The Lovegood Experiments

Chapter 4 – Getting Things Sorted

Disclaimer: I own nothing…

Luna had had a nice ride on the Hogwarts Express. After making sure that Harry had made it safely onto the platform, she had said goodbye to her father and found an empty compartment on the train. The ride itself was fairly boring. Not many people came in to introduce themselves, not after Luna had told the first two that they would die unfortunate deaths because there was a large infestation of poogles in their trunks. Poogles were attracted to folded purple and orange clothing, everyone knew that. Why did they seem so confused? It was so much fun to be insane!

When the train arrived at Hogsmeade Station, Luna made the last minute decision to not follow Hagrid but instead join Harry, Hermione, and Ron in their thestral driven carriage. Not that they would know, of course.

Meanwhile, Harry, Hermione, and Ron made their way over to the carriages that were to carry all returning students to the castle. They had just said hello to Hagrid (who was going on about some new beast named Snuggles) and thought they saw an empty carriage. Once comfortably inside, they began discussing what would happen this year. The possibilities seemed to be getting more and more ludicrous as time passed but, eventually, they reached the front doors of the castle. The first years were almost reaching the end of their glorious boat ride and had obviously just spotted Hogwarts castle for the first time, judging by the gasps of amazement.

Harry, Ron, and Hermione looked at each other and smiled. Even after having lived in the castle for one school year, it was a beautiful thing to return to. Behind them, Luna also smiled. It would be different this time.

"Can't we just skip the sorting?" Ron whined, "I'm hungry."

"No, Ronald," Hermione was truly trying not to get angry with him. Honestly, the boy just didn't understand some things!

By now, the trio had reached the Great Hall with the rest of the returning students and sat down at the Gryffindor table. The sorting would soon begin.

"What are you doing over here? I thought you were a first year!" Harry suddenly exclaimed. Darn, she would have to spy on them later. Maybe from the inside…

"What's going on, Harry?" Ron and Hermione immediately began looking around for a man in a turban or a certain hook-nosed, greasy haired potions professor. Just because he wasn't actually the one to steal the stone did not mean he was automatically their favorite person in the castle.

Luna decided to give a straight answer to Harry's question. "No- oh wait- that was the nargles speaking. I am a first year at Hogwarts School of Pac Man and Pinball." Well, obviously not too straight.

Fred and George Weasley, the self- acclaimed best pranksters since the Marauders, who had been listening in for the past few minutes, made themselves known by using their trademark "prank."

"Who do we have here, Gred?"

"Well, I certainly don't – wait a second, you're Forge!"

"Am not, you are."

"No, no, no my dear twin, I most definitely am not."

"How about this, you can both be Fudge," the so far unnamed Luna said.

"Fudge is an idiot," Harry tried to tell her but looked confused. Who on earth was Fudge and why did Harry think him to be an idiot?

"Right you are, Harry," the twins intoned simultaneously, "Fudge is an idiot. What a novel idea!" They turned to look at each other and yelled out "Fudge!"

Harry was just about to ask the twins how he could possibly know the idiot Fudge when Professor McGonagall hurried through the doors to the Great Hall followed by the first years. From what she told Dumbledore, one of the first years seemed to be missing. Harry turned accusingly to Luna only to find the space that she had previously occupied was empty.

After recounting the first year students seven times and finding that the correct number was there, the sorting ceremony commenced. Harry and Ron immediately began talking about Quidditch strategies to use this year, only paying a bit of attention when one "Lovegood, Luna" was sorted into Gryffindor.

"I figured she would be a Ravenclaw," Harry told his friends quietly.

"Oh, really, Harry! She's crazy!" Hermione was quick to tell him.

"I know, but for some reason…" he trailed off, not knowing why exactly she seemed to be a Raven.

AN: Sorry for the wait, but since I don't ever listen to writers' excuses, I won't put any here. Although I do have some good ones…