Chapter 4

Here's chapter 4! I've got a new laptop but I started this fanfic on my old one... also I just got back from a residential with school so I couldn't access the internet!

That said I'm starting another fanfiction (Though I promise to update this one!) which will be a Spamano fic. So if you're interested you can check it out but I haven't got the chapters up yet!

Let's get on with it then!

Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia!

The lesson ended at 10:50 am, and the bell signalled the time for second break. Matthew quickly shoved his books into his bag and rose from his seat, hoping to get to the bathroom without any distractions. But today seemed to be the day for bad luck when Antonio and Francis blocked Gilbert's way, so Matthew was stuck behind him.

"In trouble already, Gil?" Francis tutted. Looking at him this closely it was obvious why he was popular. His silky blonde hair, his light stubble and blue eyes that reminded Matthew so much of the sky that it was if he was looking up on a clear day. The only thing that ruined his flawlessness was his flirtatious personality. Though his friends and followers found it charming and brave, Arthur Kirkland saw it as perverse and cocky. Or so he claimed.

This was old news though. At least three times a week Matthew overheard their lover's quarrel or people talking about rows that they had after school. He didn't mean to eavesdrop but he probably knew more about the student body than people liked to think. He knew all the romantic things Francis said to Arthur in French (Matthew took it as an option for GCSE), he knew how Lovino secretly opted to do Spanish classes and he knew about Ludwig's' not-so-secret crush on Feliciano. There seemed to be as many gay relationships in this school as there was different nationalities.

"I see you've been making the boys cry, mi amigo." Antonio jerked a thumb in Mattie's direction. He blinked, realizing how his eyelashes still felt wet from his little teary moment, much to his embarrassment.

Gilbert flushed a little but smiled nonetheless. "Nah, Mattie's cool."

Cool?

Matthew held back his laughter. He may be many things (Shy, quiet and bland were three things that came to mind) but cool was not one of them. It took a moment for him to realize that the three of them were watching him expectantly. After years of wanting to say so many things, it came as a surprise to him that he couldn't speak now. Some sort of incoherent noise arose from his throat, which would have been humiliating if Gilbert wasn't there to intervene.

An arm slipped over his shoulders, and Gilbert laughed in his odd little way as he directed him out of the classroom and into the not-too-crowded hallway where they stood at the window and resumed their conversation.

"This is the guy I'm spending that shitty detention with tomorrow." He informed the other two. They both shook their heads at Gil, as if it was typical of him to get into trouble before lunch time, even though they themselves had only met the guy... perhaps over the weekend. Envy shot through Matthew like an arrow. Sixteen years of being around these people and none of them really remembered him, but this guy had been here a few days and already he had more friends than he did.

"- And so I said to her-" Shrugging off Gil's' arm, Matthew headed for the bathroom, checking over his shoulder once or twice to make sure the Prussian wasn't following him. He wasn't.

A small, practically microscopic, part of himself felt a tiny bit disappointed. When he reached the cubical, closing the door and bolting it shut, Mattie pulled up his T-shirt and inspected his bruise. Nothing much had changed, but then again, it had been little over an hour since he last checked the ugly bruising. The swelling had gone down, to some relief.

No matter how he looked at it, with Gilbert's sudden attention, and his emotional... moments, today was going to be a long day.

So the final bell rang at 3:30 in the afternoon, as per usual and Matthew grabbed his bag and hurried out of his last lesson, Physics. Following the crowds of students out of the gates. There were two roots which Matthew could take; the short way down the main streets, where most of his fellow students lived. Or he could go the long way, which went round all the main accommodations and through the business estates on the edge of the city centre. Even though it was longer, with a view that wasn't as nice as the way Alfred took to get to his house, Matthew's old home, it was the best way to keep out of the way of people who might find out where Mattie lived.

The area was noticeably run down, neglected by the council, and many of the buildings were owned by private investors who rented out rooms and flats, like the one where he lived. It had gotten a name for itself; 'North Tracks'. Not a complicated story, really. It was, as the name says, on the North side of an old railway track that was seldom used these days. Rumours had spread about violence and drug use and alcohol abuse... most people would tell you it was a type of dystopia. But as Mattie walked down the busy streets, he couldn't help but think about how wrong that generalisation was. Even though the area was physically run down, the community was one of the strongest. Despite this... he missed his old home. He missed Alfred, no matter how annoying he could be. He missed his dad most of all.

Passing a few familiar faces, he made his way up the stairs of the flat and unlocked the door to his sickly smelling home.

It seemed his best attempts of cleaning the latest layer of vomit out of the carpet wasn't enough, he'd missed a bit on the sofa, and the daily heat made it worse. Matthew settled down his bag, opened a window and took out the bucket from under the sink once again and got to work scrubbing the fabric, though it the couch had been ruined when they bought it. The dishes from breakfast were still in the sink, so that was the next thing to do before taking his bag to his room and completing the homework he'd received from math before getting dinner ready for six; steak marinated in maple syrup. Many people found it disgusting, but it gave the meat a sweet and savoury flavour which Matthew adored.

As he was setting the table, he heard the high pitch-clicking of his mother's heels on the landing.

'It's amazing she can walk properly in them even when she is sober.' Mattie thought to himself as he placed the food on the table with somewhat shaky hands.

The door to the apartment opened hard and rebounded on the wall with a loud thud as Miss William's staggered into the room in a post-drunken state, signalling the start of the evening routine: She'd come home, have something to eat, change into some party clothes and attend any party or gathering she's been invited to, or just go to the pub, come home, give Matthew his daily screaming match, throw up, got to bed. Mattie was at least thankful for two things: One; she ate something before she went out which dulled the effect the alcohol had on her. Two; her night-outs gave him a much needed break from his responsibilities. Looking after his mother, being the parent, was hard and exhausting and even though he hated her going out and getting drunk, it was much better, and less scary, than when she brings the party back to the small apartment with its thin walls and nicotine stained ceiling.

The two ate in silence, the only sound that could be heard was the deep, low hum of the fridge and the scraping of knives and forks against plates. Not even a word was spoken as she placed the cutlery on the now empty plate and left the room to get ready, which left the young boy to get a head start on the dishes.

It was at least an hour before his mother stepped out of the room wearing a pair of red high-heels that laced up to her thigh, tight blue shorts that were little more than a strip of denim and a crimson blouse that tightened at the waist and showed a little more cleavage than Mattie liked to bear thinking about.

"I'm going." She croaked as she pulled a carton of cigarettes out of her purse and placed one between her chapped lips that had been masked by red lipstick.

"Okay, mama..." Matthew scolded himself for sounding so childish and fragile. He was sixteen years old, he could look after himself! Not to mention his accent slipped through, a hint of French from his dad's side. Though his mother had probably killed a few hundred brain cells in her drinking years, her hearing was impeccable. The younger boy dared to glance up briefly, just long enough to catch her stone cold glare before she went back to inspecting the carton.

"I swear I had more..." Matthew's breath hitched and he tried hard to focus on the dishes, scrubbing harder and faster than necessary. Perhaps he had underestimated his mother's memory.

Then, without warning, Matthew felt a bony, nicotine stained hand grip his shoulder, spinning him around to face her.

"Did you take them?" She hissed through her loose teeth. "DID YOU?!"

"N- No... No, I didn't!" Her hand dropped to her side and Mattie breathed a small sigh of relief, turning back to the dishes. As she hobbled off. Soapy hands shook as he cleaned the last of the plates and placed it on the rack to dry. His mind went back to his comforting thoughts that clouded his mind on nights like this. In two years he could legally leave this place and never come back. He could get a job and earn some money to start a business... maybe a pancake hut somewhere in the mountains of Canada. And perhaps he'd get a real bear, not a stuffed one like he had now. The thought of having his own place far away from the smoke and beer riddled house that he currently inhabited was so sweet he found himself adding little details. His house would be hidden by the trees, up a mountain, but close enough to a small town where everyone knows each other, everyone knows him! Some of the house will be made of wood, the rest of stone, and it would have lots of big windows and a long drive so he could admire the beauty of his creation. There would be a lake nearby that would freeze in winter so he could go and play hockey or just mess around. He'd go to the bar every other Friday to meet new people but would not get completely pissed so he'd remember who they were! And the best part... they would remember who he was.

Mattie was so caught up in his fantasy life that he didn't hear the sound of his mother's six-inch heel fuck-me-boots clacking away on the cold kitchen floor. In fact... he wouldn't even have noticed she was there if she had not brought him down to earth with a sharp, fierce slap to the face, curling her fingers up almost immediately after they made contact so her nails dug deep into his pale skin, opening it up, letting the blood come to the surface. Matt gave let out a cry of pain and fear as he clutched his bleeding cheek with one hand and balanced himself on the counter with the other. Looking up to meet his mother's eyes, he caught a glimpse of the two cigarettes in her hand he'd stolen the night before. She must have gone through his bag.

Before he could respond, Miss Williams brought back her fist, releasing it from where it had been level with her waist and brought it up to connect with her sons stomach, sending him onto the floor, curled up, clutching his abdomen. Gasps escaped from his throat and he barely managed to stand.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Please stop!" Matt cried, as he held back the bile threatening to make an appearance. It felt ten times worse than getting a hockey puck to the jaw, which was her next target as she crouched down and landed an uppercut punch left of Mattie's chin. He screamed but even that was painful. The minutes that followed were filled with a cry for every kick to the stomach, a choke for every fist to the face, a scream for every hit to the ribs. Matthew was thankful when she left, even though she spat on him as she did so. It was impossible to say which part of him hurt more. Unlike last night's single mark, he was too afraid to look at the multitude of bruises that littered his body like stars on a clear night sky. So instead he just lay on the floor, sobbing, gasping, and swallowing whenever his dinner felt like making a reappearance. The blood from his cheek and various other grazes left little splatters on the floor and on his clothes and though cleaning it up would help him forget it later, the blonde didn't look forward to moving his aching limbs.

Ten or fifteen minutes later and Matthew had managed to successfully pull himself up. His arms and shoulders tensed in pain, dizziness threatening to knock him back down on to the grimy kitchen tiles. Another five minutes and Mattie was stood up, using one shaking hand to balance himself on the counter. The plate that he'd been cleaning lay smashed near where he had fallen. Trying not to think of the broken pottery in fear of sparking off the pain, the teen made his way slowly to the bathroom, where hopefully a good soak in the steamy water might draw out some of the pain.

There hadn't been much blood to wash away and the hour soak in the bath did some good at relaxing his muscles. The tweezers had pulled out most of the shards from his skin and soon the plasters, bandages and cooling gel offered a little more relief. Not much but Mattie wanted to take what he could get. The broken plate was swept off of the floor and placed in the bin, the speckles of blood were mopped up and Matthew took his school bag and PE kit to his room.

It was whilst he lay in bed, thinking about the recent incident that the anger hit him. Why should he take care of her when all she ever does is hurt him? Why should he just stay with her and take this crap when he could go live with his dad and his brother? Why shouldn't he just smother her with a pillow whilst she slept?

Matthew's heart stopped. His mother may be an abusive, manipulative lush but he couldn't kill her... right? He could... if she was asleep. If his heart was in it he could overpower her. He shook his head. There's no way he would allow himself to think of such sinister things... Would he?

Shaking his wet blonde hair he rolled over and began his sleepless night.

Because I haven't updated in three months I decided to end the chapter early and post it... As I said earlier on I am working on other fanfics and I will hopefully find time for this one. Sorry for the three month gap! I had exams and other stuff going on so finding the time to update proved difficult! R&R!