Chapter IV.

No Corsets for me, Thanks

Almost immedittely, the pair ran into problems. "No, I won't wear it. It makes me look like a pilgrim" Tania crossed her arms, and rejected a peach dress with a "Peter Pan" collar within a millisecond of seeing it. "Besides, the color won't work for me. Do you have anything in a blue? A dark green even? Or what about-"

"Tania Semler, don't you even say the word black. I will not have you parading around Paris looking like you just came back from a funeral."

Is he part woman? That's something my mom would say! "All you wear is black, wear some color, blah blah blah"

Tania opened her mouth to say something, closed it, then opened it again. "Why? You look the exact same way, and how do you know my last name?"

"I do it because I'm a miserable old corpse and black works for me. Second, I did some research on you before we left. I went through that bag and found some plastic paper with everything about you on it" Erik told her proudly, thinking she would praise him on his snooping skills.

"Yes that would be what we like to call a driver's license and you're in big trouble buddy".

Wrapping both arms around her trying to be mushy for a lesser sentence he whispered "Why?"

"Don't you come cuddling up to me Erik, and because, you now know how much I weigh and here's a lesson on girls for you Erik, many many many do not like that fact. Now, you must pay In fact, women where I come from start wars over this… There are many deaths. "

Erik was silent, he knew she could easily get her revenge with modern tools he didn't understand, and therefore be completely at her mercy and powerless to stop her. Women are more dangerous in her time; I think I should be thankful that I'm living today.

"Excuse me dears, I'm afraid it's time for the young lady to be laced up in the corset" the salesgirl announced breaking up the duo's little love fest.

"Hold up, the young lady's going to do what? What's going to happen to her?" Tania perked up, her heart suddenly racing.

Erik nudged her- "Hold my hand"

"What? Why?"

"You heard me, just do it. You have no idea what you're in for. I almost feel sorry for you. Now don't argue with me, you're lucky I'm even letting you."

"Oh yes, I'm special. Erik Erik! Can I shine your shoes, can I breathe your air, and will you love me forever?" she mocked acting like the crazed fans she saw at rock concerts who profess their undying love for the star they see on the stage or music videos.

"For your sake, I will let that one go. Now just grab my hand before I change my mind and let you do this alone." Reluctantly, she grabbed at his hand, ignoring the fact he tensed just a bit at the contact. "I feel like I'm part of some show with the two of you crowded around me. Why not charge admission for this? Maybe enough people will show up we'll never have to work a day in our natural born lives ever again." Tania grumbled to either one of them, whoever was listening. She didn't like not knowing what was coming, while these two obviously knew, and refused to tell her.

"Ok on the count of three we'll start. I always like to give my ladies a countdown since this is the least pleasant part. Are you ready?"

No, not really. I hate pain. Hate it hate it hate it, I'm such a wuss. I can't do pain

"Yes, let's get it over and done with"

"1…2.." the salesgirl yanked down on the strings as hard as she could and Tania nearly doubled over. It didn't hurt as bad as she thought it would, but the lack of air was definitely there. She took Erik's advice and held onto his hand for dear life.

"Oh God not again" as another yank came down on her.

"Alright God, you win you win. That one time I was the one who ate the whole bag of chips before Uncle John came over"

YANK

"That time I got the ticket and told my mom the cop was wrong, he was righttt, I lieddd I ran the light!"

YANK

"I was the one who told Trevor he was left on the doorstep by gypsies. Me me me meee, not the guy next doorr" Tania whined hoping God would forgive her and stop the dreaded punishment. She grabbed tighter onto Erik's hand and was angry to see he looked quite amused by her confessions while she was hoping he'd make the pain stop right that second. Going in for the kill, the saleslady gave one final yank and Erik's' hand got crushed even more. He put her hand onto a chair and told her to hold onto that for awhile, he needed a break.

"Erikk..You beeeter hope you don't have..kids" she choked out fighting to breathe.

"Why? Because of my face? Let me tell you something, I don't need you bringing up every painful thing in the book. I already know that full well thank you very much, it's been done, it's old and I'm tired of it. Now come on, we're going now" he practically snarled at her, paying the cashier and stormed out of the store.

Tania stood in shock for a minute. She hadn't meant it that way. She didn't even mention his face…did she? She followed after him, and had to run, if not jog fast to keep up with him. "Have you any idea how quickly you can overreact?" she asked throwing her arms around him, just like he had done to her a few minutes before. He was silent and kept going. "Ahhaa you're quiet, that means you know I'm riiight" she said in a sing-song voice. "Anyway, I meant you should never have kids because if you can't take little old me grabbing your hand, think of your poor wife who will be in 1000 times more pain. She may get insulted if you tell her to grab onto a chair instead of her own husband, I sure would. Now can we stop walking please? That speech used up a good portion of my air and I'm ready to just take up shop on my knees this second."

Erik's only response was to stop and look at her, she stared back, her hands working the damn corset trying to get some air into her deprived lungs, and thinking he had no right to be mad. She explained herself, and rather well too! Then, before anyone had any time, or even any desire for control, he dragged her back into a corner and kissed her, his hands doing the corset-work for her. When they finally separated, Erik came down from his high but still couldn't hide his happiness and Tania's eyes shone like rubies under a bright light.

"Did we-"

"Oh yes Erik, you just decided to kiss me in a dark corner hidden from the world."

"Ummm, that was for…Well, because I felt bad you had to get strapped into that thing, you know. I mean for the first time…ever"

"How did your hands know what to do?"

"I know a thing or two about ladies underwear, all my years of seeing girls undress" he commented as Tania's hand made open contact with his head. He turned to face her, she'd smacked him, yes but she was laughing.

"You were joking right?" she gasped in between breaths "You'll be in soooo much trouble when I tell the girls." Erik grabbed her arm and pulled her back in again "yes mon ange, I was only joking. I have never seen a women undress"

Good, because I have no idea who these girls even are that I would tell.

"Well thank God for that, because women start wars over that too. In fact, we're known to create quite an uproar! What to know what I'm thinking?"

"Do I have a choice? I mean after that lovely explanation"

"No. Now I'm thinking this deserves some payback. When you come home with me, just wait until I get you in a speedo! We'll see how much you like it" she laughed pulling out of his grip and running towards the Opera Populaire leaving him to follow in the rear. He didn't know what in heaven's name a "Speedo" was, but based on the word "Payback", he could only assume it wasn't good.

Vindictive little She-Devil. From the very first moment Erik knew he would not be bored, but Speedos and revenge was more than he was willing to accept.