When I said a character was going to show up who happens to be very dear to me, some of you should have known who it was.

Disclaimer: Digimon, not mine.

"So, let me get this straight," Jun quirked an eyebrow as she asked Natsuko the reason for the late night visit while she finished preparing refreshments for everyone present, "you want me to slay Hikari?"

Natsuko blinked as Jun handed her a vanilla milkshake, and was silent for a moment while she waited for the young woman to join her in sitting on one of the couches that were around the coffee table of the apartment. Jun's eyebrow was still quirked as she waited for an answer, but Natsuko couldn't help but be distracted and kept stealing glances at Jun's extremely creepy digimon partner, even as the woman finally sat down and joined them.

She watched as Jun handed a milkshake over to the clown digimon and how she held onto the last one for herself. The clown was reading John Milton's Paradise Lost for a book club he was apparently in, and honestly seemed to be minding his own business apart from grunting in satisfaction when he tasted the drink that Jun had gotten him, but there was something oddly familiar about the creature that Natsuko couldn't quite place her finger on. She didn't really know why, but the woman felt the need to perhaps stress the fact that she wanted Hikari to, well, not die.

"Obviously I don't want the girl dead." the woman emphasized, Natsuko actually being sincere about that particular fact, despite what others might think.

"You said that you needed me to take drastic measures."

"Yeah, and by that I meant that I needed you to make her think that she's fat or something like that."

Jun narrowed her eyes suspiciously at the Takaishi matriarch, and then shared a glance with the Piemon who had looked up from the book he was reading before she focused back on the woman. "So you want me to crush her spirit?"

Natsuko shook her head because although she did want to crush Hikari just a little bit, maybe just crush her spleen or pancreas metaphorically speaking, but crushing her spirit was perhaps just the tiniest bit extreme. "No, that's a bit too much I think. Maybe bring her to the point of tears of frustration perhaps, but not to the point of actually crying."

Jun's face remained stoic as she considered her current options. She looked back over at the Piemon that had been her partner ever since he showed up with a suitcase at her front door, and when after a minute or so he just shrugged and went back to reading, Jun took a long drink from her milkshake before replying Natsuko.

"Woman, you're really breaking my digimon's balls here if you expect us to take out Hikari without making her cry or anything else of that nature."

Before the older woman could respond, Piemon gave a defeated sigh since he was sick of the fact that humans apparently couldn't comprehend the simple rules that digimon biology adhered to.

"I don't have balls. Digimon don't actually reproduce since the way that we're born involves a perpetual cycle of reincarnation instead of anything else, so I actually don't have any sort of genitalia or sexual organs. Although I am humanoid in appearance, there is no reason for me to have anything of the sort like you humans do since, again, reincarnation. If not for the Darwinian evolution that so many of you humans insist is real, then for the fact that this is the way that I am programmed considering the fact that I, like all digimon, am made up of data."

As Natsuko was about to say something again, this time she was interrupted by a curious sounding Jun. "Then why does Angewoman have giant voluptuous breasts? I ask because if digimon don't reproduce sexually or nurse their young, then aren't breasts pointless to them?"

The virus digimon just waved it off. "Because she's hot?"

After a few minutes of back and forth between Jun and her digimon pal, Natsuko couldn't help but simply watch in bewilderment as the two continued to discuss the more intimate and curious notions of digimon biology and the sociological imagination. She didn't interrupt at first since she didn't want to be rude, but after taking a look at her watch and frowning since she had hoped that she would already be on her way back to Takeru's home by this particular time at night, Natsuko coughed to get their attention.

She was about to bring up the reason she was there in the first place, but felt a shiver go up her spine when Piemon proceeded to sneeze and when, with the sneeze, the sound of tormented screams filled the room. "I don't want to sound rude or anything, but does your digimon always have to be so creepy? I'm pretty sure that instead of farting he releases ominous Latin chanting every time he makes a bowel moment."

Jun just shrugged. "Some people get adorable pig-bats like Patamon, or even talking cats that have sass going on in all the right places. It's not my fault that I got stuck with Stephen King's It over here."

"I didn't ask to be your partner either!" the digimon in question protested.

"See what I have to deal with? I mean, I can handle the nightmarish and hellish visions of the tragedies that are yet to pass in the world that I get since I sleep under the same roof as the Joker here, and I can deal with the fact that every time someone accidentally bumps into him while out doing errands that they are forever cursed by disturbing imagery of the moment of their deaths, but he's not the least bit grateful that I provide for him!"

Piemon just rolled his eyes, since he was doing just fine before he was assigned to pal around with Jun for the past decade. "I can catch my own food, you know."

"Homeless people don't count as food."

"Whatever." Piemon scoffed and turned his head to the side, sounding like a petulant preteen girl who was just told by her parents that she was still too young to have a boyfriend.

Not liking that her digimon was acting like a brat, Jun reached over to the coffee table, grabbed a magazine that was lying on it with the hand that wasn't holding onto her milkshake, and then rolled it up and proceeded to hit the mega-level digimon on the back of the head. "Get a job."

The two began arguing again, and Natsuko rubbed her temples for a moment because she thought that she was going to end up getting a headache if she listened to them bicker any longer. Deciding it was best to change the topic to anything else just to stop the increasingly bothersome squabbling, Natsuko looked Jun and Piemon over, and a thought came to her when she saw the book that the digimon had resting in his lap.

"You know, Piemon, I too quite enjoyed John Milton's Paradise Lost."

At the moment where the digimon was going to yell at Jun that she wasn't his real father and thus couldn't order him around, he immediately became distracted by Natsuko when he found out that she too was a fan of one of his favorite works of literature, right after the 'Inferno' section of Dante Alighieri's Divine Comedy of course. "It is a lovely book, isn't it? I can really relate with the Satan character. He's a lovable rascal and seems like a very nice chap."

Instantly, she regretted using that particular book as the distraction. She really didn't have much to say to that, but it was then that it hit Natsuko where exactly she got the familiar feeling from Piemon from. "Didn't the kids fight a Piemon in their adventures in the digital world? I'm pretty sure that Takeru showed me a scene of that in the upcoming finale to his first trilogy."

The clown digimon coughed nervously and his eyes began to shiftily move from side to side as he gave his very unconvincing answer. "That was totally a different Piemon. If you didn't know, we're everywhere in the Digital World."

Before more questions could be asked about whether or not if he was the Piemon that the kids had apparently slain, the digimon gave a sigh of relief when Jun butted in and changed the topic. "Wait, did you say that there's going to be another trilogy after Digimon Adventure?"

"Yup," Natsuko confirmed, "it's going to be the trilogy where they dump all the characters that everyone has come to love and adore from Digimon Adventure into being background characters, and Takeru is going to shove your brother into the limelight for some reason to give him all the coolest scenes and digimon transformations."

"Strange."

"I know, right? At the moment his plan for it is for the second trilogy to be called Digimon Adventure 02, but I'm sure that he'll come up with something much more creative when the time comes."

Jun nodded her head, believing that Takeru was clearly creative enough to come up with a better title. "Hopefully he doesn't ruin the series that so many people have embraced all around the world."

"Well, the first trilogy right now is going to end with a beautiful and bittersweet moment where the kids not only grow stronger within themselves while at the same time they learn that everyone has to grow up eventually, but also in a way that leaves things ending on a poetically sad, but yet still oddly happy, moment."

"What about the second trilogy?"

"I'm not sure since he hasn't started writing it yet, but I'm sure he'll end it the same way, or perhaps he may even find a way to make the story even more beautiful."

Jun took a slurp of her milkshake before nodding once more, agreeing with Natsuko. "As long as he doesn't end the series with some crappy distant finale epilogue, I'm sure the fans will be pleased."

Remembering that she was there for a reason, Natsuko coughed, embarrassed that she had let herself become distracted after her goal was simply to distract someone else. "So, are you willing to help me out or not?"

Jun's face contorted in thought. "I don't know, Natsuko. I mean, I like Hikari. She seems like a nice gal."

"I thought you might say that," Natsuko quickly responded as she finally set her milkshake down and pulled out a check that she had prepared earlier out of her purse. After giving it one final look over to see that the money would most likely be sufficient, she handed it over to the young woman. "so I wrote this check out in your name beforehand."

Taking the check and eyes widening over the amount of money being offered, Jun greedily smiled. "Well, I don't like Hikari THAT much. I'm your woman as long as it doesn't interfere with my real job."

"You have a real job?" the older woman questioned, Jun not seeming like the type.

"I'm a linguistics professor." Jun confirmed.

"I wouldn't have thought that."

"Yup, I'm a badass genius with a great rack. So, how quickly do you want me to break up this engagement?"

"You misunderstand me, Motomiya. I don't want this wedding broken up, I just want you to make Hikari look bad. That, or hurt her feelings, but not too much. Either or is good for me."

"So, you want this wedding to go on then?"

Natsuko nodded. "She makes Takeru happy and for some reason he's in love with her. So yes, don't do anything that will break up this wedding."

Jun thought it was weird but figured that since she was getting paid that she wouldn't question it. Curious as to if her partner would be up for it, she looked over at her digimon. "You in to help me, Piemon?"

"Do we get to kill her?" Piemon questioned, hoping that the woman had changed her mind about that.

The woman watched as Jun and Piemon looked at her expectantly for confirmation, before she shook her head. "No. I would very much appreciate it if you didn't slaughter Hikari."

After a moment of thought, Piemon just shrugged since he figured that getting to make a young woman feel insecure about herself, while not as fun as the good ol' stabbity stab stab, was at least something. "I'm still in."

Glad that she was going to have help on her upcoming adventure, Jun stood up and announced, "From this moment forth, Takaishi Natsuko, I will insert myself into Hikari's life."

Elsewhere and across the city a young woman who was resting in bed with her fiance, each of them reading John Milton's Paradise Lost since that was what their book club was reading that month, felt a shiver go up her spine. Her name was Hikari and for some reason she felt cold all of a sudden.

"Is everything fine, dear?" Takaishi Takeru questioned as he kept his eyes on his book and not on his the bride-to-be.

"I just felt something evil happen."

"Last time you felt something 'evil'," Takeru made air quotes with his hands after he set down his book and looked over at Hikari, "it was just Patamon raiding the fridge after you put him on that diet. I'm starting to think that your light powers are getting kind of rusty."

"I'm serious, Takeru."

Takeru just sighed as he reluctantly rolled out of bed. "I'll check on Patamon."

If you count the Digimon CD dramas released in Japan as canon, I'm pretty sure they are, it is found out later that Jun eventually gets a digimon partner of her own, along with Iori's grandfather. Is that partner a Piemon? Haha, probably not, but I shrugged and decided to just go with it.

Next chapter will involve some warp digivolving.