A/N: Wow, nice response to the last chapter :D I personally wanted it aborted because I couldn't write what I wanted that week, but hey you guys liked it and that's what counts. I was much happier with this chapter.
The weekend was as horrible as I had thought. Evil spoiled cousin of doom came along as well, and I nearly committed murder. BUT I'm sure I could still post in prison (:
Kate politely commented that my updates were getting close to the 5 day mark D: OMG I'm going to lose a toe *cries*. Doesn't help she was the bloody track star in school so running is pretty much out of the question!
...My stupid friend had Mambo #5 replaying for three hours while I was writing so blame any crackness in this chapter to him :( I was bashing my head on the desk by the end.
My OTHER friend also commented saying that if I didn't learn how to spell CAMARO right he would lock me inside the trunk of his 2009 model.... Jenn likey lol.
ON WITH THE SHOW!!!
Sam Witwicky: Project Anomaly
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the original characters or storyline regarding the Transformers universe both comic/television and movie (2007/2009). They are copy written to Hasbro, DreamWorks, and Paramount Pictures. I am just a twisted individual with spare time on her hands creating a warped version of the franchise.
General Warnings: Language, graphic violence, torture, possible rape, explicit sexual situations between robotic and non-robotic life forms, and of course; Sam's neurotic behaviour.
Warnings for this chapter: Language and mild sexual references and acts.
"Normal Speech"
'Internal Thought'
"Cybertronian"
"-Radio Transmission-"
Chapter Four: Lay Low
In which there are high speed chases and a talk about the...plugs and the sockets?
Starscream said nothing more. He merely flashed a grin of fangs at Sam's confused and furious expression.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he snapped, starting forward. Bee hurriedly grabbed his human's shirt with two fingers, hoping to keep the boy from any further foolishness. Sam was having none of it. "Let go, Bee!" he snapped.
The yellow bot's facial features replicated annoyance perfectly and he suddenly released the fabric causing Sam to crash to the street.
"What the fuck!" he hollered, scrambling up and facing his guardian. Sam never liked to swear, but he figured the occasion called for it.
Bumblebee placed his hands on his hips in a mocking fashion and chirped derogatorily.
Before Sam could move, Starscream snickered. "This is all very cute, but I'm afraid my time is limited. We will contact you in two days time, Allspark" The wailing sound of sirens echoed blocks away and without hesitation, the Decepticon leapt into the air, transformed into his alt mode, and tore away.
Sam's knees felt like water and he sunk to the street, fists slamming onto the pavement. It felt like there was a hole slowly opening up his middle, exposing every pulsing organ. He was angry. Angry at the government for not being capable enough, angry at the Decepticons for even abiding on this planet, angry at whatever was happening to him, and more than anything angry that everything wouldn't leave him alone.
A wave of exhaustion overtook him then and Sam's eyes drooped. He just wanted to sleep, find a bed somewhere dark and never come out from under the covers.
Something tickled the side of his hand and he looked down to see a few blades of grass poking through a crack in the street's surface. Something was wrong, however. His eyes narrowed and he tilted his head. He could hear...whispers.
"HEY! Get a picture of the aliens!"
Mikaela looked to see a crowd forming around their group. She scowled. This was going to get really bad, really quick. She ran over to Sam, who had not moved from the ground. "Sam! We got to go now!"
He didn't respond, he only lightly ran a finger up the blades of grass, concentrating on the shoot like it was a complex equation.
"Dude, leave the weeds, we gotta get out of here before more people show," Leo whispered urgently. "You know the government doesn't like paying people off."
At the mention of the government, Sam's dark eyes narrowed and he stood up looking at the crowd. "Don't transform," he told Bee and Arcee as he heard the clicks. "We don't need these people knowing more than they should."
They both nodded and stepped back in alarm as some of the humans began to walk closer, intent on touching them.
"Okay people, I know there is something here to see, but you're going to have to get your butts moving the other way," Sam announced.
"Who are you, buddy?" one man asked rudely, trying to capture a picture with his phone.
"Oh no one," Sam smiled. "Just the guy who is going to tell you that if you don't leave before the police get here, all your asses are getting hauled into a dark room by the feds where you'll be tortured for what you've witnessed today."
Some of the people in the crowd became nervous and left, but the majority stayed, sceptical.
"Yeah right, but the feds aren't going to figure out who posted what," another person voiced.
Sam glanced at Bee and grinned as the bot nodded. Immediately all the phones present began to ring and their owners looked at the devices in horror. Some answered the calls and screamed, dropping their phones and running. The others took the hint and left without any further motivation.
"What did you say?" Sam asked his guardian.
"-We are aware of the scenes witnessed by your person today and your rights are hereby suspended until our investigation is completed.- Bee smiled as Sam laughed. It was good to hear that sound again. The yellow Autobot once again grew worried. The fact that the boy was becoming more and more isolated and withdrawn was an issue in itself, but he had also grown angry at Bee. Sam had been frustrated, peeved, and of course irritated by him, but never angry. The Transformer would have to have a talk with his ward, and soon.
Bee gave a low warble and shifted into his Camaro form, opening his doors in welcome. Sam looked up as several police cars skidded around the corner and grimaced. A high speed chase, this would be fun.
"You idiots going to stand around all day and get captured or are your keesters going to move?" Wheelie snapped from the interior. All three humans sped towards Bee as Arcee also transformed back into her alternative form. Her hologram flickered and came online.
"We'll stay together for two point three miles and then split up. Hopefully they'll take me on. Keep your com link open so we can meet up later," she told Bee.
He revved his engine in response and anticipation. His rear wheels began to spin rapidly as the policemen drew closer, a thick cloud of grey smoke billowing behind him.
Sam laughed nervously. "Hey don't forget that you got three passengers in here, okay buddy?"
"What am I, chopped liver?" Wheelie sneered from beside Mikaela.
"You're something all right," he growled back.
"Sam be nice," she smiled, absently stroking the small robot's cranium. Sam scowled as the little prick sidled up closer to her, daring him to say anything else.
"We could always throw him out the window at the cops if things get too hot," he suggested, shrugging.
Before either Mikaela or her miniature companion could retort, Bumblebee leapt forward throwing his passengers back into their seats roughly.
"Hey! Watch it you big dumb can!" Wheelie screamed.
Sam gripped the leather seat as the Camaro drifted between two of the police cars and corrected, speeding away. He looked behind the seat to see the officers quickly turn their vehicles and continue their pursuit.
He shifted his gaze to Leo who was holding his head and chanting "oh no" and "oh god" over and over. Huh...and to think, he had been that pathetic two years ago when this was new to him.
Sam looked back as he felt a tug on his t-shirt. Mikaela was looking at him intently. "Sam we have to lose these guys!"
He only stared. "And...? What, like I'm a better driver than Bee? Don't think so."
She rolled her eyes. "Nice plan, fearless leader. Bee, do you have flares or anything to knock these guys out?"
Before their ride could reply, Arcee pulled up to their right. "Mikaela we are under strict orders from Optimus that no human is to be harmed."
"Well how do we get rid of them then?" she asked.
The hologram smirked. "We outrun em of course! You ready, Baby Bot?"
The Camaro's engine roared excitedly and Sam felt this was going to end badly. Arcee bolted ahead, swerving in and out of traffic effortlessly as if the cars were motionless. Bumblebee responded, quickly increasing velocity and narrowly missing the fellow vehicles. Leo was screaming in the back, Mikaela was grabbing the dashboard, and Sam was somewhere between the two reactions.
"Hey lug nut, slow down I like the view of the bike from behind," Wheelie shouted over the screams filling the cabin.
Mikaela let go of the consol and stared at the mini bot dangerously. "Care to say that again?"
"I'm so sorry, Goddess," he cowered. "I only have eyes for your legs." Her hand rose. "I mean YOU!"
"Better."
"Yah, what could be better? Having a toy truck hump your leg any chance it gets or having said perverted toy eye another girl? Hm, so hard to decide," Sam commented lightly.
"How about a boyfriend who has cheated on his girlfriend with two alien life forms?" she answered, smiling.
"HEY! Both of those were not my fault. First time I was basically mouth raped by a slimy wiggling..." Sam stopped, growing sick at the memory. "And the second time I was completely out of it and it didn't mean anything!"
The car suddenly veered right knocking the three teens into the upholstery and windows harshly.
"Ow, Bee! What the hell?"
"-You made your bed and now you're out of mine. You lie awake and I sleep just fine-" the radio crackled.
Sam eyed the player suspiciously, but didn't say anything.
"Dude I think I'm going to be sick," Leo moaned.
Now that he mentioned it, Sam felt nauseous again as well. Thinking about that psycho pretender bot didn't help things either. His stomach lurched and he covered his mouth. Not good. Bee would never forgive him if he puked inside him.
"How fast are we going?" he asked Mikaela who was holding her head.
"I think around two hundred miles," she replied quietly.
It wasn't the speed that was killing them, it was the constant motion and swaying as Bee manoeuvred around obstacles in the road.
"I didn't know humans could change their color," Wheelie commented eyeing Mikaela.
Sam wanted to laugh, but his stomach hurt too much and he couldn't risk the movement. 'Gotta focus on something else,' he thought. Anything to do with lights was bad news, so he shut his eyes and felt around.
Okay the leather seat that was good. He concentrated on the cool temperature, the slightly grained feel and the rough stitching. He palmed the material, grasping the curve of the bottom seat and lightly tracing his fingers back up the line of stitching.
Bee focussed his scanners on what exactly the boy was doing, while still maintaining a careful eye on the road ahead. Didn't Sam know that Cybertronians had sensors throughout their entire frame? Every inch was respondent to changes in pressure, temperature and atmosphere. If humans thought they were sensitive, they had no idea.
The yellow bot mentally froze as Sam once again ran his fingers lightly over the fabric, caressing it and then grabbing the seat. This needed to stop now! Bee nearly slid into the other traffic lane when Sam moved his ass right into the curve of the bucket seat, trying to get more comfortable.
Oh no.
...Acquiring Com Link signal.
Cybertronian signature confirmed.
"-Arcee, we must pull over soon!-"
"-What's up?-"
"-The humans aren't doing so well and there's other reasons.-"
"-Half a mile there's a-"
The Ducati swerved slightly in surprise as a long string of Cybertronian curses assaulted her link. "-What the hell was that for?-"
"-The human Leo just vomited in my backseat...-"
Arcee laughed hysterically and reduced her speed, now travelling at the recommended human law. The Camaro pulled up beside her and the hologram grinned cheekily at it.
"How was the ride, kids?"
"Oh my god get us out of here!" Mikaela groaned as the window rolled down. "It stinks!"
She smirked, eyeing the yellow hood. "I bet." The engine growled menacingly. The projection only laughed again. "Follow me, Baby Bot, let's get off this rode."
The two vehicles turned down a grid rode, secure in the fact that the police and not even air support had been able to keep up with their escape. Their activities had most likely been reported to N.E.S.T and other officials and a report to Optimus would be made in due time. For now, the two Autobots wanted only to remain hidden and to protect their companions.
It was nearly dusk when they rounded a hill and turned off road into a secluded grove. Bee dimmed his headlights and immediately threw open his doors allowing Sam and Mikaela to burst out. Leo was unfortunately thrown from the back as Bee transformed, wiping his mid back in disgust.
"Look, I'm sorry!" Leo yelled, getting up with his friends' help. "It wasn't exactly my fault!"
Bee began to click and chirp angrily, although the sounds were reminding them of very human swear words.
"Bee, we're sorry, but Sam and I nearly hurled too! We just love you too much to do that to you," Mikaela explained, hoping the furious Autobot would understand. "Besides, Sam can wash you when we get to his parent's house. You'd like that, wouldn't you?"
The yellow bot nodded happily and sat down heavily on the ground, joined soon by Arcee, who relaxed her wheel strut and leaned against him.
Sam eyed the two as they talked in their native speech. "So you two go a long way back, huh?"
The two looked up at him, and Sam blushed, realizing he had just interrupted a conversation and that was rude in any civilization.
"We've been comrades for millennia," Arcee answered politely. "I didn't know what happened to Baby Bot after we were captured by Swindle and Megatron." She looked at the taller bot and grinned. "Thought he got jacked into space for the longest time. Figures he would be the one to find the Allspark first."
"Oh," Sam replied, not knowing what else to say. He had never really imagined Bee's life before he met him, but the robot's existence went back thousands of years. There had to have been other adventures besides this one, other friends, other companions...
Bumblebee watched his human carefully, knowing something was troubling him. He remembered the way Sam touched him while they had been driving and he shivered again. Arcee glanced up at him, wondering.
"Sam and I need to talk," Bee explained.
"Oh no, we do not," he argued, planting his feet on the ground. "We need to sit here and wait for Optimus, and do no talking of any kind, and...why are you looking at me like that?"
The black and yellow bot's expression was determined and he lunged at Sam, but the lithe teen dodged and took off running.
"NO! No I said! Back off! NO!"
Bumblebee took off after the escaping boy muttering angrily at the human's ability to avoid every grab. He had to admit that the boy was remarkably fast, but the chase was getting annoying. He could reach speeds of 213mph and yet Sam was eluding him. If any of the Autobots saw this, he'd never hear the end of it.
"Sam please I only want to talk with you!"
"Sam doesn't want to talk, thank you!" he replied breathlessly, narrowly ducking as he entered part of a brush. Sadly his luck had run out and he hit a low branch hard. His vision exploded in stars and he fell backwards.
The earth rumbled as Bee came to stand beside him, looking down in sympathy. "Are you all right?"
Sam didn't say anything. He merely, rolled over, content to eat dirt for the rest of his life if it got this touchy feely transforming Chevy off his back.
Bee crouched down, gently tapping Sam's back with one finger, until the teen swung one arm half heartedly at the prodding appendage. It was hard to hit something from behind you when you were lying on your stomach, however, so Sam rolled over staring grumpily at the glowing blue optics above him.
"What?"
The recon bot hesitated and then his vocal capacitor sputtered. "Why don't you want to talk to me?"
Sam sighed, sitting up and shuffling over so he was leaning against Bee's bent leg. "It's not that I don't want to talk to you, Bee. I just don't want to talk about it. It shouldn't have happened, doesn't matter what's going on with me. I...shouldn't have used you like that."
"Used me?"
Sam's eyes narrowed. "This constitutes as talking about it."
The normally innocent looking face became stern then. "We are going to talk about this, Sam."
"I'm really tired, Bee. Can it be a short version tonight?"
The Autobot paused, thinking it over. "Agreed. So why are you so adverse to what happened between us?"
"I don't know," he mumbled, growing uncomfortable. "It's just weird. Guys just don't go around making love to the front side of their cars, you know?"
"You were outsourcing a tremendous amount of energy that night, Sam. Perhaps it was your body coping."
"You mean I was pent up and needed a quickie? That's a horrible thing to say, Bee."
The yellow bot sputtered. "I didn't say that!"
Sam grinned. It was so easy to rile his guardian. "I know. Look I don't know why it happened, it just shouldn't have happened, okay? Mikaela and I are dating, and it felt like cheating to me."
Bee grew solemn. "I was afraid that was the issue. Mikaela seemed quite distressed that I was...how do you humans phrase it? You're...first?"
Sam choked.
"She seems to have forgiven me, although I've read human females are notorious for storing mass amounts of information to be used at a later date."
"Ha, yeah." Sam scratched the back of his head. "Well you can understand why I feel bad now. I mean I'm sure you wouldn't cheat on your...mate, if you had one."
Bee tilted his head. "We cannot cheat."
Sam stopped. "What?"
The yellow Autobot really did hate to repeat himself. "We cannot cheat. It simply isn't in our programming. It is remarkable enough that we can find a compatible Spark Mate without risking said companion by being unfaithful. Our species has a difficult time reproducing, we cannot waste time, memory, and energy on trivial matters."
"Well la-dee-dah Mr. I'm Too Important and Advanced for Cheating," Sam quipped, crossing his arms. "Well here's something you maybe didn't Google, but cheating is a HUGE deal for us humans and I don't want to put Mikaela through that. I'm a one-girl guy."
"I'm not a girl," Bee frowned.
"I know that!"
"Then why would you say that you're a 'one-girl guy'? If you had another female you were courting, then I could foresee a problem-"
"BEE!" Sam sighed loudly, covering his face with his hands. "The point is the same as with you bots. We should be with one person!"
Bee scratched his cranium in confusion. "But my research has indicated that humans often engage in adultery, not to mention the fact that the terms known as 'swinging' and 'orgies' have become quite popular among your species."
Sam's eyes widened and he covered his ears, walking away. "I'm not having a sex discussion with my car. No, no, no-no-no!"
Bee scrambled to get up and slowly jogged after the retreating boy, who was now running at full pace. "But, Sam, you've missed the entire point of our conversation!" He bent down and grasped his human's shirt, effectively halting his retreat.
Sam glowered at the yellow bot as he hung in front of Bee's face like a kitten by the scruff of the neck. "Oh, please enlighten me. What was your point?"
"The point, Sam, is that we did in fact interface."
He grew uneasy. And it wasn't the fact that he was now dangling just over fifteen feet in the air. "...And?"
Bee made an annoyed sound. "Only Sparks that are compatible can interface!"
Sam sighed. "Bee, I don't have a Spark," he said as if explaining to a small child.
"Which is why this is even more confusing. Perhaps we should try it again to figure it out?"
The boy became pale. "NO you perverted hunk of tin, put me down!"
Bumblebee scowled. "There is no need to be rude, Samuel."
"Do not call me that!"
"And why not?"
"Only my mother calls me that!"
"But Optimus refers to you in such a matter..."
"Yeah well, he is kind of motherly if you think about it." Sam squinted in thought and then horror dawned on his face. "...I just pictured him in an over-sized pink apron."
Bee's bright blue optics flickered rapidly and then he burst out in chittering laughter. Sam couldn't help it and joined in. Everything seemed okay now. This was how it should be, joking around with his best friend, with Autobots and Mikaela nearby. Safe.
Sam yawned loudly. When he opened his eyes Bumblebee had shifted back into the Camaro with the door opened for him. He smiled tiredly and hopped into the interior, clambering into the back seat and taking off his shoes. The radio crackled once and a slow peaceful melody filtered into the cabin. Sam sighed and breathed in the scent of oil, leather, and oddly, that new car smell. If Megatron suddenly decided to glass the planet right then and there, Sam decided, he could not imagine a better way to go than falling asleep in Bee while the world burned around them.
A/N: Way to go Ratchet, your plot Windex sucked ass, people are more confused than EVAR! Plus... you didn't really get any story time... to use it...*cough*...:D But I like it like that! :P Like I said, I get kind of tired reading the same plot lines all the time, and I tend to make horrific mutated story babies in my laboratory and I can assure you this "plot" will be original if nothing else lol.
Review Responses:
Micah Eruviel- Yay happy to hear it! Oh he will, he's just being silly freak out spazz Sam right now. He'll calm down eventually, with either medication or Bee hitting him over the head. Whichever works (: Yep Sam is, though this won't be your typical Sam/Allspark story. Glad to hear from you.
Cocoa Jamboree- LOL to tell you the truth that "transformer blew" part was purely coincidental! I just wrote it and then I was proof reading and stopped and re-read it and had a laugh fit. I think my mind is perverted enough without me! I am 100% with you on the non-innocent Bee, those cute little beeps he makes are a FRONT. I don't know if you saw T2, but after Bee bursts out of the garage to save Sam and his dad from the Kitchen bots and Sam tells him to get his butt back in there, his chirpy voice sounded suspiciously like "you asshole"....Plus the whole playing matchmaker with Sam and Mikaela...we got a devious yellow bot on our hands! Well even as a kid I didn't get how there could be "boy" and "girl" robots. Although the crushes between them on the show were cute. I just think as super advanced robots that they would have a method of reproducing other than "insert plug A into socket B" . Hope you liked this chapter!!
sayin-girl- OMG *chomps energon* and then gets stomach cancer :D WOOO now I can write in the hospital without fear of life trying to keep me away from the story! I wonder if that would actually work...maybe I'll break my leg and see..lol. I think story-starved fans would be as bad as zombies D: I fear you/them so I shall write faster!!! XD And thanks for the review!
Fk306 animelover- A thank ya! And there will be plenty more (:
ryu433 – Rachet's Windex did nothing!!! D: silly medic robot! Aw Bee, sorry I couldn't update this weekend. You could so vaporize my family for me (we will tell Optimus NOTHING), and I put some mild smex in here just for you as way of an apology (: And don't worry about Hide and Arcee, we all love you!!
Sup Ironhide ;) Lol. *shrugs* I just have a thing for large cannons what can I say.
my renji-kun- Are you confused again??? HUH??? Lol. :3 there was some minor Sam/Bee in this one, but as if I'll forget to mention more mature content. I get perverted really fast and it will show in this story haha. Glad you liked it!
Jane Pierre- I know I have that problem too!!! I read like 3249234 words a second and then it's done ): Saaaad face. UGH I don't know what to tell you D: I hope you won't be disappointed and that I don't lose you as a reader because you're awesome, but to each his/her own. *crosses her fingers* lol. But you know what, if you lose interest in this story I would be more than happy to write you a ficlet on your wishes (this is what this story is anyways lol). OMG when you said hormonal I was like PREGNANT! :O what a twist that would be, but no she's just having her own ways of dealing with the situation. Personally, I would have waved goodbye and gone to live in the tropics a LONG time ago...if it wasn't for the fact that there were sexy transforming aliens... *cough*.
P.S. FREAKING CATS!!! XD
Kemotolvm- Silly website not sending you an update :O *shakes fist* but that's ok! Yah, I don't believe in sugar innocent Bee haha. Sam will soon find that out :3 Ratchet's plot cleaning FAILED! He should be ashamed XD. Well he doesn't go...yet, but Decepticons are going to be coming soon :D And thanks! (:
CuriousDreamWeaver- *writes faster* LOL I was so supposed to go to the bank today to go get a currency exchange for my trip in October and I was like NO I will UPDATE 0_0 lol. God, I want to write and life is being LAME. Too bad for it, life is on HOLD! :D Happy to see the laughs from you:D
Rubyswordmaster- WOOO long reviews!! Lol Google! I heart Google. Wikipedia is still a 50/50 for me. I hate when people quote it like the effing Bible...it's not 100% reliable yet peeps...yeesh.
:D Oh yes there will be the old characters coming in like crazy! I was kinda pissed at the movie though because they destroyed like 99.9% of the Cons...I was like where the hell am I going to get new ones? So I worked that in. Sideswipe will be a major player and so far Streaker isn't here...yet! :D
I know hey. People just need to relax...it's entertainment and T2 was never meant to be Oscar material so settle the hell down! Lol.
Awesome thanks! (: I know what you mean, though. I like dialogue but there's some times when authors make it pointless and filling. That's a no no for me! Catch you next time!!
Illyric- :O naw it's ok lol. Actually I think it's more a one-sided fling anyways. Megatron is too busy frothing at the mouth for domination to notice. . WOW thanks! Well as to the Phoenix comment, that's exactly how I would imagine it to be! The Allspark is a conscious being of Primus so it's not like a simple rubix cube XD some people forget that. Glad to see you like it and thanks for the review!
Army of Smith- :D whoop! And you shall have more! Lol.
Demonically Angelic Neko88- First off, nice name! :D Yes we all have a great laugh at Sam's expense :P And thank you, thank you, and thank you! :3
All righty then, now that the update schedule is more or less back on track, I shall see you guys Thursday/Friday!
~Jenn