. I never felt like I was lonely or unwanted, but I had learned to become used to spending months, sometimes a year or so, off on my own, exploring.
I loved every minute.
Another reason I loved the 90's so much was because it was during this time that I got to choose my own mode of transportation. Prior, I had access to all the options the coven had of course, which included some outrageously nice pieces with logos that said 'Porsche' and 'Mercedes-Benz.'
We all had our poison. The thing that gave us a small thrill, cut the craving for our need for speed. Mine just happened to be my 1952 Vincent Black Shadow motorcycle.
Apparently the entire family had been collecting the pieces needed to refurbish one, specifically designed for me. As in, faster, stronger, better.
Vampires had their connections apparently.
They'd given it to me as a gift once I graduated with my doctorate in medicine at Yale. I almost lost my shit right then and there with the amount of excitement that coursed through me.
I'd skipped the ceremony, not wanting to sit so close to hundreds of deliciously smelling humans, so I had stayed back at the house we currently inhabited, wanting to spend time with my family instead.
Our place in New Hampshire was smaller than others we owned, but still large compared to most others in the area. With six vampires that never slept, we needed a lot of space to live or we'd kill one another.
It was four stories, all grey brick with huge windows scaling most of the front. A large driveway led up to it, giving off the feeling of, surprise, suprise, isolation and privacy. A large deck laid out front with a small, closed off area for when it rained or the weather turned cooler, not that it mattered much to us.
We had been lounging around the house, me playing piano once again, while a few members of my family listened. It was one of those days where people were off doing their own thing but would stop and hang out while I played at times as well.
We were planning on going hunting that night as a sort of celebration for my graduation. I was in the mood for some lynx, so we had planned on heading over to the Yukon Territory for something special.
I was halfway through one of Kate's favorite pieces when I heard a distant rumble. It was just barely there, a few miles away at least. I was used to random cars driving by, but when this particular sound got more distinct, a clear indication that it was coming our way, I stopped playing all together.
This sound was different than any of the cars we owned. Garrett was gone, but I hadn't questioned it before. He was always disappearing, running off doing who knows what.
I looked at the others, wondering if they knew who was visiting but was startled to see them all staring at me, Kate practically bouncing out of her seat.
"What…?" I questioned, getting a little nervous as to why everyone was looking at me and who the hell was getting closer to the house.
"Come on, come on, they're almost here," was all Carmen said. She, too, seemed really giddy. Way more so than I had ever seen before.
"What's going on? Are we expecting visitors?" I asked as Kate grabbed my hand and practically dragged me through the front door, Carmen and Eleazar in tow.
Still, no one said anything. We all just stood by the front door, listening to the strange sound approach closer every second.
"What is goi-," my sentence cut off when Garrett came zooming into the driveway at 190mph on an all matt black, beautiful 1952 Vincent Black Shadow.
My jaw all but fell to the floor.
"Wha...what...how...what is…" I couldn't even speak, my eyes trained on the beauty in front of me.
"Aw, look at that, we finally shut the girl up!" Garrett yelled before slapping his knee for effect. Literally slapping his knee. I threw him a glare which he responded to by blowing me a taunting kiss.
"How did you guys get this? The parts, they're all custom! The matt black? They don't make them like this!" I said as I fawned over it. I had zipped over to it the second Garrett got off. I couldn't even touch it, too scared I'd mess something up.
"It's all yours, Isa." Eleazar grinned as he rubbed his palms together excitedly.
I stopped moving, jaw dropping again. I looked at all their faces, looking for some sign of falsehood.
All I found were the happy faces of my family as they took in just how excited I was. Even Garrett was wiggling in happiness. Such a dork.
"We thought it was about time you had your own transportation. Call it a graduation present," Tanya squeaked out happily as she bounced on the balls of her feet.
"EEEKK! SHUT UP REALLY! ARE YOU SERIOUS!" I yelled out. By this point I had taken to running laps around the house, kicking up dirt in my path but not caring in the slightest.
I heard the quiet laughter from my family before I stopped right by my bike, gently stroking the leather seat caringly.
"So are you gonna take her for a test drive or what?" Garrett pressed. I eagerly hopped on, ready to take off and see how fast this thing could go but I was stopped by Tanya, who held out a sleek, matt black helmet. I looked at her, my eyebrow cocked in question.
"There's humans around here. Can't go riding around without one, can you? It'll spark up suspicion."
I grabbed it from her, sticking it on my head quickly, eager to get out on the open road.
As I cranked the gas, I overheard Garrett mutter, "damn, she looks hot doesn't she?" followed by what sounded like a punch to the stomach, most likely from Kate.
God I loved my family.
…
A/N:
Hi! You made it to the bottom, yay!
This chapter had so much information and jumps around a lot, I know. I wanted to let you guys know that once we get to the present day, things stop jumping around so much and slow down.
I love creating more background and depth to the characters, rather than just plopping you all down and expecting you to just know how close the Denali's and Bella have gotten over time.
How are you guys liking this story so far? We haven't gotten too far but I'd love to hear some more feedback! Your reviews and encouragement are awesome awesome awesome.
My updates are going to be a little farther apart starting now. I'm taking on a lot more at work (hopefully getting a promotion soon?) so my hours are 45+ a week. Don't fret though, this story has a ways to go and I'm so excited to share it with you all.
Stick with me!
Thanks again for reading, hope you all loved it!
BYE!