Chapter Four: I Know a Place Where No One's Lost
Danny sits at the table, his eyes watching his family as they move through their usual morning routines. His sister is studying for a test she has three weeks from now, his mom is cooking breakfast and topping a pile of eggs and bacon with some hot fudge for his chocolate addict of a father, and his dad is rapidly talking about some new invention. Danny smiles and nods, pretending to listen to his father and paying just enough attention to be able to ask a question here or there about the "Fenton Ghost Zapper!" or whatever the name of the new invention is.
Today is going to be difficult, or so he thinks. He knows where he needs to go, but getting there will be close to impossible. It means skipping school—something he's well-accustomed to doing but less able to get away with now that his parents are aware of his ghost half—and getting through the Fenton Portal without either of his parents noticing or stopping him. It means going ghost and dealing with the pain it brings until he can make it through the Ghost Zone to where he needs to go, and it means avoiding all of his enemies in the process.
Yet Danny has spent all night preparing for this, and his plan is already in action. After his father finishes off his description of his new weapon with a "Pretty cool, eh?" Danny smiles.
"Yeah, Dad, that sounds really good," he replies as he heads over to the fridge, and opening the door he makes a show of looking around for a minute. "Huh, that's weird. We're out of fudge."
"We're out of what now?" exclaims Jack, jumping to his feet and pushing past his son, and looking through the fridge for his fudge like an addict searching for his next fix, Jack turns to Maddie, eyes full of horror. "Mads, this is unacceptable! We'll have to go to the store right away!"
"But Jack—" she begins, but Jack is already on his way out the door, keys to the Fenton RV in hand, and she sighs heavily as she shakes her head and then smiles back at her son. "Do you want a ride to school, Danny?"
"Are you serious?" scoffs Jazz, making it possible for him to avoid telling his parent's another lie (since, unbeknownst to his mother and father, they have plenty of fudge hidden upstairs in Danny's room). "No way. I can drive him. The last thing he needs is more damage to his psyche thanks to Dad's insane driving."
"Well . . . okay, sweetie," agrees their mother reluctantly as his father leans on the horn, and jumping she shakes her head and smiles. "I'm coming, Jack!" Turning back to her kids, she walks over to Danny and gently kisses him on the forehead, ignoring the way he flinches at her touch.
"I'm sorry," he mumbles nevertheless, and his mom shakes her head.
"It's okay, honey," she tells him, and for the first time Danny sees something in her eyes like the love and acceptance that used to be there before she found out about the lies, about his ghost half and about the way that he hid it even as she and Jack hunted him ruthlessly. The look, however, doesn't last, and in moments she's gone and Danny can't help but think, 'Two down, one to go' as the RV pulls away.
He's about to move onto the next part of his plan when his sister suddenly starts to hum something, and much to his shock, it's a very familiar yet unfamiliar tune. It's the song that he's never heard before but the same one that's been stuck in his head for weeks, and as he listens to his sister hum it, he can't help but stare at her.
"Jazz?" he whispers faintly, his voice shaking. "That song . . . what is it?"
"Huh?" she starts, snapping her eyes up to him, and then she chuckles softly. "Seriously, Danny, you need to listen to more than Dumpty Humpty. It's from Les Misérables."
"From Miserable what now?" he repeats.
"It's a musical, Danny," she sighs irritably.
"Uh-huh . . ." says Danny, staring at his sister. "You say that like it's something everyone should know or something."
"Most people do, little brother," she grumbles. "At least anyone cultured."
"Hence why I've never heard of it," he grins, and she shakes her head in dismay. Teasing his sister, however, isn't going to get him the answers that he wants. "What's the name of that song?"
"It's called 'Castle on a Cloud,'" she answers slowly, staring at him curiously, for most of the time her brother would sooner ignore ninety percent of the music she likes and there's a strange look in his eyes as he asks that makes her think there's something more to this. "Why, Danny? Does it mean something to you?"
For a moment he's not sure if he wants to tell her or not—after all, it might mess up his plans—but ultimately he plunges forward anyway. "Because I've had that stupid song stuck in my head ever since I got back," he replies, "and I have this feeling like it connects to my lost memories somehow. But it doesn't make sense! What the hell would some song from a musical that I've never even seen before have to do with anything?"
"Because . . ." begins Jazz slowly, and she looks horrified as she speaks, as if she's drawing the truth out of a dark, deep well that holds nothing but poison, "Danny, I don't know if it matters . . . I hope it doesn't matter, but . . ."
"What?" he presses, losing his patience, but she still says nothing and so he pushes a little harder, snapping at her, "Damn it, Jazz, just tell me!"
"Mom . . . she didn't really know any lullabies when we were little," Jazz explains reluctantly, her voice quiet and thoughtful. "One of her friends—it might've even been Vlad, you know how weird he is—made her a tape, and I guess that one was her favorite because she used to sing it to you all the time when you were a baby. You were really little when she stopped singing it, though, so you probably don't even remember it anymore . . . I wonder if she still has that tape somewhere?"
"So . . . what does that mean?" he asks slowly as he tries to digest the new information, but Jazz is a lot better at this sort of thing so he lets her take the lead. It seems as if she already has some idea about what the possibilities for this are, after all, since she didn't want to tell him the truth.
"I'm not sure, Danny, but what if mom's involved in whatever happened to you?" asks Jazz nervously. "I mean, we didn't really think about it before, but maybe your memories aren't the only ones that have been affected. Maybe ours have been, too, and we just didn't notice because it was less obvious."
"Or maybe it just means that Vlad's involved in all of this somehow if Mom did get that tape from him," thinks Danny, not wanting to believe that his family's minds might have been tampered with as well, yet the thought of Vlad being involved is hardly comforting, either. It's a troubling thought, mostly because it opens up a whole realm of possibilities that Danny's long since dismissed. "And if you were humming it, then maybe you were there for—for whatever it was, too."
"The musical it comes from is pretty famous, little brother," says Jazz with a faint smile, "and I've been listening to the soundtrack a lot lately while studying, so that song being stuck in your head might have nothing to do with me unless I'm also right about something being messed up with my memories, too. The whole thing is just a little too coincidental for there not to be a connection between your lost memories and Mom or me, though. It's still possible that you might be right about Vlad, but he doesn't strike me as the kind of man who goes to musicals because he likes them. I think he goes because he's rich and because he thinks it'll make Mom like him more if he seems classier."
"You're probably right about that," he mumbles, thinking about the fruitloop for a moment. "But I'd rather this all have something to do with Vlad than you or Mom."
"Me, too, Danny," admits Jazz.
Silence falls between the two of them as they consider what this new information means, but ultimately, neither one comes up with an answer and so Danny decides that he's just going to stick to his original plan. Biting his lower lip, he resists the urge to rub the back of his neck—it's a nervous habit his sister is well-aware of, and more than likely it'll make her think something's up if he does it—as he forces himself to speak up. "Hey, Jazz? Do you think that maybe I could skip school today?"
"Danny, I don't think that skipping school is going to help us figure this out any faster," she says. "And maybe Sam and Tucker will have some ideas that could help us, like . . . like if there was a production of the musical in town or somewhere nearby around the time you disappeared and that's where you were captured by someone, then Tucker would probably be able to help us find that information pretty quickly."
"It's not that! I'm just . . . I slept pretty badly last night," he replies, and it's not as if he's lying. He barely slept at all, between the nightmares and the incident with Desiree. "And I feel kind of sick, too. I think I just need a day to catch up on sleep. Do you think mom and dad'll be mad?"
"Oh, Danny . . ." Jazz sighs as she begins packing her books and assignments. "I know that it must be tough getting back to a normal routine again, but it's really better if you stick to it, and if you're absent then the school will end up calling Mom and Dad and we'll both get in trouble for it. You should have asked Mom before she left."
"I know," he admits, looking down at the table sheepishly, and he feels a little guilty about what he's going to say next but he knows that it's too important. And ultimately, if his sister says no, then he'll end up skipping later anyway. "I guess I was just worried she'd say no for all the reasons that you just said. But I'm not lying, Jazz. I'm really just feeling kind of lousy today and I was hoping to get some sleep. Trust me, I'm not going to make this a habit, okay? Please, Jazz?"
"Well . . . okay, Danny," agrees Jazz at last. "You stay home and get some sleep, and I'll cover for you at school and let Sam and Tucker know where you are. But don't even think about asking me to cover for you again tomorrow. If you want to skip again, next time you've got to go through Mom first, okay, little brother?"
"Seriously?" he exclaims, his eyes shining as he looks up, and if not for the horrifyingly dark circles there or the pale cast to his face Jazz might have believed he was lying to her. Yet before she can follow this line of reasoning, her brother jumps to his feet and throws his arms around her, embracing her tightly. "Thanks, Jazz."
"No problem, Danny, but I'm serious. If I find out that you're running around chasing down our mayor and asking him all kinds of crazy questions today instead of taking a nap, then there's going to be hell to pay when I get back," she replies sternly, yet she's hugging him back and there's no flinching, no pulling away or uneasiness there. It's the first real hug they've shared since he returned, and Jazz is simply too happy to question it or press her brother about his desire to stay home. It's not as if he doesn't look tired, after all, and so with a smile she forces down her uneasy feeling and decides to just trust that her brother isn't up to anything. "I have to get going. Do you think you'll be okay on your own for a minute?"
"I'm inside the Fenton Fortress, Jazz," he chuckles, gesturing to their house as he smiles at her and dons his mask. "I'll be fine."
"Still . . . be careful, okay, baby brother?" she tells him as she shoulders her backpack, and he nods, watching her as she walks out the door. Waiting until he hears the sound of her car pulling away, Danny quickly changes forms and then descends through the floor and into the lab since he knows that his parents will be back soon and he can't afford to get caught by them here. With the single touch of a finger, the portal doors spring open, and Danny flies into the ghost zone.
The trip seems to take an eternity, but Danny is grateful that there's no trouble on his journey beyond a close encounter with Johnny 13 and Kitty. The two ghosts, however, are too busy arguing with each other to notice Danny's presence, and after they pass out of sight he continues on to his destination. At long last he arrives at the ancient clock tower, home to his mentor and ally, and without bothering to knock (for the Master of Time knows all), Danny walks into the tower and heads to the viewing room since it's where Clockwork tends to spend most of his day.
As he grows closer, he can hear a voice, and much to his surprise and embarrassment, it turns out that voice is his. He knows that Clockwork must be playing a scene from his past (or perhaps future), and as Danny grows closer, he begins to make out the words. It's only when he's just outside the room that he realizes he just keeps on hearing the same sentence over and over again since the image from his past is stuck on repeat.
"Please, just make it all go away!"
A chill runs through Danny, then, and as he steps into the room, the screen freezes. Glancing up at it, Danny sees an image of himself, and although he can't be sure since his memories are gone, instinctively he knows it's a scene from his missing past. The image is horrifying, for he's covered in ectoplasm and blood, the top of his jumpsuit is shredded, and his normal otherworldly glow is faint, almost nonexistent. His glowing green eyes are red and swollen as tears stream down his pale cheeks, and the present Danny's eyes widen as he studies the image of his past self. He wants to ask what it is, what it means, but the words won't come for he's transfixed by how badly injured his past self is, and it can't help but make him believe his present self shouldn't exist at all. It's only when the screen suddenly flickers and turns into a swirling green fog that he's able to look away, and floating nearby is the Master of All Time.
Clockwork.
And the first words out of Danny's mouth surprise even himself, if only because he can barely believe it even as his instincts scream that he's right. "You're the one who made Desiree erase my memories, aren't you?"
"Yes."
A/N: I actually agonized over what song it would be. I had a few different ideas about it, but I always knew that the song had to meet some basic criteria. For example, Danny couldn't have heard it before or at least couldn't remember hearing it before, even if it was vaguely familiar to him for some reason (which ruled out more of the songs I had in mind than I would've liked); it had to be about two decades or so old given the date the show originally premiered; and it had to be something that could be used as lullaby but, again, wasn't typically used that way otherwise he might've heard it. Ultimately, I went with the Les Mis song, but I'm still not sure if I'm happy with that choice . . . Meh.
And for the curious, yes, Vlad gave Maddie the tape. Giving someone who's just had a baby a tape with some lullabies on it actually isn't an uncommon gift, or, y'know, at least wasn't when tapes were still commonly used, and it seems like the kind of thing he'd offer her when she had a baby given the effects that music can have on babies (and I imagine he'd want to show up Jack by offering slightly "classier" lullabies than "Baa Baa Black Sheep" or something). At the very least, that's how I'm explaining it here since I'm assuming that even though they rarely saw each other before the reunion, rarely doesn't equal never and the big events in Maddie's life, at least, were things that he'd pay attention to since he still had a crush on her (re: obsession with her). There's more to the song, but it'll be a little bit longer before you guys get to find out what.
But now you guys know a couple of things, right? And yes, I'm a jerk. I ended up stopping the chapter here because it felt like the appropriate place to end it (even if the chapter came out a bit short again because of it). Don't worry, though, I won't leave you waiting for very long. Expect an update within the next couple of days, 'cause the rest of what was originally going to be the second part of this chapter is already written and is just in need of some serious editing before I post it. ;)
And, as always, thanks to everyone who reviewed last chapter, and I hope that you will take a minute to leave a review after this one as well.
'Til next time!