Chapter Note; This is a new edited version of chapter 4 for those who had already read my previous Chapter 4 I apologize, I just wasn't happy with the product.

Chapter 4

Roman was due to go back on the road in two days, but as he watched Bianca moving around their kitchen still seeming dazed, and still slightly unaware of her surroundings, he wasn't sure it was such a good idea anymore.

Maybe he could talk to Stephanie and Paul, work out some type of agreement – he could still do the taped shows but miss the live shows. Right now he needed to be with B.

"B...We have fifteen minutes, could you rush a little?" He asked, as gently as possible.

Sighing, she nodded her head, putting the apple she grabbed from the bowl in her bag before finding her shoes. Bianca honestly didn't want to go see her OBGYN; the last time she was in that office she found out she lost Malakai.

The thought of being stuck in a waiting room, with all of those other woman holding their babies in their arms or carrying their babies still healthy in their womb, while she sat there without one, felt cruel. It was wrong, so very wrong – this wasn't how it was meant to be.

When they arrived Roman had to open her car door whilst holding onto her, making sure she wouldn't just crumble. He'd somehow become her rock in these last few days. Whether she realized how much she needed him or not before, she had a better appreciation for it now.

Before the loss they were together physically but emotionally they were strangers. Friendly strangers who had come together for the sake of their unborn child, they lived together but they barely knew each other. Roman had such a busy schedule and the few days he had off had just been spent awkwardly shuffling around each other. Bianca had only agreed to live with him because she had no-where else to go – not that she'd ever tell Roman that.

Now though, Roman was becoming her glue. A fact that honestly scared her.

He saw her face change when they inched closer to the clinic door and felt her pull on his hand. Bianca had stopped walking. He knew this would happen; B was a strong woman, a very strong woman, but this was enough to make a grown man break. He just might have, had it not been for her. Pushing aside his own fears about entering the door stood in front of them, he turned to Bianca and reached for her other hand, so he was holding both of hers in his.

"Look at me B," he spoke.

B shook her head no as the tears fell down her cheeks silently. Roman didn't deserve this, she couldn't keep breaking down on him

"Stupid, stupid, stupid," she started muttering, like a mantra.

Roman noticed her tears, wiping them with the pad of his thumb. "You're not stupid B, this is just overwhelming. Take your time, you can do this. I'm right here with you."

"I know, I just needed a minute."

Brushing the stray hair from her face, he kissed her forehead and engulfed her in a warm embrace, his arms encircling her waist. "Take all the time you need."

They stood there like that for a few minutes while Bianca gathered herself.

"I'm ready now," she mumbled against his chest, moving her hands and pushing herself away to look up into his face.

"Okay," he said breaking the embrace and taking a hold of her hand again. He needed her to know that he was here and he wasn't going anywhere. "Let's do this, then."

Walking in, Bianca was taken back for a moment. Just as she feared, there were mothers with their newborn babies and still-pregnant woman sitting scattered around the room. Taking a deep breath she looked up at Roman, for a reassurance and found it immediately when she looked into to his eyes.

Nodding her head ever so slightly, letting him know she was fine, he squeezed her hand just that little extra- letting her know he was too. They walked up to the desk.

"Hi, do you have an appointment?" The cheery receptionist asked.

"Yes."

"Okay then, I just need your name, appointment time, and doctor you're seeing."

"Bianca Anderson, 11 o'clock with Dr. Martin."

"Okay, then just let me look that up." She began typing away on her computer, "I see you're at 21 weeks now, congratulations. Not long now."

Roman looked to Bianca immediately and could see the tears already welling in her eyes.

"I-I, I, I…" Bianca tried to speak, but couldn't.

The receptionist looked mortified.

"Malakai was born five days ago." Roman spoke, pulling B into his side. "Stillborn."

"I'm so sorry, the file hadn't been updated. I'm so sorry, I don't know what to say, oh my goodness."

She rushed out of her seat and around to B, hugging her.

B felt uncomfortable in her grasp, moving out of the hug, trying not to be rude.

"There is a private waiting room a little up the hall, if you'd be more comfortable," she offered.

"Thank you," Roman said, glad that they didn't have to wait here with all the woman and their stares. While he knew Bianca had feared this part, he hadn't taken into consideration how much hurting he would also feel.

Sitting in the waiting room, B wiped her tears. "I'm sorry I broke down," she whispered.

"You don't ever have to apologize to me for showing your emotions."

"I just don't want to bury your pain with my own, you know? I feel like I've done all the grieving, Ro."

"We just grieve in different ways B, doesn't mean I haven't been. Why do you think the punching bag isn't on the hook anymore?" He laughed lightly.

Bianca couldn't help but laugh a little with him. "You're sure? I want you to be able to come to me, Ro."

He nodded, "I know B. I will if I ever need to again."

It was a comfortable silence from then on, til the nurse came for them.

The nurse weighed Bianca and recorded her weight loss – just over seven pounds. "It's normal to drop some of the weight quickly, but we must advise on trying to lose the weight slowly and maintaining your healthy diet to not shock your body."

"Of course."

Next she took the measurements, before checking her blood pressure, pulse rate and oxygen levels.

"Everything is checking out pretty well, okay? Which is great. Now, I know the last thing you want to hear me rambling on about is dealing with the loss right now, but it's protocol. We talk about a few things. Just...at any time you don't feel comfortable, let me know."

"Sure," B said.

Handing her several pamphlets, the nurse explained, "There is no right or wrong way to deal with your loss. Everyone deals with things in their own ways, however there are healthy and un-healthy ways of dealing with your loss. These handouts just cover a few of these. They offer support groups or lines; some even have sites where mothers have forums. I also lost a child at 22 weeks to stillbirth, so I understand this emotional path you're on. These aren't compulsory to look at or listen to, but speaking from experience it does sometimes help."

"Thank you."

The nurse continued to ask questions. Some actually stunned Bianca on how bluntly obnoxious and rude they seemed, like if they were planning on trying again soon. They weren't even together! At the end of the day though, they were mandatory questions and maybe if they didn't get asked she would never know.

Bianca had to continue taking her pre-natal vitamins, which seemed like a spit in the face. The nurse insisted though that it was for her own good, something about a woman losing precious vitamins during pregnancy and saying they actually helped boost those levels even after birth.

Then they had to talk about the god awful fact that her breasts had filled with milk and were increasingly painful. Bianca decided that she would pump the milk she produced and donate it to the hospital - that way a baby would still benefit from her body's produce. It was just another reminder that her body was ready for this baby, yet for some cruel reason there wasn't one.

The nurse gave her specific instructions on keeping any type of physical activities to a limit so soon after birth and made a not-so-subtle hint that the list included sex. Still not together! Was all B could think. However, a list of exercise routines specialized in strengthening the pelvic and abdominal muscles again were something the nurse advised to start doing after roughly the second week, just to tighten and strengthen everything down there back into working order.

When Dr. Martin came in they had to talk about the long lasting effects and the short term effects on her body. Bianca was still bleeding and spotting from the birth, and Dr. Martin insisted that should only last two to three weeks.

He did a small exam, checking to see if her body was starting the healing process it takes after birth, but also checking for any signs of infections.

All came back 'a okay' and clear. Thank god.

Of course, she still had to come back for her six week postpartum check-up so he could do a full and proper exam. The joys, was all Bianca could think.

Finally getting out of that office, Bianca felt like she could breathe again. "I hate that place."

"If it's any consolation; not my favourite place either." Roman shivered.

When they made it to the car Roman opened and closed the door for Bianca before going around to his door. "How about we do lunch, B?"

B looked over at Ro and smiled. "Lunch sounds lovely, Mr. Reigns."

Lunch was quiet as the two discussed insignificant things about life. It was nice to know they still had things to learn about each other. Plenty of things, really. Bianca wasn't really sure what Roman and she were right now. Were they friends? It seemed like a weird concept to her; they'd gone so long not really knowing each other - just co-existing for the sake of their impending child. Now, it seemed like they had the chance to actually get to know each other though.

Roman was beginning to realize he didn't know Bianca well at all, in fact he could almost admit he knew next to nothing about her.

He hoped, though, that their night together meant something to her – because it did to him.

At the end of the day, that night lead to one of the best gifts he has even been given, Malakai. Although Malakai wasn't there long, he made a life-long impact on his father these past few months. Those short few hours he held him near and dear had changed Roman from the party-going loose cannon still living like a collage frat kid to an adult, a man, a father, a provider.

Something Roman could never turn his back on: family. Bianca was his family now.