Chapter 4
The kiss
Dan opened the door, and Phil stood up quickly, turning to face him. Dan's hair was messy, it looked like he had been running his hands through it. Phil couldn't think of what to say, it was the first time it actually hit him how… depressed Dan looked. His hair didn't look like its usual styled self, yet it wasn't his hobbit hair either. It was just messy. He had dark circles under his eyes, and he was more pale than usual. Phil didn't know what to say, so he threw himself into Dan's arms, and hugged him tight. He held him there for a minute, eyes screwed shut, and then he whispered into his ear "Whatever is making you sad, I'm sorry". He pulled away, and saw the single tear snaking its way past Dan's lips. His.. Why was this happening now? He needed to concentrate on Dan. He drew his eyes up to his friends again and said "Dan? Dan… please tell me" he was annoyed to hear his voice break. He had to keep it together, for Dan's sake. Dan whispered hoarsely "I doesn't matter" Phil's eyes widened and he replied seriously "Yes, it does". Dan sighed and said "There's nothing you can do Phil, I'm just… dealing with some stuff." Phil shook his head slightly and said " Then let me help you deal with them. Whats the problem?"
Dan looked into his eyes for a long time, savouring the view he hadn't had for a long time. His memory hadn't done Phil's eyes justice. They were so clear, bright and honest. A bit like Phil, really. Whats the problem? Him. Dan didn't know how he was going to get out of this, and he realised he didn't really want to. He wanted to tell Phil, he was sick of secrets. He was sick of lies. He was sick of wanting to hug feel tight and never let go, but not being able to. What was the point, he couldn't get out of it anyway. Phil knew there was something wrong; Dan obviously wasn't a good an actor as he thought he was. Good thing he hadn't chosen that career path.
Dan eventually spoke "You… I" and then he fell silent again. He couldn't think of a way to say it. He couldn't force the words out. He was so tired that he couldn't break down the walls he put up. Dan found himself in Phil's arms, and Phil was whispering to him "Me? I've done something?" he sounded hurt "What did I do? Tell me…. Dan, did I hurt you?" Dan still couldn't do it. He couldn't say it. Instead he tilted his head towards Phil's, and kissed him.