Disclaimer: Twilight is the property of Stephenie Meyer
I'd like to dedicate this chapter as usual to Noble and Nikki and also to Esme Rox My Sox and Iput. Thank you for the reviews, they keep me writing :)
Carlisle's package arrived and I received it without any embarrassing confrontations. With the package here Tobias and I could finally give into our urges. It was amazing to let go and enjoy the shivering rush, but afterwards was horrible.
Not because of the usual aftermath, I was used to that now, it was nothing. What I didn't like was the feeling of complete vulnerability I felt as I sat bleeding under the water. If the Volturi ever wanted to get rid of me now would be the time to do it. If they caught me asleep I'd wake and be ready to fight, but I couldn't fight them like this and Tobias would die trying to protect me.
The thought of it made me sob.
It will not come to that. Tobias thought and kissed my cheek.
I hope not, but you have to admit we're more or less sitting ducks here. I replied sadly.
Tobias was thoughtful for a moment before he responded.
I think we should limit our love making to when we can no longer hold back in order to reduce the number of times you ovulate and have to take this shower. He suggested.
Sounds good. I replied and leant my head back against his shoulder.
Tobias tightened his arms around me and I closed my eyes trying to draw as much strength as I could from being close to him. I tried to think of other things while I waited out that half hour that seemed worse than the first time I'd gone through it.
I was quick to wash up afterwards and I was sleeping against Tobias chest within half an hour hoping the fear of vulnerability would be enough to cool my hormones for the next month or two.
We were due in Court the next day and I dressed in the flowing purple dress that Aro had sent to me the night before. Tobias was once again in the dark robe of the guard.
I was feeling a little despondent this morning; part of it was trying to work out why I couldn't just have a guard robe. Did that mean that if I was ever sent out on a field mission I'd be cannon fodder? Would Aro ever trust me to work for him outside of Volterra? Now that was an interesting thought.
Tobias felt my anxiety and without a word he took my hand and kissed it lightly before placing his fingers gently to the ring on its leather cord around my neck. Then he placed his fingers gently beneath my chin before kissing me lightly on the lips.
I would rather not see you in these cursed robes. He thought to me.
But why am I dressed as a wife? I asked.
Just one of Aro's little fancies. There's no reasoning behind it other than he might think he's bestowing you with an honour. Either that or he just wants you to look pretty. Aro does admire style and since he has yet to see you in battle he sees you in the same role that the wives play.
"Eye candy?" I asked in disbelief.
"Eye candy." Tobias agreed.
"Well. Great." I said, not sure how I felt about that explanation. "Well come on, let's go rot a few eyeballs." I said sourly, grabbing his hand.
Tobias burst out laughing as I opened the door and I giggled in response as we stepped out into the corridor. It took us the entire walk to the audience chamber to regain our composure, but those severe double doors would have been enough to sober the laughing policeman.
"Hello Katy dear." A voice purred like an oil slick in my ear.
I felt Tobias tense beside me as I myself went on alert. I forced a smile to my face before turning around.
"Hello Darius, and please, call me Essie." I said in the friendliest voice I could muster.
"But I prefer Katy." He insisted, his red eyes drinking in the feminine cut of my dress.
"Katy is dead." I said firmly before turning around and opening the door to the audience chamber so Tobias wouldn't have time to respond. The last thing we needed was to antagonise a fully trained member of the Wolf Hunters.
We stepped inside and Aro greeted us with a smile and motioned us in. I went to take my place behind Marcus' throne as Tobias took his place next to Jane. The guard were in true formation today, ranging from light to dark and nearly all the robed members of the Volturi were here.
Aro waved his hand and Gianna stepped outside, then she returned leading a procession of people in grey trench coats. I quickly pulled down the heat since Miss Vampire was less likely to betray the sudden wave of terror I felt at seeing those coats as they'd torn Timmy apart.
They were led by a tall woman with long raven hair that fell about her in waves that danced when she moved. If it wasn't for the old Soviet great coat that she wore you could see her dancing by firelight, a mysterious Esmerelda, the Gypsy girl ready to steal the hearts of the men-folk with her wanton ways.
Aro greeted her warmly in Romanian or at least some Eastern European sounding language that I didn't understand. I reached my mind out for Tobias' so I could listen to the translation through his mind.
"Saskia my dear, I did not expect you back so soon."
"Master Aro, I have a task that I am unable to fulfil on my own. I require the aide of your gift." Her voice was deep and mysterious and I wanted her to speak English so I could hear if she had an accent or not.
"And who would you like me to read?" Aro asked with a smile.
Saskia nodded and stepped aside as two of the Wolf Hunters threw a girl to the floor. I felt my gut clench when I heard the quickening of her heart, this was a human girl all battered and bruised as she sat shivering on the floor. She was grubby, her blond hair was in greasy rattails hanging from her head and obscuring her face, as she remained in the subservient position the Wolf Hunters had left her in.
Everyone in the room fell silent and all that was to be heard were the whimpers of the girl. When the silence continued she looked up. Her right eye was swollen almost shut and her lip was thick. A trickle of dried blood ran in a trail from the corner of her mouth.
Under the grime there were signs of malnutrition, her cheeks sunken her good left eye looking a little too large for her gaunt face. Her skin was stretched along her cheekbones and you could see her ribs through her skin where it was visible through the too big armholes of the old basketball shirt she was wearing.
Then I saw something else, if you took away all the factors that screamed homeless beggar, this girl had been beautiful and possibly rich. Rich enough to afford a good haircut, although it was very nearly grown out now, it was the type that probably cost a hundred dollars just for a cut and blow dry. Two or three nails still bore the evidence of an expensive manicure and with more meat on her bones, filling out her cheeks and lips she would have been the very picture of the blond princess ready to be rescued.
So what had happened to turn her into this frightened fragile girl who was at this moment scraping her dirty hair back behind her ears in an effort to look more presentable.
When she noticed all the impassionate eyes watching her from statues she cringed once more.
"Where am I?" She asked, she was speaking Swedish and I was getting the translation from Tobias once more. "Who are you? What do you want?"
"Quiet filth!" Caius snapped and slapped the girl across the face.
I leapt from where I was standing and stood between Caius and the girl.
"What did you do that for?" I demanded before I could stop myself. "She hasn't done anything wrong."
"You would protect your own." Caius snarled reverting to English.
"What?" I asked, frowning.
"She is a werewolf Essie." Aro said sounding a little amused and I wasn't sure if it was me or Caius who was the source of his humour.
"But…" I sniffed at the girl. "But she smells human." I protested.
Somebody laughed, it was the raven haired Saskia.
"They don't in the day silly girl." She said in English that held no accent at all. "The Children of the Night only show their true scent when in wolf form. Not like your little tribe of mutants who smell all the time."
Tobias gave a low warning growl but I smiled at him and winked.
He settled back but he didn't look happy. But I didn't want him happy right now, I wanted him to be calm and not start needless trouble.
I turned to Saskia and striated to my full height and looked down at her since a quick glance at her mind had informed me that she liked the fact that she was six foot two in her heels cause it made her feel more domineering when she looked down at her subordinates.
"We are not mutants." I said happily. "And I happen to like our earthy smell, shows we're one with nature."
Saskia gave me a calculating look but I turned from her before she could make her comeback.
"Master Aro, even if the girl is a werewolf surely she does not deserve to be treated like this? By all accounts that I know of, the Children of the Moon don't remember their wolf side when the moon's not out."
Aro looked thoughtfully into my eyes and I got a sudden glimpse of the glacial precision with which his mind thought. I resisted the urge to shudder and to turn my eyes away as I reeled my mind back in.
"I think there has been enough violence shown to this girl without proper conviction." Aro said to the clear disappointment of the others. "What is it that this girl has been accused of because really if her crime is being a Child of the Moon then why was she not dealt with when you found her?"
I knelt down beside the girl and offered her my hand.
"We have reason to believe she is part of pack." Saskia answered, the vampires keeping to English now since it was the only language they thought I knew.
I stopped in my effort to help the girl sit.
"But the Children of the Moon don't form packs. They're lone wolves, that's why they're dangerous. A lone wolf always goes mad without the pack to remind them how to behave." I stated.
"They don't usually form packs, but every so often you'll find a cluster of them. They usually end up tearing one and other to shreds, but not before wreaking havoc in the surrounding communities." Saskia said, speaking to me as if I was merely a trainee who needed teaching rather than something that was beneath her now.
I liked that, she'd had the initial reaction to me, I was a filthy dog, but since this filthy dog seemed to want to learn something then teach it.
"Safety in numbers." I said as I put my arm around the girl.
Saskia nodded.
"So I take you want the location of her pack." I said.
"Yes." Saskia said, directing her answer to Aro.
"I will look." He said and placed his hand to the girl's cheek.
The girl flinched slightly but seemed to relax when Aro merely held his hand to her cheek. His face was motionless at first, then he closed his eyes as if to get a better read. But as far as I knew he got all the thoughts at once and then he sifted through them for the knowledge he wanted.
He sighed and dropped his hand.
"I can't read anything that would indicate she is anything other then human." He said in frustration.
"But she is a Child of the Moon. We came upon her at moon set, she was already changing back and it was too late for her to return, she was bunking down for the day in a makeshift nest in the forest." Saskia said, quickly explaining why they didn't just let her go back to her den and follow her.
"I can not help you." Aro said. "I can't see all her thoughts."
I bit my lip and thought about whether this was betraying my fellow wolves, but even though they were harmless weak things as humans, as wolves they were crazed indiscriminate killers who did nothing to cover up their atrocities.
This girl might be quivering right now, but she had most likely killed and killed often.
"But you have seen all her thoughts Master." I said.
"I have not seen her wolf thoughts."
"But the wolf is not her." I said trying to word out my theory. "Ok I sometimes joke that I'm three people, Miss Wolf, Miss Vampire and plain old Essie, but really it's just a way for me to differentiate between my states. What if, what if in the Children of the Moon there really are two beings. The human it once was and the wolf that has taken over. The wolf must somehow draw power from the moon or something and that's why it comes to the fore when the moon is out. In the day it retreats to the safety of some little bubble in the human's head and it leaves them confused as to how they got into the middle of nowhere all naked like."
"Interesting theory." Aro said.
"Only I think I might be able to locate and access her wolf mind." I said. "I'm not promising anything, but I can find things hidden deep in a persons mind. Even if that person has forgotten it themselves. I once saw into the dream of a murderer and saw through all his rationalising that his wife deserved it. I saw the truth through the lie of his memory."
"I suppose there is no harm done if you fail and if you succeed then all the better." Aro said with a smile.
I nodded my head and moved to kneel in front of the girl I smiled at her.
"Do you speak English?" I asked.
"A little." She answered.
"Ok, well I'm not going to hurt you." I said. "I just need you to look at me and keep looking in my eyes."
The girl shook her head and muttered something in Swedish.
"You need to speak a little slower." Tobias informed me.
"Ok. Look in my eyes. I won't hurt you." I promised.
The girl looked into my eyes and I placed my hands either side of her face, careful not to aggravate her damaged right side. I made the connection even though there was only her good eye to look into.
Hi, can you hear me? I asked.
What? The girl asked.
Don't be frightened. I'm Essie and I can look into your mind. These people think you are guilty of bad crimes. I explained.
What crimes? The girl gasped and her mind flashed with nothing more sinister than lifting a lipstick from a beauty store when she was thirteen.
They think you're a werewolf. Well they know you're a werewolf but they think you're worse than the normal ones. I explained, and I cursed myself for lying at the end.
Werewolf? The girl asked and laughed aloud.
Yes a werewolf. I stated.
But they are stories to frighten children. She scoffed.
Are you sure? What do you think these people are? I asked.
Confusion flavoured her mind.
They are vampires, Carita. I informed her.
How do you know my name? Carita asked in astonishment.
I'm talking into your mind; I think my knowing your name is least freakish thing about this. Wouldn't you agree? I asked a little more sarky than necessary.
But vampires? Carita demanded, and her mind swam with images of movie vamps old and new.
I ignored her preconceptions and ploughed on with the facts.
You've seen their red eyes, felt their cold stone skin. They are vampires and you are a werewolf.
And what are you? She asked.
I am…something else. Never mind what I am, what's important now is whether or not you're a run of the mill Child of the Moon or if you're part of a pack. I said, feeling a little exasperated.
But I don't remember being a werewolf.
But there are many things you don't remember. Your nights are lost to you now and when was the last time you saw the moon? I pointed out.
I felt the blanks in her memory grow darker as she tried to pursue them.
Don't force them. I said. Let me look and try to unlock them for you.
How? She demanded.
Just relax and let me in.
How do I do that?
Don't resist, allow me to look where I want to look and try not to panic. I said, keeping my mind voice low and soothing.
I felt her mind relax and I moved in, unhampered by her which made it easier for me to see everything I needed to see. There was a dark patch at the back of her mind, a thorny snarl of a thought with a centre of darkness. I moved toward it and I sensed something cowering within.
"How much longer is this going to take?" A voice demanded from outside.
I held onto the edges of the den of a thought, before answering, "As long as it takes and it'll be even longer if I lose concentration and have to begin again. So please be quiet until I'm finished." I said aloud, then I returned to looking into Carita's mind.
So I returned to that snarled up thought that was so much like a den and there was something cowering within.
Here doggy, doggy… I whispered.
It whimpered.
I pondered for a moment and allowed a bit of my wolf essence through. The creature in the hole sniffed and surged forward leaping out of the den at me.
It was a shadow of a wolf, ragged and almost humanoid in its deformity.
A flutter of images…a snarling wolf in the night…bone crushing pain of metamorphosis…The moon in control above the silver light calling to the bloodlust driving me to despair…to seek nourishment…
I was forced from the mind, literally thrown out and my body actually flew back some as my mind whip-lashed into my head.
I sat up and shook my head, trying to get rid of the ringing in my ears and the sudden urge I had to go tear up the nearest village. I felt an odd sense of displacement as the wolf looked out at a coloured world before she settled back down.
Carita swam into focus as she let out a scream, clutching at her head.
She let out cries in Swedish that I couldn't even begin to understand. Although I could hazard a guess as she roared and whined and writhed. I looked on in shock wondering what the hell was happening.
I felt an arm around me and knew it was Tobias.
"What did you do?" He asked in a quick whisper.
"Nothing. I just found the wolf and called it out." I said in the flat voice of shock.
"Oh." Tobias said, and there was a lot of weight behind that 'oh'.
"Why? What is she saying?" I demanded.
"There's a lot of swearing but it amounts to 'my head…it's splitting in two…what have you done to me?' That's more or less the gist of it."
"Oh god! What have I done?" I gasped.
Carita gave me a baleful look with her one good eye before her head dropped and she went still.
"Did you get the required information?" Aro asked.
"I…I don't know." I replied. "I need a moment to sort out my mind."
"Very well." Aro said.
I tried to catch my breath all the while attempting to sort through the images of the wolf's feral brain. There was nothing truly coherent, just senses and instincts that had to be pieced together.
There was a growl and the Carita surged up off the floor, only it wasn't Carita now, it was the wolf and it looked around, angry and frightened. A cornered animal with no choice of flight so it was determined to fight. It crouched and leapt at Aro but I was up and in the way, grabbing around the bony arms in the hope of holding it back, but the wolf knew how to use the hidden strength in Carita's slight body and I lost my grip on her. She managed to get one arm around me but Aro caught her hand and the Wolf Squad moved in to apprehend her.
"Wait." Aro said and the Wolf Hunters held her.
I could almost feel it, the flow of mind from the wolf to the vampire and me caught in the middle. I made sure my shield was intact just in case.
"I have all I need." Aro said, dropping the hand and the Wolf Hunters secured it. I moved from in-between the vampire and the werewolf and moved back to my spot behind the throne feeling that I probably should now I'd served my purpose.
"Deal with it." Aro said as he moved to sit in his throne.
It took me a moment to realize what he meant. By the time I worked it out they were tearing Carita apart, only it wasn't the metallic screeching of a vampire, but the wet, sinewy sound of blood, bone and muscle. I suddenly felt myself transported back to the battle and Timmy was being killed again.
I felt the tears fall but then I felt something else entirely as the scent of her blood hit my nose. I felt hunger. I fought against it, but I wanted that blood that was trickling so wastefully down the grate in the floor. I held myself in place and balled my hands into fists as I tried to hold back Miss Vampire. I pulled up some heat in order to be the me in the middle, but even she liked the blood.
I had to be strong, I couldn't show weakness. Maybe it would help if I held my breath. I held my breath but as I started to feel faint I realised it was no good. I wasn't like the vampires; I needed to breath to live not just to smell.
I took a deep breath and opened my eyes.
"Essie?" Tobias' voice seemed to tune in from afar as black spots danced around his face.
I blinked and tried to get my breathing back to normal
"I'm ok. Just need some fresh air." I said. "May I be excused?" I directed at Aro.
"Yes you may Essie, but I'm afraid I will require Tobias to stay." Aro declared.
"Why?" I asked, too unnerved to remember who I was talking to at present.
"Because we need his strategic wisdom to help with the raid of the wolf den. You may go wait for him outside." Aro said.
"I'm not going without Tobias." I said, feeling a sudden dread of the thought of what might happen to me out there while Tobias was detained in here.
"You can't stay here, I need Tobias fully focused on the task ahead. Something I'm sure I will not have if his delightful fiancé is present."
"Then you don't know the ins and outs of imprinting." I said. "Tobias will find it hard to concentrate if he's worried about my safety."
"Then I'll assign you a protector until we are finished with Tobias." Aro said pleasantly.
"Who?" Tobias and I asked at the same time.
"Jane." Aro said simply.
I was about to reply, are you fricking insane? But Tobias beat me to it and replied, "A wise choice Master."
"What?"
"Jane is the best person to trust to guard your life." Tobias said. If Aro tells her to guard you with her life then she will do so. To her Aro's word is law. She will not even be rude to you if Aro orders it.
"Ok." I said.
"Jane dear." Aro said pleasantly.
"Yes Master?" Jane replied.
"Please keep Essie company and should anyone act in a manner you think offends Essie in any way you have my permission to burn them." Aro said benevolently.
"Yes Master." Jane said as her red eyes suddenly lit up with life. "Shall we." She directed at me with a sweep of her arm.
"Sure." I said, knowing I had no choice in this at all and that was really worrying. "I'll see you later." I said and kissed Tobias on the cheek and as I did so I threw my shield around his mind and attempted to wrap up any information that we didn't want the Volturi to know, just like I did with my pack. If Aro was trying to get something out of Tobias then hopefully he wouldn't.
Jane gave a dramatic sigh and I followed her out into the corridor. She marched along it and I kept pace although I'm sure she thought I couldn't.
"Are you sorry your missing the meeting?" I asked.
"Please? I find such occasions so utterly boring. A waste of time. I know of one strategy that always works. Burn, burn, burn…" She finished with a fiendish smile.
"Unless you come up against Grandma Bella." I pointed out.
Jane hissed and rounded on me.
"Don't mention the name of that harlot in my presence." She growled.
"Ok." I said, resisting the urge to add 'touchie' because I didn't want to wind her up too much. "But seriously Jane, you don't have to win every battle."
"You do when you are Volturi. If you are defeated then they no longer fear you or worse you are dead. Winning is everything."
"I guess in a life or death battle that's true." I conceded. "Provided you know you're in one."
"I do not understand." Jane said.
"Do you want to see my scar?" I asked, suddenly excited that I had someone new to tell the real story of how I got it regardless of the fact that it was Jane of the Volturi.
"If you insist." Jane said in a bored voice.
"Come on." I said, grabbing her hand. "Take me to that place where you first showed Masen his rainbow skin."
"What is rainbow skin?" She asked looking at me as if I was slightly mad.
"You know, cause you all sparkle in sunlight and it throws rainbows." I explained.
"Oh. It's this way." She said, pulling me in a different direction.
We ended up in the little round alcove that I had seen in Masen's mind once. He had filled it with light but it merely made my skin glow when I stepped into the strong sunbeams since I was in my human skin.
"Look." I said, and pulled the left strap of my dress off my shoulder to show her.
Jane made sit down motions with her hand and I realised I was a bit too tall for her to see properly. I sat down on one of the benches and Jane stepped into the light and now rainbows danced on the light coloured stone as she moved in for a closer look.
"Oh." She said and poked at the scar tissue. "Did something try to take a bite out of you?" She asked.
"Yeah. A dumbass boy who had a crush on me but thought I was better off dead than to be in love with a vampire." I said with a shrug as I pulled the strap back up. "It's no big deal. I could have taken him like that," I said and snapped my fingers, "If I'd been aware from the get go that it was a fight to the death. Also I didn't want to kill him and I had no idea how to put him down without actually putting him down."
Jane laughed.
"That was a dog joke if I am not mistaken." She said.
"Yep. But only I'm allowed to make them cause I am a damn mutt. You can't." I said firmly.
"So does that mean you are not permitted to make jokes at the expense of vampires?" Jane asked.
"I'm also vampire so yeah I can." I pointed out.
"Ah-ha! But you are not Volturi." She observed.
"No." I conceded.
"Therefore you may not make jokes at our expense." She stated.
"Ok I won't. Not that I intended to anyway." I said. "Way too much of a risk."
"Good. So how did you escape?"
"I didn't. Not really. He had the jump on me and I was holding back until it was too late. I was nearly dead, but then Tobias saved me." I said with a wistful sigh. "And Jake and the rest of the pack too." I added quickly.
"They were in time."
"Yep. So I'm here to tell the tale." I said lightly.
"What happened to the stupid mutt afterwards?" Jane asked.
"He was exiled."
"After he tried to kill a pack member? Should he not have been executed?" Jane asked as if it was an appalling oversight on our part.
"We do not kill our pack brothers regardless of their crime." I said firmly.
"No. Instead you exile them, thus making them someone else's problem." Jane said.
I shrugged.
"Let's just agree to disagree on that one." I said. "You have your politics we have ours."
"I suppose I could view it as such." Jane said with a shrug.
"So. Have you had any near death experiences?" I asked.
"Not since I became a vampire." Jane said smugly and sat on the bench next to me.
"So you had a scrape with death when you were still human." I asked, feeling privileged that she was sharing but wondering how long this window would remain open or what she would consider a question too far.
"When I was born every day was a scrape with death. But I think the biggest incident I would consider most life threatening was when they…" Jane began.
"Well looky here, Lady Jane palling it with the mutt." Darius said snidely.
Jane and I looked up at him from our seats. I groaned while Jane narrowed her eyes.
"Hello Katy dear." He crooned.
"What do you want now?" I demanded, feeling angered by his intrusion.
"I want to talk more about our little date." He said, sitting down on the stone bench opposite.
"We weren't even on a date." I said with a snort.
Darius shook his head.
"You were supposed to be the main course and your treacherous friend the dessert." Darius said joyfully.
"Marlin is not a traitor!" I growled.
"I think that depends on your point of view. What say you Lady Jane?"
"Marlin is not a traitor." Jane said primly.
"What would you know?" Darius snorted.
"A damn site more than you my boy." Jane replied and there were warning tones in her voice.
"How come your not in the strategy meeting anyway?" I demanded.
"I'm a doer not a thinker." Darius said, stretching his legs out on the bench and leaning back against a pillar. "Saskia's the brains. She gets the two four then tells us what to do. That's how we roll, wolf."
"What made you come back? Did you run out of vampires to screw over?" I demanded.
"Nah. Me trick didn't work so good when I was working it alone." He said with a lazy shrug.
"What happened to that guy you were with. He seemed ok with what you were doing, loved it in fact if I remember correctly." I said, my voice low and acidic.
"Well he changed his mind on helping me out on account of being thrown through a brick wall." Darius said in sorry tones.
"I warned him to keep his hands to himself." I said a little smugly.
"Yeah well he packed the gig in and I didn't want to work with a human so I came back here. Thought I may as well since I had me some dirt on Tobias. Little Jane here even went to the New World to check it out. Didn't find much to report as I recall. Wonder why that was?" Darius yammered on.
I was gonna respond but then he let out a yell and fell to the floor. I glanced at Jane who was glaring at Darius with cold fury.
"Respect your elders." Jane said and blinked once.
Darius got back to his feet and sat on the bench. He gave Jane a wary look but then his eyes fell on me once more and he grinned.
"So after you got rid of me mate I couldn't play the date game no more and do you know how hard it is to find an incubus what's willing to work with a vampire?"
"Oh puh-lease!" Jane said with a snort. "Are you still continuing with those fairy stories?"
"They're not fairy stories. They're real. They feed off energies that we can't see. So he had the energies and I had the blood and the vampette to play with after since he couldn't get nothing from her. Well if she was stupid enough to go veggie then she deserves to die." And with every word out of his mouth I hated him that little bit more.
I clamped back on my growl and forced myself to remain in my chair as I had visions of tearing him limb from limb.
"Why Katy dear you're trembling." Darius crooned. "Just like the night we met." He added as he sidled across the floor space between us.
He reached his hand out toward we and I had a flash of his tongue rasping against my neck.
"Don't touch me." I growled and punched out blindly.
Luckily I connected with his nose and actually sent him staggering backwards. I shot to my feet before he could.
"Just stay away from me." I stated and turned to walk away.
"Oh no you don't." Jane said, and at first I thought she was talking to me, but when I turned back she was using her power to keep Darius in his place.
Jane lifted her chin and folded her hands neatly in the sleeves of her robe.
"That's what happens when you mess with my ward." She said flatly. "Now I suggest you go scuttle off somewhere that is away from us."
She turned and walked past me. I was a little shocked as I began to follow her.
"Did you just zap him for me?" I asked.
"He offended you and Master Aro told me to burn anyone who did so." Jane said flatly.
"Oh. Well thanks anyway." I said, and I really was thankful for her gift for once.
"You're welcome." Jane said eloquently. "On a more personal note, I suggest you challenge the snake to a duel in the arena and put him on his ass."
"What?"
"We are girls of the Volturi and we must keep our reputation for being tough. It would not do for you to let the side down. Besides Aro does not abide fighting in the hallways, so a display of strength in the arena will put him in his place. And if you happen to irreparably damage him in the process I doubt many would mourn his passing."
"I… You want me to kill him?" I gasped.
"If you had to choose between your life and his would you kill him then?" Jane asked, regarding me with a thoughtful look.
"Well yeah." I answered without hesitation.
"Then do it sooner rather than later. In the end it will be a fight to the death between you so you might as well get it over with."
"Is that your solution to everyone who's a problem? Kill them?" I demanded.
"It's worked for me so far." Jane observed.
"Well it may work for you, but I can't just kill for the sake of killing. The person has to be an actual threat to the life of me and mine, not just an annoyance."
"Shame." Jane said sadly. "Well if you change your mind merely call on me and I will instruct you in the etiquette of the arena."
"I will." I promised.
Jane nodded her head and we walked on along the corridor.
"So what do you do for fun around here?" I asked, feeling a little bored now.
"Burn those who deserve it."
"Well I know that's what you do, but what do you do when there's no one to burn?" I replied.
"Wait with anticipation until there is someone to burn." Jane said flatly, her bored voice having returned.
"There must be some other pleasure you get out of life other than torturing people." I said in exasperation.
"Nothing I can think of." Jane said in absolute tones.
"Do you…collect anything?" I said, striving for an old fashioned hobby.
"Such as?"
"I don't know…dolls?" I suggested.
"Do I look like I'm seven?" Jane demanded.
I shook my head.
"I have collected many things over the years in the hope of gleaning some pleasure from them. But collections are tiresomely finite and I end up throwing them away because they are creating a clutter."
"I suppose…" I conceded while I thought. "Ooh, I know. You could collect blood samples of each of your victims, see how many people you eat in a year, see what your best year was out of a decade."
"Have I suddenly changed my name to Dexter?" She asked. "Besides having the scent of blood around constantly would be maddening. And what happens if I turn vegetarian?"
"How likely is that to happen?" I asked.
"It is a minimal possibility."
"Anyway, you could collect samples of the animal blood to compare with your past records. Hold on, Dexter? As in that old cop show? The one where he's a cop and a serial killer?" I asked, shocked that Jane even knew about TV.
"A blood splatter analyst to be exact, yes I refer to that show. I enjoyed it ever so much and despite the fact us vampires have total recall I bought all the box-sets in order to view as many times as I desire."
"Really? Well I like that show, but I've never been able to catch it in the right order and I don't think I've watched all of them."
"Would you care to watch them?" Jane asked.
"If you don't mind." I said, feeling weird excepting an invitation from Jane of Volterra.
"No. Although we should devote a viewing time to each season so you will have to find time away from Tobias. Unless you wish to bring him along. Although if you do can you ensure he brings a handsome friend with him?" Jane replied.
"I'll see what I can do." I chuckled.
"I was being serious." Jane stated flatly.
"Then I'll see what I can do." I promised.
We walked on for a while in silence as I wondered where all this was leading with Jane. Or if she was just doing this to occupy me while the meeting took place.
"You are a surprising one wolf girl. Why do I not scare you?" Jane asked and I was so lost in my thoughts that it took me a moment to realise she'd spoken to me.
I shrugged.
"I got my shield so you're not burning me." I said simply.
"But there is more than one way to burn a person." Jane pointed out.
"Yeah, but you can't hurt me at the moment since I'm under your protection." I pointed out.
"There is that I suppose." Jane said lowly. "I think they are most likely finished now. I should return you to your chamber."
"That's fine by me." I said.
"Come." Jane said in her regular tone.
I followed her even though we were heading to my room.
Thankfully Tobias was coming the other way when we reached the door of our chamber.
"Here you are." He said taking hold of my hand and kissed it.
"Here I am." I said jovially and kissed his cheek.
"How was your afternoon?" He asked.
"It was good. Huh Jane?" I asked, turning to her, but she was gone. "Where did she go?" I asked.
"She is no longer required to guard you and so has gone to do her own thing." Tobias said.
I shrugged and we entered the chamber.
What was your afternoon really like? Tobias asked as he shut the door.
I told you it was good. Apart from Darius turning up, but other than that it was good. Weird but good. I said as I went to sit on the plush love seat in the reading section of the room.
"Darius?" Tobias said, his voice low and icy as he sat beside me.
"He started haranguing me but I punched him when he tried to touch me and then Jane zapped him." I explained.
"Jane zapped Darius for touching you?" Tobias asked in astonishment.
"Yep. She said it was cause Aro told her to burn anyone who offended me."
"I told you she would follow Aro's orders." Tobias said with a nod.
"Yep. But we also talked." I informed him.
"Talked?" Tobias asked, sounding a little worried.
"Yeah. I thought she was gonna be all moody at me for being forced to baby sit, but she spoke with me."
"What did you speak about?"
"Oh this and that. How Timmy tried to kill me and you saved me, and then how it's hard to find a hobby that'll last you forever, unless you happen to have a passion for torture. Did you know she likes Dexter?" I guess I was rambling a bit, but it had been a while since Tobias and I had something new to discuss that wasn't our current predicament.
"I know of no Dexter among the Volturi." Tobias said with a frown.
"No. The TV Dexter." I replied with a giggle. "You know, the serial killer."
"Of course she would like him." Tobias said with a chuckle.
"Yeah." I sighed and smiled. "You know, she seemed different from what I was expecting."
Tobias looked uncertain. I think it would be wise if you did not let your guard down with Lady Jane quite yet. She has no friends for a very good reason.
Ok. I'll keep my guard up, but I don't have to shut her out completely. I said a little irritably because I always got annoyed when I thought he was trying to dictate my life, even if he was offering good advice.
I don't suggest you do, I merely suggesting caution.
"And I will." I said with a reassuring smile.
"Very well, but I worry."
"I know. And you don't think I was worried for you?" I pointed out.
"Why?" He asked with a frown.
"You were stuck in the audience chamber alone with a lot of the Volturi. I was worried."
"There was no need to be." Tobias said.
I gave him a dubious look but decided there was no use arguing.
"So what did you discuss?" I asked.
"How best to beat a pack of werewolves." Tobias answered.
"I know that. But what did you come up with?"
"It was ridiculously simple, Saskia has used the same tactics many times. I know not why they needed to consult me?" Tobias said a little aggrieved.
"Other then to separate us?" I asked.
We must be careful in these instances since we are unable to refuse Aro's orders. Tobias said, not denying my suspicion.
I know, you could almost taste the threat behind his words this afternoon. I said, feeling a little shiver down my spine as I remembered just how simple Aro'd made my choice without needing to actually saying, obey me or you'll be punished.
He's testing us and we must be careful.
Yeah. But let's not talk about him now. They take up a lot of our day as it is so let's make up a rule. I said as I moved closer to him.
A rule?
No Volturi in our chamber. I said and grinned.
That sounds good to me. Tobias replied and he kissed me.
I giggled and kissed him back and it turned to making out, and it was nice and clean with no urge to mate. I was glad the push had subsided for the time being, I didn't want to leave myself feeling so vulnerable as I had last night in the shower. Not here in Volterra.
After I ate the supper I was provided with I went to change into my bathrobe and Tobias and I headed out for our evening run.
I was looking forward to my run after such a long day. Funny how I looked forward to that stone oval when I would have felt penned in by it a month ago. But then again it was the freest I could be now. The freedom that came with the wolf was something to cherish.
We ran the last mile of tunnel and I could feel the thrill in my veins as Miss Wolf waited in anticipation for her chance to be free. But I slowed as we neared the fresh air of the tunnel entrance and Tobias slowed with me.
There were too many vamp scents here, well new vamp scents, for my liking.
I looked at Tobias in question and he looked a little worried. He took my hand firmly in his as we continued on out under the stars. There were torches burning in hoops all around the walls sending red light dancing all along the area. Figures danced in the midst of the light and cast shadows in all directions.
It took a moment for me to recognise the Wolf Hunters all engaged in mock combat.
Saskia sauntered up to us dressed in a combination of leotard and leggings you'd more likely see on an aerobics instructor than the leader of a hit werewolf hunting team.
"Oh I'm sorry." She said. "Did you have the practice area booked?"
I shook my head.
"Ah well, my troops need to brush up on their skills before we head out to take on the mutts. No offence." She tacked the last bit on in a way that made me seethe.
"None taken." I said through my teeth.
"You're more than welcome to join us."
I snorted, "I don't think that will be such a good idea."
"They will not kill you, you have my word." Saskia promised.
"Yeah? Well I might just kill them." I said before I could stop myself since I had just spotted Darius making lewd gestures at me from the safety of the group.
"What?" Saskia exclaimed.
Essie… Tobias warned unnecessarily.
"I meant, I might not be able to help it when I'm wolf. I'm all instincts then and the Quileute instinct when a vamp is coming at you is, they're trying to kill me, get them first." I explained.
"Oh. Well maybe you can practice later." Saskia said kindly.
"Yeah. Maybe." I said just as nice. "See ya."
"Toodles." Saskia said with a wide smile.
"Good bye Saskia." Tobias said coldly and we turned from the Hunters and headed back to our chamber.
I felt…it was…I was bursting inside. Disappointment, anger, frustration. I felt like tearing down the walls, throwing an epic scale tantrum. I wanted to…I wanted to go and tear every last one of them apart. I wanted to… I wanted to cry.
Tobias and I entered the chamber and I slammed the door before I leant my back against it and slid down it until I was on the floor with my knees pulled up to my chest. I dropped my head into my hands and began to cry.
It wasn't any sissy crying either; it was proper chest wrenching sobs that had tears streaming between my fingers in no time at all. I was a wreck, and it was over something so stupid. That made me angry, and then more upset that I was letting them anger me.
"Essie?" Tobias said softly and placed his arm around me.
Why? Why? Running is my only freedom and they've taken it away? I hate them. Damn them all! Why? I raged loudly in my mind.
It is most likely only for tonight. Tobias replied as he sent his fingers searching beneath my hair so he could stroke my cheek.
I know. I said as I moved so that I could rest my head on his shoulder. But a little warning would have been nice.
It would have been the courteous thing to do. Tobias said. But the Wolf Hunters are rarely known for their manners. Thanks to Caius mortal dread of werewolves they've managed to elevate their status and seem to think they are above the guard.
"Are they?"
"No. They like to think they are, but in the hierarchy they rank lower. Hence the grey coats." Tobias explained.
"Great. So they've just got ideas above their station." I said sourly, sniffing as my tears started to ebb.
"So it would seem. Fear not for we can run later." He said in a perky voice, which meant he was trying to cheer me up even though he wasn't happy, himself.
"Nah. I'll be too tired by then. Let's just go to sleep. Is that ok?" I asked.
"Sounds good to me."
I smiled as best I could and kissed him before I got to my feet. I pulled him up also and we made our way over to the bed.
Do you not want to change first? He asked.
I shook my head. I just want to sleep. I informed him as I turned down the cover.
"Very well." Tobias said, although he looked slightly worried.
I'm not giving in. I promised him. I'm just playing it smart. They want me to go demand at Aro or go for a later run, but I'm not gonna do that. I declared as I got into the bed and Tobias climbed in on the other side.
"Light." I reminded him.
He gave me a look of mocking annoyance but there were traces of relief that I was being a little more Essie in that statement.
He got up off the bed and ghosted round the room, switching off all the lights. There was a little light that filtered in from a high small window and it offered enough light for me to make out his shape as he climbed back into bed.
His arm went around me and I moved to lie my head on his chest.
Night Tobias. I said.
Good night Essie. He replied.
I smiled as I settled against his chest, drawing comfort from his cool and his scent as I drifted into sleep…
Treacle, that's the only way I could describe it. Thick dark treacle that clung to me, only it wasn't sweet and it smelt awful. So not treacle then, tar maybe. You know one of those prehistoric tar pits that became the grave of countless unknowing animals. I was up to my waist in the oozing gunk and it was pulling me down.
I tried to move toward the side, but there was no side and anyway I couldn't move out of it, I was stuck. Stuck and sinking and there was nothing I could do about it as the sticky black climbed past my breasts, my neck, it was up to my chin now.
I panicked, struggling but it was no good. I sank beneath the surface and I felt the pressure weigh in on me. It went in my mouth, up my nose, down into my lungs and I suffocated. As I fell away from life it was no longer tar, just water.
I kicked to the surface and burst through gasping. There was a canoe nearby and I climbed into it, lying in a spreading puddle as I tried to get my breath back. I sat up slowly and peered down into the murky water, I was sure something moved down there.
There was a surge in the water and the canoe rocked. I fell onto the floor of the canoe and held on, waiting for it to subside. It didn't, it continued to rock until something leapt out of the water and hovered.
Blond hair danced on the wind and blue eyes looked accusing as she pointed her finger at me. Carita was glaring hellfire at me, but she couldn't seem to hold herself together as her image jumped between the pointing Carita and the ragged wolf ready to pounce.
I readied myself, reaching for the Quileute fire if I needed it as I watched her carefully waiting for the attack.
She rushed at me so fast I couldn't respond…
I screamed and awoke on my feet, crouched and ready to pounce.
"What's wrong?" Tobias asked, landing in front of me.
I jumped a mile and it took me a moment to catch my breath as my heart pounded in my chest.
"I killed her and she knows it." I whispered.
"Who?" Tobias asked his gold eyes wide with worry.
"Carita. She knows what I did. I let the wolf free and they saw what she was and killed her." I said, my voice faint and raw.
"No. No. She was dead regardless. She had been cursed and was a Child of the Moon. The Volturi hold no tolerance for them." Tobias explained while trying to soothe me at the same time.
"But I sold out the others." I countered.
"They would have tracked them down eventually. Better this way, it means less innocent lives lost to the Moon. You are not to blame for this." Tobias said gently.
I wanted to drink her blood. I admitted shamefully.
Yes, but you crave the blood of the Quileutes more than you ever have normal humans. There is most likely a similarity in your scents that spoke to Miss Vampire. Especially since you were in a heightened state of emotion and you were wearing your vampire skin at the time. Tobias rationalised.
I shook my head, unworthy of his words of comfort.
"Essie, what happened today would have occurred whether you were here or not." Tobias said a little firmly.
"What? Like her going all psycho cause her wolf got let loose?" I demanded.
"Very well!" Tobias said in exasperation. "What you did today was awful and you're bad person for doing so. How could you drive the poor girl insane like that? Never mind the fact that she was half crazy to begin with, since the wolf was always there looking over her shoulder, awaiting the rise of the moon. You are a selfish and hideous person for craving that which your body wants naturally. I have no idea how you will ever forgive yourself." Tobias said in one long ice-cold rant.
I blinked and looked at him in shocked anger.
"Excuse me?" I demanded.
"My words of comfort were not working so I thought a little shock treatment would work." Tobias said firmly, but then he sighed before he said in softer tones, "I do not think those things of you Essie and neither should you. You are in a highly stressful situation and you cannot make it worse by sending yourself on a guilt trip." And he stroked my hair behind my ear before resting his hand against my cheek.
"But I…" I protested.
"No. You didn't." Tobias cut me off, his tone sharp once more. "Now stop. You must lock it away. It is the only thing you can do. If you entertain your guilt it will eat you alive here in the walls of Volterra."
I nodded my head and he hugged me.
"Now come." He said, "You were only asleep an hour, you must have your rest."
I nodded my head as he helped me to my feet.
We got back into the bed and it took me a lot longer to settle down this time. And when I finally settled my mind for sleep I didn't find my rest. Every time I dropped off to sleep I'd wake with a start. I didn't get much sleep that night, but then again, I didn't deserve it.
Ok, so that's a bit of a depressing note to end on. But Essie is in Volterra and it can't be all sunshine, lollypops and rainbows… gah, got that song stuck in my head now lol. Anyways, Essie is gonna have some dark times, but there will be enough light to make up for it.
Thank you for reading
Please review
Gemma x