(AN) I want to take the time to say two things.
One, I'm really sorry that it's taken me so long to post, but the last time I did I was drowning in all my final exams and stuff so :P. My computer needs anti virus so I have to use my moms (secret between us) and you'd think me now being on summer brake means I'd have more time to write. NOPE. I have to clean the house, do my summer homework, babysit my younger sibling, deal with my sisters that are somehow BOTH going through puberty, and going on random family trips... Ok the last part is fun but I HAVE NO TIME! So I'm sorry and I'm hoping I can try getting my shit together better soon.
Two, I know the story so far is kinda just revolving around angst more than anything else, but I'm really trying to get the ground work straight and who in their right mind ever thought Incest was a simple "Oh brother I've always loved but it's so wrong" "Oh sister I've loved you this whole time as well" "Really" "Yes, and look everyone has accepted us" "So we can know live happily ever after without worry" "Yes, now let's run into the sunset together holding hands" "Yay". I mean, I'm not too big a fan of seeing (or I guess READING here) characters doing nothing but crying and be sad, but I swear, this story will eventually get out of the angst, go into a romance and turn into a different type of angst. I mean common, it's Incest. Basically, I'm telling you guys to bare with the sadness because I'll try to make it as sweet, loving, caring and romantic as possible when it's over. *cough* And steamy *cough* What? Who said that?
Misora Asuka: You know Asuka-chan (can I call you Misora-chan?) you've just been so sweet and I'm glad I'm not the only one. :) And it's good I made the choice to not just leave Sasuke in the dark about the whole thing happening! I also know what you mean cause sometimes I like to imagine little 12 year old Sasuke defending his sister. AND... Well maybe I will, WHO KNOWS~! ;3
Apocalypsebutterfly: Nope! It's actually Servant of Evil which is the greatest Vocaloid song of all time. That's an actual fact, not just the opinion of a hormonal teenage girl that has a huge crush on Len. What are you talking about?!
"Naruto, for the last time I don't want another rematch."
"Come on Haru-chan! The last times were total flukes, I'll beat you this time!"
Haruka just sighed and looked down to the floor exhausted. She wasn't even supposed to spare today, it was her turn to help the middle school martial arts kids learn some basic moves for their fieldtrip. This wasn't much of a surprise though, considering it's Naruto. She loves her dear, dear childhood friend-just as much as she did Hinata-but she's really tired of him either pestering her or Sasuke for a rematch every time they had martial arts practice.
She just gave Naruto one more tired look-looking straight into his blazing blue eyes as he wore his signature grin-...
"Now, why don't we move on to spin kicks?" She gave the confused group a big upperclassmen smile.
"Hey! Don't just ignore m-!"
Before Naruto could let out another word Haruka quickly spun around and raised her foot to harshly hit the side of Naruto's face. He let out a single cry of pain before falling to the floor. After he twitched a few times-reassuring that he's still alive-Haruka let out a sigh and turned around to face the bewildered children with her smile again.
"That's an example of how it works, and I'm sure Haruna-San explains how to do it last week?" They all nodded in union-not knowing whether to be amazed or terrified. "Alright, then go practice on the dummies against the wall."
"Hai!" They all began running toward said dummies, and Haruka spotted a group of three together smiling as they ran.
"Did you see how hard she kicked Big Brother Naruto?! I even saw some blood!"
"Konohamaru, remember to only hit the dummies this time!"
"Yes sensei!" He didn't look back to her and was barely believable.
But, she only sighed and looked down at her knuckle-headed friend. "You ok Naruto?"
However, as he was getting up to sit right, his only response was, "What the heck Haru-chan?! What was that for?! That really hurt like Hell!"
"Yeah, sorry about that." She gave him a guilty smile.
Naruto just stared at her for a while and groaned. "You know I can't be mad at you when you make that face, it makes me look like the bad guy. Alright, alright, I forgive you!"
Haruka gave him a big smile as he got back up to his feet. 'Works every time.' She thought gleefully.
"Besides, you're so thick in the skull that you work as a perfect dummy!" Haruka looked behind Naruto and spotted the familiar voice with a look showing she knew just where this was going.
Naruto spun around and glared harshly as said person. "Shut up Kiba! You're just mad because your best friends isn't here to sniff your butt!"
In response Kida switched from happily joking to glaring right back. "Hey! Don't you talk about Akamaru that way! At least I don't go off asking to get my ass kicked by Sasuke or Haru!"
"Those times were just flukes!"
Haruka just stood back and wondered if she should step in or let it die on its own.
'Speaking of Sasuke, he's taking a really long time in the bathroom.' Haruka silently thought to herself. '...Maybe he ran into Karin again...' She silently hoped that he wouldn't let his temper get the better of him if that were the case.
Karin was somehow a bigger fan of Sasuke than Sakura or Ino-'course Sasuke isn't Ino's only target. Karin was always going to great lengths to try and seduce him, even going so far as to accidentally walking into the boys' locker room with nothing but a towel on when Sasuke was the only one in there. The only reason Haruka knew about that is because Naruto had walked in on it-earning a black eye from Karin for it-and he later complained about how all the girls are after Sasuke-'poor Hinata'.
Haruka had absolutely nothing against Karin-other than her trying to de flower her brother-but she wasn't too fond of listening to Sasuke complain about how weird the girls at their school are. She also just wished Karin wouldn't go so far and actually catch the hint-for her and Sasuke's own good.
"Come on Big Brother Naruto, you can beat him!"
Haruka just stared at her two friends as each of them began moving forward to make a grab at the other's shirt to-try-and punch them. She sighed at Konohamaru's excited cheers and realized she will have to step in this time… Or Sasuke.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"Come on Sasuke-kun, I know a good place where we can be alone~. I know how much you don't like to be interrupted~."
"If you know so well, then get out of the way." Once again he tried to go around the red head-wearing her tracksuit-only to have her block his way-accidentally pushing up her cleavage just a bit more.
"Or don't be so cruel Sasuke-kun~. I just want to get closer to you~."
Once again, Karin has tried to corner him into being intimate, and he promised Haru that he wouldn't hurt her-or any one of his annoying fan girls. So, not only did he have to hold himself back, but he also had to try getting her to knock it off.
"Karin, for the last time, I don't care, and I'm not interested, so just move-"
"Sasuke!"
He paused and-with relief-looked up to see Haru peeking into the hallways from corner wall-obviously trying to not look directly at Karin.
"Naruto and Kida are getting into another fight, so I need you to come and break it up."
He would complain that she could have easily done it herself, but he could tell just what she was trying to do. "Fine, Karin move."
She opened her mouth in protest for a moment until she seemed to have thought about it and pressed her lips together in a pout while moving out of the way.
As Sasuke walked passed her-toward his rescuer-he watched Haru turn back around to get back to the dojo. He also heard the red head mutter something under her breathe, but decided to just ignore it.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"Now, are you sure they were on their best behavior?"
"Yes, Ebisu-san, they were."
"Even Konohamaru?"
"Yes, very much." Haruka decided to let the fact that he skipped out on practice to try and help Naruto against Kida slid this time.
Ebisu-san just stared at her longer-trying to look past her smile. He just sighed and nodded to her. "If you say so. Now class, thank Uchiha-san and follow me."
Haruka just watched-with slight discomfort-as all the kids bowed to her and all said in union. "Thank you for lending us your dojo!" She really wished it was someone else's shift today-she's always been a bit discomforted with formality.
"You're all very welcome." She said as she began closing the door.
Once it was closed she finally let her smile drop and sighed out of exhaustion. 'I love those kids, but I really prefer it when Iruka-sensei is picking them up.'
"You still haven't changed, Haru-chan?"
Haruka turned around and saw Naruto change into his school uniform with his bag over his shoulder. Her eyes also curiously looked at the bandage on his forehead-Kida had an identical one.
"Yeah, I just sent the kids out. Why are you barely leaving?" He was usually the first out the door since Ichiraku's place closed a couple minutes after practice on the weekdays.
He just gave her a big grin-that showed just how proud he is for whatever he's about to do. "I thought I'd just go check on sick little Hinata-chan and make her feel better."
Haruka's eyes widened a little, and she didn't know whether to be happy or worried.
In the end she just nervously smiled at Naruto-oblivious to the 'nervously' part. "Really?"
"Yup! I even got her some ramen from the store-since I can't bring her Ichiraku's-and something my mom made for her!"
"W-Well, tell her I said to get better soon."
"No problem. Later!"
"Bye."
Haruka watch Naruto happily go through the door, and just stared a while at it closed. Then, she just let out a little laugh under her breath. 'Good luck Hinata-chan.'
She finally walked away and decided to just change, find Sasuke, and leave-
"Haru-san!"
Haruka blinked a little and turned around to find Karin-for some reason still in her tracksuit-holding two bags of some track equipment.
"Hi, Karin-san." Haruka just looked at her confused.
Karin put the bag down, dashed over to her and clasped her hands together. "I'm really sorry, but can you help me with something?"
. . . . . . . . . . . .
"It's my turn to put the equipment away, but I have to get home quick since my sick grandma is in the hospital. Do you think you can do it for me?"
Haruka knew it was a lie, and also not that convincing of one. Since her, Karin, and Sasuke were the last students on campus it was obvious what Karin was pulling. Get the big sister out of the way and then make a move on the brother.
It was all easy to read, but for some reason Haruka still just said 'yes'. Of course she doesn't want Sasuke to be lured into sex-she's still his older sister-but she's also aware that he'll fall for her tricks when Hell freezes over-she hopes.
…Maybe she just agreed because, somewhere in the back of her mind, the image of a certain someone came to mind… And she thought she was doing so much better lately...
"Haru, what the hell are you doing?"
She turned around to face Sasuke-also changed into his uniform-with a big smile. "Karin wanted to distract me so that she could make her move on you."
Sasuke just made a slightly annoyed expression and sighed. He walked over to Haruka, and began to walk with her. "So she had you put away the track equipment?"
"Yup. You can take a bag if you want."
"I'm not the one that decided to be overly helpful."
"Fair enough."
Haruka just continued smiling as Sasuke walked along sider her as they made their way behind the school to the equipment shed.
Sasuke opened the door for Haruka, and she walked inside-while he remained leaning on the door. She dropped the bags onto the floor and began digging out the stuff one by one to put them away-even though most people just let the bags as is.
After a while, she noticed Sasuke got impatient with her because he but the stopper on the door down, and began to walk over to the bags. Haruka just smiled a little at his reluctance help-
BAM
BANG
Haruka quickly looked at the door and saw that the door stopper had snapped back up and-in response-the door shut back closed.
Immediately-after taking a look at her-Sasuke ran to the door, and tried to open the metal door back up. But it was locked from the outside.
"Damn it!" Sasuke explained, and turned back to face Haruka.
She began to shake uncontrollably, and stared at the door longer-harder-in hopes that it will magically open up. But it didn't, and she soon found herself looking to the floor-terrified to look at the door any longer.
As she stared down at the grey metal floor she began to become overly aware of just how small the shed was. The walls were too close together. There isn't enough air in a place like this.
She trembled more, and tried to breathe.
There's also too many things around her. Balls, nets, poles, etc. and they were just making the shed seem even smaller. There's not enough air in the room. There's also no way out.
She fell to her knees. "Haru!"
She can't escape. There's no way out. She could bang on the walls as much as she wants but they wouldn't budge. She could scream at them as much as she wanted but they wouldn't pity her.
She saw tears blur her vision, and she held onto herself tightly. "Damn it, where's my phone?"
She can't. She can't escape. She can't leave. And the airs getting lighter. She can barely breathe-even though she's trying so hard.
She couldn't stop her sobbing.
It's getting harder for her to breathe. It's getting tighter in the room. She can't pull herself together.
"Hey! We're stuck in here!"
She can't breathe. She can't escape. She can't escape. She can't breathe. She can't breathe. She can't breathe. She can't escape.
She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared. She's scared.
'Help. Me. Someone.'
. . . . . . . . . . . .
As soon as Itachi walked into the school-wondering where the guards or teachers were-he saw a red headed girl looking into one of the shoe lockers muttering to herself.
"Excuse me."
She shot up startled, and looked over to him. "I-I-I wasn't… Y-Yes?"
"Do you know where Sasuke and Haruka Uchiha are?"
They hadn't come back home yet, and their parents were beginning to worry-him as well.
She shut the locker shut, and just looked at him. "Um… I don't know where Sasuke is, but I think Haruka is-maybe-in the equipment shed. J-Just a guess. I mean, they still haven't left school yet either."
Almost immediately the worst case scenario popped into his mind, and Itachi was suddenly afraid for Haruka's sake.
"Do you have a key to it?" He knew his tone was getting a little demanding, but he didn't care-not with a familiar memory playing in his head.
She suddenly looked a little terrified. "Y-Yes, but why-"
"Give them to me, now."
She shut her mouth tight and just nodded.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Haruka was curled up into a ball tightly as she tried to sit as far away from anything as possible, but even then she continued to struggle for air. Her chest began to constrict on itself, and she became more terrified.
She truly felt as though she were going to either die lack of oxygen, or the walls were going to come together and crush her. It was out of her control. She was just falling more and more into her own fears and she knew it, but she couldn't save herself from them either.
For a split second she thought she could see a metal wall only an inch away from her face-
"Sasuke! Haruka!"
Her eyes snapped open to the sound of her name, and she looked desperately at the door as she heard rattling of keys.
"Haruka!"
She knew this voice well, too well.
Without second thought she got up to her feet, and ran straight to the door, and banged on it with her shaking fist. "OPEN THE DOOR! PLEASE!"
Tears continued to stream down her face as she heard the turning of a key, and she trembled more and more-her knees threatening to buckle and let her fall back to the floor.
Then, the door began to open, and Haruka shoved it open. And, with a mind blurred with familiar fears, jumped right at the figure that stood outside. She desperately grabbed hold of him, and-with his familiar scent burning into her nose-cried and cried into his chest.
She didn't feel it as he began to sit down onto the floor-taking her with him. All she could understand was his scent, his comforting voice, his gentle caresses, and that through it all she desperately clung to him for support. For reassurance that she's really been saved.
She didn't want to let him go because she was terrified he'd go.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
He just looked down at her with shadowed eyes as he continued to try telling her over and over again "You're safe now, it's ok."
"Sasuke, how long were you in there?" Itachi didn't look at Sasuke as he stood over them.
There was a short silence that showed just how worried he was over Haruka. "…Nearly an hour."
Itachi pressed his lips together for a moment before going back to what he was doing.
He just stared down at her curled up form, and he felt his insides ripping apart. She was so lost into her own fears that she put aside her cold act just to feel better, just to make sure she really is safe. And his arms naturally tightened around her just a bit more.
She cried and cried and cried-undoubtedly replaying some memories she won't realize are memories.
He didn't want to think about it. He didn't want to remember that day ever again. It was a horrible day to him and even worse for his little sister. Even now, as he looked down at her-sixteen years old-all he could see was that five year old that truly believed she had almost died. She was so small that day, and she clung to him with the same desperation that she was right now. And he just felt horribly sick to his stomach.
His precious little sister-that he loved so much-had once again fallen to more terror than she deserved, and it was his fault.
"It's ok Haruka, it's ok."
. . . . . . . . . . . .
She banged on the walls constantly with her hands so closely kept to her sides. Left, right, and right in front of her, but there wasn't a respond. She tried over and over to scream, but there was no replay.
Haruka tried over and over and over again but no one is saving her. 'No one is saving me! Why won't they let me out?! Can't they hear me?! Why aren't they listening?! Why?! Can't they see I can't breathe?! Do they want me to die?! WHY?! WHY?! WHY?!'
The only response she got was a loud bang on one of the walls, and a twisted laugh of a grown man.
Haruka woke up with a snap, and shot up. Sweat dripping down her chin, and forming at her brow.
She panted loudly, trying to comprehend why she was no longer in a metal box… And she realized it's because she's no longer trapped in her dream.
Haruka looked down at her hands as they grabbed onto her sheets tightly, and she slowly willed herself to let go. She looked at her hands and only half expected to see sores from banging on the walls in her dream.
She figured she had that dream because of her panic attack only a few hours ago… The only thing she could be grateful out of today is that neither of her…brothers told their parents what happened, and just said her and Sasuke were kept busy with club activities…
…Over and over, she mentally slapped herself for what happened. She knew she was just drunk under fear of her own phobia, but she still… She was still…! She didn't know anymore, and she was too tired to figure it out.
All she knew was that she somehow, specifically, yearned for his touch and embrace… It was almost as though she couldn't believe she were safe if she didn't…
But, at the moment, that wasn't was made her feel sick. It was that-for some God knows reason-she expected that at any moment he was going to walk right into her room, and hold her-the same as he did earlier until she realized what she was doing and pushed him away… … … … … ...
. . . . . . . . . . . .
Sasuke only had to look at her once-head down with blankets and a pillow tightly in her grasp-before moving aside and letting her walk into his room.
He closed the door, and watched her as she began to lay out the blankets on the floor, and curl herself into them-her head resting quietly on her pillow.
After, a moment, Sasuke walked back to his bed, and went under his own sheets.
"Goodnight." He didn't expect a reply, and he didn't get one.
A part of him knew that she was going to come to his room tonight. When Itachi used to live with them, she'd usually do this about twice a month…
He didn't want to think about today-about how powerless he felt when his sister was having a break down-he didn't want to think about how she shut herself in her room as soon as they got home, he especially didn't want to think about how pathetically she held onto Itachi-as though he were her only source of living.
But, for some reason, he did think tiredly about the first time she wanted to sleep in his room-back when they were eight.
That was the day they both confessed about their broken hearts, about their unrequited loves, and when Haruka last cried in from of him.
…He quietly reached onto his bedside stand, and pulled in his phone to him. He turned it on and began going through his photo album. He found the picture he was looking for.
It was taken during a school trip-he didn't remember to where and he didn't care much to remember. It was taken at a beach, and it had two girls in it-both fully clothed.
His sister with her hair up and smiling brightly at the camera-she hadn't smiled like that in a while-wearing her Death Note T-Shirt.
And, Hinata. She was-of course-shyly smiling at the camera with a shine in her eyes. She had her hair down, and it lightly blew in the wind-he remembered. She was wearing that white sundress, and his jacket-not because she was cold, because the dress was a little see through.
He stared at her longer and longer, and felt a slight stung again when he remembered where Naruto told him he was going. He wanted to go visit his sick friend, but he didn't want to see her flustered over him again. He's already seen it enough times to last a life time.
He could remember when she nearly tripped when he walked with them to school. When she dropped her books when he said 'hi' to her in the hallways. When she stuttered when he asked her if she liked Natsu or Gray better. Since they were kids to only yesterday, it's been painted clear as day who she preferred, who lurked in her mind, who she dreamed about, and who she loved.
But he loved her, and Naruto didn't.
He was always the one that defended her against people who talked down to her. He was the one that talked to her about her father when she was sad. He was the one that tried to give her whatever would make her smile. He was the one that would give leg and arm just so that she wouldn't cry. He was the one that was by her side since they were kids.
It was always Him, Sasuke. So then why was it Naruto?
The sad part was that he couldn't even hate Naruto for it. He tried to when they were kids, but the more they were together the more he couldn't. He's an idiot sure, but he's still…his friend… The friend that stole the girl he loves without even knowing it.
Sasuke really did love Hinata, ever since they were kids. He loved her innocence, gentleness, shyness, and even the way she spoke. She's kind at heart, and doesn't give up. She would try her hardest for almost anyone else's sake, and never regret it. She's… She's his perfect little angel, but she's also not his.
She could never be his.
He's tried again and again to have her see him, but eleven years is enough time to realize that it's hopeless…
'We're both doomed to love the wrong people, Haru.' He turned off his phone and shoved it under his pillow, and tried to sleep.
. . . . . . . . . . . .
He looked down at his cards and decided he didn't have enough purples. So, he looked up at Shisui. "You win." Itachi didn't feel bad about it because he still won the last three games.
Shisui grew a big smile and threw his cards over his shoulder, and they slowly fell down to the streets.
'Maybe playing on top of the Empire State Building wasn't a good idea.'
"I don't want to play anymore, Itachi." Shisui said with a big smile on his face.
Itachi blinked at him a few times before just smiling back. "Ok, then what do you want to do?"
"I want to talk."
"What about?" He looked to the side and realized a cloud was right next to his head.
"I want to talk about Haru."
Itachi's eyes slightly widened and he looked at his friend confused, and noticed his eyes were missing-leaving only black holes. "What about Haruka?"
"She was scared again today wasn't she?" Shisui's smile was no longer there, and even without eyes, Itachi could tell he was glaring at him. "Why weren't you there for her? Don't you care about her?"
Itachi got up on his feet, feeling either angry or hurt. "Of course I do!"
"Then why weren't you there for her? She kept crying for you, but you weren't there."
"I-"
"Onii-chan!"
He froze when he heard it. The familiar cry of his little sister. He spun around and saw a dark tunnel, and at the end of it, there was his five year old sister balling her eyes out.
Her hands were over her eyes, and her red tears trickled down her little cheeks. Her raven black hair was cut short messily, and her school uniform was torn and dirtied.
"Onii-chan!"
"Haruka!" He immediately ran into the tunnel and tried to reach her.
"Onii-chan! I'm scared! I'm scared! They're scary!"
He tried to reach her, but no matter how fast he ran he couldn't get to her. He tried to run faster and faster and faster, but she still remained too far.
"Onii-chan! Why aren't you here?! Why aren't you saving me?!"
"Haruka, I'm trying-!"
Then, in a split second, she was right in front of him. But she was now sixteen and-like Shisui-her eyes were missing.
"But, Itachi, you were too late."
He woke up with a startle, and for a few seconds, found it hard to breathe.
Even after realizing that it was only a dream the words that eyeless-Haruka told him still played over in his head. And soon he remembered her curled up to him crying her eyes. Both times.
Ever since that day, so long ago, he's always known it was his fault. She had tried over and over to call for him, but he didn't listen, and he failed her. To this day he still blames himself for it all.
From her tears to her PTSD-or claustrophobia like she thinks. He even blamed himself for all those night terrors she had after words. The only thing he has to be grateful for is that she's still here and that she blocked that memory out a long time ago.
'…It is my fault.'
He rolled over to his side, and looked to his side, remember the tiny body curled up to him after waking from those nightmares.
'But she never blamed me for it…'
…He does love Haruka, she's his little sister. He loved to the absolute core.
She was always to sweetest thing, and she always gave a smile to anyone she could. She was strong and worked harder than anyone. She was always mature for her age, and naturally had a motherly charm to her. She looked for the best in anyone. And everyone loved her for it-and they still do according to Sasuke.
Haruka has always been the sister he loved and cherished. No matter how much she's changed, he still loves her like any brother should. He really did.
Even now, sixteen years old, every time he looked at her he could still only see that little girl that he adored. She's his little sister, and he has to protect her-even if he didn't do it right back then…
He'll always be there as he brother. He'll always love her more than anything. And she'll keep getting older-but still be his baby sister-and she'll succeed in life. She'll go to great schools, have a great job, and soon have kids of her own. Her kids will be beautiful, and he knows she'll raise them perfectly.
And he'll be with her. He'll make sure to always be there for her. Because he loves her-so much.
He's her brother after all.
(AN) Yes, this was a long chapter, but I felt like I kind of owed it. I also just had a lot of things that I wanted to show here, and it just became longer than I thought. AND, I know what all of you are thinking, and YES… Naruto's parents are alive. :)