Chapter 3

Lacey runs a few more errands before she came home. She feels better after seeing Archie and going for a massage afterwards at a spa. She realized that her sadness had not quite gone away. It may take a while for that to happen.

She lets herself in the house. It was empty because her mother has taken Clara to gymnastic practice at school. So, Lacey has some time to herself before they got home. She has a slight headache earlier which had not gone way even with the massage. She takes some pain meds and walks up the stairs to her bedroom.

She is not prepared to see Danny Desai sitting on the end of her bed awaiting her return.

"Hi, Lace." Danny begins with a slight smile.

Lacey is determined to harden her heart. "What do you want Danny? I thought we had said everything a few days ago."

"I saw you talking to Archie earlier. He apologized to me the other day." Danny nodded as he smoothed the top of his hair which he had tied back in a hairtie. He always does this when he is unsure about something. He proceeds carefully on what he wants to ask.

"Yeah, he told me….Danny…" Lacey starts.

Danny's face looks confused. "Did you tell him to apologize to me?"

"No, he apologized on his own. He told me he had apologized to both you and Cole recently."

"Oh." Danny is surprised. He stands from the bed and advances closer to Lacey. Lacey wants to back up away from Danny but she refuses to show any weakness. She stands in the same place as Danny approaches closer.

"Well, I didn't expect that. I thought you had made him apologize. Interesting." He looks at Lacey intently. "Did Archie ask you to take him back?"

"That's none of your business." Lacey counters.

"He did, didn't he? I figured he did. That's what the hug was for, wasn't it?"

"Not that it matters to you, but the hug was for friendship."

"Oh, is that what they call it these days?" Danny says sarcastically.

"End of conversation, Danny. You can leave." Lacey is tired and wants to end the conversation.

"Sorry….Archie is not my best subject…but he did ask, didn't he?"

For a moment, Lacey does not answer. "That's between Archie and me…" Lacey begins.

Danny continues while nodding: "He asked you to take him back. I could tell that he did." He smiled slightly as he spread his arms to illustrate his point: "That's what I would do…what I'm trying to do – get the girl back that I was so stupid to let go. I should have fought for us. I know that now."

"It's too late, Danny." Lacey states. "I'm tired. I don't want to talk about things. I have said all I wanted to say four days ago."

Danny agrees: "Good, because I want you to listen."

"Danny…"

"You want me to leave? Then just listen for a moment. Please just hear me out, okay?" Danny again smoothes his hair and takes a deep breath while staring at the ceiling. Then, he turns his intense gaze on Lacey. "You want honesty…here's honesty – straight with no chaser – as they say. Please just listen for a little bit to what I have to say." Danny gestures for Lacey to sit down on the bed.

"I'll stand. I give you 10 minutes and that's it." Lacey doesn't know if she can stand being so close to him for more than that amount of time.

Danny looks at the girl he wants as he begins to speak the words he should have said to her long before now. "When I was sent to Juvie, I was thrown into a jungle where I had to learn to survive. I had no choice but to learn how to play the mind games, learn to strategize, learn how to read people, manipulate them, and convince them to be on my side. That place can change a person. What kept me halfway sane was my memories of what I left at home – you and Jo."

Lacey winced a little at his choice of words.

Danny continued: "A guard took me under his wing and then Charlie came. I had people now in my corner so I thought. When I got released, the last thing I wanted to do was come back here to Green Grove. Then, I thought that if I could at least I could re-connect with you and Jo, things could go back to how they used to be 'before'. I could work on my relationship with my mom and with you two. "

"Lacey, when I saw you two at school that first day, I couldn't believe how much older both of you looked. Then, I thought 'I must look old, too'. " Danny smirked at Lacey. She felt her face responding in a small smirk before she trained her face back to neutral.

Danny was undeterred. "That day at school, I noticed how beautiful you had become, Lacey. I was crushed that you and Jo didn't seem happy to see me. I was also crushed that you had a guy. At first, I was jealous because he was the new confidant in your life. Then, I was jealous because he was your boyfriend, and I wanted you as mine," Danny admitted.

"So, like Juvie, I strategized, smoozed, manipulated, and even convinced Jo to help get you back to talking to us. The closer I got to making you admit you had feelings like I did, the greedier I got. I had to get you to leave him – you deserved better than him. I wanted to be that better guy for you."

"When you left Archie, I was fine about keeping our relationship a secret. I enjoyed my private times with you. Then, everything imploded...the mess with the necklace happened and the tape of us came out as well as our fallout when our friendship with Jo suffered."

Again, the continued Jo references sting a little at Lacey. "Look, Danny, your time is up. It's late…" Lacey insists.

"Wait," Danny asserts as he pulls some things from his jacket and starts handing them to her one by one as he explains. "This is the picture that Charlie stole from me in Juvie. Notice the worn edges. Your side shows more wear. Here are the letters you wrote to me when I was first in Juvie – until one day they stopped. I missed getting those letters. Here's my journal I kept. Read it when I leave. Notice how many times your name is in it. Look at all the things I say about you."

Lastly, he hands her the box which contained that infamous bracelet from the night they had the breakup. He gently forces her to hold it as he gazes into her eyes. "That bracelet….I saw it and I remembered you wear bracelets so I wanted the most expensive I could find – not to bribe you but because I wanted you to have the best of anything I could afford to give you. That night, I had planned to 'wine and dine' you – spoil you with the best meal you've ever had at a restaurant with just the two of us. I even rehearsed how I would present the bracelet – at my favorite scenic spot by the water where you can see the bridge lit at night. "

Danny reminisced: "You were sooo beautiful…the most beautiful I have ever seen…" He smiled. "I wanted everything to be special since I ruined Homecoming night. I had even planned to end our special night with the two of us underneath the stars making love – my beautiful girl, a romantic spot – perfect." His smile faltered.

"When you called me out on my b.s., I got scared. I saw everything I had hoped for slipping away. Something was happening again to me out of my control but this time I was the one causing the damage. I was the one destroying my life. I kept trying to defend myself. A lot of stuff got said that night. Then, you accused me of using you as substitute – that 'Jo was always the one'. That caught me by surprise. I was so messed up. I wasn't thinking that night. I was guilt-ridden and sleep-deprived.

"I was so angry – angry that I couldn't fix things…angry that money couldn't buy me happiness or fix things…andgry that you saw through me…angry at the disappointment in your eyes…the disgust on your face…"

"Danny…" Lacey tries to interrupt…

"But that is over. I have been seeing a physchologist recommended by my doctor at Juvie. It helps to talk through some of the stuff that has been happening to me during Juvie and during my time back at home. I am learning that I don't have to be my father. I know that now. I made peace with the role I played in his death. I'm even working with the police to find out who scared my father into running."

Danny continued: "Jo and I sorted through that mess when I thought I had confused feelings for her." Lacey tenses. Danny pressed on as he moved a little closer: "We both agreed it was 'friendship love' – not 'romantic love'. I have only felt romantic love for one person. One might think she is a 'snow queen' but that is a disguise because once you know her, you discover she is just as beautiful inside as she is outside. She has the most amazing smile with the most perfect dimples."

Lacey's eyes widen as she gazes in his eyes and listens intently. "She's sexy, smart. She's your biggest supporter. When she is in your corner, most of your battles are already won. And I want her to be in my corner again, in my life. I love her, love everything about her: her stubbornness, her strength…everything. I would do practically anything to get her back, earn her forgiveness."

Danny places his hands on either side of her face as he wills her to believe his words: "If you want time, I can wait, but please don't say 'no'."

Lacey tries to speak. Danny plows ahead: "Archie asked for a chance at friendship. I ask for a chance at friendship, too. If you decide that this is all you can give to me, then I will just have to make peace with that. But please don't fully shut me out like you have been. I can't not have you in my life. I'm miserable without you. Don't make me live without you again. Juvie took you away from me before. Please don't let my stupidity take you away from me now. Please, Lacey….please…" Danny's voice cracks and his eyes begin to water.

Lacey looks away from the intensity of his eyes for a moment. "Danny…" She couldn't say anything more. The lump in her throat refused to clear. She was afraid she would start crying again as her eyes began to water. She closed them for a moment to get centered again. She tried again: "Look, Danny, things are just too…"

Danny interrupted. He wanted to get all his thoughts out since he didn't know how long Lacey would listen to him. Whenever he needed to talk before, Lacey would jumped to conclusions or leap to voice her opinions whenever she thought she needed to make a point.

Danny, who normally would hold his feelings close to the vest as he learned in Juvie, had learned to become tight-lipped on what information you held until you discovered what the other person knew or felt. He knew he needed to put everything "on the table" – to be honest with everything to Lacey. He tried to express all he needed to address with Lacey: "I know…I laid a lot on you but you have to know where my mind and heart are. Life has gotten so twisted, so crazy, but I want you to know how I truly feel. I love you, Lace…always will…"

"Danny…" Lacey begins.

Danny touches her arm tenderly, which stills her into silence. His touch always affects her. "Shhh…" He places his thumb gently on her lips to keep her quiet. However, when he touches her, he is as affected by Lacey as she is by him. "Let's not ruin the moment. Let me hold you just for a minute." Danny takes a deep breath, fully exhaling as he felt the weight being lifted from his shoulders. He had held these feelings inside for so long, too scared to say the words aloud when most of his plans have gone awry. He didn't want to voice his innermost desires when he hasn't had many desires to materialize for him. He had laid his soul bare tonight. He couldn't voice anything more. He held Lacey in his arms for several minutes…for as long as Lacey would allow him. He always loves hugging Lacey close. It always settles whatever anxiety he feels. He holds Lacey several minutes but it feels like more to him. He reluctantly pulls away from Lacey as he explains "It's late. I better let you get some sleep. Besides, my mother has become super-protective lately with all the craziness that has happened the past couple of months." He ran both hands down Lacey's arms. He feels her take a deep sigh as she gazes down. Danny places his hand softly under Lacey's chin to make her raise her gaze to him. As she raises sad eyes, still bright with unshed tears, to lock with Danny's melancholic expression, Danny's heart seems to skip as he realizes how close he has become to being a closed chapter of Lacey's life. His mind and heart solidify to make sure that doesn't happen. He needs Lacey. She needs him. For now, he must be content to give her time to digest what he has said. Her anger and sadness both echo the same thing: her heart still was connected to him somewhat.

Danny is unable to stop himself as he gingerly kisses Lacey's forehead, places a signature nose kiss, and is compelled to kiss those plush lips if only for the briefest of a sweet kiss. Lacey returns his kiss letting it linger between them before they mutually pull away to rest their foreheads against each other…each not really wanting to end this physical connection but there is a vast amount of issues that need to be settled but wouldn't this particular night.

Danny gives a small side smile – resigned that at least he presented Lacey with total honesty and he hopes that will be enough to sway her towards believing in him again. He gives a nod as he says "Goodnight" and slowly turns to leave to out Lacey's window.

After Danny's exit, Lacey is more confused than ever. Does she take a chance with Danny with all the complications involved with him? Does she go with the "safety" of Archie for a second time? After all, he treated her like a queen before Danny arrived. Should she instead remain single and concentrate on "Lacey" for a while and slow re-establish herself into what she wants to be without the identity of "someone's girlfriend"?

She sighed as she changed into pajamas as she fell into bed to try to get some sleep. Her headache from earlier in the evening was now progressively worse. She hoped that the pain meds would eventually work. She reasoned that her scattered thoughts would gel into clarity when the morning came…or at least she hoped.

When did 16 become this hard and why did it feel like this single decision would affect the rest of her life? Maybe she needed more than one night to think things through. Maybe space away from Green Grove would provide her the answers she sought. Too many "maybes" for one night.

DimplesValntina