.
Truth Never Simple
The truth is rarely pure and never simple.
– Oscar Wilde
October 1979 – Hermione's POV
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My cheeks heated up with embarrassment each time I thought of James.
Mortification hadn't even begun to express my feelings on the matter. Not only had I made a complete fool of myself, but I had broken down so irrevocably.
Granted my entire world had changed beyond my comprehension, but that didn't excuse my unconstrained emotions. My only consolation was waking up and finding James Potter gone.
No immediate shame to bury, no pretending.
I had woken up groggily, my eyes all but swollen shut. My throat was parched, scratchy. My hair beyond repair with cuts and scrapes marking my body. In plain English: I looked like utter shit.
Sadly, I had cried something terrible that morning, thinking of Harry, my new situation, my options and the loss of everything I knew.
Pitifully I pulled myself together, and stopped feeling sorry for my pathetic situation. Tears weren't going to fix anything, and I had to fix something.
After bathing, dressing and finding a note James had left me, I set about. My first order of business (no matter how clichéd it seemed) reaching out to Professor Dumbledore. Like it or not, the Headmaster was who I needed. He had answers, resources and an imagination that would convince him of my time-traveling ways. I thought of going it alone, but even one person couldn't change the world without help. It was a necessity.
I needed that reassurance more than anything. I needed someone to know of me, to believe me. Though I had told James a little of my predicament, he knew little to nothing.
So Professor Dumbledore it would be.
Thankfully he appreciated the silly and over-the-top missive I wrote to him. Once one tickled the old man's curiosity, they were on his radar. A place I needed to be, but also loathed to be. Professor Dumbledore for all his amazingness, was still crafty. One had to be terribly careful around him.
By mid-afternoon, I had a return owl from him, inviting me for an evening snack and conversation.
The stone was thrown into the water and the first ripple started to fetter out. My thoughts of Harry and everyone lost pushed me further. My mind was made up: I would meddle with time, I would change what I could, and if that meant some eternal punishment, then so be it.
If I was punished for trying to eradicate evil from off the face of the earth, then it truly was a cruel and unforgiving universe we lived in.
Like it or not, I was returning to Hogwarts. It brought painful tears to my eyes.
This was for Harry.
This was for Ron
This was for James, Sirius, Remus, Tonks, Lily and countless, nameless faces.
This was for me.
.
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I silently walked the halls of my Alma Mater, allowing past memories from years spent to wash over me.
Hogwarts was the place where I had finally belonged; the place that allowed an eleven-year-old, bushy haired girl to fit in and find herself.
As a child, strange things happened around me for which my parents had no answers. So when an owl appeared out of nowhere, carrying a letter for a magically-gifted child I all but screamed in joy. I wasn't terribly different after all, and there was an explanation for my odd behavior.
My parents loved me unconditionally, but I could tell there was a part of them that feared what I could do. Professor McGonagall showed up, showed my family our first piece of controlled magic, and three days after my acceptance letter was sent.
I had been scared on my first train ride to Hogwarts, but hid it behind false bravado. I had read and studied the many books my parents had purchased for me at Flourish and Blotts, but it hadn't felt enough.
There were children who had far more knowledge about my new world, and all I wanted was to make sure I wasn't behind the curve; something foreign to me.
On the train I met few people. I had met the famous Harry Potter and the red head with the dirty nose. Seeing the red head fail at doing a spell did make me feel better. It wasn't his failure I rejoiced at, it was knowing that I wasn't the only one who may have problems.
While taking a boat ride across the lake, I looked upon the castle for the first time. It stole my breath away, literally; I had never seen anything so beautiful, ethereal and majestic. This would be my home for the next seven years of my magical career, and I couldn't wait to live my destiny.
The year started and I realized (that just like in the muggle word) I was shunned, friendless, and compensated for my lack of friends with my knowledge. I already knew what happened when I acted in such a way – people made fun of me for my know-it-all tendencies and refused to acknowledge me. I knew I came off as holier-than-thou, but I knew no other way to act.
I hid behind my knowledge and used it as a defense. I may not have had friends, but I had brains and the answers to questions. Halloween came and with the combined efforts of knocking out a mountain troll and lying for others I had two new friends. Harry, Ron, and Hermione became the trio of Gryffindor first years . . . inseparable.
The years passed and more adventures were had. We shared our lives together. We fought, we made up, we fancied each other, and we forgave. My love for Harry and Ron could not be touched. I sacrificed for them, but I never regretted my choices. Harry became my main concern and the very person my thoughts always revolved around.
Our times together cemented our relationship. No one compared. I was never sure what gave Harry such top-billing in my world, but he was there regardless – my Harry. My every action in the magical world started to revolve around him; every book I read contained some knowledge that he would later on need to survive.
I loved Ron, and I even fancied myself besotted with him, but even he couldn't compare to Harry. We were indeed a trio, but within that trio one stood out above the other.
Our friendship transcended certain definitions or confines of 'relationships'. I loved him with my heart and soul and would willingly give my life. I didn't love him like a brother or a lover, but as simply Harry. We weren't soul mates because I found that label too clichéd, but it was somewhere in that category.
I simply loved.
The ghosts of my past continued to breathe down my neck, whisper in my ears as I walked the empty halls of the school. I was nowhere ready to be in the school, so close to the place I had been torn from, but things had to happen, conversations needed to be had.
Thankfully, Dumbledore was an intelligent wizard and decided to take a meeting with me. I knew it was beyond clichéd to meet with Dumbledore, but he was a man with connections, answers and a support network I needed admittance to. However, I was smart enough in my own right and knew this man wasn't infallible. I was going in with blinders off and guards up.
Intrigued by what I had written, Dumbledore agreed to a meeting. He had offered the use of his floo in his response letter to me, but I wanted to walk the hallways again, allowing myself some semblance of balm to my broken heart.
After sending my Patronus to the Headmaster, letting him know of my arrival, the gates opened to allow me in. Dumbledore had already been advised of the shape my Patronus took and we decided that was how the Headmaster would be able to identify me.
I finally approached the Headmaster's office and gave the necessary password of pumpkin pasty to the stone guards. They stepped to the side and I rode the ascending staircase to the awaiting door. I politely knocked and waited for entrance.
"Enter please," came his gentle reply. I took one needed breath to steady myself then opened the door. Hesitantly, I stepped in, trying to pull myself from the last time I been here; when Snape had been Headmaster.
I was pleasantly surprised to see "Dumbledore's Office".
His many books lined the polished shelves of his circular office. Paintings of past headmasters and headmistresses hung on the walls and looked at me with interest. The little table that held his instruments was there with little clouds of vapor and steam puffing away. His large desk still sat in the middle of the inner room. And to my happiness the perch for his Phoenix stood behind it just to the left. Fawkes looked over at me and let out a soft cry. His music filled my ears and brought tender peace to my battered soul.
"Hello, Miss Granger. Please take a seat, child." Albus Dumbledore finally spoke. It had been more than a year since I heard that worn voice. It sent shivers through my spine. This situation was too surreal at times, causing me the most intense feelings of confusion and delirium. I felt in a constant state of Déjà Vu.
After shakily taking a seat, I finally allowed my eyes to fall on him: half-moon spectacles, longish beard, crooked nose, flashing eyes, serene smile.
Dumbledore seemed a relic that even time couldn't touch.
Fawkes' trilling pulled me from the still-alive headmaster and over to him. Unsurprisingly, he flew over to me and landed gently on my leg. His weight gave me a warm comfort and allowed me the time to gather my wits. I stroked his brilliant plumage as he sang his pleasure.
"Fawkes seems fond of you, Ms. Hermione." Though the headmaster tried sounding nonchalantly jovial, I could sense the undertones of suspicion, uncertainty and awe. I wasn't the only one a mixed bag of emotions.
"He's usually more reserved around those he's unfamiliar with. He shows regard to those who've shown me great loyalty." If he only knew the loyalty I had shown him.
I gathered all of my remaining courage and looked into Professor Dumbledore's aged visage. The lines on his face were not as pronounced as when I had known him. The war hadn't quite reached its pinnacle here. Yet here sat a ghost in front of me.
Fawkes rubbed his head into my chest, sending waves of serenity through my flesh. "Thanks, beautiful boy," I mumbled for his ears alone.
Bravely looking up, I spoke, "Hello Headmaster Dumbledore." He peered over his glasses, trying to further assess my character. I must have been a strange enigma to him, especially considering his familiar's reaction to me.
"Your letter was quite intriguing, my dear."
Straight to the point then, Dumbledore.
"You wrote it would be in my best interest to meet with you, that I had an infinity for woolly socks and that music was a magic beyond all we do here. Words I ascribe to. A strange missive indeed, Ms. Hermione."
I bit the inside of my lip, trying not to inappropriately giggle at my silly letter. Yet I knew it would get Dumbledore's attention without giving away any information if the letter had been intercepted. I was now on another level of paranoia.
"I must confess I have never heard of you and find myself stymied. I wonder why it is you wanted to meet with me and not someone else. Your name hasn't appeared in the books of Hogwarts, yet you know your way to my office. So please, my dear, take away an old man's suspense and tell me what you need of me." His soft voice made my heart constrict with pain.
I had missed him and mourned his death, yet here he sat in front of my very eyes. I could feel a tear slip, cascading heavily down my cheek. I wiped the skin below my left eye and replaced my hand on Fawkes. He had yet to abandon me. I contemplated what I wanted to say and how I wanted to phrase my words.
"Why do you cry, child?" the Headmaster asked while watching me wipe at my traitorous tears.
I ignored his question and asked him one of my own. A most pivotal query
"Do you believe in time travel, Professor?" My words caught his attention even more and he sat up straighter.
"That's an interesting question, my dear. To give you an answer, yes I believe in time travel. There are many theories on the subject and tests have been conducted. I myself have never experienced such a thing."
He was hooked.
"I don't know of any tests that have been conducted, Headmaster, only my knowledge and my own experiences." His eyes widened at my words, quickly catching my meaning.
"Am I to surmise that you are either from the past or the future, but not this present time?"
Bluntly, "Surmise all you like, Headmaster, but the words I will tell you are true. You may choose to believe them or you may call St. Mungo's and book me the best room they have available." He chuckled at my jest and the sound of his laughter made my heart clench again.
"I'm sure that won't be necessary. You seem lucid and like a level-headed young lady." I bowed my head in thankfulness.
"Now that we have established your sanity, would you care to tell me why we are having this meeting?" His fingers wove together and he placed them on his desk top.
There was no easy way to break into the topic so I candidly stated the truth, "My name's Hermione Granger and I'm from the future, Headmaster." My thoughts raced towards Harry, but I pushed him from my mind. I couldn't afford another breakdown.
"Through some unknown force, I was pulled back into the past." He tilted his head to the side as he searched my face for any fallacies, for surely I had to be lying. Fawkes trilled again and I continued my ministrations of his feathers, taking great comfort from his song.
"And this is truth you speak, Miss Granger?"
"Every word, professor," I said shortly and waited for him to continue.
"You seem like a lovely person, but we live in troubled times. How am I to know that you are not having me on or part of some nefarious plot to sabotage me."
Fawkes turned around, faced Dumbledore and started to angrily chirp from my lap, as if giving his companion a what-for.
"Thanks, boy." Giggling at an angry, chirping phoenix, I softly, calmly stroked his feathers.
"Your full name is Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore. Your parents are Percival and Kendra. You had a sister named Ariana who was thought a squib, but was far from it. She died at a young age from an accident involving you, your brother Aberforth, and a cl-close friend."
I awkwardly cleared my throat as bright tears started to cloud his eyes at my words. This was the only way (short of Veritaserum) I knew to get Dumbledore to believe me. I wasn't quite ready to show him my memories in his pensive, and Legilimes was out of question.
"Your mother is muggle-born, and your father pure-blood, which makes you a half-blood. Your childhood home was Mould-on-the-Wold. After your father's arrest you moved to Godric's Hallow, and there your family stayed until the death of first your mother, and then your poor younger sister."
I stopped speaking again, allowing him to take in my words. There was more I could say to him, but I didn't want to go on about his history and his mistakes. I tried to clear the tears from my eyes but continue to burn my irises.
"How are you able to know all this?" he asked sincerely, not out of anger but out of sadness and need. "There are only three people who know of the circumstances of my sister's death, besides me, and I know they would never break such a confidence."
I continued, "Firstly there is Aberforth who is a social recluse and spends his time tending the bar of Hog's Head. He would never betray his sister in such a way as for me to deceive you, no matter your history. Secondly there is Bathilda Bagshot whom tried to befriend your mother when your family arrived, but was refused. She became fond of you and later on you were considered friends. Thirdly there was her great nephew whose name I shall not say."
Again I didn't want to get further into his history
"I don't understand how you could know all these personal things about me, child." he murmured in confusion.
"As I've already told you, professor," I whispered, "I'm from the future. Some things I found out from a very reliable source." I thought of Aberforth and the story he had told us from his own memory, for his own need to purge. "There was also a book released about your life; your mistakes, your short comings, and speculations surrounding your sister's death, which didn't have all the details but most of them. As you know already no such book exist today, and the secrets of your family are safely guarded as of now."
I could feel my head start to hurt from the pressure, and the Headmaster's broken face wasn't helping. His regrets were written clearly on his face and it tore at my very heart.
"There has always been fodder written about me, but to mention my sister in a book and what happened to her is truly uncalled for." His wrinkled finger swiped the fallen tears from under his glasses.
"You see, Miss Granger, I tried to protect her, but I was never able to give her what she required like Aberforth. She loved him so dearly and only wanted to help. It is the biggest regret of my life. Please forgive an old man for showing such emotion, and pulling my skeletons from my families' closet, as muggles say." He gave me a sad smile that didn't even reach the corners of his mouth.
"Then you can understand my dilemma, Professor. When I first learned that I had traveled to the past I became terribly distraught. I know what happens to wizards and witches who meddled with time. It is beyond dangerous and can lead to many catastrophic outcomes, but I digress. When I learned of the time I had traveled to and the things I knew, I started to think, Professor, see. We were in the very midst of a war when I was brought here, and I knew the circumstances and some of the outcomes of past wars.
My voice started to sound strangled, frantic.
"I also knew the reasons behind Voldemort, the monster that had created such mayhem in our world. His changing appearance, his vaunted longevity. There are some things you may know about Tom Riddle, Professor Dumbledore, but you don't know everything, yeah?"
He gasped audibly at my words. This was one of the many secrets he kept close to his chest, and was more than surprised that I knew it. Dumbledore had started his research into Voldemort long before the prophecy had been told.
I continued, "He created a world where many died and I was wanted because of the status of my blood. Many were needlessly killed and so much innocent blood spilled, spilled, spilled. All for some notion that pure-bloods are better than half-bloods and muggle-borns. I watched as my family and friends were murdered before my very eyes. I have night terrors of their deaths and my mind screams with the images of their broken bodies. My most beloved friend was hunted by Riddle and his whole life torn apart.
My voice started to shake, "So I thought to myself and asked, if I had the chance to rid the world of Voldemort for good and others didn't have to die and many others didn't have to suffer for his pure-blood mania, would I, and I answered myself with a resounding 'yes'. If I never tried, Professor, it would be the greatest single regret of my life. How could I ever look my beloved friend in the face and tell him I didn't even take the opportunity to try? He knows that I try to save everything that breathes, it just how I'm built. Many say he has a saving people complex, but he said that they are full of shit and I'm ten times worse.
A smile broke over my lips as I thought of Harry and his absurd notions.
"How could I truly live with myself if I were to return to my time and witness all the destruction and anguish of other's knowing I had an opportunity to change things? I truly don't think I would be able to survive such massive and overwhelming guilt. I would drown under the pressure."
I whimpered and let my final words float in the room and sink into his mind. Spin, twirl and start to form in that brilliant mind.
"How can I allow you to interfere with time, Miss Granger?" His voice was grave, but I could also hear his reluctance.
Oh, how he underestimated me.
"Please tell me the truth, Professor. If you were taken back in time to the scene of your greatest failure or to a time that had the potential to be your greatest regret, would you try and change what you already knew? When you look into the Mirror of Eirsed, what do you see, sir?"
A tear fell from his eye and disappeared into his beard. They were simple questions that required complicated answers. There would always be unknowns, but I had learned in war one couldn't allow one's fears to dictate one's choices.
I gave him one more thing to consider. "If the time should come when you have to make a choice between what is right and what is easy, remember what happened to a boy who was good, and kind, and brave, because he strayed across the path of Lord Voldemort. Remember Cedric."
"Who spoke those words, child?"
"They were spoken by a very brave and smart man; they were spoken by you, Professor." The twinkle in his eyes weren't alight by the light that usually reflected in them, but by the tears that glistened there.
"I chose to remember Cedric, sir, a boy needlessly cut down by Voldemort, and I chose to remember all of the other countless people who were killed in vain. Which way do you choose, what is right or what is easy? One of the things I silently admired about you, Professor, was your ability to let others learn for themselves and to make their own mistakes. You allow a person to fall so that they know how to pick themselves up next time. You let a person face their challenges, which is their right, even though you know the dangers. You allow a person to learn their weakness and limitations by fighting and learning the things they need to for their own battles. You help along the way, but step back when necessary. This is now what I need from you."
The lines on his face were even deeper than when I had stepped into his office. I knew this was going to be a difficult meeting and the evidence of that was written on both our faces.
Fawkes had beautifully trilled during the meeting, giving us both the strength that was needed and appreciated. Dumbledore lifted his head and looked to Fawkes. The Phoenix looked at him in return as if in silent communication. A tear slipped from the Phoenix's eye and fell to my lap where it disappeared in a wisp of steam.
"You speak words far beyond someone your age, Miss Granger. I'm sure you have lived and witnessed things that have changed you in ways one cannot imagine. War is such a sad state in this world, and something I don't think will ever be outgrown. But we aren't speaking of others, we are talking of Tom Riddle and his ambitions to take over our world because it doesn't conform to his rationality or beliefs. I watched you, my dear, as you spoke and I could find only sincerity in your words. The fact that Fawkes is so attracted to you shows a purity of heart that not many possess. You asked me would I change something if I had the opportunity and knowledge, and I don't have an answer.
Instinctually, I knew he would change Arianna's lot in life given the chance.
"Everyone is different and no two people think alike. I speak to others of bravery and love. I also speak to others of acceptance and death being the next great adventure. These ideas coincide, but they can also contradict each other. You show bravery in wishing to rescue those whom you love and cherish. You want to change the unfairness and injustice which was inflicted upon them. I would say that is an admirable ambition and shows the very core and essence of whom you are. Then there is the other side of myself that would lecture you to accept what has happened. It does not do well to linger on things of the past and forget to live, but then there is the conundrum, you are living in the past.
He stroked his bread as he made his speech. I simply wanted to know where he stood. Even if I didn't have his support I would continue on my own. My mind was set and I wasn't going to waste an opportunity that was given to me, no matter how in vain.
Harry, Ron, James, Sirius, Remus and everyone else deserved differently.
"So what does this all mean, Miss Granger?" That was the very thing I wanted to know. "I will not stand in your way. I've never been presented with such an opportunity and have never been in this situation. But I will let you make your own choices and as you said so eloquently earlier, I will allow you to fall so that you can learn. I will be there if needed, and I will give help to you if you require it." I felt the smile take over my mouth, feeling warm, salty tears that fell from my lashes.
"Thank you, sir. You have no idea what kind of weight that's been lifted from my shoulders. I just knew you couldn't allow such atrocities to continue when you had the potential to stop it."
"I suppose you know me well, Miss Granger? So what can you tell me of Riddle and his plans?" I thought about what I wanted to tell him and instead of answering his question I decided to ask one of my own and see how I could take him on.
"Tell me, Professor Dumbledore, have you met with Sibyll Trelawney yet?" He gave me a confused look. "You are in need of a Divination Professor, are you not?" This time his face registered surprise, something that wasn't commonly displayed on his wrinkled face. I wanted to laugh despite the seriousness of the situation.
"My surprise has obviously given you the answer you seek. Would you be so kind as to tell me how these questions are prevalent?" I considered him for a moment but decided to ask him another question.
"Do you have any hope that Sibyll is a true seer, Mr. Dumbledore?" He let out a chuckle and I couldn't help but laugh with him.
"Again, Miss. Granger, you seem to know the workings of an old man's mind and have no need for me to elaborate. I'll soon come to be useless in your presence."
"Allow me to give your life some purpose," I jested. He lifted his hand in a gesture for me to continue. However, he couldn't hide the smile that broke over his aged face. "In a couple months times you will arrange a meeting with Sibyll Trelawney and she will relate to you a prophecy." His face showed his skepticism about her abilities, but I knew he would soon believe. "She will tell you something that has the potential to change the status quo of the times." At the seriousness of my voice the look of unbelief left his face and morphed into more open-mindedness.
"Am I able to trust you, sir?" I asked him deeply, wanting to know that he could give me what I needed, but also taking the lessons I knew of him and applying them to my choices.
Even if he answered in the affirmative I wasn't sure if I could simply rely on his word. I wanted to see if he would be honest with me. The time where I trusted everything he said blindly was far behind me. I was in a precarious situation, and I had to take all precautions.
"I would like to answer you with a whole-hearted yes, Miss Granger, but I would be remiss with your trust. You know my past and you know I'm fallible. I know my weaknesses, child, and power is one of those things that corrupts me. I have stayed in this post because I felt it has been the safest place for me. I am still intellectually challenged and able to have a say in the lives of our future generations. I have shied away from the many offers of being Minister of Magic because of my proclivity for control. So if I am to answer you honestly, I would like you to trust me, but I wouldn't," he said in an almost defeated voice. I had seen the Headmaster saddened and disheartened, but I had never seen him dejected. I guessed his being honest brought him back to the root of his problems.
"Headmaster, allow me to say that I'm thankful for your candor. Of course you already knew I had knowledge of your past dealings, but you could have still withheld the truth from me. I am going to tell you what I know, but I will require a Wizarding Oath on pain of death from you. I don't do this out of spite or anger. I have many things that in the wrong hands could be the end of our world, and I do not joke. I will need your help and your support."
He studied me over his half-rimmed glasses and the twinkle that usually accompanied his eyes was vacant. I knew he was taking me seriously and not playing his senile grandfatherly games.
"You have my word, Miss Granger, and I will also make the oath. My word I give out of my respect for you, and the oath I give to you as a gift." He looked me full in the eye and spoke without blinking. He brought his wand up to his face and aligned it with his crooked nose. I copied him and listened to the words he gave.
"I, Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, of sound mind and under no duress do freely swear on pain of death under the laws that accompany a Wizarding Oath I will tell no one of Hermione Granger's, or any other alias she may attain, secrets unless given express permission to do so by said person. I will be honest and forthcoming with her in my words and actions. Do you accept?" he asked.
"I do."
"I do solemnly swear on pain of death under the laws that accompany a Wizarding Oath that I will give and provide available help to aid Hermione Granger, or any other alias she may obtain, on any and all missions that help to rid the world of Lord Voldemort after being given the details of the mission in disclosure and honesty. Do you accept?"
The headmaster was correct in adding such a provision. I would have thought less of him if he had completely given me full reign of his powers without there being some balance and disclosure. One could easily be persuaded by Voldemort, and Dumbledore knew this all too well. My respect for him deepened. I answered him with full confidence, "I do."
"I do solemnly swear on pain of death under the laws that accompany a Wizarding Oath that I will be there for Hermione Granger, or any other alias she may obtain, if she has the need to talk to someone. I will give her my shoulder to cry on if needed, to lean on if the pressure becomes too much, and to take over her mission if death were to take her without letting my penchant for power corrupt me. Do you accept?"
Again I was touched by his words. He was making it possible that he couldn't repeat his history unless he wanted to die. He was also offering me the comfort and support I would undoubtedly require along my journey.
I was strong and I could deal with many things, but everyone needed someone to lean on and he was willing to be that person for me. There were no guarantees that I wouldn't die, so I was happy there was someone else who would continue my mission if I weren't able to. Thankfully I answered, "I do."
"Is there anything else you require of me, Miss Granger?" I knew there was one more thing I needed, but was afraid of how he would react. This was the most important thing I required.
"Yes, Headmaster. I need you to promise that you will not act on the information I give you without my express permission after disclosing all details of my plans to you. You will not conduct any missions using that information or have others do anything in a round-about-way that could foil what I need to do. I need you to not interfere or try and dissuade anyone who may want to help me with my missions. This is what I require of you, Albus Dumbledore, and if you cannot give me this oath than all else is in vain."
"You ask for much, Miss Granger."
I thought of what he said, but I knew it was essential. He was known for doing things his way and not having regard for others. He believed that he was doing everything for the greater good, and kept his secrets close to his chest. It was as his brother said: he learned secrecy at his mother's knee.
"I know, sir, but this is what's needed. I would not ask if it weren't." He let out a heavy sigh and I could see the resignation on his face.
"I do solemnly swear on pain of death under the laws that accompany a Wizarding Oath that I will not act on the information Hermione Granger, or any other alias she may obtain, gives me in any way without her express permission after disclosing all details of my plans to her. I will not conduct any missions using that information or have others do anything in a round-about-way that could foil what she needs to do. I will not interfere or try and dissuade anyone who may want to help her with missions. So long as she lives and breathes. Do you accept?"
I played over in my head the words he gave to me, making sure there were no loop holes for him to act in a nefarious way behind my back. I needed complete honesty from him and not half-truths. After finding his words adequate, I said my part of the oath knowing he would be bound by his words, "I do."
"Then so be it, Miss Hermione Granger."
"Then so be it, Headmaster Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore." As I finished my words, gold lights flew from the tips of both of our wands and intertwined before they sunk into our wand hands and faded. We lowered our wands at the same time and I let the residue of power settle around me before I opened my eyes again.
"Since I have made a promise not to do so, allow me to caution you, Miss Granger, having so much power at one's disposal has the ability to corrupt one in ways one cannot imagine. Even if one has the best of intentions there are always ways in which they can fall. I speak from experience when I say . . ." I opened my eyes and looked up to the ceiling. I knew many (of course not all) of his experiences and at that moment I didn't need to hear them; if I required his guidance in the future then I would ask, but for now I wanted to end the meeting.
Solitude was much needed.
"I already know, Professor Dumbledore," I spoke in a kind but sad voice, remembering the tragedies of his past. His blue eyes didn't twinkle as he looked back at me, a girl who wanted to alter the past for her loved ones. "And please call me Hermione. We have shared magic after all." He nodded his head in resignation.
"Of course you already know, Hermione. Then I wish you the best, my dear. Of course you will have me at your disposal and my resources. I'm sure you're already familiar with . . ."
" . . . The Order of the Phoenix," I finished for him, the familiar twinkle returned to his eyes.
"The very same." He folded his hands and leaned further back into his chair as he examined me. I felt a gentle probe into my mind, and held in my anger.
"Please don't disrespect me, sir. I hold you in high regard. Even when your protégé lost his faith in you, I defended you to him, spoke of your love for him no matter what was written in ink on the pages of a slanderous book. When he learned of your past and the mistakes you made in youthful arrogance and folly I again defended you, trying to make him see that everyone makes mistakes, no matter how infallible one may seem in a later age. If you have questions, ask. Don't attempt to enter my mind without permission." I told him in a serious but soft voice. "It's something I won't tolerate."
Shock was the first emotion that ran the gambit on his face which was quickly followed by remorse, and then respect. His cheeks tinged pink, and I wondered if he had blushed or was taken by surprise. He had the good manners to look sheepish. I supposed he thought me untrained in the ways of Occlumency. There were more surprises about me he would learn in time.
"If I apologized for my lack of propriety, would you believe me?"
"Of course," I replied without haste. Dumbledore had his many faults and I was no stranger to his misjudgments, but I also knew he loved and he regretted hurting those he loved.
"Then I am sorry, Miss Granger."
"Then I accept." His genial smile returned to his face. I knew I was here for a certain reason and I wondered what the best way to go about it was. I bit my bottom lip in concentration and then berated myself for such a telling and terrible habit.
Raising my hand, I put a silencing bubble around us, not even wanting the portraits to hear what I was about to say. I could see them yelling, but thankfully, no sound penetrated my magic.
I swallowed the vast amount of moisture in my mouth and told him the prophecy,
"The one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord approaches . . . born to those who have thrice defied him, born as the seventh month dies . . . and the Dark Lord will mark him as his equal, but he will have power the Dark Lord knows not . . . and either must die at the hand of the other for neither can live while the other survives . . . the one with the power to vanquish the Dark Lord will be born as the seventh month dies . . ."
"I know how to kill him and make sure he doesn't return without this prophecy having to be fulfilled."
"But you've heard the prophecy yourself, Hermione. It is told that there will be a special person whom will have the powers to vanquish, and it was specific that it was a male."
"Yes, sir, I have heard it but there is also something you must realize. A wise person once told my best friend that if Voldemort had never heard the prophecy then it would not have been fulfilled. Not all prophecies are fulfilled. There are some that come about but are never heard by anyone."
"And who may have that been, Hermione?"
"Why, it was you dear professor," I said with a smirk on my lips, which would have made Malfoy envious.
"You like to use my words against me, Hermione," he said, eyes twinkling like mad. "I must say, and forgive me for being forward about myself, but I seem to be even wiser than I am now." We both chuckled at his words.
"So it would seem." I looked at the clock on his wall and saw that it was past midnight. There was something I had to do and I wanted to accomplish it tonight. I knew that it would solidify my decision to change the past, and finally be one step closer to ending that horrible monster.
"Sir, if I have your permission there is something I need to do in the school. It is the beginning of my mission. Please know that I would never put any student in harm's way, and what I have to do won't affect anyone in the least, except for myself. The students are in bed and it would be the perfect time to do it. I ask for your trust, sir, and for your confidence. Please know that I want no personal glory, thus I had you take the oath not to tell anyone. I just want our world to be better and free for everyone to choose what they want." I stopped my passionate plea when he raised his hand to silence me.
"I know, my dear. I ask that when you are done you would take the time to let me know what you did. It doesn't have to be directly after, but sometime in the near future – no pun intended."
We both laughed and I felt lighter about what I needed to do with having his confidence. I stood up reached out my hand and waited for him to reply. He didn't disappoint. He placed his in mine and we both shook. He turned my hand over and placed a kiss above the knuckle, "Good luck, Hermione Granger, and I'm here if needed." I quickly squeezed his hand, released it, removed the silencing charm about us and turned for the exit.
As I was about to open the door, Fawkes flew off his perch and followed me. He landed softly on my shoulder and I turned back to the headmaster after he cleared his throat. He had a strange look in his eye, but I could also see curiosity and amazement. I guessed he wasn't used to seeing Fawkes respond in such a way.
I wanted to reassure him that all was fine, but I didn't have much time to waste. I was needed elsewhere. "You will return my phoenix to me won't you, Miss Granger?" His face showed his humor and his voice was filled with mirth. It was good to have the old man back in my life. He had truly been missed.
"Nitwit, blubber, oddment, tweak," I said to him, not being able to restrain myself. His boisterous laugh reminded me of Slughorn, but it was oddly comforting coming from Dumbledore.
"A girl after my own heart," he said as I left his office to take care of something that would began my new journey in the past, and my mission in ridding the world of the monster who had taken so much from it.
Things were happening faster than even I imagined.
The ripples were about to fetter out further than ever before.
.
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AN: Thanks to all who reviewed. This chapter as always is dedicated to you.
There were several questions: No, Harry and Hermione were never dating. As she described in this chapter, their relationship was beyond that. She loves him like no other. In the books, JK wrote the most beautiful of relationships
to me… that of Harry and Hermione. They didn't have a romantic love, but I believed they loved each other the most. Hermione actions speak the loudest. Everything she did was for Harry. She even chose Harry over her love of Ron (her hearts choice). To me that speaks of a friendship that transcends so much. So pure and beautiful.
Second, Lily will make her appearance. We are only in the third chapter, and this will be a longish journey. She will be in the story plenty.
Third, Hermione will have romance in this story. What is fanfiction without it. Stick around for that, loves. ;-)
Forth, I know the first several chapters were angsty and sad, but I wanted to convey (in a realistic way) the emotions Hermione is feeling. I can't even fathom being ripped from everything I know and that's familiar and being transported to a time I don't belong. The emotions would be overwhelming and so surreal. I would literally breakdown. Angst won't be the only emotion in this story. There will be levity, love, happiness, fright, pain, anger, and a whole bag of emotions.
SOOO, sorry for the long AN. And please, stay tuned. Many hugs.
Disclaimer:Directs lines from the books are those of JK Rowling's amazing work. No copy right infringement is meant.