Disclaimer: If it belongs to J.K.Rowling, it does not belong to me.

Second Chances

Chapter four: If Only

"The spies have found Lia Strummings, my lord."

"So... She is back. I suspected as much."

"She is currently at Hogwarts. Should I… arrange a fatal accident?"

"Not yet."

"Ah Lia, you're back. May I speak to you for a moment?"

I turned and Dumbledore gestured to an empty Charms classroom. I noticed it was the one that Ellie had taken me to when she'd found out I was a Sabi. I nodded, smiling slightly at the memory, then turned my attention to Dumbledore.

Dumbledore smiled, "Lia, do you remember Hagrid's lesson?"

I nodded. "Yes."

"Well, he told me how well you worked with the Pegasus, and the fact is the school is in a bit of a pickle without a Care of Magical Creatures teacher. I am asking if you would like to take Hagrid's position temporarily while he is away."

My first thought was, I don't know the first thing about animals! But the more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a good idea. It would give me a chance to find the Sabi and it would give me something to do.

"Um, sure, I guess so."

Dumbledore rubbed his hands together and grinned. "Excellent. I'll have Issy bring Hagrid's lesson plan up to you. You're next lesson won't be until Thursday. Is that all right with you?"

"Um, sure, I guess so."

"Wonderful." He walked merrily away leaving me to wonder what in heck I'd gotten myself into.

Sure enough, by the time I got back to my room, Issy the house-elf had delivered Hagrid's badly written and poorly spelled lesson plans. It took a while, but after a while I figured out what each of Hagrid's classes had and hadn't been done.

With disappointment, I noticed that the third years had covered, (along with countless animals I'd never even heard of) the only magical creature I knew anything about- unicorns. I wondered if I should go tell Dumbledor that I'd changed my mind.

I kept leafing through the numerous pages and discovered that Hagrid (bless him) had planned one or two lessons ahead for each of his classes.

My first class would be Gryffindor and Slytherin fifth years: Harry's class. Hagrid had them down to study Gumbles.

Leafing through a reference book that Issy had kindly left behind, I read that a Gumble 'is a gentle, pale creature that can be squashed into any shape without being hurt at all.' Apparently they liked warm weather and were found most commonly in Australia. I remembered that when I was a kid, Tahnee and I used to squash them into jam jars and keep them as pets (until they got away). Back then, however, we used to call them Squish.

Hagrid was pretty sure there was a family of them living in the rocks around the hot springs a few miles from Hogsmeade.

I decided I should go see them. But first, I'd need to go to the kitchens for some jam jars.

Tahnee Cottleslow stepped off the Muggle plane and took her first deep breath of English air. Funny; it was just like Australian air, a bit colder maybe, but still the same. She guessed air was just air, no matter where you were.

She sighed and went to collect her things.

The feelings were stronger here. Tahnee still couldn't decide this was a good or bad thing. If she were right, would it not prove she was sane and normal like any other witch or wizard? Or, if she was wrong, would it merely show that everybody she knew was right, that she really was insane?

There was only one way to find out.

So it was off to Hogsmeade, to find the girl that nobody knew.

"Remus?"

Remus looked up from the morning paper. "Yes, Padfoot?"

"What do you think would go better with jam, salami or pineapple?"

"Good grief Sirius, why can't you eat like us normal people?"

"My dear Moony, I lived off tasteless white mush and, if I was lucky, an occasional rat for far to long. I think I deserve to eat whatever I want to, don't you?"

Even though his tone was light, the somber words were enough to blacken Remus' already somewhat dark mood. "Go with the salami Sirius. Just don't make me eat it."

Sirius laughed heartily (How come he gets to be in a good mood? Remus thought, although he wasn't really bitter) and started to place salami slices over his jam.

Remus wrinkled his nose and stood up. "I'll leave you enjoy that on your own, Padfoot."

I hadn't been intending to walk past Remus' house, but I did and when I saw Remus tending to his garden I called out.

"Hullo, Remus."

He looked up and smiled. "Hello Lia. Out for a walk, are you?"

"Not really," I gestured at the jam jars, "I'm off to catch some Gumbles."

"Oh? Want to relive your childhood, do you?" Remus asked me with a twinkle in his eye.

"No, not really," I answered. "I'm taking over for Hagrid while he's on business."

"As Care of Magical Creatures professor?" Remus raised his eyebrows.

"Yep."

He grinned. "That's great. I didn't know you liked animals."

"Animals and I have a very intimate relationship," I stated truthfully. "Wanna help?"

"I suppose I could do with some childhood re-living. But I'd better get Snuffles first or he'll most likely kill me."

Catching Gumbles, as everyone knows, is a very delicate business. It's like fishing: one has to be motivated, resourceful and very, very patient.

Sirius was none of these things. Well, perhaps he was motivated, but this so called motivation was not focused on catching Gumbles, it was focused at scaring them away.

Not that he meant to. Snuffles the dog knew how fun Gumbles were. Next to nothing hurt them and they died only of old age and very complex curses. They were like rubber toys that lived. (Or perhaps chew toys, Snuffles mused.)

"Snuffles!" Lia yelled once Sirius had scared off yet another Gumble. She aimed one of her tins at the goofball dog, but he darted out of the way, grinning doggily at her.

Remus chuckled and held up his tin, which was full of a rather annoyed Gumble. "How many do you want?"

Lia rolled her eyes. "Show off."

Sirius eyed the Gumble greedily. Remus caught his look and shook his head. "Don't even consider it, Snuffles."

Snuffles barked in vague annoyance and ran off to find something else to chase.

"If it's no inconvenience, would you mind letting us go?"

I put the three Gumbles (still in their jam jars) on my bed. "Sorry guys. I'll need you for a few days, but if you promise not to run away, I'll let you out of the jars."

"That would be nice."

"Yes, that's fair."

"Very good of you."

I pulled them out one by one and watched as they returned to their normal blobby shape.

"So," I said, keeping a watchful eye to make sure they didn't make a break for it. " What are your names, anyway?"

"Happigumble. I'm three hundred in Gumble years."

"Jolligumble. I'm three hundred and twenty nine in Gumble years."

"Merrigumble. I two hundred and seventy in Gumble years"

The three Gumbles settled on my bed and looked up and me with their big unblinking eyes.

"If you don't mind telling us," said one (Happigumble?), "what's your name? And why can we understand you?"

"My name is Lia, and you can understand me because I'm a Sabi."

"Really?" They sat up with interest, "we were of the understanding that there were no Sabis left."

"Oh, there are. I'm not the only one; there's another."

"Really?"

"Yes. But I don't know who she is. She's here at Hogwarts somewhere; I just have to find her."

The Gumbles nodded wisely (why did they have to do everything in unison?) and one of them said, "We can understand why you would want to find such a person. Our friends will be very happy to know there are Sabis left."

"Uh, yes, I'm sure they would be."

One of the Gumbles nodded importantly- it looked rather like waves in the sea- and said, "My father, Cheerigumble (he was seven hundred and one in Gumble years when he died), always said Sabis still existed. If he were here, he would tell you to be careful Lia, for a Sabi's life is a dangerous one."

Well, duh.

Sirius arrived back from Gumble hunting in good spirits, unlike Remus, who was in a very bad mood indeed.

"What's wrong with you?" Sirius asked as soon as he was back in human form.

Remus raised a somewhat irritated eye brow at his friend. "What makes you think there's even anything wrong?"

"Dog intuition."

Remus shrugged. "Your dog intuition must be a bit rusty, Sirius. I'm fine."

Sirius considered making a snide comment but decided not to, at was best not to push Remus when he was grumpy. Instead, he watched his werewolf friend leave the room to go add the finishing touches to his herb shop that was opening in a few days.

Sirius had more important matters to attend to. There was a jam and salami sandwich on the counter just begging to be eaten, and who was Sirius to disagree?

Remus' problems would just have to wait.

Remus very much hated it when Sirius was right. It only added to his unfavorable mood, which was unfavorable enough already.

He had been slightly sour all day, which was understandable, as the previous night had been the first full moon.

Even so, tinkering about with his plants was usually enough to lighten him up considerably.

Usually.

Remus realized he'd been watering the floor and sighed. There were several possible causes for his current frame of mind. Usually Sirius or You-Know-Who were the culprits.

But You-Know-Who hadn't made any appearances since his stunt at the Tri-Wizard tournament, and Sirius had been rather perky since 'meeting' Lia.

That left only one more likely cause. The one that Remus hated most.

Ellie.

Remus had gone into a bit of a tailspin after Ellie had so suddenly left and it wasn't until the end of the year that he'd managed to pull himself slightly back together.

The main reason for this was Remus' addiction to 'what if's and 'if only's.

If only I'd paid more attention to her, I'd have seen it coming.

If only I'd followed her from the common room that day.

If only I hadn't have listened to Sirius and James.

If only this, if only that.

In time Sirius, James and Peter had convinced Remus that 'if only's and 'what if's were a waste of time.

Actually, it had been more Peter and James' doing, for Sirius had been preoccupied around that time. He'd been convinced that something wasn't right, that something was wrong. They all felt the same way, but Sirius more so.

It all began when that Ravenclaw died- a girl they'd never spoken to in their lives.

Understandably, I felt slightly stupid walking up to my room from the kitchen laden with bags of Brussels sprouts which, according to the Gumbles, were the best food in the world.

I turned the corner and almost ran the DADA professor down.

"Oh, sorry."

"That's all right... Lia isn't it? The new CMC professor?"

"Yes, but I'm afraid I don't remember your name..."

"Tammy Whitton."

I shook her hand. "Pleased to meet you. I'd better be off, my Gumbles may start a rebellion if I don't get these sprouts to them soon."

She laughed and walked away, leaving me to wonder why I was sure I'd met her before.

The next few days passed without event. I spent them brushing up my magic and learning some of the spells I would've learnt in my sixth and seventh year.

Far too soon for my liking, I was waiting outside Hagrid's cabin for the Gryffindor and Slytherin fifth years.

Unlike the lesson with Hagrid, they arrived at the same time, griping and groaning about potions. (At least, the Gryffindors griped and groaned; the Slytherins just smirked unpleasantly).

I took a deep breath and smiled at them. "Good morning, my name is Lia Strummings. I'll be teaching you while Hagrid is away on business. You can call me Lia, or Professor Strummings, whatever takes your fancy."

A girl I recognized as Harry's friend Hermione smiled encouragingly.

I gestured to the crate at my right, in which the Gumbles were discussing Brussels sprouts and the weather. "Today, we will be taking a look at Gumbles." I opened the crate and everyone gathered around for a look.

A pale-haired Slytherin wrinkled his nose. "They look like newborn rats."

Harry's red-headed friend Ron looked at the Gumbles, then at the Slytherin, and back at the Gumbles. "That's funny, Malfoy; I don't see the resemblance."

I raised a hand to cut short the many snickers coming from the Gryffindors (though I was trying not to snicker myself).

For the rest of the lesson, I told the kids everything I knew about Gumbles and demonstrated how they could be molded into different shapes. (A Gryffindor named Dean took one and molded into a rather lifelike model of Snape, which elicited applause from the Gryffindors).

The Gumbles cached along with me through out the whole lesson and none of my students appeared to be understanding them. This didn't surprise me, as the Sabi was supposed to be a sixth year.

The lesson finished (what had I been so afraid of?), but when all the other kids left, Hermione stayed behind.

I picked up the crate and smiled at her. "Can I help you, Hermione?"

She nodded. "I was just wondering if you're from Australia. You sound like you have a slight accent."

"It used to be stronger, but I've lived in England for quite a while now."

"So you are from Australia?"

We started back towards the castle. "Yes, why do you ask?"

"Oh, I just think the Australian culture is really interesting. That's all."

"Interesting? Don't you mean odd?"

Hermione blushed and I laughed. "Don't worry, I think it's odd too. But odd can be a good thing, don't you agree?"

Hermione nodded. "Yes, I do. Well, I'll see you next lesson, Professor."

"Bye, Hermione."

I watched her enter the great hall and smiled to myself. Hermione reminded me of Sarah-Jane. Of course, I hadn't seen Sarah-Jane, Clar, Tahnee or anyone in Australia in over a decade.

I didn't even want to know how long that was in Gumble years.

That evening, I took the Gumbles back to the hot springs. This exercise shouldn't have taken only five minutes. But Jolligumble told all of the other Gumbles that I was a Sabi, and I spent the next hour or so answering questions and taking advice.

Finally, I got away and started the journey home.

I paused outside of Remus and Sirius' house. A sign outside of the green house stated that the herb shop would be opening the following day.

I made a mental note and kept walking.

On the morning of the herb shop's grand opening, Remus was in much better spirits.

So was Sirius. But Sirius was always in a good mood after receiving a letter from Harry:

Dear Sirius,

Hello Padfoot, how are you? I'm fine, (even if Hermione and Ron, the paranoid twins*, are convinced I should be panicking and heading for the hills).

Quidditch is going great. I've really been putting my Firebolt through its paces. (Malfoy's deemed his Nimbus 2001 not good enough and has splurged on a Nimbus 2002).

There's a new professor filling in for Hagrid while he's away, Professor Strummings (Hermione says she's from Australia). She's pretty nice, we learned about Gumbles and for once I have to agree with Malfoy- did I just write that? Forget it- They look like baby rats.

How are things with Remus' shop? That's opening soon, isn't it? We have a Hogsmeade visit next weekend; I'll try to get time to come and see you.

That's all the news I have for now (unless you count Snape taking twenty points from Gryffindor because Ron's dragon scales were too green as news) so until next time, I write 'be VERY careful.'

Love,

Harry.

Once he'd finished reading, Sirius laughed. "'Be careful,' indeed. He sounds like James; he was always telling me to be careful."

Remus smiled in reflection, his tone slightly bittersweet. "And you always flung some smart-ass comment back at him."

"Who, me?" Sirius grinned. "C'mon, Moony, we'd better get out to this herb shop of yours."

"Lead the way, Snuffles."

After a few months posing as a Muggle, she'd settled safely into a daily and very much Muggle routine.

Wake up and clean her Muggle apartment. (Poky little hole.)

Take a walk around London. (Stupid city.)

Buy the daily newspaper. (Who cares if Brittany Spears had her nose done?)

Report to her job as a hair dresser. (That hair style would look simply marvelous on you. If you were fifty years younger.)

Have a coffee at the café down the street. (Coffee? Oh, you mean undiluted mud.)

Take the subway home. (Why do subway seats always make your butt ache?)

Take a sleeping pill and go to sleep. (Nightmares really suck.)

Of course, her day also involved forcing away the thoughts of a face that forever lingered in her mind without a name. It involved saving all her spare change for the homeless guy living on her block, trying to make up for something. It involved pushing away the longing to rejoin the wizarding world she had left behind.

And, in the minutes before the sleeping pills took her, it involved thinking of Remus.

Authors note: I am eternally sorry for the wait. It took quite a while to write and my computer conveniently broke down. On a happier note, Merry Christmas and a happy new year, (even if I am a bit late...) Thanks go to Serina Black for the help and Lone Astronomer for beta reading.