Ninja Academy. Part 4- Rest and Relaxation, Yeah Right!
Friday night, after their tough training session in the village, the students of the Aya Uteo Ninjitsu Academy have been shuttled out of the camp and into the local city to enjoy their weekend. They are taken to stay in a large, mansion with all the latest luxuries for their comfort and convenience.
Galford- Oh wow! This place is amazing! We got a cinema screen TV with built in DVD player and surround sound here.
Ibuki- You guys should check out our rooms. Four poster beds with electric heated blankets.
Fuuma- All this place needs to be perfect is a French maid named Shermie to... HEY! (sees Shermie in a small, tight French maid's outfit) We have got one, hi Shermie. This is officially the greatest house ever.
Shermie- Hi everyone. I'm Shermie, and I'll be you servant during your weekend. KTV have asked me to ensure that your needs are seen to and that your stay here is a pleasant one. If everyone would like to come to the dining room, I have your dinner ready.
Kyo- Are you going to serve my EVERY need? You know, like... (Yuki smacks him) OWW! Bitch.
They follow the sexy maid with her too tight outfit and too short skirt to the table, where their dinner awaits them. After a very nice three course meal and drinks, all served to them by Shermie complete with much bending over, they relax in the living room watching movies and reading the instructions Hanzo gave them.
Guy- It says here... (reading) Enjoy yourselves while you can, come Monday morning, you're mine! Have fun, don't do anything to embarrass the Aya Uteo Ninjitsu Academy, stay out of trouble, and keep your clothes on in public.
Fuuma- Aww man. I was gonna do a streak in the park to impress Mai.
Mai- And why would that impress me? (Fuuma's face drops, he hadn't thought of that) It's not like you're Andy or... WAAAHH! Why can't all men be Andy Bogard? SOB!
Kurenai- Here we go again, calm down Mai. Look at the TV, look at Johnny Cage there in just a tight pair of shorts and his shades. Mmmmm. Yummy.
Scorpion- I really hate that jumped up pretty boy. He should be dead, DEAD! Burning in Hell for eternity! How come I'm ressurected as a spectre, while he had his death overwritten as a hoax? It isn't fucking fair!
Yuki- You're just jealous because he kicked you're arse in that movie "Cage Goes to the Netherrealm". And got to make out with Vice afterwards.
Shiki- Tell you guys who I don't trust. That maid.
Raven- How can you not trust her? She's perfect. Amazing body, sexy French accent, skimpy maid's outfit.
Kyo- Plus I think she likes me. She called me a very talented presenter during dinner, thinks I'm cute, and laughed at my joke about the sailor and the barrel, even though I messed the punchline up.
Shiki- That proves there's something wrong with her. Plus, if she's genuine, why has she got that oversized Beatles mop hairdo covering her eyes. The eyes, they're guilty, I bet you.
Raven- Typical goth, always spiteful towards other, better looking women not afraid to flaunt what they got.
Shermie- Hi everyone. Who wants cookies? I'll bring them to you. Leave everything, I'll clean up when you're in bed. I don't have to worry about people breaking in, not when I've got highly skilled, deadly ninjas protecting me, isn't that right? (strokes Fuuma's hair)
Kyo- (to camera) This is Kyo Kusanagi, top rated presenter, signing off. Goodnight.
Three hours later, and practically everyone is in bed. Their maid Shermie is still up, and so is Shiki, trying to prove her suspicions. She sees the maid speaking on a phone, the conversation sounds very suspicious, like she's in on something bad. Two minutes of eavesdropping later, and Shiki strikes.
Shermie- ...Yeah, they're here ma'am. They're putty in our hands, they'll be caught totally by surprise. I'm taking them to the mall tomorrow, we strike then just as you planned... Bye ma'am... (Shiki prods her with a knife) Oh shit!
Shiki- And what was that all about? What have you got planned, you shameless little whore! Come on, confess... HUH! (is grabbed from behind, in a very tight bearhug) AAAAAHHH!
Hinako- Some ninja you are, didn't see little me, the lady of the house coming for ya! A goth, huh? I hate goths. And I know how to deal with antisocial, geeky types like you. Shermie, fetch the high school locker.
Hinako keeps hold of her victim, squeezing the life out of her until she passes out. Shermie drags along a large, school locker. The big kind you see in American schools. The kind that, as seen in many a dumb teen high school show, nerds and others not considered cool get shoved inside and locked in. This is exactly what happens to Shiki, who is forced in, as she was many times during her school days. For added discomfort, they threw in a heap of old, sweaty gym clothing before locking the door. Whatever it is they have planned, it is clear now that Hinako is the ringleader. This is her house, and Shermie is her servant.
Hinako- That's one out of the way. This time tomorrow, I'll have crushed those hopeless ninja wannabes. Humiliated on their own show, this'll teach them. How dare KTV axe "At Home With Hinako" for this crap!
Shermie- Lucky for you, your shitty show only got fifteen viewers ma'am. Otherwise the student's might have realised this was your house, and something was up.
Hinako- That's right... SHUT UP! Do as your told! This plan has to be perfect. Now, get on the phone to Mavado. I'm relying on your affair with him to pay his gang less than usual. I'll show these peasants.
Next morning, after a lovely long sleep and breakfast in bed, the other students are being limo driven by Shermie to the mall. As before, Hinako remains behind the scenes, and with Shiki also hidden away, no one suspects that their maid is up to something malicious.
Raven- At last, free time. Yes, I'm gonna enjoy every minute of this.
Galford- By the way, did anyone happen to see Shiki this morning?
Shermie- Oh, the goth... uh, she's not coming. Said something about not believing in designer stores and brand names. Heh heh, typical goth, probably sulking somewhere to write a crap poem that doesn't rhyme.
Yuki- Oh, right. Well, she can be a miserable cow.
Strider- If she wants to miss out on this, that's fine. Come on guys, we're here. Let's go hit the stores. Last one in's a Bao!
Like hyperactive children, the class run into the mall, a huge shopping complex with stores of every kind. Inside, they split up into small groups and hit the shops. When they're out of sight, their French maid makes her way to a dark, quiet corner in the car park to meet her employer. Also here are the bandits from the forest hike, Mavado, Brian Battler, Wan Fu and Jack the Ripper. Goons hired by Hinako for this task.
Shermie- OK ma'am, they're inside. No, they still suspect nothing, not even the missing goth. Everything's ready for the next stage of "Operation: Destroy Ninja Academy".
Mavado- We attacked the real KTV crew meant to pick the students up last night. They're out of the way.
Hinako- Excellent. Soon, that prime time 9pm TV slot will be mine once more! The world will experience me in all my upper class, aristocratic glory. I'm especially going to enjoy destroying the female students. How dare they allow themselves to be considered more popular and better looking than me! They're peasants!
Mavado- But they are all better looking than you. No offence, but sumo and granny pants are a real turn off.
Wan Fu- Plus Shermie's much sexier, and far more popular than you as well. Especially in that maid outfit.
Hinako- SHUT UP! Bridget Jones wore granny pants, and she did just fine! And Shermie's different, she works for me. If we ignore the fact that I pay her wages to wait on me hand and foot, I practically own her. Now can we get a fucking move on and destroy the class, please? You all know what to do I take it?
Inside a music and video store, Guy, Kurenai and Strider are searching through the DVD section, looking for movies to watch during free time. Opposite them, Galford and Ibuki are in a designer clothes store picking out new clothes, which Ibuki already has bags of.
Guy- Let's see now, "Tetris: The Live Action Movie" shit. "Mario Enters The Princess's Tunnel"... hmm, Mario porn!
Kurenai- Hey, a Johnny Cage six DVD boxset... and it comes with a life size cardboard cutout of the man!
Strider- Scorpion's gonna go ballistic if he sees that. I'm gonna go look at the games. Hope they have the Max Payne/Final Fantasy crossover. I heard that Max gets into a love triangle with Tifa and Lulu.
At the other side of the store, the hi tech futuristic ninja goes to check out the new videogame releases. Four suspicious looking individuals dressed in sercurity guard uniforms surround him. His friends and classmates cannot see this, if Guy could, he would recognise them as the bandits who hassled them before. They've singled out the ninja on his own, and beyond help from his comerades.
Mavado- Well well, what have we here? A dirty little shoplifter, huh!
Brian- Trying to make off with "Max Payne 3: Payne's Final Fantasy" I see!
Strider- Come on guys, I didn't... I've got money you retards. Piss off, or I'll file a lawsuit.
Wan Fu- Ooh, he's resisting arrest. No more Mr Nice Mall Cop! Let's take him to the sercurity office, and give him a brutal beating!
Strider- You can't do this, I'm innocent! I'm a ninja, my classmates might not be able to help me, but I still have my mecha animals! Get 'em boys!
Jack- Guess again boy. (opens his clawed hand, to reveal wires and circuits removed from the robots) These claws are pretty cool for opening up your metal toys and removing vital parts inside.
The thuggish quartet take their victim, still unseen by his friends to the back room for the inevitable beating that will follow. Other customers think he's just a shoplifter getting what he richly deserves. In the mall control room, the evil, snobby little cow and her maid get the report that another ninja has been taken out. She already plotted the next step of her devious plan to eliminate the rivals to "At Home With Hinako".
Hinako- Yes, it's going well! Soon, all of those filthy low class ninjas will fall, and with them their reality TV show. I knew buying this mall would pay off one day. Now, for my next trick, I'm going to need a sample of your Orochi blood Shermie. Gimme your arm, this is gonna hurt like a bitch.
Shermie- How much blood are we talking ma'am? This wasn't in the contract! AIIEEE... uhhhhh.
Hinako sticks an oversixed medical syringe into the maid's arm, removing about a pint of blood. Shermie faints from blood loss, while Hinako wheels in a trolley with small plastic cups on it. Filling each glass with the demonic blood, she then adds fruit juice to them to make them taste appealing. Disguised as a free sample girl, Hinako wheels her trolley through the mall, stopping when she sees Ibuki and Galford.
Galford- This is great. I just wish Shiki was here too. I think she'd like the black shirt I picked up.
Ibuki- Hey look, it's a free sample girl. And she's got nice looking drinks. I am thirsty after all that shopping. I'll take one.
Hinako- Go on, they're free. Great new drink, which, uh, we haven't named yet. Fruit juice mixed with secret ingredients, look at the yummy redness. You have one too Mister, go on.
Galford- Yeah, I'll give it a go. (downs a cupful in one go) What the... AARGHH! GAAAHH!
Ibuki- I feel like... AAAHHHH! RRRRRHH!
Like Orochi Leona and Iori in KOF 97, the two ninjas are now berserk, mindless Orochi zombies in a Blood riot. Fuelled only by rage, which is made far worse at the sight of blood. Rather conveniently, Hinako is in possession of a small sample of blood taken from Strider Hiryu's assault. Seeing a group of the ninja students sitting at the food court, she throws the blood all over them, before running away. As the students are engaged in watching Scorpion and Raven in a burger eating contest, they fail to see their possessed friends until it is too late. By magic, Galford and Ibuki's clothes have also gotten darker than usual.
Kyo- Come on Raven my man! You're... What the fuck? (Ibuki slashes at his belly) OWWIEEE!
Mai- Hey, where'd you get the darker outfits? And what's up with... GAAAKK! (Galford chokes her)
Scorpion- I'm the token rage fuelled demonic... AAAAHH! (is double teamed by the Orochi ninjas)
Five minutes later, still yelling their heads off in incoherent anger, the Blood Riot crazed Ibuki and Galford leave Scorpion, Raven, Kyo and Mai injured and bloodied after a frenzied attack. On his own, Eiji sneaked into the mall control room, his intentions being to shut down cameras and shoplift unseen. The unwilling reformee ninja is very surprised to see their supposed hired maid hiding in here.
Eiji- Right, let's just disable these... Shermie? What are you doing here? Well you listen to me, you won't stop me turning off these cameras and making off with freebies!
Shermie- I wouldn't dream of disrupting your crimes. Such a ruthless villain like you, I wouldn't dare. (sees Hinako coming behind Eiji, out of his sight) In fact, bad guys REALLY turn me on. Do me right here, right now, but leave the cameras on. We can film it. (lies seductively on a desk)
Eiji- Uh... of course. It's only natural us villains make women hot, everyone likes a bit of rough. Come to daddy baby... WHOAH! (is picked up and thrown against a wall) Urgh! My head!
Hinako- Hello disgusting peasant! I'm Lady Hinako, Baroness of Sumo, Duchess of Granny Pants, and brains behind this whole operation.
Eiji- What fucking operation... GUURKHH! URRKK!
Shermie grabs the ninja's neck in a sleeper to soften him up, before suplexing him into the ground, her sexiness hiding Orochi enhanced strength. While she does this, her boss climbs up on the desk, and dives arse first into Ejiji's head.
Eiji- AAAAAHHH! Eww, granny pants! Couldn't you do this the other way round and have the maid drive her much nicer, thong clad butt into my face instead.? OWWW... (loses conciousness to a kick in the head)
Hinako- HOW DARE YOU! (kicks her victim repeatedly) You will acknowledge me and my oversized underwear as superior to Shermie and all others. THEY ALL WILL! (sees Yuki and Kurenai through a camera) Shermie, lure those two to the basement. Now is the time for me to utterly crush those inferior female specimens under my expensive designer shoe!
Shermie- Ma'am? Why do I always have to be the bait? It's demeaning, this wasn't in my contract ma'am.
Hinako- The role suits you perfectly. I mastermind the operations. You're a bimbo, I use your sexy curves and cute, compliant persona to distract peasants before I destroy them. You will obey me without question!
As the French Orochi maid follows her instructions, Hinako takes the beat up Eiji to the hippy craft store. There, Mavado and his goons are guarding students they've already defeated, and are currently busy torturing Fuuma with the "caught shoplifter" routine. Sitting locked in a small back room are Kyo, Scorpion, Mai, Raven and Strider most badly beaten up and in a daze.
Mavado- Did you have to pick THIS place for us to hide them away in? I hate hippy craft shops... OWW! (his head hits low hanging windchimes)
Hinako- It's ideal. Dark, smells dodgy, with Genesis music playing, meaning no one ever comes inside. Anyway, I better go, I have weak examples of the female gender to destroy.
Brian- Huh, oh right. (whispering when she leaves) Just because she's kinda dumpy compared to most fighting women and girls. Ha ha. (everyone else, goons and students laughs with him)
Hinako- I'm surrounded by neanderthals! I bet those goons only learnt to walk upright this morning!
Down in the basement, it is empty, apart from a wrestling ring for some bizzarre reason which shall be revealed. Kurenai and Yuki are led inside, suspicious, but not knowing the truth about Shermie. After a minute, they are surprised to see Hinako enter the ring over the ropes carrying a steel chair. She smacks this over Yuki's head, while her maid grabs Kurenai. Hinako holds the chair in front of the Red Ninja's head, for Shermie to ram the victim into it face first.
Hinako- Ladies, Gentelmen, and I suppose, peasants as well! Have we got an exciting, hardcore bout for you tonight! Introducing first, two silly little girls who's crappy show is taking the place of the beloved "At Home With Hinako"! And their opponent tonight, accompanied by her servant Shermie, make some noise and declare yourselves unworthy for... LADY HINAKO! (splashes the floored Yuki in the belly)
Kurenai- OWWIEE! What the fuck's going on? Didn't you used to have a crappy TV show, rated in reveiws as "a shamless excuse for Hinako to celebrate the fact she's a mean, stupid parasite with tons of cash"?
Hinako- I am better than you dirty peasants! Die you man seducing bitch! I know what you're like Kurenai!
The angry aristocrat lifts her much sexier opponent off the ground, and powerslams her back into the mat. Shermie follows this with her knee drop move into Kurenai's stomach. Yuki tries to step in to help, but the maid overpowers her, and lifts Kyo's on/off girlfriend over her head with ease. This sets her up while Hinako climbs the top rope, and leaps off, granny pant wearing butt first. The painful move connects into Yuki's head, knocking her out of Shermie's arms, and to the ground nearly flattened.
While two of his friends get battered about, Guy searches the mall, wondering what became of the others. He is getting desperate to find somebody, but all he's seen are shoppers who look like they were victims of an Orochi onslaught. Metro City's finest is surprised by a horrible smell of old sweat, which he finds is coming from Shiki, now free from the gym locker. Also with her, wearing a KTV crewman shirt is Andy Bogard, brother to the Legendary Wolf, lust object of Mai and winner of "Nicest Beat Em Up Hair 1992".
Guy- Shiki! I am so glad to see you! No offence, but I'll be gladder still if you'd had a shower first.
Shiki- Don't blame me. That bimbo whore maid and her dumpy little master Hinako shoved me inside a school locker with sweaty jockstraps and skiddy underwear. Revenge is the only answer!
Andy- Hi, Andy Bogard, head of crew for "Ninja Academy". I was the man supposed to meet your class, but Mavado's mob attacked me. Don't tell me you guys weren't just a little suspicious? Do you think KTV would have included a luxury mansion and sexy, obedient little maid in their budget for you? Yeah right.
Guy- Anyone would have been caught out by that. Just look at Shermie, so hot and seemingly innocent... Uhh, OK so Shiki wasn't fooled. Can we just go save our class and kick bad guy arse!
Andy- That's exactly what I've been wanting to hear. We checked the cameras, most are hidden in the hippy craft shop. Shiki, you go down to the basement and help Yuki and Kurenai, they'll need it. If those thugs have hurt Mai, or they're thinking perverse thoughts about her I'll...
Guy- (in his mind) Damn it, why did he have to come back! Just when I was getting somewhere with Mai...
Shiki stealthily makes her way to the basement, while Andy and Guy agree to charge heroically into the hippy craft shop. Inside, they engage the goons in battle, made difficult for both sides by constantly hitting their heads on dreamcatchers and shit hanging from the ceiling, plus the darkness and incense.
Mai- ANDY! GUY! Wait a minute... which one am I meant to be more pleased to see? This is so complicated.
Mavado- Just give up. You know one on one, I can take either of you second rate hero wannabes!
Guy- That might be true, but we're all ninjas. And ninjas aren't held back by fair fighting.
Mavado- What's that meant to... (Guy and Andy free their friends, now all looking for payback) SHIT!
Jack- G...guys... Nine of them, four of us? We're screwed man, screwed! AAIIEE! (gets fireballed by Andy)
Raven- Everybody pile in! Don't hold back! Stomp them!
The ninja trainees enthusiastically give the gang a taste of their own medicine, and a chance to show off their more powerful special moves. The thugs do not stand a chance, with students attacking them in a rage to rival an Orochi Blood Riot. With Mavado's crew having been made short work of, we now cut to the wrestling ring in the basement. Kurenai and Yuki have been laid out onto a wooden table by Shermie, for Hinako to leap off the top ropes, and smash both of the more attractive girls right through.
Hinako- OH YES! I rule, I am your superior! Admit it! Admit that I am your Queen, that "At Home With Hinako" is way better than your trashy program, and that you are nothing to me!
Yuki- Go to hell! Everyone loves us ninja girls more, even I'm superior to you, and I've never fought in KOF!
Hinako- Well, I can take my time on you bitches. Shermie, fetch me a glass of ice cold Austrian mineral water in a crystal glass. Have it brought on a tray of the finest silver. And be quick about it too.
Shermie- Very good ma'am. You enjoy taking out your insecurites and inferiority complex on those girls. Like you do to me, by employing a far more popular and sexy woman than you as your virtual slave.
Hinako- Believe me, I will... I DO NOT HAVE AN INFERIORITY COMPLEX! I AM A GODDESS!
Shermie leaves to carry out her employer's request, unaware that Shiki is lying in wait. The goth drags her into a dark corner by her twin ponytails, knife held threateningly against the front of her eye hiding mop hairdo. Fearful of a scalping, and her face being revealed to the world, the strong Orochi servant is now a whimpering, terrified mess, unable to fight back against Shiki. A roll of industrial strength packing tape is used to tie Shermie up, way too tightly to allow her to break free, even with her strength.
Shiki- Gotcha, bitch! Either you give in quietly, or I scalp you. I'm kinda curious what your stupid hair's hiding anyway. A horrible birthmark, a monobrow, a "Skins" tattoo, milk bottle glasses perhaps?
Shermie- Not the hair, please? No one must see my eyes, ever. I've actually forgotten what's so terrible behind there, but believe me, it must be bad. I had four years therapy to put it out of my mind.
Shiki- You've got real issues, you know that. I'll have that tray, ooh silver. I love silver. Now to shut you up.
More tape is used to gag the servant, preventing her from warning Hinako, and the bound maid is shoved into a cleaning cupboard. In the ring, Hinako is ranting away at how great she is, and getting angry over her maid supposedly slacking off. She is ringing a loud, annoying little bell to call Shermie. Therefore, she doesn't suspect a thing, until she feels a heavy, well crafted silver tray smash into her head from Shiki. As the evil snob staggers, dazed, Kurenai and Yuki seize the moment, and relish the chance for vengance.
Kurenai- We got you now, bitch!
Yuki-Let's see if this snob bleeds blue!
Hinako- Owww... uh oh! Come on sisters, don't hurt me! Us girls stick together, huh! AAAAHH!
Struggling up, they double chokeslam their opponent into the mat, then drive her head into a turnbuckle. Hinako is then laid out on the floor, with Yuki holding a steel chair against her head. Leaping into the air, her sexy tag team partner crashes down with a very painful legdrop, onto the chair, and into their tormentor's skull. They then leave, to reunite with their friends in the mall courtyard, and Mai is talking to Andy.
Mai- ANDY! Why did you turn up here! I did this to get over my hopeless crush on you!
Andy- Hopeless crush, I, uhh, really don't know what you're talking about. (goes bright red) Honest... We'll discuss this later, but first, I have the sudden urge to take this horrible itchy KTV shirt off.
Mai- Don't you ignore... (Andy is now shirtless) WOW! OHMYGOD! Have you been working out, you look even more studly than normal? I didn't think that was possible... (little hearts appear in her eyes)
Guy- Mai, hello! Earth to Mai! Can you hear me? Is that a dumb question? Come on Mai, talk to me.
Mai- (in her mind) Aww, but Guy's a hunk too, and he pays much more attention to me. If only I had the money to pay NESTS to splice their DNA for the perfect man... (out loud) OH CRAP! Orochi ninjas!
The frenzied, Blood Riot affected Galford and Ibuki make a return, now uncontrollable at the patches of blood covering their friends. They leap like wolves, with murder in their minds. The students are helpless, but... Ibuki and Galford fall to the floor, fast asleep, nearly comatose. Having sampled only a little Orochi blood, the effects do not last very long on them, and they both lie, sleeping their berserker rampage off.
Galford+Ibuki- Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz...
Strider- Whew, that was close. Think we might be able to finally relax now?
Scorpion- Oh great, just fucking great. That's my whole Saturday ruined now, after all this stuff.
Kyo- We were supposed to be enjoying R and R.
With what was supposed to be the best day of their weekend spoiled, and exhausted from all this, they spent a very lazy Sunday doing nothing, but wonder what Hanzo next has in store for them when they get back to the training camp. What will their next lessons consist of? What else will they have to overcome in their quest to become the world's greatest ninja warriors? Find out soon.
Very big thanks to Ninjitsuwolf for the idea of introducing Andy Bogard to the story, making Mai's life more difficult. I plan to keep him around, a love triangle perhaps? Who knows.
I hope I did a good job with Captain Vulcan's setup for this chapter, I think I covered everything. I'm honestly not crazy about either Hinako or Shermie, but hope I did them justice. Could have been worse I guess, like Bao and Kobra (urgh, what a thought). I used Hinako's rich kid persona to turn her into a nasty piece of work. Sorry Hinako fans, I had fun doing this with her.
Note- I had a scene with Hanzo and Taki planned, which was dropped for space. This chapter ended up much longer than I thought, and is mainly centred around the students in time off anyway.