The next day, chunin exam day...
'Fucking finally!' Naruto shot up from his bed like a suger induced hound, quickly speeding into his kitchen for a quick and healthy breakfast of easy make ramen. He quickly gobbled his meal down as usual then rushed for his bathroom to take a shower. Once that was done, he rushed to the closet, grabbing his usual pants, gloves, and boots with necklace before grabbing his sealed weaponry, now including at least a dozen freshly bought kunai, and his bokken. Once he was well dressed and well prepared, he blasted off from his window towards the academy.
Naruto was literally becoming a whirlwind from the way he was leaping and running through the streets, knocking some people and small inanimate objects down or to the side from his swiftness. It didn't take him long to reach his destination and his teammates.
"Greetings Naruto-san. We-woah now!" Yakumo yelped as she and Sai were grabbed by their newly arriving comrade and held under his arms. "Naruto-san, what are you-"
"No time for talk, time for running!" He replied with tongue haste matching his leg haste. He breezed right by the first floor, but the second floor wasn't so breezey, being filled with a dozen other genin teams due to a blockade from two other genin in front of a door. They looked so familiar.
"Let us through already!" A bruised looking genin shouted. She was sent tumbling away by a kick from one of the door guarding genin.
The genin with a cap on shook her head. "Sorry, but weak kids like you don't belong in there. Trust us, we're doing you a favor pipsqueaks."
The other genin with spikey hair nodded. "Beyond this door is a harsh trial, not meant for the likes of you. Go home before you get hurt."
'What the hell? We only went through one flight.' He stooped for a moment, ignoring the squirms of Yakumo in his right arm as looked at the room and replayed his short term memory in his head. 'Yeah, this is the second floor and that door... it says 301... I get it.' Naruto's look of realization earned him a nod from from both his teammates who easily figured it out the moment they entered the room.
Genjutsu obviously wasn't Naruto's strong suit, being who he is both personality and gender wise, but he could easily figure out and break from the lower ranked genjutsu, even a few of the higher ranked ones thanks to the training he got from Yakumo and Kagome. All he had to do was pulse his chakra to find and purge the foreign chakra that entered his body from the genjutsu castor. Naturally, his jinchuuriki ckakra certainly made this process easier. This particular genjustu was casted on the area however, thus requiring knowledge and memory to overcome, which he did.
With that cat out of the bag, he and his teammates looked over at the so called genin doing the genjutsu-ing. It wasn't hard to figure out they were two poorly disguised chunin. Izumi and Tetsuko to be exact. Team 7 sweatdropped at their poor disguise, for they only made themselves look younger and that was it.
'How lackluster.' Team 7 all thought. Then again, they figured this was most likely a pretest to weed out the truly simple minded genin. Team 7 certainly wasn't about to call them out and the other smart genin who figured out the pretest knew not to too.
So while the "genin" guarding the door were busy arguing with a a team of plucky young genin, Naruto dashed right on by and up the second flight. This led to them meeting up with team 8 just up the stairs.
"Figured the disgusting Uchiha would lead them up here." The Kyuubi was finally awake.
'I doubt Sakura and Ami-baka would have trouble with that genjutsu. But yeah, knowing Satsuki-teme, she'd figure that out in a heartbeat.'
"Hey dobe. You figure out that poor excuse for a parlor trick too?" Satsuki asked, not even bothering to turn around as they walked up the stairs. "Not bad."
Naruto tched. "Don't patronize me teme. You'd be surprised if I didn't figure it out."
"I'm surprised your even here." Ami muttered, but team 7 heard.
"Given from your record in the academy, I'm surprised you're even still around Ami-san." Yakumo said in a polite tone from under Naruto's arm, though her words were anything but polite. Ami rolled her eyes as she continued to follow her team.
They reached a stopping point, but not at their preferred destination. In front of the hallway leading to the prime location was a certain green spandex wearing young kunoichi waiting for them, and judging from her specific look at Satsuki, she was after her for some reason. Naruto knew and groaned internally.
"You, the one with hip hair and a depressing attitude! Are you one of the two Rookie of the Year?" Lei asked as she pointed towards Satsuki.
Satsuki crossed her arms. "Hn. You mean THE Rookie of the Year. And yeah, that's me, Satsuki Uchiha." Naruto nearly blanched at that egocentric statement, but chose to let it slide in order to see what happens next.
Lei smirked before taking the gokken stance, feet together and one fist behind while the other made the come hither gesture. "I am Rock Lei and I'm here to challenge you. I wish to test my strength and earn the title of Naruto-kun's true rival!" She exclaimed eagerly.
Everyone else turned to aforementioned boy. He was just as confused as them. "Uh."
"I can see it in your eyes Naruto-kun! Even when we sparred together, I could feel Satsuki-chan in your thoughts. The mutual feeling of rivalry is pungent between you two, even despite the time of separation! Not to mention it's been so long since we've had a good go at it. I must do this, to prove my strength and become your true rival!" Lei exclaimed, shaking her fist in righteous passion. Everyone except Naruto had a sweatdrop at her rather eccentric personality.
"Whatever. I accept your challenge." Satsuki said, taking her fighting stance.
"Is this really necessary." Ami groaned. "Not that I doubt your strength Satsuki, but don't you think we should be heading to the test area." Ami went ignored and huffed, deciding to lean on a neaby wall. Naruto noticed her lack of a familiar suffix at her supposedly idolized teammate and rose an eyebrow.
'That was odd. That isn't exactly how a fan girl would address her idol is it.'
"Being on a team with someone like her, who would remain a fan that long?" The Kyuubi asked.
"You've got this Satsuki-chan!" Saukra cheered from the sidelines, stars in her eyes.
"Oh Kami, I stand corrected." Naruto shared his tenants sentiments.
"Naruto-san." Yakumo said. She gestured to her and Sai's position.
"Gotcha." Naruto said with a nod and turned to the about to battle pair. "Team 7's gotta go, but good luck Satsuki-teme. Lei, don't be to brutal." He promptly dashed off.
"Hn. She'll need more th-Wait! What the fuck is that supposed to mean?! Dobe?!"
"Looks like my dream team's all here." Kagome said, not even bothering to look up from her book, uncaring about the odd way Naruto held his teammates. "You can put them down by the way." He did so.
"Oof. Ugh, thank you Naruto-san." Yakumo said with a little irritation as she got up and dusted herself off. Sai said nothing and stood as if nothing happened.
"I'm glad all of you came. Had even a single one of you not showed up, I would've had to disqualify all of you." Kagome's words earned curious looks from her genin.
Yakumo spoke her team's thoughts. "If I may be so bold to ask, why? The chunin exam said these test are meant to evaluate a single ninja for promotion."
Kagome nodded. "True, but it still requires the full team to enter. Ninja have to work together after all." She began to eye smile. "But I'm sure you all don't need to be told that. I know I don't say this very often, usually because I'm not prompted to, but I'm proud of you. All of you are wonderful genin about to become wonderful chunin. Good luck you three." Kagome then began to open the doors to the testing room.
Naruto was practically jumping with anticipation and Yakumo had a rather big smile on her face. Sai seemed emotionless as usual, but there seemed to be something there. Once the door was opened, Kagome shunshined away and Team 7 was left to themselves in a room full of hungry wolves. These genin, some of whom who were older, were leaking killing intent and when Team 7 presented themselves, it fell on them.
Yakumo paled a bit, but regained her composure while Sai gave it the usual emotionless treatment. Naruto began to leak the KI right back, nearly growling at the perceived challenge. In response to his response, some of the genin quickly backed off or calmly looked away while those a little more full of themslves quietly laughed at the sole male in the room, trying to ignore their slight worry. Given his backround, it would take a truly high caliber genin to put any amount of fear into Naruto and even then, it would be a highly welcomed challenge.
The trio were about to find a seat when Team 8 entered the room. Satsuki was bruised, both figuratively and literally. Ami looked unimpressed and Sakura was disappointed.
"Everything go well Satsuki-teme?" Naruto asked condescendingly. Satsuki hnned and flipped him off while Ami just groaned.
"Seriously Naruto-san, I wish you wouldn't antagonize her." Yakumo said, earning a nod of agreement from Sakura.
"Sorry, it's just the natural order Yakumo-chan. She does something stupid becasue of her ego and I call her out. It's as natrual as the sun rising and setting." Naruto said sagely.
Sai stroked her chin. "Didn't you do something considerably far more stupid at one point. In fact, I recall you pulled numerous pranks and mischievous wrong doings in your academy days that numerous people called you out on before that incident. Are you sure you don't have the natural order mixed up or am I missing a key component?" She said, earning a few giggles from Yakumo, Sai, and Sakura. Satsuki actually nodded in approval.
Naruto turned to Sai with a plastic smile. "Sai, shut your mouth or I'll kill you." He didn't notice this, but one of the Kiri genin turned in his direction and shivered.
"Naruto-Kun!" Someone squealed. With litle warning he was nearly tackled by the platnium blone limpet that is Ino. He dodged to the side however, causing Ino to glomp Sakura instead. "Gah! I didn't want you forehead!"
"I didn't want you either, Ino-pig, get off of me!" Sakura yelled back. They began to wrestle childishly on the floor, making everyone sweatdrop and blanch.
"Would you two stop being so loud. Your making us look bad and it's troublesome." Shikamari drawled with Choume behind her eating some chips.
Naruto turned and waved at the respectively lazy Shikamari and busty Choume. "Sup you two. Ready to blow the competition away?"
"Not really." Shikamari sighed.
"Well if you fight like you play shogi, I'll be sure to keep my eye on you." Naruto drawled.
"Holy shit you guys, the dream generations are all here!"
The group turned to find Team 10 strolling through the door, Kiba in the center with the large Akamaru beside her, Hinata sorta hiding behind her but not, and Shika on the side being mysterious as usual.
"Hey, if it ain't Hinata, Shika, and dog breath." Naruto greeted with his shit eating grin.
"I wouldn't be so confident omega. My team is gonna kick shit outta everybody here including you." Kiba said with an equally cocky demeanor, her nin-dog nodding eagerly.
"Kib-a-chan, th-there's no need to b-be so boisterous." Hinata said from behind her.
"Hinata-sans right Kiba-san. We don't wanna draw unnecessary aggression towards ourselves." Shika said.
"You should listen to your friend, Inuzuka-san. It's the noisy genin who go down first." Everyone turned to see a white haired and bespectacled older kunoichi walk towards them. She was a Konoha kunoichi as well. "Your actaully being louder than them." The girl said, pointing to Kumo genin group.
A red haired girl with golden eyes was beating down a white haired girl who was still sucking on her lolipop. The busty blond of the group was coolly trying to somehat disassociate herself from them.
"Would you guys stop being uncool." The busty blond said quietly, not even bothering to look at them.
"Why I will Samui, as soon as Omoi here stops being a dumbass!" The crimson head replied as she held up Omoi by her collar.
"Karui, I'm just looking out for our safety. For all we know, this exam could be a clever sham." Omoi whispered, earning another punch to the face.
"And you are?" Ino asked a bit hotly, taking attention away from that group back to the new girl.
The kunoichi in purple chuckled, pushing her glasses up the bridge of her nose. "My name is Kabuko Yakushi, genin of Konoha. Pleasure to make your acquaintance. Not to worry you all or anything, but look around you." She gestured inconspicuously to the other teams around them. "I hear the Suna and Taki teams are especially dangerous this year. Not to mention we've got some Iwa among us." She whispered. The rookies truned and noticed the stares they were getting, especially from the emphasized teams. Naruto saw the Suna teams from the side and a the Taki team some rows away. Two of them were dressed in dark violet vests, though the brown curly haired one had her midriff exposed while the black spiky harired one had two scrolls attached to her. The third kunoichi really stood out, having, tan skin, green hair, and orange eyes while she wore wore a white outfit and had some red cylinder on her back.
The Iwa team were further down. A pink eyed girl with short and choppy black hair wearing the standard Iwa uniform without a sleeve for the right arm, a girl with brown hair and a forehead that could rival Sakura wearing a red trimmed pruple kimono, and the last one was a long haired blond girl wearing glasses and a white zip up poncho with baggy pants.
"Konoha's actually letting a male participate? Talk about showing off." Suzembachi, the forehead girl of Iwa, said with distaste.
"I doubt he'll get far." Jibachi, the blond, commented.
Kurotsuchi, the pink eyed one, didn't comment, settling to just think about more important matters. Though she did feel a sense of ominous de-ja-vu looking at the blonde boy.
Naruto was about speak out and challenge them, but Yakumo grabbed him by the hand to get his attention. She shook her head, knowing what he might try to pull and he reluctantly listened to her.
"Oi, Fuu. What's up?" Yoro, the kunoichi with short spiky black hair said to the green haired girl next to her. "You've been staring at that particular Konoha team for a bit now."
"Uh, don't worry about. I was just... staring at that blond guy's abs." Fuu said nervously quickly. Her teammates looked at her oddly before shrugging, going back to their conversation about secret stuff. 'Why does that boy feel so weird. He couldn't be... no, there's no way. Right?'
Kanakuro turned her attention back to her sisters. "Great, the jackass is here."
Temari shrugged. "Look on the brightside. He could make this exam interesting and you might get a chance to kill him yourself."
"No." Gaara suddenly spoke, keeping her gaze on her target. "He is mine to kill. You may simply watch."
The Konoha rookies shrugged off the stares. Sakura took this time to address their recently introduced ally. "So Kabuko-san. If you don't mind me asking, is this your second year here?" She asked.
Kabuko blushed a bit before sighing out her answer. "More like my seventh."
Kiba and Naruto cringed. "My god, you must suck a fuck-ton." Kiba stated.
Kabuko shrugged. "That or maybe the competition is harder than it seems. Who knows, maybe seven is my lucky number. Besides, I get more informed each time." She said as she pulled out a deck of cards. "Considering we are allies, let me give you some help." She channeled some chakra into the deck and with a poof, the top card transformed. It was now a map with each of the elemental nations displayed with a number. "These cards allow me to pull information on nearly any individual with just their name or initials alone. Go on, ask me about anyone and I'll see if I can pull out their info for you."
"Really?" Naruto asked as he crossed his arms. "Got anything on Gaara no Sabaku?"
"Not even a challenge." Kabuko said mirthfully. She immediately pulled out her information and read it to them. "Gaara no Sabaku, youngest of the three daughters of the Kazekage. No D ranks, 8 C ranks, 27 B ranks, and 2 A ranks. All them without a scratch apparently. Oh my, your in for quite the competition with her."
'No kidding.' Naruto thought with a smile creeping on his face. 'What a time to enter!'
"You have anything on Rock Lei and Naruto Uzumaki?" The voice of Satsuki asked, breaking Naruto of his eager thoughts.
"Of course." She was about to pull them out, but she was stopped by the rather steel hard grip of the Uzumaki.
"Look, I get your nice and all, but let's not let peer pressure make you reveal sensitive information of allies to the self servicing, alright?" Kabuko nervously nodded at Naruto's request. Naruto turned to said self servicer, getting into a glare off with her. Tension was now of the uneasy variety.
Kabuko coughed into her hand. "As you can see, this years exam has quite the turnout of many villages genin. Though, I do have some doubt of Oto. Their relatively new and small, only sending one team to boot."
This comment caught the attention of the Oto team. They didn't take to kindly to this and turned towards each, planning something.
"You guys heard her too, right?" Kin, the long raven haired girl asked.
"Damn straight we did. What do you think Doki, should we put that nerdy bitch in her place?" Zaku, a girl wearing a shi (death) shirt and gravity defiant hair asked.
Doki, the girl with bandages all over and a big coat, nodded. "Definitely. Follow my lead."
They turned back to Kabuko and disappeared from most of the genin's sight. Most of them.
The Oto team nearly closed in on Kabuko, making Naruto tense in preparation to intervene.
The bandaged girl with the gauntlet on her arm came forward first. She was about to strike at Kabuko, but with little warning, Naruto kicked both her feet right out from under her with a low roundhouse, making her tumble forward and crash into a nearby wall behind Kabuko. The spiky haired death shirt girl and the long raven haired one, while caught of guard, went forward to retaliate. They were kicked off their feet too, as Naruto went from crouching to spinning on his back with his legs lasing out with his spinning. He easily backflipped back up in front of Kabuko.
"You guys wanna pull that sneaky shit, pull it on someone not associated with me." Naruto growled.
"Ah, fuck! That was a lucky shot you bastard!" Doki growled as she got up.
"Wanna try it again and see how lucky you were the first time?" Naruto asked, really anticipating another attempt.
The confrontation wasn't allowed to escalate with the poofing appearance of several chunin in the room. "Everyone settle the fuck down!" A rather powerful sounding and looking amazon of a woman dressed in a trench coat and proctor uniform barked. Ibiki, head of the Konoha's interrogation unit. "You, Oto, another out burst from any of you like that again and your finished! Got it?!"
Doki and her team nodded reluctantly. "Of course ma'am. We're just jumpy as all." Doki said insincerely.
"Now, everyone take your seat!" Ibiki roared and the genin all rushed to comply. The chunin sprinted down the rows, handing out papers near instantaneously to eacn genin. "I am Morino Ibiki, proctor of the first portion of the exam, the written test."
"Shit..." Naruto muttered.
"Can't wait to see how you fuck this one up." The Kyuubi chuckled.
'Unless the words that come out of your mouth are answers, shut your fleshlight!'
"Now everyone pay attention, cause I'm only saying this once. First rule, you need to answer ten questions to maintain your ten starting points. For every question you get wrong, you lose a point to your overall score. Rule two, if one team member fails, the entire team fails."
"Hold on!" A random genin shouted. "I-"
"No questions, shut up!" Ibiki barked, making the genin cower in her seat. "The third rule is two points shall be taken away from anyone caught cheating by either me or one of the chunin in this room." Everyone looked around nervously at the at the chunin lined environment while a few of the genin weren't intimidated. "If you're caught three times, you and your team are finished. The final rule is faliing to answer any of the questions correctly or total termination of initial points equate failiure. Understood? Don't answer, if you don't understand, that's a you problem. Begin!"
Genin began scrambling to answer their questions. Naruto looked over his questions and felt like crying. They were all far too hard for him to answer and only walking encyclopedias stood a chance.
"Achoo." Sakura sneezed.
"Score deduction!" Ibiki shouted, making Sakura shake and her teamates twitch in annoyance.
Using his skills in the art of the discreet, Naruto looked around at the kunoichi around him. The Hyuuga's used their byakugan, Tenten used mirrors, and Satsuki seem to be mirroring hand movements. Then it hit him. 'I'm supposed to cheat.' He realized. Ninja, warriors mastering in the art of stealth, trickery, and dirty tactics are supposed to do this sorta thing. No wonder they made Ibiki head of the first part of the exams.
Knowing what he had to do, Naruto looked around until his eyes came upon a chosen target, another genin a row down. With a smirk, he used some wind to get Sai's attention, letting her discreetly know what to do by using some writing on his paper. She complied, using some ink jutsu to make some ink flies and sending them toward their target genin. Without being caught, the ink flies relayed the information to Sai who wrote the answers on her paper. Naruto followed her pencil's lead.
With Naruto being able to get through the test, time seemed to fly by like that, with more and more teams being kicked out for their incompetence. Once everyone appeared through with the questions and no one could be caught, Ibiki decided it was time. "Pencils down maggots, it's time for he tenth and final question. Before I ask it however, I have to go over some rules first. The first rule is, you get a choice in answering it."
"A choice? What happens if we don't answer it?" Omoi asked. Ibiki smiled, putting the genin in the room at unease.
"You and your team fail of course." She answered, causing the genin in the room to go in an uproar. She quickly silenced most of them with a dose of killing intent, though some were muttering.
"That's complete bullshit! I heard the exams could be taken multiple times!" Kiba yelled, Akamaru barking in agreement.
"Guess you got unlucky this year pup." Ibiki sad, chuckling wickedly. "I'm hosting these exams and I'm essentially your Kami now. So, either face my question tits up or walk on out now and pray for a better year. Your call." In an instant, several hands went up and people walked out. Naruto couldn't help but feel disgusted at the quitters, some of whom were dragging their braver teammates with them.
'Came this far, why stop now.' He thought to himself, his determination unwavering. He looked behind him and saw Sakura about to raise her hand. He gritted his teeth, worrying she would let her fear get the better of her and hinder the progress of Team 8. He couldn't let her do that, he wanted to see what Satsuki was made of now.
With an unexpected motion, Naruto stood up and punched a hole right through his desk, catching everyone of guard with the uncalled for action. "Your scare tactics are cheap shit Ibiki! We came this far, why stop now! Being a shnobi is an all or nothing matter, like this is any diffrent!"
"You would put your career on the line, boy? Knowing you could never rise up in the ranks?" Ibiki asked with a deep frown.
"Considering I'd be risking life and limb on a daily basis, I hardly call this a risk! Only a pussy would back out of this!" Naruto defiantly yelled. "If you wanna scare me away, try harder scar-chan!"
Ibiki looked around and noticed no one even considering to raise their hands now. 'This little bastead broke my grip of fear over the others, I can't drag this on any more. Anko was right, his will ain't exactly easy to pushover. Lets see... seventy eight left. Damn.' Ibiki sighed as she looked towards the other Proctors. They nodded. "Alright ya little gremlins, I've got one thing left to say... congratulations, you've all passed."
"WHAT!" All the genin pretty much yelled.
"You heard me, you've all passed. This was the tenth question all along." Ibiki said. Without any waring she removed her bandana to reveal-
"Oh my Kami!/ She's bald! Bald! Bald! Bald!/ My eyes!"
"Okay! Enough of that! Let me try this." She said as she put her bandana back on and rolled up her sleeves to reveal numerous horrendous scares. "Being a kunoichi, or in the loudmouthed desk punchers case, a shinobi, requires putting ones very life at risk to various atrocities. every move you make, every breath you take could lead to your death or worse. And trust me, this from me doing things the right way. Mistakes rarely make for good learning experiences."
"Is that why your bald?" A random Ame genin asked.
"... I hope you die first." She muttered, narrowing her eyes at the hat wearing genin. "Congratulations and good luck on the second exams, brats." The genin were about to celebrate until a purple haired trenchcoat wearing kunoichi smashed through the window. "Ah, Anko. You're... early."
"What the hell, twenty six teams still left? What's up with the piss poor performance this year Ibiki-chan?"
"Blame it on the one dick here." Ibiki answered, pointing at Naruto.
"Gaki?! Hot damn, it's been too long! Damn, you've grown, in all the right places might I add." She said the last part a bit huskily.
"You're not gonna perv on me are ya?" Naruto asked.
"You ask that like it would be a bad thing." She said with a fake pout.
"Given your track record, scaly tits, you could see why I'm a little on guard."
"Psh, whatever. I know you crave some of this." She said, grabbing a handful of her chests and jiggled them a bit. She then turned to regard the genin group as whole. "Alright you little shits, follow me. Failure to do so equals death by snakes!" She yelled, jumping out of the window again.
Everyone turned to Naruto. "I know her from a... friend. Come on, if we don't follow her, she probably will kill us." He wasted no time in jumping out the window with everyone following after him. Ahead of the group, Anko and Naruto where doing some catching up while people gave them looks ranging from curiosity to jealousy.
Anko eventually led them to a forest and she stopped to address them. "Welcome to the second part of the exams. I'm your proctor, Anko Mitarashi and this is traning ground 44. Otherwise known as the Forest of Death."
AN: Doki-Dosu
Kabuko-Kabuto
My tablet can annoy the shit outta me. I try to type something like Naruto, it types "NBA Uto" or some stupid shit like that. It's so aggravating, especially when I don't notice before I post. I'm considering asking a friend to be my beta.
The rest of the names are normal. For the kunochi most likely not that well known amongst the fandom, I described them a bit more.
Made the mistake of calling Choume Chouhime instead. Fixed it. She is Choume.
Now we're gettin' to the fun parts.
Light 'Kira' Yagami: I hope your exam went well. For the list, let me tell you the certains. All of the rookies, Sand sisters, Fuu, Kurotsuchi, Haku, Sound five, Suigetsu, Karin, Kumo team. There will be more than that, but for now, I'm just telling you the current and guaranteed. Some people I'm still on the fence about and/or decideing on how.
Gammagyro: I will include the movies, yes. OC adventures will come if necessary, but I can put a spin of the stuff already given to me from fillers/cannon. Also, thank you for your continued reading of my works Gamma. Thank you.
Have a good one. Go hentai!